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    • theguru
    • By theguru 8th Aug 18, 9:07 PM
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    theguru
    Phone given to a six year old?
    • #1
    • 8th Aug 18, 9:07 PM
    Phone given to a six year old? 8th Aug 18 at 9:07 PM
    Hi looking for some advice, my six year old (seven next week) has been given a IPhone (no sim) by her mother. I clearly disagree with this and always said she should not get one until she moves into senior school.

    Her mother and me are divorced and do not get on but I totally disagree with this, should I send her mother a message saying my thoughts against this, guarantee it will cause more arguments and probably upset my daughter as well if she gets it taken away.

    What would you do?
Page 3
    • FBaby
    • By FBaby 9th Aug 18, 5:30 PM
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    FBaby
    But how is having a phone with sim card in it somehow worse than having a tablet?
    I think that's the question you need to be prepared to respond to. You say she can use your ipad to play games and facetime, so what's the difference? I expect her mum is addicted to her phone, DD got used to seeing her on it and is regularly asking her to let her phone to play games. Mum got a new phone so gave her old one to DD to play these games.

    I'm sorry to say but you picked the woman to have a child with, you can't now turn her into another person who share the same values than you. Your DD will be exposed to things her mum considers appropriate whether you like it or not.

    If you want to be a good influence, make sure to arrange a lot of activities for your DD when she is with you so she doesn't feel the need to go on the phone. Tell her that when she is with you, you decide when she can play with the phone and agree on a time when she can.

    You are much more likely to get your DD not to realise that there is more than to play on a phone this way than by fighting a lost battle with her mum.
    • fibonarchie
    • By fibonarchie 10th Aug 18, 2:56 PM
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    fibonarchie
    That would be me then when I gave my 6 year old my old iPhone so I could keep in touch & call him in the evenings to see how he was after I moved out.



    Admittedly this was because if I called my ex wife's number she wouldn't answer but still....
    Originally posted by Oakdene
    Another recalcitrant ex. Seems to be a theme here

    6 is really to young to have a phone at all, let alone unsupervised
    Signature Removed by Forum Team ..thanks to somebody reporting a witty and decades-old Kenny Everett quote as 'offensive'!!
    • fibonarchie
    • By fibonarchie 10th Aug 18, 3:08 PM
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    fibonarchie
    Or listen to music, the radio or podcasts.

    Or to take photographs.

    Or to learn another language (Duolingo is excellent, and my daughter has been using Google Translate to speak to me in Spanish).

    My also daughter uses hers as the controller for her Just Dance game on the PS4.
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    ..aged 6???
    Signature Removed by Forum Team ..thanks to somebody reporting a witty and decades-old Kenny Everett quote as 'offensive'!!
    • onlyroz
    • By onlyroz 10th Aug 18, 3:26 PM
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    onlyroz
    ..aged 6???
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    My daughter is 9. She has certainly been listening to music, taking photographs and playing dance games since she was 6. Learning languages is a more recent thing.


    I was simply trying to highlight some of the reasons why a child might want to use a smart device like an iPod or phone. Not all activities are as brain-rotting as some people on this thread seem to be suggesting.
    • fibonarchie
    • By fibonarchie 10th Aug 18, 3:45 PM
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    fibonarchie
    My daughter is 9. She has certainly been listening to music, taking photographs and playing dance games since she was 6. Learning languages is a more recent thing.


    I was simply trying to highlight some of the reasons why a child might want to use a smart device like an iPod or phone. Not all activities are as brain-rotting as some people on this thread seem to be suggesting.
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    I'm gobsmacked anyone would let a small child have an iphone or tablet. It's far too young, imo, though whether it's any worse than just dumping them in front of the tv for hours on end is probably a moot point.

    What really takes the biscuit is stuff like this
    https://www.amazon.com/CTA-Digital-iPotty-Activity-Seat/dp/B00B3G8UGQ
    I mean, how irresponsible and clueless would you have to be to give that to a toddler!! And they wonder why our kids have screen addiction and mental health issues..
    Signature Removed by Forum Team ..thanks to somebody reporting a witty and decades-old Kenny Everett quote as 'offensive'!!
    • sheramber
    • By sheramber 10th Aug 18, 4:45 PM
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    sheramber
    What can you do if the child is living with her mother? You won't be able to control what happens in that home, especially if your and you ex do not agree.
    • onlyroz
    • By onlyroz 10th Aug 18, 8:18 PM
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    onlyroz
    I'm gobsmacked anyone would let a small child have an iphone or tablet. It's far too young, imo, though whether it's any worse than just dumping them in front of the tv for hours on end is probably a moot point.

