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  • FIRST POST
    • Shoxt3r
    • By Shoxt3r 18th Apr 19, 12:51 PM
    • 53Posts
    • 17Thanks
    Shoxt3r
    First-time Mum & Dad - any tips for money-saving?
    • #1
    • 18th Apr 19, 12:51 PM
    First-time Mum & Dad - any tips for money-saving? 18th Apr 19 at 12:51 PM
    Hi all,

    So my wife and myself are due to be first-time parents and looking at getting things together for the baby's arrival (all being well!) in September.

    We've done the usual things like putting together a list of essential things we'll only need to get us going and also been in touch with friends who have kindly offered to provide us with some bits like a baby bath. We'll then look at getting anything else nearer the time or post-birth.

    After looking on eBay and Gumtree we've found a few potential travel systems and cots, and looking at various sites to get advice on the best ones to go for. The I-Size or Isofix systems seem to be the easiest and most secure and both are supported by our car.

    However, does anyone have any tips on sites they've found useful when looking for reviews and general advice? We're already signed up for Bounty but haven't been getting much from them in terms of vouchers that we'd find useful - I guess it's all a bit early anyway?

    Thanks in advance!
Page 2
    • Mrs Imp
    • By Mrs Imp 19th Apr 19, 9:51 PM
    • 974 Posts
    • 1,586 Thanks
    Mrs Imp
    At this stage buy the absolute bare minimum. You will likely be offered a lot, plus unless you live in the sticks and it's 10pm on a Sunday evening you can pop out to the supermarket to grab whatever it is you need.

    Baby needs nappies, clothes, food, somewhere to sleep, some way of getting home.
    Mum needs post partum pads, breast pads and a lot of support.

    There are so many ways of bonding with a baby that don't involve feeding. If mum intends to breastfeed, then she will have to pump for every feed that you give in order to maintain her supply. That's a whole lot of extra work for her. Instead why not do bath time, or swimming lessons, or reading bedtime story (Mr Imp did this from day one), or taking for a walk and chatting to them about anything and everything. Baby wants to hear your voice, see your face, and smell you. That's how they bond. If mum is on maternity leave then baby needs to see them as main caregiver. I had a couple of unfortunate weeks where my youngest wanted Mr Imp rather than me, and he was at work. Youngest cried a LOT until he got home from work. It's soul destroying.

    Avoid perfect prep machine. The 'hot shot' of water is not hot enough for long enough to sterilise the milk powder, and the insides have been known to collect mildew. Not a risk you want to take with a newborn.

    No cot bumpers or cute cot pillows/duvets etc (that'll save some money).

    Avoid Emma's diary and Bounty, as they will sell on your details (been there, done that, got the enormous amounts of junk mail, spam, etc).
    • barbiedoll
    • By barbiedoll 20th Apr 19, 1:59 PM
    • 4,948 Posts
    • 13,647 Thanks
    barbiedoll
    There are loads of baby clubs to sign up with BUT....open a new email account just for these, you will get loads of spam mail enticing you to buy life assurance, private health plans, etc etc. Bounty have recently been fined for selling on data gleaned from eager new parents, they are a dreadful company, donít give them any ammo. And whatever you do, donít give your phone number out....you will be hounded with sales calls. If a site insists on a number, give a false one (your mortal enemy perhaps? )

    My ďbabyĒ is now 21, but I can remember getting a voucher for a pack of nappies from one of the baby clubs, which arrived on his first birthday! So they can be worth joining.

    Formula: donít think that more expensive=best. Theyíre all much the same (by law) so just buy the cheapest. Your baby wonít know the difference!

    Toiletries: babies donít need any apart from nappy cream and (possibly) baby shampoo. The latest advice is to not put any creams or oils on the rest of their skin for the first 3 months, (unless they have a skin condition, and you have been advised to do so by a doctor) You will hear conflicting advice on this front as not everyone is up-to-date with this. They really donít need coconut oil, olive oil or anything else, even if their skin is a little dry after the birth. And definitely not baby oil, which is made from petrol by-products!

