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ATescos Funny!
Minxz
Posts: 840 Forumite
Sorry if in the wrong place- but a friend emailed this to me and it made me laugh, loudly!!
Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
boyfriend along shopping .
This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in
Oxford:
Dear Mrs. Murray,
While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty
Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you
and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his
antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by
our surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
trolleys when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
feminine products aisle.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and
told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a
Calor gas stove.
7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him,
he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the
antidepressants were.
10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming
the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practiced the "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.
12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker,
assumed the fetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices
again."
And; last, but not least:
14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a
while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."
Yours sincerely,
Charles Brown
Store Manager
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
boyfriend along shopping .
This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in
Oxford:
Dear Mrs. Murray,
While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty
Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you
and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his
antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by
our surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
trolleys when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
feminine products aisle.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and
told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a
Calor gas stove.
7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him,
he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the
antidepressants were.
10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming
the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practiced the "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.
12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker,
assumed the fetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices
again."
And; last, but not least:
14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a
while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."
Yours sincerely,
Charles Brown
Store Manager
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
0
Comments
-
Thanks for that it really gave me a giggle0
-
Nice one lol:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :T
That's going to be seen all over the office tomorrow.
:rotfl: :rotfl: :TI'm just looking, I'm not buying.............
All Debts now paid :j
New Project Tesco points collecting :rolleyes:0 -
OMG I nearly peed my pants!0
-
lol that is funny
:rotfl: :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :rotfl:0 -
That is great!!! I'm even considering trying some of them...especially the alarm one if possible!!0
-
Ha Ha Ha :rotfl:
That is so funny, Although a little embarrassing......:embarasse
I say this as I get soooooooo :embarasse Embarrassed when shopping with my Dad and we get to the shopping aisle /shelf with anything that makes loud noises.
For Example:
:xmastree:Christmas is a nightmare as he will press the button, switch, hand, foot, any part of an item to set it off singing and making a noise.
"Not that bad" - :think: you are all thinking.
EXCEPT
He will press the button, switch, hand, foot, part of all the items on each of the shelves, doing all the shelves in the whole isle reaching to make sure he hasnt forgotton about the 1s at the top or at the back,
And this sets them all off singing and making a racket as none of them are in sequence with any of the others.
The worst part is, he has managed to teach my 4 year old son to do it and they both do this in the shop laughing :rotfl: and racing to see who can press the most.~~~~~~~~~~~~:kisses3: "In Raising Your Children;" :kisses3:"Spend Half As Much Money n Twice As Much Time."0 -
It's a cracker , it's the way you tell them:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:0
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Omg, Pmsl. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:0
-
hahaha, i wanna do the condom one! especially to the ones who would get embarassed by it.
One of my many joys at working in boots was the people who bought the condoms.0 -
thanks thought it was great0
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