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    • ds383
    • By ds383 12th Sep 18, 9:20 PM
    • 47Posts
    • 6Thanks
    ds383
    Suspended for gross misconduct...help
    • #1
    • 12th Sep 18, 9:20 PM
    Suspended for gross misconduct...help 12th Sep 18 at 9:20 PM
    I was suspended for gross misconduct yesterday on full pay. I showed up to a written warning disciplinary meeting drunk. And now I have another disciplinary meeting for gross misconduct for being drunk in the previous disciplinary.

    Let me explain why I showed up drunk, which was a huge mistake. I have autism and anxiety issues and take medication for it and the day of the disciplinary I had unexpectedly ran out of the medication which calms me down. In a panic I decided to drink a few glasses of wine as I was finding the whole thing very stressful..I got a little drunker than I intended to, I just wanted to relax. I should have been more careful. I have issues with alcohol dependency and tend to use alcohol as a way to cope with anxious situations and I really couldn't see how I was going to get through it without something to calm me down. They didn't tell me I could have a representative with me, and the meeting was with someone I'd never met before, it wasn't my manager. They know about my alcohol and anxiety problems, btw. And they know I'm on medication for it. They also know I have autism.

    I'm worried sick and extremely remorseful. I've worked there for over 3 years and I'm very good at my job, and I really enjoy it. What are the chances of me getting fired? it's going to be near impossible to get another job with this on my file.

    When I have the actual meeting for the hearing I will be telling them that I have quit drinking and will be starting on anti-depressants. Would this help my defence?

    Thanks
    Last edited by ds383; 12-09-2018 at 9:31 PM.
Page 3
    • waamo
    • By waamo 13th Sep 18, 3:58 PM
    • 4,735 Posts
    • 6,113 Thanks
    waamo
    Good luck. Your going to need it.
    This space for hire.
    • Undervalued
    • By Undervalued 13th Sep 18, 4:01 PM
    • 3,597 Posts
    • 3,278 Thanks
    Undervalued
    But surely as an employer shouldn't they try and support and help employees who have alcohol abuse problems and not just fire them?
    Originally posted by ds383
    If you had a disability then they would be obliged to make reasonable adjustments that is all. Otherwise what they "should" do is purely a matter of opinion.
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 13th Sep 18, 4:01 PM
    • 3,918 Posts
    • 10,587 Thanks
    LilElvis
    Because when I show up for work, I work extremely hard. I do over time whenever they ask. I'm a good, valued worker, respectable and kind to everyone and I enjoy my job.They have documentation on their site about what to do with employees who have alcohol problems and it suggests helping and supporting them in their recovery?
    Originally posted by ds383
    Such a good employee you were asked to attend a disciplinary meeting for a written warning. They aren't going to be feeling all warm and fuzzy about you - far from it.
    • BoGoF
    • By BoGoF 13th Sep 18, 4:03 PM
    • 3,631 Posts
    • 2,998 Thanks
    BoGoF
    If this is a serious thread then it seems work is a trigger for your drinking as you claim not to drink on your days off.

    So it seems a change of job is exactly what you need
    • ds383
    • By ds383 13th Sep 18, 4:07 PM
    • 47 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    ds383
    It is, I don't like to work with other people. I want to run my own business and work for myself. But I can't do that without a paid job to fund the course I need to do. Albeit, I should have funded it last year.

    But the job I have right now is probably easiest on my anxiety than other jobs would be which is why I need to keep it for the time being. It's one of the few that I know I can handle. But the drinking has become a habit that I need to break.
    Last edited by ds383; 13-09-2018 at 4:10 PM.
    • lincroft1710
    • By lincroft1710 13th Sep 18, 4:18 PM
    • 11,184 Posts
    • 9,548 Thanks
    lincroft1710
    I wouldn't be worrying about my job, I'd be worrying about my liver
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 13th Sep 18, 4:26 PM
    • 5,653 Posts
    • 9,783 Thanks
    sangie595
    Ok. I am now seeing the familiar pattern of "just how much can I, as a new poster, wind this up and add more and more incredulous statements to make the idiots dance to my tune?" You are now tripping over your own lies. Resign, get sacked, get drunk, I don't care... You aren't for one minute for real.
    • FBaby
    • By FBaby 13th Sep 18, 4:33 PM
    • 17,026 Posts
    • 41,947 Thanks
    FBaby
    OP you are clearly in total denial of the impact to your company of allowing you to continue to work with the knowledge that you drink every day before going to work.

    Imagine one night you come in having had just a coupe shots extra. You stumble drunk, hit your head on a desk and die alone. Do you realise that if it was discovered at the inquest that your boss was aware of the extreme of your problem yet let you get on with your job they could potentially end up in jail? That's not even considering you making a mistake that could end up in the injury/death of a customer.