    Good luck, itís a fabulous, scary and exhilarating time...but it doesnít need to be too expensive. Save your pennies for future bicycles, Playstations and ballet/karate lessons...itís only gonna get worse!
    "I may be many things but not being indiscreet isn't one of them"
    • Shoxt3r
    • By Shoxt3r 23rd Apr 19, 12:36 PM
    • 53 Posts
    • 17 Thanks
    Shoxt3r
    Wow so many great insights, thanks very much!
    A great thought is around "nipple confusion" which is not something we'd fully appreciated but makes so much sense. As many have said there are many ways to bond with a baby so we'll be using those alternative methods instead. As some have said we'll have a bottle and steriliser on standby if things don't work out with breastfeeding.

    We've resigned to the fact that we will be buying a travel system from new just to make things easier, have peace of mind with the guarantee and also ensure that there is no damage to it (i.e. if we bought second-hand this would be uncertain as many have said).

    We've made a shortlist of essential items and will be buying these first and either asking others to buy other things we "need" or just buying them as we need them later on.

    A couple of additional things we've thought about....
    • My wife is now starting to get pain around her hips and upper legs with the additional weight
    Is there anything that can be used to relieve this without resorting to painkillers? It's fairly mild at the moment and a short walk while out yesterday did help to some extent. She's also doing some antenatal exercises using an exercise ball and some YouTube videos which appear to be helping but if anyone has any other tips it would be much appreciated. I'm usually giving her a back-rub to help relieve some of the pain but it doesn't seem to be enough.

    • We've started looking at some deals on travel systems - only Halfords and Mothercare so far but we're finding some conflicting specifications.

    There's one favourite we've found by Joie but we're confused by some of the terminology and the offers - for example the Joie I-Level gives the ability to lie the child seat flat, whereas the base is fixed?

    The Joie I-Gemm seems to be the seat that people rave about in reviews but there's no clear comparison between the I-Level and the I-Gemm...?

    Also it isn't clear what the difference between Isofix and I-Size is - they appear to be the same thing?
    Our car will support both Isofix and I-Size I found out after extensive searching (surprised that no website has a clear guide on what to go for in each situation and why - we guess that a lot of people simply visit a store and ask there instead?)

    For example - the Halfords bundle we've found below seems to be a steal...?
    https://www.halfords.com/kids-zone/travel-systems/travel-systems/joie-chrome-dlx-stroller-with-carrycot-and-i-level-travel-system-bundle

    However, Silver Cross have an Isofix system but it's much more expensive and we can't work out why? https://www.mothercare.com/car-seat-bases/silver-cross-simplifix-isofix-base/560908.html

    Joie seem to be the market leaders of in-car safety...?

    • We're in the process of signing up to NCT classes - these start around July.

    Thanks again for all of your replies, very helpful!
    Last edited by Shoxt3r; 23-04-2019 at 12:39 PM.
    • Munchkin84
    • By Munchkin84 23rd Apr 19, 12:50 PM
    • 385 Posts
    • 455 Thanks
    Munchkin84
    I bought a pregnancy support belt off ebay , it felt like a big hug and helped with back pain and supports the bump from underneath. Iím sure it was only around a tenner
    • NeverendingDMP
    • By NeverendingDMP 24th Apr 19, 6:14 AM
    • 339 Posts
    • 1,265 Thanks
    NeverendingDMP
    Depending on your area the midwuves may have access to physio, support belts etc. Give them a call to see if you can self refer or they need to. Its best to ring early rather than late as it can get uncomfy as baby gets bigger. I had a very nice looking tuba grip thing round my belly for a while. Ha ha
    35,213 - Jan 2018, 29692 remaining.
    Mortgage 77230- Jan 2018
    73646 remaining.
    Emergency fund 18
    Make 2019- 694.49/2019
    1% challenge. At ...somewhere in single figures again....
    • Glad
    • By Glad 24th Apr 19, 7:58 PM
    • 17,945 Posts
    • 39,870 Thanks
    Glad
    Congratulations

