I'm so angry!

spooney7

Hi guys,

Hope everyone is doing ok, I just need to vent a bit!

For the past year I've been travelling to uni with two of my classmates and giving them petrol money. Sometime last year they decided that I should pay £20 per week, but towards the end of the year we were only in uni 3 days a week so I gave them £10, which they told me they were not happy about.

Anyway, last week we were once again in for 3 days so I gave them £10, and one of our classmates mentioned that she thought that they were asking for too much money. I didn't say anything, but due to an error on my part (I got the dates for uni break mixed up and didn't budget enough for petrol money) I only had £10 available to give them this week.

The plan was to give them that and £10 again next week, and make up the difference in a fortnight as soon as I got paid if it was okay with them. Suddenly, it all kicks off and they're saying that I haven't been paying them enough for months, their logic being that as they both drive, I should make a bigger contribution. Also they said that I should pay more because the added weight of a passenger means the tyres need changing more often, and that it costs the same to come to uni for 3 days as it does for 5 (it's a 47 mile round journey, so apparently the difference of nearly 100 miles is irrelevant!).

I had every intention of paying them, and I would never expect them to take me to uni without getting money in return, but I thought the way in which they confronted me about it was quite nasty. To sum up, I will be taking the train from now on, which means getting up an hour earlier and may cost a bit extra. However, even though giving them the extra money would be the easier option, I'm being stubborn and holding on to my principles.

I would really appreciate some advice- am I being unreasonable?

Minxy_Bella

Are they going to Uni anyway or are they making the trip especially for you?

Sorry for being sarky but they are out of order, IMO. You've been giving them money and it's their fault if they weren't happy with the arrangement - they should have sorted it out with you beforehand. You're not going to be knacking their tyres THAT much!!

I would get the train! Stuff 'em!

xxx

wigglebeena

If they're arsey now they'll be worse if you give in. Some people are not worth the trouble. See how they like not having their transport costs subsidised!

wigglebeena

"it costs the same to come to uni for 3 days as it does for 5 (it's a 47 mile round journey, so apparently the difference of nearly 100 miles is irrelevant!)."

You can't argue with someone who's 'right' even when they're clearly wrong.

sammy115

So

for five days a week someone drives 47 miles and takes two passengers to uni and charges them £20 each.

so thats 235 miles a week and gets £40 petrol. (obviously the owner would have had to put £20 in so £60) - that 25p per mile. which actually is quite reasonable for wear and tear, repairs maintenance etc.....

Maybe you would have been better giving them £12 instead of £10 as £20 over the five days would have been £4 per day.

MiniLaura

I'm a non driver so been in that position of paying petrol money for journeys - and not being too sure what the actual petrol costs were and if it was being fairly split etc - if they are making the journey anyway and not going out their way to pick you up/drop you off personally I dont see what their problem is...its reducing their costs as it would cost them more if you werent sharing the cost etc.

Surely if there is three of you one of the others should be paying the same as you for petrol costs or do they altnerate cars? (or do they both own car?)

I get so fed up with people who drive and mess about when giving lifts or try and make you feel really grateful you are getting a lift even when your contributing to the cost of them running the car

spooney7

Thanks for the quick replies.

They both have cars and alternately drive each week. We all rent the same accommodation for uni, but one of them spends most of her time in her home town, which is a fair bit away. She says that because she has to come from further away I should pay more, but she would have to travel the same distance to pick up the other girl who she shares the driving with.

I wouldn't have a problem giving them £12-15 as we are not in for a full 5 day week anymore, but apparently it's not enough- they want the full £20 for the three days. They don't pay each other money, because they share the driving, which I can understand. If they had approached me about it in a calm manner, then I would have been fine with giving them more, but I was basically told "Give us more money, or you're losing your lift". Rather than talking about it, the two of them ganged together and made me feel really awful- they made me out to be a right sponger, and because I mainly hang out with them at uni, I feel really isolated now!

Anyway, thanks again for all your replies. It helps to talk to you all.

Peekay32

They're f**king idiots, f**k them.

You think they're bad now? Just wait til they start a job and end up in middle management...

You're better off without those two idiots messing with your head.

RAS

Hi

Just di som calculations and lost them, but..

Based on the allowance that the HMRC allow before expenses claims attract tax deductions, you should be contributing 10p per mile if there are three of you in the car.

Any more and they are profiting which means they need to pay tax and they are invalidating their insurance policies.

fatpiggy

How nice to be able to afford to have and run a car when they are students!! Why don't you see about buying a scooter? Alternatively, many universities have car-share websites where you can see if there is anyone else who you could travel with. I'm always happy to pay my way with anything, but refuse to be had as a cash-cow. Now your ex-friends will be worse off financially if they aren't getting anything from you. It wouldn't surprise me if they didn't come crawling back in a few weeks. As for feeling isolated, going to university is all about meeting new people and making new friends. It will actually do you good to talk to other people. Try joining a student society or two.

MiniLaura

RAS wrote: »

Hi

Just di som calculations and lost them, but..

Based on the allowance that the HMRC allow before expenses claims attract tax deductions, you should be contributing 10p per mile if there are three of you in the car.

Any more and they are profiting which means they need to pay tax and they are invalidating their insurance policies.

I'd find that on the HRMC website and show them it! LOL