    The best you can hope for is for them to hold your re until you can agree to a drug test but you'd have to be really valued for them to consider this option.
    • mac.d
    • By mac.d 13th Sep 18, 8:23 PM
    • 688 Posts
    • 543 Thanks
    mac.d
    Ok. I am now seeing the familiar pattern of "just how much can I, as a new poster, wind this up and add more and more incredulous statements to make the idiots dance to my tune?" You are now tripping over your own lies. Resign, get sacked, get drunk, I don't care... You aren't for one minute for real.
    Originally posted by sangie595

    So can we please stop feeding someone who is clearly a wind up merchantl?
    • ds383
    • By ds383 13th Sep 18, 9:14 PM
    • 47 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    ds383
    Thanks for the replies all. Will let you know the outcome tomorrow.
    • Barny1979
    • By Barny1979 13th Sep 18, 9:23 PM
    • 4,297 Posts
    • 45,754 Thanks
    Barny1979
    Thanks for the replies all. Will let you know the outcome tomorrow.
    Originally posted by ds383
    Whatever you do, don't consider having a drink tonight or tomorrow before the meeting
    • ds383
    • By ds383 13th Sep 18, 9:44 PM
    • 47 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    ds383
    I'm definitely not. I'm going in completely sober to prove to them I've changed and have stopped abusing it - I'll still enjoy a drink on my days off. I'm going to tell them I'll agree to random drug tests at work. I desperately want to keep my job.
    • waamo
    • By waamo 13th Sep 18, 9:56 PM
    • 4,735 Posts
    • 6,113 Thanks
    waamo
    Still enjoy a drink on your days off? I guess AA wasn't much help then.
    This space for hire.
    • MovingForwards
    • By MovingForwards 13th Sep 18, 9:57 PM
    • 422 Posts
    • 508 Thanks
    MovingForwards
    You still do not get it.

    You cannot have ANY booze as you cannot control your drinking, it is part of your life and you use it as a crutch.

    Random drug testing is of no use unless you use drugs (speed/weed/coke etc) as well as drink.

    Going in with your mindset as it is will not help you.

    Your contract or a company policy will dictate you cannot drink at work, cannot attend work drunk. I have put it like this so you understand the serious problem you are in.

    You are lucky the company are going through the motions of a disciplinary as it is instant dismissal.

    So admit you have a problem, see your gp, go to AA and get your drink issue sorted.

    See your gp about the meds, or adjust the time you take them, take them after eating a proper meal.

    Once you are straightened up start applying for a job because you will not be employed tomorrow.
    • Sncjw
    • By Sncjw 13th Sep 18, 10:01 PM
    • 1,959 Posts
    • 1,152 Thanks
    Sncjw
    Going in sober one day wouldn’t convince me.

    You saying work should help you well you go to help yourself first. You have to be more proactive. If I was your employer I would want change over a longer period of time rather than a day. To me attending aa a day before meeting is iffy.

    You can only change when you truely want to not because it could save you your job.
    • Sncjw
    • By Sncjw 13th Sep 18, 10:02 PM
    • 1,959 Posts
    • 1,152 Thanks
    Sncjw
    What is it that your wanting to do as a business.
    • walwyn1978
    • By walwyn1978 13th Sep 18, 10:23 PM
    • 538 Posts
    • 507 Thanks
    walwyn1978
    No, I don't drive.

    I had more than a few glasses of wine, I had a bottle. For some reason wine gets me more drunk than vodka.
    Originally posted by ds383
    That isnít how alcohol works. A 750ml bottle of wine at 12% will have about 9-10 units of alcohol in. 13 shots of vodka although less liquid will have 13 units of alcohol in. Which will get you drunker.

    But since as others have pointed out, this story doesnít ring true....
    • chrisw99
    • By chrisw99 14th Sep 18, 11:15 AM
    • 321 Posts
    • 194 Thanks
    chrisw99
    Ok. I am now seeing the familiar pattern of "just how much can I, as a new poster, wind this up and add more and more incredulous statements to make the idiots dance to my tune?" You are now tripping over your own lies. Resign, get sacked, get drunk, I don't care... You aren't for one minute for real.
    Originally posted by sangie595
    Starting to agree with this.

    Post a photo of the disciplinary warning letter (with anything ID'ing you or the company blanked out), even just a fragment, if you want us to believe you.
    • Barny1979
    • By Barny1979 14th Sep 18, 4:57 PM
    • 4,297 Posts
    • 45,754 Thanks
    Barny1979
    What was the outcome OP?
    • ds383
    • By ds383 14th Sep 18, 6:08 PM
    • 47 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    ds383
    Downgraded to misconduct. Keeping my job
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