Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 3rd May 18, 9:55 AM
    • 500Posts
    • 1,234Thanks
    efes shareholder
    taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be
    • #1
    • 3rd May 18, 9:55 AM
    taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be 3rd May 18 at 9:55 AM
    Good morning MSE'ers
    I have been reading diaries for the last few months and have found peoples stories so inspiring that I am hoping for some company on my own journey , this will be my own log which hopefully will motivate me at times of bleakness so I can look back on any progress I have made
    My sitituation is quite unique , My long term relationship broke down 7 years ago and i spent the next 6 renting on the private market and looking after my 3 kids on just the one income.
    This , ultimately led to lots of juggling , credit facilities being utilised and to be accountable for myself poor choices.
    I'm now hoping I can turn this round - my credit file is rated as poor however I a share of the property purchased as the family home ( my children now all over 18 reside there when they are not at uni) and one day this will be sold and i need to be in a position to reinvest this money and acquire a property of my own
    I recently received a part payment of the equity ( around 5%) and have used this to take responsibilty for my historic debts and settle the accounts on my file which show in default
    This was as follows
    899.52 - Argos store card
    1799 - M&S Credit card ( passed to Lowell)
    I also paid my overdraft off to the tune of 1500 and a 1000 from my credit card
    I have around 3554 remaining on my credit card ( which i have stopped using) and also 880 on Very ( approx 450 on 0%)

    I have placed around 5000 in to my esavers account and i would like to build this , I would like to tackle my remaining debts without dipping in to this as its my safety net should I ever need legal action to get my share of the house once the kids are more established

    Historically I have lived for the moment and as long as the cash machine continued to distribute then I would continue to withdraw , I've enjoyed trips away that I knew I couldn't afford but I looked upon life as when we leave , we are only taking our memories so it is best to make some whilst our health allows

    At the grand age of 45 , having spent my years from 18 parenting I want to start fulfilling my bucket list however I need to do this without over committing myself !!!

    This is my introduction , I will hopefully post an SOA at some point later today

    Thank you all for reading
    Last edited by efes shareholder; 03-05-2018 at 9:58 AM. Reason: ommited info
Page 21
    • Kitten868
    • By Kitten868 12th Apr 19, 8:28 PM
    • 1,181 Posts
    • 2,951 Thanks
    The great weather is doing wonders for the flowers so could it be hayfever - me and my clan are bad with it. But it could be the dust at your mums or the dog?
    I recommend cetirizine. 30 tablets for 1 in poundland. Oh and the neilmed sinus rinse. It's a bit gross but for a brilliant reason xxx
    Loan 1 4900/8000
    Loan 2 2900/5800
    Total 7800/13800 43% PAID

    And CC 1250/1900
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 14th Apr 19, 1:53 PM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    HI Kitten - I've reinstated the air purifier in my room and this seems to have helped a lot - I think its something in my living space but at its worse it didn't matter where I woke up , I was still suffering.
    Thanks for the tips , I will check them out.

    Last few days have been very spendy - I feel like this months budget was a pipe dream and certainly that my tapping of the c/c I clear each month is having a derogatory effect.
    It short , I've lost focus and the wheels have come off a bit.
    There is simply more month this month then there is money - There are a few factors but the main one is I have to get my eye back on the ball.

    I still have a 70th and 21st to cater for , I have just got the bill for e March from my credit card and its not so bad and I can see this is an area I have to stop giving myself extras on , so.........the reminder of the month and the 70th and 21st will be covered from savings and the card will be removed from my purse and banished and as time passes and pay packets come in the budget will be back on track.

    Its so easy done and I am not helping myself with where I want to be - Its a habit I was very wary off and now I can see why.
    I am clearing it each month but the realisation is , this money is then gone from the following months budget and we are back to square one.
    I have 6k stashed away in bonds ( with an extra 50 in wins) and an emergency fund of around 1k which is my floating balance in my current account.
    I am going to clear my "spending" card this month and not use it again and use the EF to cater for the additions - If I don't have the card this will right itself as typically some months are more expensive then others.

    The reality is that I am not yet cutting my cloth tight enough and I need to
    The vaping is a huge help and my motoring costs are lower , I've trimmed my social calender and all of the birthdays after this month are done until August.
    I need to get back in control
    Having my EF in with my current account for the 5% interest is not really helping the way it should so come pay day this month I will putting this back in to the savings pot of my account , adding to it hopefully and moving my available budget for the month in to my monzo account as that is available money

    Blimey , being a grown up is tough at times , particulary this month where its difficult to know where the money has gone too - Off the top of my head , the repair to the car paintwork , my holiday balance are two factors - I didn't help myself yesterday by buying a wind deflector for the car however I've been on the look for one and they generally retail at around 160 and I've picked this one up for 55 via gumtree.
    Its going to be very handy when I do my girls weekend next month as it will mean we can have the roof back for the journey and still have our belongings under with the seats down and it will make the driving experience much more comfortable on the sunny days where there is still a cold wind.
    If I don't use it as much as I thought I can sell it on and not be out of pocket.
    Did I need it ? Its probably not essential , Did I want it ? Yes !
    I also want a dashcam but I think I am going to have to lower my requirements on this and maybe revisit it in July but the beast is due its MOT
    Last edited by efes shareholder; 14-04-2019 at 2:05 PM.
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 14th Apr 19, 2:08 PM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    Also to add , I think I have found the gym.
    Its 16.99 a month with no contract and round the corner from work
    Its also open 24 hours and most importantly it has showers !!!!