    What really takes the biscuit is stuff like this
    https://www.amazon.com/CTA-Digital-iPotty-Activity-Seat/dp/B00B3G8UGQ
    I mean, how irresponsible and clueless would you have to be to give that to a toddler!! And they wonder why our kids have screen addiction and mental health issues..
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    You are gobsmacked at a 6-year-old listening to music or learning about photography? Really? What about apps that help teach times tables?
    • glentoran99
    • By glentoran99 10th Aug 18, 9:12 PM
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    glentoran99
    and letters, colours, numbers, shapes, nursery rhymes,



    My daughter has been able to count and recognise numbers up to 20 since she was 2,



    To put it in context she starts nursery soon and they ask can she count to 5
    • fibonarchie
    • By fibonarchie 11th Aug 18, 8:08 PM
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    fibonarchie
    You are gobsmacked at a 6-year-old listening to music or learning about photography? Really? What about apps that help teach times tables?
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    and letters, colours, numbers, shapes, nursery rhymes,

    My daughter has been able to count and recognise numbers up to 20 since she was 2,
    Originally posted by glentoran99
    Sorry, but

    Is there anything people can do these days without having to resort to a computer to assist them..

    We were taught letters, numbers, nursery rhymes by people. You know.. living breathing human beings. That's something kids are lacking now, as harried parents are plonking them down in front of a tablet computer while they get on with other (presumably more important) things.

    Computers have enabled the terminally stupid to become even more dysfunctional, in many ways.
    Signature Removed by Forum Team ..thanks to somebody reporting a witty and decades-old Kenny Everett quote as 'offensive'!!
    • meer53
    • By meer53 11th Aug 18, 8:54 PM
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    meer53
    What a complete oxymoron.

    You cultured your daughter from the age of 6 into using a phone and now you say that there is nothing you can do about being on her phone 24/7?
    Originally posted by NineDeuce
    I didn't "culture" my daughter into using a phone, she used it to keep in touch with either me or her Father. She had a Nokia 3310 at the time. I also didn't say i had an issue with her being on her phone all the time. You made that assumption, incorrectly.

    She's a sensible, intelligent 18 year old who is about to go to University to take a Teaching degree so using a phone hasn't done her any harm.
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 11th Aug 18, 9:14 PM
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    Mojisola
    Is there anything people can do these days without having to resort to a computer to assist them..

    We were taught letters, numbers, nursery rhymes by people. You know.. living breathing human beings.
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    When a computer is used to assist learning, what's the issue?

    We used to learn by making letters in a sandtray, then with chalk on a slate, then with a pencil on paper, later on using pens.

    Now we use an electronic device as part of the learning process.

    I remember the outcry when our school decided to allow the use of biros instead of fountain pens - some adults thought that was clear evidence of the decline in civilisation!
    Last edited by Mojisola; 11-08-2018 at 9:29 PM.
    • onomatopoeia99
    • By onomatopoeia99 11th Aug 18, 10:58 PM
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    onomatopoeia99
    Sorry, but

    Is there anything people can do these days without having to resort to a computer to assist them..

    We were taught letters, numbers, nursery rhymes by people. You know.. living breathing human beings.
    Originally posted by fibonarchie

    The old ways are the best, then?
    INTP, nerd, libertarian and scifi geek.
    Home is where my books are.
    • jimbo747
    • By jimbo747 11th Aug 18, 11:16 PM
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    jimbo747
    I let my 6 year old daughter play on my phone but she now has her own kindle, plays a variety of games and books. limited to an hour a day. Her social skills are excellent, maths above average but her reading ability is what is expected for a child starting juniors. She loves reading books and I don't think using a tablet has had any negative impact. She is way beyond what I was at her age in all areas, and as with everything, having things in moderation is the key.
    • glentoran99
    • By glentoran99 12th Aug 18, 8:16 AM
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    glentoran99
    Sorry, but

    Is there anything people can do these days without having to resort to a computer to assist them..

    We were taught letters, numbers, nursery rhymes by people. You know.. living breathing human beings. That's something kids are lacking now, as harried parents are plonking them down in front of a tablet computer while they get on with other (presumably more important) things.