    take a look at 52 tips 'n' tricks to save with a baby or toddler on the main MSE site
    I'm a Board Guide on the Money Savers Arms, Discussion Time, Wales, Competitions, Marriage Relationships & Families, Health and Pet Care boards. However, please do remember, board guides don't read every post. if you spot an inappropriate or illegal post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with reportable posts). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com
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    • Shoxt3r
    • By Shoxt3r 25th Apr 19, 11:07 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 17 Thanks
    Shoxt3r
    Thanks everyone for your help! I'll create another thread about pushchairs as I think this is a much bigger topic haha
    • Shoxt3r
    • By Shoxt3r 14th May 19, 11:41 AM
    • 53 Posts
    • 17 Thanks
    Shoxt3r
    Thanks everyone for your replies!
    As you might have seen from my other post we ordered a Joie Travel System from Halfords which includes everything (we think, apart from the footmuff as the pictures aren't clear. We found we can get a compatible one from Amazon or eBay though if needed) - parents are helping us out with things thankfully

    https://www.halfords.com/kids-zone/travel-systems/travel-systems/joie-chrome-dlx-stroller-with-carrycot-and-i-level-travel-system-bundle

    Regarding cots we've had a look around Mothercare and think we've found a nice one for £50.
    We started picking up a few starting bits in Ikea too like furniture and small baby things just to get us going.

    One main question is around the feeding system (whether we decide to go down the breastfeeding route or formula), what would be the easiest solution for each?
    • mikeeboy
    • By mikeeboy 14th May 19, 3:27 PM
    • 167 Posts
    • 105 Thanks
    mikeeboy
    Couple of years yet but..... stay out of McDonalds
    • sheramber
    • By sheramber 14th May 19, 5:43 PM
    • 6,401 Posts
    • 4,816 Thanks
    sheramber
    My son and DIL have a Jack and Jill sale in their area and have used it a lot.

    People buy and sell baby items they no longer need - prams, buggies, clothes , toys etc

    There may be something similar in your area.
    • sn1987a
    • By sn1987a 15th May 19, 7:05 PM
    • 396 Posts
    • 437 Thanks
    sn1987a
    One main question is around the feeding system (whether we decide to go down the breastfeeding route or formula), what would be the easiest solution for each?
    Originally posted by Shoxt3r
    What do you mean? feeding system for the breastfeeding route??
    • fred246
    • By fred246 15th May 19, 7:55 PM
    • 1,502 Posts
    • 892 Thanks
    fred246
    The baby car seat manufacturers association must rub their hands with glee when they read this. Who's idea was it to start the rumour that there are thousands of baby car seats around that look absolutely perfect but in fact are invisibly damaged due to being involved in major accidents. I assume everyone having a baby must buy a brand new car too just in case a previous owner had a major accident in the car without leaving any signs of damage on it
    • Kynthia
    • By Kynthia 15th May 19, 8:30 PM
    • 5,481 Posts
    • 7,673 Thanks
    Kynthia
    The baby car seat manufacturers association must rub their hands with glee when they read this. Who's idea was it to start the rumour that there are thousands of baby car seats around that look absolutely perfect but in fact are invisibly damaged due to being involved in major accidents. I assume everyone having a baby must buy a brand new car too just in case a previous owner had a major accident in the car without leaving any signs of damage on it
    Originally posted by fred246
    A quick Google would have given you the reasons buying car seats new is recomended. No-one imagines lots of seats have been in major accidents but they don't have to be to be unsafe. Sample testing has shown there is a risk. I read an article where a company (not one that sells car seats) bought 10 second-hand car seats and found a number of them had been damaged, altered or no longer met current safety standards (and this is an item where you do want current standards met, if not exceeded). Also their shelf life is an issue. Car seats only have a shelf life of about 10 years due to the plastics they're made from, the wear and tear they endure, and the conditions they are stored in (cars can get very hot/cold, be in direct sunlight or stored in damp garages) so the need for the frame and straps to endure high forces can be compromised. Plus they have fairly delicate insulation which is easily damaged but for the purpose of shock absorption like cycle helmets. So even if a seat hasn't been in an accident this can degrade or be damaged by being dropped or knocked over. So if you're buying second-hand you have no idea if it's in good condition beneath the surface, been damaged or modified, or even if it's 15 years old and nowhere near the current safety standards.