    My local leisure centre where I go aqua want 40 a month and a 12 month contract - I don't really want to be tied in to that so I think I will go to the place local to work and dump the weekly aqua class or just go sporadically
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 15th Apr 19, 10:56 AM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    Stepping in to Monday a little shocked and a little stunned and giving myself a massive kick up the backside

    As i said last night , this months salary has kind of obliterated however today the reality of how much kicks in.
    i've written down every spend , accounted for every payment and aside from the wind deflector which wasn't a must have , there are no reckless spends there are however some catch up historic spends

    I need to get back on the boat but it feels like paddling a canoe upstream - I'm a little perplexed that despite knowing it was a heavy month , its as heavy as it is

    I have no option but to use the EF as a contigency plan and make more effort to get this budget working
    The budget doesn't work when it includes historic spends and i think the fall guy of this will be the EF which I will have to replace

    Cancelling anything ( including aqua aerobics ) other then the family birthday things this weekend but inclined to carry on with the intended gym membership , My chosen one is on the doorstep at work and is 16.99 a month with 15.00 joining fee ( one off ) and no contract compared to the leisure centre which is 47.00 a month , min 4 month contract and 40.00 one off

    I don't know whether to join or wait - I am thinking it will give me some focus and something to do ( along with keeping me clean !! )

    I need to give myself a pep talk and realise that despite this set back I am making progress - 13 months ago there would have been no EF , it would have been straight in to the overdraft
    Although I've been tapping the card , it has been paid off and not added to the debt
    The bills are all paid , with over the minimum payment
    There are no longer any defaults on my account
    My son owes me 55.00 which right now I could really do with !!

    I have made progress and I am learning - in the last half hour I have had an invitation to a weekender in July which my friend is attending , I have been the last 3 years and love it however I didnt book it for this year as it was one of the things I decided to forego
    she has just texted and asked if I want to take the place of someone who has now decided they can't afford to go
    I paused and thought about it , however I know it doesn't help the situation so I declined

    It seems so long until pay day now but I have to chuck it in the bucket and get back on this horse , it could be a lot worse !
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 16th Apr 19, 1:47 PM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    so the gym membership is activated - however it did mean that card needed to be tapped as this is how the first months payment is taken

    As part of the membership I am able to take people with me so I am dragging the bestie along to join in with me and hopefully she will join

    Its not a great month but I've been talking about it so long that I needed to bite the bullet and just do it , and I am hoping that healthy body will in turn present a healthy mind

    No spends yesterday or today and none planned - oh no just remembered 80p in the vending machine for Coke at work as I have forgotten my large water bottle today.

    I have a tub of pennies at home - I am thinking of taking these and cashing them in as the month is that appalling that it may be needed.
    I've just done an order at work that brings a 22 quidco payment but unfortunately it won't bring it yet.

    My son cannot send his payment until his loan hits in a few weeks but thats not the be all and end all - I just need to get by this month very very sensibly or as sensibly as I can at this stage and improve my management from here on in
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 17th Apr 19, 2:10 PM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    Happy hump day people

    So the Gym is joined and tonight is the first induction and I feel like the new kid at school.
    I could quite easily wimp out and go home right now but I have my kit so I'm going to put my big girl pants on and go !!

    No spends today but I need some birthday cards , I am inclined to try and go to the card factory at the weekend as their cards will be far cheaper.

    Nothing to report in the financial world , I have moved my EF or the remainder of it from current account and left myself a small balance to hopefully see me through the next 13 days

    My wind deflector has arrived just in time for the sunshine and was fitted to my car in my lunch break - hopefully I have some sunglasses somewhere in the car and I will saviour the journey home in the sunshine - VIA the gym.

    I have a busy weekend but I am perked up that my friend who moved away last summer is coming home for a girls night out for our friends birthday.
    I wasn't sure if I would go but my wing women and I have not had a night out in nearly a year so I absolutely will.
    On recent nights out it has felt like something was missing and it took me a while to realise that it was her absence I am feeling so I'm looking forward to seeing her for alcahol minus her husband who I do love dearly but some nights you don't want the boys coming to play too

    I may have to take my hip flask in my bag to keep the spends down on this one !!
    • efes shareholder
    • By efes shareholder 18th Apr 19, 10:31 AM
    • 500 Posts
    • 1,234 Thanks
    efes shareholder
    So I went to the Gym , I realised just how poor my general fitness has become
    I think this may be a long process
    I did some rowing and the cross trainer and that was about my lot

    I've bought my kit to work but I think I will go to aqua aerobics instead tonight
    I feel quite stiff so hopefully it will loosen the limbs up a little

    Taking my best mate to the gym tomorrow as I'm allowed a buddy and again on Monday all being well

    Realised that each visit is going to cost me a 1 in the car park so depending on how many times I go that itself could get quite costly

    Until my general fitness improves or the summer is over I am going to stick with my aqua but maybe not go every week

    In other news , payday seems so so far away , I'm using the wait to remind myself of my goals and consider all ways to achieve them.

    I have made lots of changes but I haven't yet got a grip on the budget or got it working for me
    I feel like I am just shifting things around but not making any huge progress............mind you refusing the weekender was progress for me
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

29Posts Today

1,833Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • Have a great Easter, or a chag sameach to those like me attending Passover seder tomorrow. I?m taking all of next?

  • RT @rowlyc1980: A whopping 18 days off work for only 9 days leave! I?ll have a bit of that please......thanks @MartinSLewis for your crafty?

  • RT @dinokyp: That feeling when you realise that you have 18 days of work and only used 9 days of your annual leave! Thanks @MartinSLewis h?

  • Follow Martin