Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • Forest11
    • By Forest11 7th Aug 18, 10:13 AM
    • 36Posts
    • 4Thanks
    Forest11
    Executours dont want to deal with a beneficary.
    • #1
    • 7th Aug 18, 10:13 AM
    Executours dont want to deal with a beneficary. 7th Aug 18 at 10:13 AM
    Have an existing thread but i think its become too long to get fresh replies.

    My dad is one of the beneficiaries for his parents estate. No will. His brother has been non contact for many years due to his mental health condition making him abusive and violent. My dad and the other beneficiaries don't wish to have any contact with him - the solicitor dealing with it has written to his local authority twice who have passed the letters on to him but no response.

    The solicitor recommended that their become trustees for him or for it to remain at the solicitors but they absolutely do not wish to do so so instead they will go to the court of protection and get permission for it to be paid in to the court - only the initial barristers fees will come from their share the rest will come from his share.

    Does that sound legally sound - or will the court of protection reject it and say those dealing with the estate must remain the legal protectors of the money - in which case I am not sure how things will develop.
Page 1
    • BrassicWoman
    • By BrassicWoman 7th Aug 18, 11:07 AM
    • 1,694 Posts
    • 6,978 Thanks
    BrassicWoman
    • #2
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:07 AM
    • #2
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:07 AM
    I think your options have been covered extensively already

    https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5832719
    Jan 18 grocery challenge 105.13/ 150
    • Gers
    • By Gers 7th Aug 18, 11:37 AM
    • 6,588 Posts
    • 42,504 Thanks
    Gers
    • #3
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:37 AM
    • #3
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:37 AM
    Have an existing thread but i think its become too long to get fresh replies.
    Originally posted by Forest11
    Why do you need 'fresh replies'? All the good advice has already been given to you.
    • Sunny Intervals
    • By Sunny Intervals 7th Aug 18, 11:48 AM
    • 59 Posts
    • 262 Thanks
    Sunny Intervals
    • #4
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:48 AM
    • #4
    • 7th Aug 18, 11:48 AM
    When I was an Executor, there were all kinds of things I didn't want to do (including dealing with a difficult beneficiary), but I had to do them anyway because that was part of the role.
    • Forest11
    • By Forest11 7th Aug 18, 1:14 PM
    • 36 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Forest11
    • #5
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:14 PM
    • #5
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:14 PM
    Because things have changed and I am not sure if the solicitor is telling them correct advice - and if the barrister comes back and says it will cost a lot more from the everyone's share or the court of protection might reject I need to be prepared for the reaction of my dad.
    • Forest11
    • By Forest11 7th Aug 18, 1:16 PM
    • 36 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Forest11
    • #6
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:16 PM
    • #6
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:16 PM
    You probably didn't have to deal with someone who had been a toxic presence for years and you are probably mentally stable yourself - my dad is not and is an aggressive person to cope with when he feels he has been wronged.
    • Sunny Intervals
    • By Sunny Intervals 7th Aug 18, 1:24 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 262 Thanks
    Sunny Intervals
    • #7
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:24 PM
    • #7
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:24 PM
    Wrong and wrong (they were very toxic and I was very ill). And if your dad is being aggressive toward you, leave him to it and let him take his own legal advice.
    Last edited by Sunny Intervals; 07-08-2018 at 1:27 PM.
    • Forest11
    • By Forest11 7th Aug 18, 1:28 PM
    • 36 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Forest11
    • #8
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:28 PM
    • #8
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:28 PM
    I cant as he asks me for advice and I don't give what pleases him he turns on me.
    • Sunny Intervals
    • By Sunny Intervals 7th Aug 18, 1:33 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 262 Thanks
    Sunny Intervals
    • #9
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:33 PM
    • #9
    • 7th Aug 18, 1:33 PM
    Then it sounds like the brother isn't the only one in the family who is toxic. You don't have to put up with that kind of behaviour. Do you live with your dad?
    • Forest11
    • By Forest11 7th Aug 18, 2:03 PM
    • 36 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Forest11
    Yes and due to my autism I can't move out.
    • Sunny Intervals
    • By Sunny Intervals 7th Aug 18, 2:14 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 262 Thanks
    Sunny Intervals
    There was a young autistic man who posted on the Disability board a while back. He was living with his mother, who was very controlling and was taking advantage of him financially. He accessed support through social services and I believe he was moving into sheltered accommodation.

    Would you consider posting there to get some advice on getting out of this situation? Being disabled doesn't mean you should have to put up with people being aggressive toward you.
    • Malthusian
    • By Malthusian 8th Aug 18, 11:27 AM
    • 4,465 Posts
    • 7,095 Thanks
    Malthusian
    Yes and due to my autism I can't move out.
    Originally posted by Forest11
    If your autism makes it difficult to cope with your father's toxic behaviour then you have more reason to move out, not less. I agree with Sunny Intervals.
    • gettingtheresometime
    • By gettingtheresometime 8th Aug 18, 11:50 AM
    • 3,906 Posts
    • 9,888 Thanks
    gettingtheresometime
    There was a young autistic man who posted on the Disability board a while back. He was living with his mother, who was very controlling and was taking advantage of him financially. He accessed support through social services and I believe he was moving into sheltered accommodation.

    Would you consider posting there to get some advice on getting out of this situation? Being disabled doesn't mean you should have to put up with people being aggressive toward you.
    Originally posted by Sunny Intervals
    I think there was a poster on this board that had a very similar problem - unfortunately I can't remember the poster's name.
    Lloyds OD / Natwest OD / PO CC / Wescott / Argos Card cleared thanks to the 1 debt v 100 day challenge


    Next on the list - JD Williams
    • motorguy
    • By motorguy 8th Aug 18, 1:46 PM
    • 17,115 Posts
    • 10,254 Thanks
    motorguy
    I cant as he asks me for advice and I don't give what pleases him he turns on me.
    Originally posted by Forest11
    Then next time he asks tell you him you wont be giving him advice as the advice you give never pleases him and he turns on you.
    "We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem."
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

130Posts Today

1,439Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • Ta ta... for now. This August, as I try and do every few yrs, I'm lucky enough to be taking a sabbatical. No work,? https://t.co/Xx4R3eLhFG

  • RT @lethalbrignull: @MartinSLewis I've been sitting here for a good while trying to decide my answer to this, feeling grateful for living i?

  • Early days but currently it's exactly 50 50 in liberality v democracy, with younger people more liberal, older more? https://t.co/YwJr4izuIj

  • Follow Martin