    I'm all for saving money, keeping things out of landfill and not buying unecessily but I'm not skimping on car seats which can make the difference between life and death. When disposing of your old car seats you should cut off the straps to prevent others "rescuing" it from the rubbish and using it or even selling it on to an unsuspecting buyer.
    Last edited by Kynthia; 15-05-2019 at 8:52 PM.
    Don't listen to me, I'm no expert!
    • fred246
    • By fred246 16th May 19, 4:24 AM
    • 1,502 Posts
    • 892 Thanks
    fred246
    Oh dear second hand car seats must be really dangerous. They must be a major cause of childhood deaths. The other day I saw a 'walking bus' going to our local primary school. They weren't wearing helmets! How dangerous is that?
    • Sagaris
    • By Sagaris 16th May 19, 5:20 AM
    • 1,703 Posts
    • 4,823 Thanks
    Sagaris
    Oh dear second hand car seats must be really dangerous. They must be a major cause of childhood deaths. The other day I saw a 'walking bus' going to our local primary school. They weren't wearing helmets! How dangerous is that?
    Originally posted by fred246
    The can be incredibly dangerous. As a road safety officer I've seen some awful examples that people have bought to me to fit for them, hoping to save money. A 15 year old example (they are all date stamped if you know where to look) with black mould on the cover and harness, another one with the wrong harness (that was the incorrect weight limit and would never have restrained a child in a collision) and people just buying completely the wrong type of seat for their child (high backed booster that uses a seat belt to restrain the child and seat for a 10 month old). No instructions on how to fit the child in the seat or in the vehicle. They are not somewhere nice to put a child in a car, they are safety equipment, but people are very complacent and forget that.
    Almost 2 stones gone!
    RIP Clio 1.9.93 - 7.4.10
    I WILL be tidy, I WILL be tidy!
    • fred246
    • By fred246 16th May 19, 6:03 AM
    • 1,502 Posts
    • 892 Thanks
    fred246
    The can be incredibly dangerous. As a road safety officer I've seen some awful examples that people have bought to me to fit for them, hoping to save money. A 15 year old example (they are all date stamped if you know where to look) with black mould on the cover and harness, another one with the wrong harness (that was the incorrect weight limit and would never have restrained a child in a collision) and people just buying completely the wrong type of seat for their child (high backed booster that uses a seat belt to restrain the child and seat for a 10 month old). No instructions on how to fit the child in the seat or in the vehicle. They are not somewhere nice to put a child in a car, they are safety equipment, but people are very complacent and forget that.
    Originally posted by Sagaris
    My car is over 15 years old. All the seats are over 15 years old. I expect I need to replace them all. Mould is all around us. If you can see it it just means there is a lot of it there. It needs cleaning not throwing in the bin. A harness that is OK for a 5 KG baby but breaks at 20Kg? I'd like to see it. People with a bit of common sense can easily assess what would happen in an accident and if it's safe or not. I know not everyone has common sense but for those that have a second hand car seat is fine.
    • Sagaris
    • By Sagaris 16th May 19, 5:08 PM
    • 1,703 Posts
    • 4,823 Thanks
    Sagaris
    My car is over 15 years old. All the seats are over 15 years old. I expect I need to replace them all. Mould is all around us. If you can see it it just means there is a lot of it there. It needs cleaning not throwing in the bin. A harness that is OK for a 5 KG baby but breaks at 20Kg? I'd like to see it. People with a bit of common sense can easily assess what would happen in an accident and if it's safe or not. I know not everyone has common sense but for those that have a second hand car seat is fine.
    Originally posted by fred246
    We will have to agree to differ then - I'm sure 20+ years of experience and numerous training courses can't all be wrong.
    Almost 2 stones gone!
    RIP Clio 1.9.93 - 7.4.10
    I WILL be tidy, I WILL be tidy!
    • building with lego
    • By building with lego 16th May 19, 5:35 PM
    • 2,367 Posts
    • 5,752 Thanks
    building with lego
    Having had 2 babies in the space of 15 months I have had a lot of experience recently lol. My number 1 best buy would without a doubt be cheeky wipes. I absolutely hated the packs of baby wipes that you get from the shops. Im so glad I made the investment with my first child as when baby no 2 came along I just ordered a few more extra wipes. They are still going strong and my youngest is now 1. I reckon I've saved a few hundred quid in wipes alone for the 2 of them. Plus they are so much more user friendly then the horrid packet ones.
    Unfortunately for me I struggled to produce enough milk so had to switch to formula. I used aptamil with my first but then with my second I tried the aldi mamia and there was no discernible difference (except for the price).
    Originally posted by Mummy2cheekymonkeys
    If cheeky wipes are microfibre, you can make your own embarrassingly easily by simply chopping a piece of microfleece into pieces- I used it as cloth liners for nappies- keeps baby dry- and also as wipes. Bought a metre by 1.5 metres for under a fiver and they lasted two babies, were always soft, and washed easily at 40 or 60 degrees. Superb moneysaving!
    They call me Dr Worm... I'm interested in things; I'm not a real doctor but I am a real worm.
    • building with lego
    • By building with lego 16th May 19, 5:43 PM
    • 2,367 Posts
    • 5,752 Thanks
    building with lego
    ...

