Debt free - i wish

bunnybaby_2 · 15 February 2005 at 3:24PM

Where to start!

Ive just worked out between 2 loans and various credit cards - we owe almost 40,000 my husband works but i dont as we have 3 small children all under five - it feels like i spend my life worrying about where the money is coming from - we havent defaulted on anything YET as i am constantly juggling - ive done some card tarting to get better rates on wot we have but because i dont have a real income i been refused for most of them - i mention all this to my husband and his answer is we will have to bring some more money in - i feel like its all down to me and we arent getting anywhere.

Debt_Free_Chick · 15 February 2005 at 3:55PM

it feels like i spend my life worrying about where the money is coming from

Firstly, perhaps you should worry a little about where the money is going? not trying to be offensive or flippant, but you have spent £40,000 more than you (your husband) has brought in. I think one of the most important aspects of dealing with debt is to understand what you are spending money on. Only then can you see where to cut back.

A few years ago I was spending £250 a month on food for two adults. I now spend about £100 - £120. I also used to buy "posh" cleaning stuff, but realised that it only gets washed down the loo/sink so I now buy cheaper stuff that does the same job.

I don't think that shuffling cards is the whole answer here. Firstly, you need a firm budget. List all the "must pays" like mortgage, council tax, utilities etc. Look to get better deals where you can e.g. by switching utility supplier.

If you don't work, then you should be able to get good shopping deals e.g. buy meat at the butcher (not the supermarket) buy veg from the greengrocer, market, barrow boy, farm shop (not from the supermarket). Make meals from scratch, not ready made (sorry if you already do this).

his answer is we will have to bring some more money in

This will help too. Do you have any junk you can sell on eBay or car-boot sale? Is there any type of work you could do part-time, at least until you get back on your feet?

To reduce debt, you need to increase your income or decrease your expenses. If you do both, you'll be rid of your debt even quicker.

HTH

bunnybaby_2 · 15 February 2005 at 4:29PM

Hi

I spend between 40 - 50 per week on food shopping - this feeds 5 plus i home cook anyway - i wish i could get a job but i am expecting another baby which im not too chuffed about as it makes me feel even more useless - mostly it has gone on the house yes been selling stuff we dont need anymore husband had a job change which brings in less and stuff has happened over the past but thats too much to go into - we dont have holidays, we dont even have days out, if we can ride it out for a few months then i can possibly get a job once the new one is born which will help, we dont have nights out kids is probably one of the biggest spends - although charity shops and car boots is mostly where stuff comes from these days. yes been changing things around to get the best deals on utilities and stuff i know its going to be a hard slog to get back to normal

Debt_Free_Chick · 15 February 2005 at 4:36PM

OK - sorry if I sounded patronising in my first reply. It was difficult to tell from your first post. Sorry :-(

You might be best with a Debt Management Plan, whereby you make an agreement with your creditors to pay a fixed amount each month to repay the debt. Some of them may freeze the interest.

You can do this yourself if you wish. From this link, click on Debt Advice, then England & Wales then Self Help Pack. It talks you through the whole process and gives you tips about negotiating with your creditors

https://www.nationaldebtline.co.uk

You can call them at any time if you have a question or post here if you prefer. National Debtline is a charity that helps people in debt. There's no charge for using them and they're friendly & helpful.

HTH

Spendless · 15 February 2005 at 5:12PM

Hi

Have you told tax credits about the change in your husbands income as you may be entitled to more money.

Also let them know when you have your new baby cos you are paid an extra amount for the 1st year of your babys life.

When you're ready and able to go back to work,does your husband come in at a set time each evening. I used to have a part-time evening job in Focus Mon-Fri 5pm-8pm. Could you do something like this?

Good Luck

bunnybaby_2 · 15 February 2005 at 5:34PM

Yes all up to date at the mo - will do once baby is born - had a job all lined up for evenings at a place and then found out i was expecting so that came at a bad time really one step forward 2 steps back

Malestrom · 15 February 2005 at 10:38PM

My wife and I were in a similar situation to you. We ran up over £50,000 of credit by living outside our means for nearly ten years. Then it suddenly hit home that if we didn't take some serious action, we would be playing the 'rob-peter-to-pay-paul' credit card shuffle until we retired! We took out a Debt Managment Plan and all our creditors froze the interest on our debts. We are now paying less per month but due to not paying interest, we are actually paying off MORE of our debt.

We also have a little spare income to use for things which we class as luxuries but which were always taken for granted when you could just 'put it on the card'. A trip to the cinema with the kids is a luxury in our house! We have a long way to go (just over seven years) but we know that we will be completely clear of our debts at that time. Its best to think about what you will do with all the free cash when you have cleared them, rather than dwell on how long it will take. As I always think when i'm feeling a bit sorry for myself "I ran those debts up, now i've got to pay for them'.

Its a difficult step to take, and you may not think its the right step for you, but for us it was the best thing we ever did. If you are unsure about taking out a DMP then you could talk to your local CAB, or follow Debt_Free_Chick's advice and call the National Debtline. Their services are free.

With another baby on the way, the last thing you need to be worrying about is debt! I hope you get something sorted soon.

Good Luck.

bunnybaby_2 · 15 February 2005 at 10:56PM

Thanks ive been looking at a few tonight - next bit is to chat it over with hubby as i want to get on the road to recovery and not get in deeper than we already are.

Malestrom · 15 February 2005 at 11:54PM

Don't go for a fee-based company if you decide to get a DMP sorted out, National Debtline, CCCS and the CAB will all help you for free

There are lots of Debt Management companies on the net, most charge!

lauren79 · 16 February 2005 at 11:58PM

Not sure if it's available in all areas but members of my family have benefited from payments from SureStart when they have had new arrivals.
This is a £500 payment (not a loan) to cover the cost of a new baby but there is no ties on what you spend it on.
More details can be got from your Health Visitor or https://www.surestart.gov.uk

Debt free - i wish

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