    Computers have enabled the terminally stupid to become even more dysfunctional, in many ways.
    Originally posted by fibonarchie


    My daughter knows more nursery rhymes than me, Of course I teach all those too but when uses correctly, and they are also used in nurserys and schools now you know, phones and tablets are a brilliant aid to learning.
    • onlyroz
    • By onlyroz 12th Aug 18, 9:40 AM
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    onlyroz
    Sorry, but

    Is there anything people can do these days without having to resort to a computer to assist them..

    We were taught letters, numbers, nursery rhymes by people. You know.. living breathing human beings. That's something kids are lacking now, as harried parents are plonking them down in front of a tablet computer while they get on with other (presumably more important) things.

    Computers have enabled the terminally stupid to become even more dysfunctional, in many ways.
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    Perhaps we should go back to farming with scythes then? Or sending letters in the post rather than emails or texts. Let's ban online banking while we're at it too.

    What's the problem with using technology as an aid to learning? Having my child practice times tables with an app doesn't mean that I can't or won't help her practice in other ways.

    Sure, there are issues with too much screen time, but electronic devices are not the instruments of pure evil that some people on here are making them out to be.

    As an example I run a robotics club for 8-11 years olds where we (shock horror) use tablets and phones to program robots to do various tasks. Occasionally we also have a bit of fun too, if that's allowed these days...
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Aug 18, 9:54 AM
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    Mojisola
    phones and tablets are a brilliant aid to learning.
    Originally posted by glentoran99
    Sure, there are issues with too much screen time, but electronic devices are not the instruments of pure evil that some people on here are making them out to be.
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    Agree - most parents will use them as just another tool - bad parents will use them as a way of keeping kids quiet.

    It's not the tool that's the problem, it's the inadequate parents - and it isn't the tool that makes them bad parents - they have existed in every generation!
    • fibonarchie
    • By fibonarchie 12th Aug 18, 11:31 AM
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    fibonarchie
    Perhaps we should go back to farming with scythes then? Or sending letters in the post rather than emails or texts. Let's ban online banking while we're at it too.

    What's the problem with using technology as an aid to learning? Having my child practice times tables with an app doesn't mean that I can't or won't help her practice in other ways.

    Sure, there are issues with too much screen time, but electronic devices are not the instruments of pure evil that some people on here are making them out to be.

    As an example I run a robotics club for 8-11 years olds where we (shock horror) use tablets and phones to program robots to do various tasks. Occasionally we also have a bit of fun too, if that's allowed these days...
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    Ooh, I seem to have hit a raw nerve. Why would that be, I wonder..

    Dumping kids in front of screens isn't (and will never be) good for them. This must of course mean that we need to go back to 'farming with scythes..' (though granted, a bit of physical exercise wouldn't hurt a lot of people.. )
    Signature Removed by Forum Team ..thanks to somebody reporting a witty and decades-old Kenny Everett quote as 'offensive'!!
    • meer53
    • By meer53 12th Aug 18, 11:45 AM
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    meer53
    Ooh, I seem to have hit a raw nerve. Why would that be, I wonder..

    Dumping kids in front of screens isn't (and will never be) good for them. This must of course mean that we need to go back to 'farming with scythes..' (though granted, a bit of physical exercise wouldn't hurt a lot of people.. )
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    Who is "dumping their child in front of a screen" ? The majority of parents are responsible enough to limit their childs exposure to anything they feel isn't constructive or could possibly be harmful. But of course those parents are never in the press are they ?
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Aug 18, 11:47 AM
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    Mojisola
    Dumping kids in front of screens isn't (and will never be) good for them.
    Originally posted by fibonarchie
    I don't think anyone on here will disagree with that.

    Using technology as another tool to aid learning and to have fun is a completely different thing.
    • iammumtoone
    • By iammumtoone 12th Aug 18, 11:55 AM
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    iammumtoone
    I don't see the issue its not a phone. Without the SIM its an ipod/tablet.

    My son had a second hand ipod when he was young (can't remember the exact age). Reason being I didn't want his apps on my phone. There were rules it was set up under my account and passworded so I had to download all apps, he was only allowed educational games and the ipod was not allowed upstairs (he is now 11 and has his own phone but the rules still apply the phone is not allowed in his bedroom and I still have to put in a password for new apps).

    Having his own had it benefits, when were out he couldn't just 'borrow' my phone and play on it like you see some children as his ipod never left the house.

    Whether we like it or not children will start to use technology earlier (they have ipads at schools in reception). I don't see the difference if they are using parents tablets or their own, its the time they are allowed to spend on them thats important not who they belong to.
    Last edited by iammumtoone; 12-08-2018 at 12:24 PM.
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