Treading water, but sinking fast........

treading_water_2 · 4 January 2008 at 12:11AM

Hello everyone, this is my first time in the forum so it's heartining to read the success stories and words of encouragement. Don't really know what I am expecting, advice maybe or just some kind words at a difficult time. Really struggling at the moment, basically my husband and I have huge debts, I have suffered with depression for over 12 years and due to this my work history has been some what sporadic. I have never claimed sickness or incapacity benefit and have therefore struggled from job to job, leaving when the depression got to much. We have managed to stay on top of our debts and keep the wolves from the door, but I don't think we can hold them off much longer. I have been lucky in that through the right medication and counselling I have managed to cope with my depression for a good year now, however just lately things have been going downhill. The debts feel out of hand and the depression is back with a vengence I feel like giving up, I can't see a way out of this hole and I can't fight the depression with this brick round my neck, yet its a vicious circle if I give in I don't get paid and the debts just get worse. The citizens advice bureau have been great, negotiating reduced payments, etc and luckily the debts are unsecured but I am terrified of losing our home, I feel angry that we have never been able to get any help or benefits, due to the times that I have been unable to work my national insurance contributions do not cover any sickness benefits. I really can't see a way out and feel like curling up into a ball and letting everything take over. I am writing this in a last ditch attempt to make some sense of it all, any advice or contributions willingly received. Thank you

southernscouser · 4 January 2008 at 12:17AM

Hello hun and welcome to MSE. You won't regret posting.

OK firstly and most importantly is your health. Have you been to see the quack? :think:

Secondly, have a read of this thread of someone who is also new to the forum. She felt quite similar to you but within hours she had turned the screw and was ready to take back the control. I find it very inspiring and hopefully you will aswell.

Thirdly, have a read of this thread and in it you'll find details of how to post a SOA (state of affairs). Then we can see what we can do to help you out.

Shineyhappy · 4 January 2008 at 12:21AM

Hi and welcome to the boards!

Have a look at one of the sticky threads at the top of the debt free wanabe board for new posters. For us to really be of help, we need to see your SOA (statment of affairs) which is all your incomings and outgoings and the debts. Then hopefully we can make some suggestions and be of some help to you.

There is always a way out of every hole and hopefully when you have the debt under control you will feel better. I know getting my debts sorted has really helped me to sleep better at night and not get so stressed about things!

tigerfeet2006 · 4 January 2008 at 12:21AM

Hi and welcome to the board. You will get a lot of advice from the good folks on here but the first thing they are going to want to see is a SOA (statement of affairs). If you check out the thread for first time posters at the top of the front page it will tell you how to do this.

If you find that your thread is slipping at any time and you feel you need more help don't be afraid at anytime to bump it to the top again. This is a fast moving forum with lotd of posters.

All the best.

ecoelle · 4 January 2008 at 12:27AM

Hey there. I'm quite new too. I don't know anything about the legal side of claiming benefits and have no specific advice to give you at the moment but wanted to say that the people on this website are fantastic. When i'm worrying about money and the last thing i want to do is confront it, this may seem strange, but i come on here and look through the 'new posts' section, on the green bar at the top, there's always something which catches my eye. You'll find that in there somewhere will be a post which makes you think/laugh and as you move around threads you'll find hints, tips and things to make you smile. There's an answer to your troubles and maybe these threads are the start of you finding it. Well done on taking your first step and posting. First tip check out the budget planner on the scroll bar on the right and the old style forum is great for ideas on being thrifty with the money you have.

smashedbooboo · 4 January 2008 at 12:48AM

Hi all, TW has 2 threads running as im sure you know, Have asked a mod or site helper to merge the 2 together. Hope thats ok. x

smashedbooboo · 4 January 2008 at 1:00AM

If i were you until the threads are merged i would stick on this one treading water, You have the creme de la creme looking after you on here. southern scouser has given you some things to look through tomorrow. So go to bed and pretend its christmas day tomorrow. Its the same sort of anticipation wanting to know whats in those threads. Its all good. Try and sleep tonight babe. And unplug the phone if you can until you have read up on everyhing. Have some peace for the weekend. x

Treading water, but sinking fast........

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