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Advice Needed Please !!!
missylou_2
Posts: 327 Forumite
Hi, this may become a bit of a confused rambling post, but please bear with me as am making myself sick with worry. Have been hedging around posting for over a week now, and was finally given encouragement to do so by SOUTHERNSCOUSER so thank you!
Recently my parents began receiving calls from several debt collection agencies looking to speak to my younger sister. I contacted my sister, (who has not lived at their address for nearly year) to let her know what was going on and offer support/help to sort her situation out.
She told me that she thought she owed nearly £20,000 to 5 creditors and had stopped paying all creditors several months ago as she could not afford to pay them and live as well.
Told her to sit down and write a list of her income and necessary figures so that we could see what was in fact available to offer to creditors.
Meanwhile I sneaked around my parents home like a cat burglar trying to retrieve all her mail so that could find out who exactly was chasing her, and for how much!
Opening these letters made me physically unwell as most threatened court action if immediate settlement was not made. It turns out that she owes over £36,000 to 8 creditors. In a panic I tried to contact these companies to try and sort something out as my sister has thus far refused to contact them as she is so ashamed of her situation.
I was told by each company that they would on discuss accounts with my sister. Yet somehow (not quite sure how it happened!), each company took a £150.00 switch payment from me to prevent court action being taken for 28 days, also giving me time to persuade sister to talk to them.
She is behaving like none of this is real and is nit happening to her and have in two weeks been unable to persuade her to call them.
If I could pay this off I would, but I just dont have a spare £36,000 lying around.
What am really looking for is advice on realistic offers of monthly payment amounts, which I will contribute towards.
Advice on how to make my sister face up to her situation would be greatfully accepted also.
Maybe a bit of a rant too but how can financial institutions responsibly allow a 24 year old recent graduate to accumulate so much debt?
Sorry it is a bit of a long post but my brain doesn't seem to want to cooperate.
Recently my parents began receiving calls from several debt collection agencies looking to speak to my younger sister. I contacted my sister, (who has not lived at their address for nearly year) to let her know what was going on and offer support/help to sort her situation out.
She told me that she thought she owed nearly £20,000 to 5 creditors and had stopped paying all creditors several months ago as she could not afford to pay them and live as well.
Told her to sit down and write a list of her income and necessary figures so that we could see what was in fact available to offer to creditors.
Meanwhile I sneaked around my parents home like a cat burglar trying to retrieve all her mail so that could find out who exactly was chasing her, and for how much!
Opening these letters made me physically unwell as most threatened court action if immediate settlement was not made. It turns out that she owes over £36,000 to 8 creditors. In a panic I tried to contact these companies to try and sort something out as my sister has thus far refused to contact them as she is so ashamed of her situation.
I was told by each company that they would on discuss accounts with my sister. Yet somehow (not quite sure how it happened!), each company took a £150.00 switch payment from me to prevent court action being taken for 28 days, also giving me time to persuade sister to talk to them.
She is behaving like none of this is real and is nit happening to her and have in two weeks been unable to persuade her to call them.
If I could pay this off I would, but I just dont have a spare £36,000 lying around.
What am really looking for is advice on realistic offers of monthly payment amounts, which I will contribute towards.
Advice on how to make my sister face up to her situation would be greatfully accepted also.
Maybe a bit of a rant too but how can financial institutions responsibly allow a 24 year old recent graduate to accumulate so much debt?
Sorry it is a bit of a long post but my brain doesn't seem to want to cooperate.
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Comments
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you've been very understanding and supportive, but she really needs to face up to this herself. as you and your parents know about it at least she isn't going to need to hide anything which can be a real strain for some. help point her in the right direction but don't do it all for her.Time, Tide and Diarrhoea wait for no man.
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Hi there, the best thing that I can think of to suggest is to visit the CCCS website on www.cccs.co.uk and have a look at that, and try and persuade your sister to look too. She could put all her details in on line, not have to speak to anyone on the phone and it would work out a reasonable amount to repay each creditor.
Also, Matthew and Emily from CCCS are members of this forum so are available to answer any queries - very handy!!Successful women can still have their feet on the ground. They just wear better shoes. (Maud Van de Venne)Life begins at the end of your comfort zone (Neale Donald Walsch)0 -
oops forgot, maybe remind her the baliffs will be knocking on mum and dads door, does she really want to do that to them?Time, Tide and Diarrhoea wait for no man.0
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Hopefully your Sister is greatful to for what you've done for her already. I'd suggest she contacts PAYPLAN or CCCS to see if a DMP would be an option for her. But she has to face up to the reality she's in this amount of debt and it's going to be a while before she's paid it back even with your offer of help. I'd sit down with your Sister and do a SOA then you can work out what is left over to pay her creditors - PAYPLAN/ CCCS would need this anyhows. Once you know what you've got to play with then she can contact her creditors and make offers to repay. As for Financial Insitutions allowing her to do this yes it is criminal but what did she spent £36K on would be what I'd be asking0
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Thank you all for answering so quickly. My parents actually don't know, (thankfully are both a bit hard of hearing, won't admit to it though!) and have misheard what they were told, Capquest became Natwest, and so on. My parents think these are telesales calls, and it is best to keep it this way as they are both extremely anti debt live within your means type of people.
I made a huge point of informing each company that she does not live at parents address, but stupidly gave them mine instead! Does this mean that they will be knocking on my door instead?0 -
If you told them your Sister lives at your address then yes I'd have thought there was a possibility.0
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OMG what do I do now?
I just told them to send letters to my house as was trying to protect parents!0 -
i'm really not sure about this, i think i'd phone them again and give them her real address. you don't want to be getting the calls or letters either!Time, Tide and Diarrhoea wait for no man.0
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What am really looking for is advice on realistic offers of monthly payment amounts, which I will contribute towards.
Advice on how to make my sister face up to her situation would be greatfully accepted also.
Hi hun. Glad you posted.
OK now I know you want to help and you think you are but she needs to sort this mess herself. You've given her a helping hand to start but now it's down to her. She won't learn the full lesson of this if you are doing it for her! I might be young in my years (how old does that make me sound? :rotfl: ) but I've directly seen it before. She needs to take control.
She really needs to speak to the CCCS. Ask her some of the following questions. It might scare her and give her the kick up the @rse into making the phone call.
1) Does she want ballifs knocking on your parents door and taking their belongings?
2) Does she want them doing the same to you? (don't worry, they won't, if she sorts it)
3) Does she want to be made bankrupt?
4) Does she want to be refused for something like a mortgage or even a mobile phone contract for the next 6 years?
She has to make that call to the CCCS. Everything is fixable no matter how bad things are. But the only way to fix them is to face up to it all. We are always here to help and it seems you are aswell (just don't help her financially). 0 -
I have to help her, am sure is in the job description as am her big sister!0
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