I'm back (VERY SCARED) debt free diary

epsilondraconis

Hope things pick up again soon Kelie.

From reading your thread, I get the feeling you would be better off quiting Avon, getting a part-time job so that you have some guaranteed income every month, and then working on your web-design contracts the remainder of the time.

Plus getting shot of the OH; however I guess the ball is in his court on that one. Hopefully he'll make a big effort in his 'last week'.

Seaxwyn

Well done getting all that work done, and fab news about the ebay sale.

What reason does your OH give for not applying for those jobs? Unless he has a really good excuse, I think he is taking the mickey and you should stand by your ultimatum. How can he justify living off you? And sorry to hear he is pressuring you to buy beer again.

I agree with epsilondraconis, Avon does sound like a waste of time and effort - it is never going to make you a lot of money and it might even make you none. I think you would be better stopping it and putting the time into building up your web design business, or getting a part-time job.

Good luck with it - you sound as if you are making a lot of progress, especially after your recent bereavement.

Swinstie73

Hi Kelie,

I think it's a good idea to make minimum payments to your cards and pay more to the one with the highest interest rates. My own are a bit weird cos I have 0% ones with a higher balance which I'm throwing all my money at but only because my other one has a small balance and not much interest. Think most people try and pay off the one with loads of interest - makes sense I guess.

Hope the OH gets his finger out soon. x

Seaxwyn

Oooh yes - I forgot to say - definitely a good idea to pay minimum payments on all but the highest interest debt, and throw every penny you can on that one.

Have you had a play with the snowball calculator yet? https://www.whatsthecost.com

kelie

Must admit I am a bit frightened to play with the snowball calculator lol

I know I need to. I would ideally like to make some big lump sums so that I can pay off the cards quicker. If I have no debt I will have more of a chance at a remortgage. I worked until 2am last night on web design stuff, and got up this morning delivered those books (only took 30 mins thankfully), now I am on the computer for the rest of the day. I've told my mum we'll go to the chemist tomorrow so that I haven't got to make 2 trips. I feel bad cos she is on her own but so many hours just disappear if I go there nearly every day.

OH is downstairs, not looked at jobs yet, he had packed all his stuff yesterday and even called his mother to come get him. He is very childish, and last minute he decided he wanted to stay. To be honest from the last few weeks, I get the impression he isn't in love with me at all, which really hurts. I am going to get on the job centre website in a minute and print off any jobs he could do and take them downstairs and see what he says.

Thanks everyone for your replies. It is really reassuring you are all reading what I'm up to. Its a great place to vent, and share your worries, ever since I have been using this diary I have felt less pressured. I think i might book into the doctors though because I am really exhausted, and feel drained/tired all the time. I'm guessing its stress related, but it's not very useful!

kelie

Urgh All the jobs I thought he could apply for aren't on the job centre site anymore. There is nothing he is qualified to do listed.

poddle911

:wave:Hi Kelie, just thought I'd say hello and I'm still following your progress. You're doing so well with the web design stuff so it must be very frustrating that the other things are out of your control - like OH's behaviour and your Avon peeps. It does sound like the Avon isn't going to be worth it...

Sorry to hear about OH's job situation. Yes it is incredibly difficult to get a job at the moment, but it is IMPOSSIBLE if you don't try and I think you're going to have to be really strong and stick to your ultimatum. Otherwise he'll never take you seriously and think he can carry on getting with sponging off you and drinking. A huge well done on not getting him beers the other day, i can't imagine how tough it is.

Regarding the debts, it's well worth doing a snowball calculator. There is a theory that paying off your smaller debts can be a real boost psychologically. So, you would make all your min. payments and then chuck any extra cash at your Virgin cc (even if it isn't the lowest interest) and you'd clear it quickly which is a great feeling! Yes, you will end up paying slightly more interest but it really works for some people.

Keep up the good work and take care of yourself

TheBex

Hi Kelie,

I totally agree with poddle. I've jsut cleared one CC with £43, and left the slightly lower rate £550 balance at the minimum, becuase then there aren't so many. After you've done that though and cleared the smaller one I'd start with the highest rate.

Epsilondraconis raised a brilliant point, that getting a P/T job would give you a known amount every month. It would also give your week more structure, which tends to help keep one ticking over.

Have you tried the reed website? There's loads of jobs there, and it's a way better set up than the job centre one.

OH is taking the !!!!. You do need to let him go now. I now it won't be easy, but it'll be miles better for you than staying with someone who drags you down. How did you feel after the beer incident? Imagine not feeling like that again! How much simpler to move the best mate in, get structure in your day, know that £xxx is coming in every month for the bills, etc etc, and she'd stop you getting lonely. And I was thinking about your situation with the ex - Would the best mate be interested in buying him out? Because if she were, then you could get a joint mortgage with her, which might help boost the chances of remortgaging if her credit file is clean. You would need to work something legal out with her first if the deposit is solely yours....

Right, off to clean the pantry.

Chin up chicken

kelie

Everyone was right He dumped me. As soon as I stopped giving him anything he wanted, like drink, money or lifts in the car.

Seaxwyn

Oh - that must be a blow - poor you. Hope you are not feeling too bad about it.

Looking on the bright side, there is nothing to stop you now being in control of your money and managing it exactly how you wish. Is your friend still interested in moving in with you? That could be a big help.