How much do you spend on a neice/nephew's wedding present?

booklover

Hello everyone

As in the title. My husband wants to spent about £250 on his nephew who is getiing married soon. but we cant afford this. Also we have 20 nieces and nephews from 2-24 so what we do for 1 we have to continue for the others.

They have a wedding list ans expect items eg. good dishwasher, plasma tv or American fridge freezer from us (aunts or uncles).


Any thoughts on this or what you all spend please.:T

We are not very close seeing them maybe twice a year but did see them regularly when he was young.


many thanks in advance


booklover

duchy

They "expect" ????? Did they tell you this ?
Without knowing your income or family traditions it's hard to say if this is reasonable or not but simple facts say if you can't afford it or think it's unreasonable then you give something you can afford or think is reasonable.

rainmac

I think you should give what you can afford to. £250 is so much money even if you can afford it :eek:.

I would choose not to buy from the list and go for something a bit more personal. A nice frame or vase. You could put togther a wedding scrapbook so all they would need to do is add the photos and some wording. How about making a hamper with a nice bottle of wine, nice glasses, chocs... I've seen someone on here make a wedding cake with towels, looked stunning all wrapped up on cellophane.

Don't be pressured into buying something so expensive if you can't afford it. We had a wedding list when we got married but didn't have anything so expensive and didn't receive anything that expensive either.

Good luck x

Alison_B

I probably would spend that. When my niece moved into her house with her boyfriend they told us that they would never marry, so we gave them £500. I am very close with my sister and her family, so it felt right to do at the time. Looking back now, I wouldn't do it again.

If you can't afford to spend the £250, I certainly wouldn't be thinking of it. Have they had a house together before or is this their first time? One of the best presents I received when I got married was a hamper someone had made up for us, it contained all the little things you need but don't get as presents - pegs, brushes, dusters - things like that. Another present that was lovely was a fruit tree - the message attached was that it could grow daily like our love and produce fruits.

paddingtondoo

Blimey £250 :eek:.

We got married last year and I would have been far too embarrassed to put anything that big on my list. We asked for vouchers so that we could put them together and get what we wanted. I still shudder at the cost of our saucepans but OH tells me they're brilliant :rotfl:.

I don't see much of my family now as I've moved away but used to stay with aunts and uncles when I was small but most of them are retired and on a budget. We got between £20 and £50 from most people and if we'd got any more I would have been quite upset as we didn't get married for the presents.

I would never give more than £50 for a wedding present a very close friend got married recently and 2 of us went halves on a microwave and we did the bride a gift basket - total cost between us £70

riggerz

I think £250 is far too mch even if you can afford it! You have to bear in mind the other costs that you will incur with the wedding, ie new outfits, hotel stays etc, etc.

When I got maried I was overjoyed with whatever we got be it £10 or £100.

Give what you can afford no matter how little and if you hear any complaints you know where you stand and just have to remeber not to give again;)

Rikki

I think its rude to ask for big items like that from guests no matter how close a relative they are.

£50 is what I would limit myself to for close family. I would give money or a voucher for their store of choice and they can put it towards something of they want.

minimacka

My SIL got married last year and asked people to give them cash (i have no problem with this) as they already had a house together, we gave them £100 she was more than made up with the money that they got and it went towards 2 new double glazed doors.

I personally think that £250 is too much money and I would be very embarassed asking for that amount of cash. I would rather people gave what they could afford and not be made to go into debt.

MM

full-time-mum

I wouldn't even spend that on my siblings.

We spent around £20 on cousins and between £20-£30 on my brother. (It was his second wedding)

When I put together my wedding list (several moons ago) I was very conscious that people would want to spend varying amounts. I selected items starting at pocket money priced klippets/wooden spoons to more expensive items such as a food process/deep fat fryer. I would never have added TVs or dishwashers - I'd have been far too embarassed.

sethsgran

I agree so much with what has been said. For a niece/nephew I would probably limit us to a max of £40. We go to tons of wedding each year as my husband was at one time the lay preacher so he did the marriage ceremony and I didn't always buy or give cash as my relationship with the couple wasn't so close, also I am always helping in other ways as I am quite creative so decorations etc and running them to wholesale florists etc is my part. They all enjoyed us being part of their day. We have even been to weddings where the couple have requested "no presents" as we have all we need and once we were asked on the invite that if we did what to buy they would like us to donate to a certain charity as for both bride and groom it was 2nd time round.
Only spend what you genuinely can afford.

patentgirl

My DD got married last year and close family gave her between £25 - £40 we are off from a big family and they were well pleased with that they wouldnt have expected any more than that £250 is way over