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  • FIRST POST
    • exlews
    • By exlews 12th Aug 18, 5:57 PM
    • 10Posts
    • 3Thanks
    exlews
    Never ending help needed
    • #1
    • 12th Aug 18, 5:57 PM
    Never ending help needed 12th Aug 18 at 5:57 PM
    Hi
    I have posted on this thread before and just when I think I have got my head around an issue something else comes to light so now I am going around in circles.

    I am around 44k in debt. I have had a terrible few years and lots of burying my head in the sand. I think Bankruptcy is my best issue but think that could create more problems..

    Firstly I am on a joint mortgage with my ex who is now married. I left 10 years ago. Signed an affidavit to say I had no interest in the property back then. Never paid a penny since. He is currently trying to get me of the mortgage. He is unaware of my financial situation. He also dislikes me so dont want him to know.

    My debts have been going up over the years. 3 years ago I was introduced to Match Betting. It started going well. I started this as a way to pay my debt then which was around 20k. Now over the last 3 years numerous payments totalling 1000s have been going in and out of my account from betting companies and also my Dad and Sister. I started Match Betting but because of other just horrible stuff going on I then somehow gambled also. This year in Feburary it all came to a head when the person I shared my house with took his own life. He had lots of problems and I didnt know how to help him.His living with me was affecting my own mental health because of the constant worry but him taking his life shocked me to the core. It was then because of the lack of his rent coming in and a few cards finishing their 0% rates that made me face up to everything.

    I am guessing if I did do Bankruptcy I will get a BRO..because of the gambling.I just dont know if the OR is able to start looking into my Dads and sister bank accounts also due to payments coming in and out of my account! They would just go totally mad at me. I owe my parents money but on a discussion last week they dont want it back but they dont know how bad things have got. They are old and dont understand stuff so dont want to worry them. I just seem stuck all ways really..its driving me crazy..

    I could probably scape together 150 a month for an IVA but really am in such a mess. Paralysed with fear...
Page 1
    • Willing2Learn
    • By Willing2Learn 12th Aug 18, 6:32 PM
    • 1,825 Posts
    • 1,410 Thanks
    Willing2Learn
    • #2
    • 12th Aug 18, 6:32 PM
    • #2
    • 12th Aug 18, 6:32 PM
    Hi exlews,

    Are you addressing your gambling?
    Have you considered that gambling could be a method you are using to cope with every day life?

    Edit: I just noticed that you first posted with this problem back in April. You seem to be paralysed with fear. You need to contact StepChange or another free debt counselling service for professional advice and support.

    See MSE listing of free debt counselling services by clicking here
    Last edited by Willing2Learn; 12-08-2018 at 7:12 PM.
    I work within the voluntary sector, supporting vulnerable people to rebuild their lives.

    I love my job

    • sourcrates
    • By sourcrates 12th Aug 18, 7:37 PM
    • 15,873 Posts
    • 14,924 Thanks
    sourcrates
    • #3
    • 12th Aug 18, 7:37 PM
    • #3
    • 12th Aug 18, 7:37 PM
    Hi,

    I would run your situation past one of the free debt charities, see what they recommend.

    You cant just scrape together money for debt repayments, you need to budget correctly and see which options fit your circumstances.

    Stop the gambling, easier said than done, granted, but if you arent already doing so, seek help on that score.

    You will only usually get an IPA if you have more than 20 disposable income.
    Last edited by sourcrates; 12-08-2018 at 9:30 PM.
    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Credit File And Ratings, and
    Bankruptcy And Living With It, boards. "I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly".
    Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an abusive or illegal post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

    For free debt advice, contact either : Stepchange, National Debtline, or, CAB.
    For Free Legal advice see : http://legalbeagles.info/
    • exlews
    • By exlews 12th Aug 18, 8:39 PM
    • 10 Posts
    • 3 Thanks
    exlews
    • #4
    • 12th Aug 18, 8:39 PM
    • #4
    • 12th Aug 18, 8:39 PM
    I have stopped gambling. Yes I see it was a way of trying to cope with other pressures in my life. I seem to have spent since April worried. I think Bankruptcy would be best but just dont want them looking into my parents accounts. Does an official receiver have authority to go into others peoples account. I am sure they would be allowed..Would they be interested? I think the same amount going back and forth into the accounts regarding those payments is probably the same.
    • sourcrates
    • By sourcrates 12th Aug 18, 9:36 PM
    • 15,873 Posts
    • 14,924 Thanks
    sourcrates
    • #5
    • 12th Aug 18, 9:36 PM
    • #5
    • 12th Aug 18, 9:36 PM
    I think you may be overthinking this a tad.

    All kinds of people go bankrupt, for all kinds of reasons, people exchange money, its nothing untoward, I doubt it would even be mentioned, and certainly would not preclude you from bankruptcy.
    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Credit File And Ratings, and
    Bankruptcy And Living With It, boards. "I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly".
    Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an abusive or illegal post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

    For free debt advice, contact either : Stepchange, National Debtline, or, CAB.
    For Free Legal advice see : http://legalbeagles.info/
    • exlews
    • By exlews 12th Aug 18, 10:27 PM
    • 10 Posts
    • 3 Thanks
    exlews
    • #6
    • 12th Aug 18, 10:27 PM
    • #6
    • 12th Aug 18, 10:27 PM
    Thank you. I am over thinking and over thinking.
    • Willing2Learn
    • By Willing2Learn 13th Aug 18, 11:22 AM
    • 1,825 Posts
    • 1,410 Thanks
    Willing2Learn
    • #7
    • 13th Aug 18, 11:22 AM
    • #7
    • 13th Aug 18, 11:22 AM
    Thank you. I am over thinking and over thinking.
    Originally posted by exlews
    If you want something else to think about then why not post your Statement of Affairs (SOA)... Just fill out the SOA form, click on the 'format for MSE' button at the bottom and post it up here.

    http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php
    I work within the voluntary sector, supporting vulnerable people to rebuild their lives.

    I love my job

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