    One main question is around the feeding system (whether we decide to go down the breastfeeding route or formula), what would be the easiest solution for each?
    Originally posted by Shoxt3r
    Buy nursing bras instead of maternity bras- the only difference is that the cups unclip to make feeding easier once baby is actually here.

    I'd be wary of buying formula "just in case" your wife finds breastfeeding difficult at first. Imagine if she suggested a vibrator or some Viagra in the bedside table before sex, "just in case"- how would that make you feel?! (The "just in case" formula made several of my friends feel utterly worthless, for the record, and angry at their husbands for making them feel like that. Plus they felt less keen on working at learning how to breastfeed and they fed for less time than they'd wanted to, and still feel bad about it.)
    They call me Dr Worm... I'm interested in things; I'm not a real doctor but I am a real worm.
    • Kynthia
    • By Kynthia 17th May 19, 11:31 AM
    • 5,481 Posts
    • 7,673 Thanks
    Kynthia
    My car is over 15 years old. All the seats are over 15 years old. I expect I need to replace them all. Mould is all around us. If you can see it it just means there is a lot of it there. It needs cleaning not throwing in the bin. A harness that is OK for a 5 KG baby but breaks at 20Kg? I'd like to see it. People with a bit of common sense can easily assess what would happen in an accident and if it's safe or not. I know not everyone has common sense but for those that have a second hand car seat is fine.
    Originally posted by fred246
    Having common sense clearly doesn't mean people know the forces incurred by the harness restraining a 5kg child and a 20kg child in a 70 miles per hour crash are very different and what they are. Very qualified people test these seats and the law insists you use them and use the right class for the weight/height of the child so this is for good reason. Child car seats are different from the seats in your car so comparing their useful life is ridiculous. They are made of different materials, as child seats would be unaffordable if they were made the same as actual car seats, plus child seats need to be lighter so they can be moved from car to car. They are also fixed to the car very differently, permanently versus temporarily.

    I don't know why you're insisting these safety measures are unnecessary. What is your expertise.
    Don't listen to me, I'm no expert!
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