Doing it for myself....

So I updated my signatures and will start doing this at the start of the months for motivation, some figures are the same showing not paid anything but that's due to my some DD being paid from the 14th so not paid yet and the outstanding amounts from the biggies are from March not Jan, But will be easier then its done on the 1st.
Frustratingly Ive only just started this change recently and paid nearly 700 from January but its hitting home its just the tip of the iceberg, I was preliminary giving myself a pat on the back from starting this journey but in reality I should have been giving myself a kick up the backside for getting into this mess. Hindsight is fab thing eh, but I have to stay focused.
I carry my notepad everywhere now DD laughs at me, I'm writing down everything, taking wee tips from all of you and writing down my spends.
I am so eager for the 15th to roll around so I can see N Power drop off. I am also very aware I need to make some savings or an emergency pot so this is also on the radar.
I need to declutter my wardrobe my life make it as easy for me and my brood as possible. I have wardrobes of clothes I no longer need/require Nights out are no longer justified unless absolutely ness. I have not bought a thing for myself in months and it will be like that for some time. I used to spend a lot on make up but have been working through any cosmetics I already have and making do what Ive got.
My ebay/depop at the moment completely unsuccessful will retry with positive thoughts.
I can honestly say hand on heart this was not me this time last year, I now feel more responsible, enpowered and actually cringe of how much money ive wasted.
I could have been sitting pretty comfortably debt free with a nice little nest egg, but instead I'm scanning the whoopsie aisles (mark down ticket items at supermarkets) looking how to stretch my budget further to feed my brood.
Ive planted the seed to friends that I'm saving up, therefore playdates at costly places then lunches etc and events are not on my agenda at the moment but cheap wee park days are Ive also seen a decrease in the invites coming my way since I started this anyway, but that's fine infact probs for the best until I get myself in a better financial position. My question is how did I manage before, cinema trips, trips to town, lunching out frequently pub quiz nights......My answer is in my signature.........a huge pile of debt.......living like a queen for a few weeks and then no money for rest of month. I sat last night wondering how do my friends manage it, some even have more kids than me to afford their lifestyle then I thought STOP ..............it actually doesn't interest me, I'm doing this for a better life for me and my kids no one else matters....im doing this for myself so the title of my thread is fitting.
So this got me thinking what do I want to achieve when this is paid..... I actually don't know
Will put my thinking cap on and if I have an ultimate goal this me motivate me further so watch this space.

Thank you so much mummy-bear and pidg04, had a fantastic time at DS birthday I'm thrilled I managed it on budget. As of today I'm N Power free wooohooooo, it wont show on my Balance now til after 6.30 on Monday but its been paid and I'm absolutely delighted another small but sweet triumph, Now time to knuckle down and get the rest paid.

Woke up determined. Sold a jacket on gumtree for £10 which I put towards the kids lunches for the week. Made 2.47 on qmee which I transferred over to Next and a sneeky wee transfer of £4.00 to very. I would have put the £10 to one of them but I struggle with the cash in hand to electronic transfer as I have no where of getting the cash to a bank and took out all my allowance out of the bank, will need to think of a way round this as I'm using the envelope system and ive got very min in the bank so any ideas welcome as I plan to sell a few things on gumtree/villiage /spock, Listed a few more things on ebay but I never have any luck, will wait and see.