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  • FIRST POST
    • james_uk
    • By james_uk 15th Apr 18, 12:51 AM
    • 35Posts
    • 1Thanks
    james_uk
    Worried about money, any advice?
    • #1
    • 15th Apr 18, 12:51 AM
    Worried about money, any advice? 15th Apr 18 at 12:51 AM
    Hi, me and my partner have a baby who is starting nursey soon (few months away).
    We both work full time and in the unfortunate position that we do not have any support, both our parents are not in a position to mind our baby and friends / family aren't either due to either working themselves or just not being able to.

    We are thinking the baby would have to go to nursey full time, the cost of this appears like its going to be around £800 - £900, then when you factor in all the other things we would have to pay for like additional travel, i am about to start driving to help so the extra insurance etc.. we are basically looking at it all costing more or less the same as what i actually earn per month.

    At the moment we have a mortgage etc and both of us usually have no additional money spare at the end of each month and i am getting really worried about how we will afford this.

    I am assuming we would qualify for tax free childcare but that only brings it down a little?

    Is there anything else we could looko at or may qualify for?

    Its mad because i wouldn't class us as poor but when you more or less take away my whole monthly wage, i just dont know how that can be justified that childcare can cost nearly the same as what i get paid.

    Obviously we will have to try and cut back on a lot of things, but when we both have nothing spare now then to need about an extra £1000 per month just seems mad.

    It has got both me and my partner so worried, i dont know how others seem to do it, there are people that are a lot worse off than us and they appear to get by fine.

    If anyone can give me any advice that would be great.

    Thanks

    James
Page 1
    • FBaby
    • By FBaby 15th Apr 18, 6:53 AM
    • 16,625 Posts
    • 41,184 Thanks
    FBaby
    • #2
    • 15th Apr 18, 6:53 AM
    • #2
    • 15th Apr 18, 6:53 AM
    Don't panic. You'll be surprised when you get down to it that you can make it work, the thing is that you need to accept that indeed, you'll have to change your lifestyle and probably have to make some cuts.

    Firstly, you need to work out what you might be entitled to if both of you work FT, and then you will need to decide whether it is worth both of you continuing to work FT. Normally, you shouldn't be worse off, but might find that you are only marginally better off, maybe by £100-£200 a month and you then need to decide whether this is worth it. Maybe decide that it isn't, but you need to factor in the impact of stopping to work vs gaining experience on your future career so that this £100 might become -£500 vs £500 in 5 years time.

    If you decide that one stop working, you'll have to accept that it comes with some inevitable compromises, for instance, giving up the car, moving to a cheaper area etc...

    Either way, you'll make it work if you budget properly.
    • Woolco
    • By Woolco 15th Apr 18, 10:30 AM
    • 21 Posts
    • 78 Thanks
    Woolco
    • #3
    • 15th Apr 18, 10:30 AM
    • #3
    • 15th Apr 18, 10:30 AM
    Sorry I can't answer your question, but reading about your situation it does seem SO unfair.
    • suki1964
    • By suki1964 15th Apr 18, 10:48 AM
    • 10,878 Posts
    • 28,929 Thanks
    suki1964
    • #4
    • 15th Apr 18, 10:48 AM
    • #4
    • 15th Apr 18, 10:48 AM
    Sorry I can't answer your question, but reading about your situation it does seem SO unfair.
    Originally posted by Woolco
    Why is it so unfair???

    Should nursery workers not get paid a living wage?


    Op, child care is expensive, very much so, as it should be. Many moons ago I worked with a nurse who was actually working for free as all her wages went to the crèche plus a bit more, this was long before CTC, WTC, childcare vouchers etc, but she done it as her career meant she had to if she wanted to progress.

    These are the tough decisions couples need to make when deciding to have a child

    My own daughter gave up full time work and took a small cleaning job that fits around her husbands shift and relies on the CTC and family allowance to make up the short fall. She doesn't have a career and once little one starts school in September she will be back looking for a full time job

    If either you or your partner aren't on the career ladder perhaps this is something one of you could do, leave work and become a stay at home parent, working evenings or weekends to make up the short fall

    End of the day, when children come along, cuts have to be made

    The old style board is a great place to get ideas on how to stretch the budget
    if you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
    • Woolco
    • By Woolco 15th Apr 18, 11:09 AM
    • 21 Posts
    • 78 Thanks
    Woolco
    • #5
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:09 AM
    • #5
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:09 AM
    Why is it so unfair???
    Originally posted by suki1964
    Err because people have children and then come on here and say money it tight. Like money was not a priority at the time. Now it is.
    • maisie cat
    • By maisie cat 15th Apr 18, 11:18 AM
    • 377 Posts
    • 440 Thanks
    maisie cat
    • #6
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:18 AM
    • #6
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:18 AM
    Every couple who plans a family will have the same decisions to make, childcare is rightly expensive. What has changed from when you planned to have a child and looked at the financial impact?
    For many the decision on whether one partner should continue working really depends on career. Giving up work for a while and caring for your own child maybe cost effective in the short term, but may damage career prospects later.
    When I gave up full time work I calculated that I saved around £900 a month in costs related entirely to working including work lunches, petrol & car costs, dry cleaning, food bills mostly as we reduced the reliance on convenience options. You will need to put a budget together to work out which option is better for you both financially and career wise.
    • suki1964
    • By suki1964 15th Apr 18, 11:29 AM
    • 10,878 Posts
    • 28,929 Thanks
    suki1964
    • #7
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:29 AM
    • #7
    • 15th Apr 18, 11:29 AM
    Err because people have children and then come on here and say money it tight. Like money was not a priority at the time. Now it is.
    Originally posted by Woolco

    I missed the sarcasm
    if you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
    • Begsey
    • By Begsey 15th Apr 18, 12:02 PM
    • 23 Posts
    • 10 Thanks
    Begsey
    • #8
    • 15th Apr 18, 12:02 PM
    • #8
    • 15th Apr 18, 12:02 PM
    With us, it worked out better for the wife to take a career break. We had twins, and although family were willing to help, we felt it would have been too much to ask of them.
    She went back part time when they went to nursery, and full time when they went to school.
    Have a play about with the tax credits calculator. I didn't think we would be able to claim anything, but it was surprising.
    Incase you've not used it before.
    https://www.gov.uk/tax-credits-calculator
    • w06
    • By w06 15th Apr 18, 5:48 PM
    • 534 Posts
    • 811 Thanks
    w06
    • #9
    • 15th Apr 18, 5:48 PM
    • #9
    • 15th Apr 18, 5:48 PM
    If it's any reassurance I'm a member of a few professional fora and even couples where both are on a good wage have these worries, with the whole of one person's wage often going on childcare.

    It's only for a few years and times will get easier as they go to school. You'll likely surprise yourselves how much you can reduce expenditure without major impact on your lifestyle.
    • Darksparkle
    • By Darksparkle 15th Apr 18, 6:15 PM
    • 4,997 Posts
    • 3,256 Thanks
    Darksparkle
    Regarding help available, what is your household income?

    Have you considered a childminder rather than a nursery? We found it's about £200-300 cheaper per month (we use a mix of both).

    Does your employer offer childcare vouchers?
    • cantcope
    • By cantcope 16th Apr 18, 12:35 PM
    • 1,703 Posts
    • 1,264 Thanks
    cantcope
    the fact childcare costs almost your monthly wage is because the childcarer will want to earn a monthly wage too.
    i used a childminder was almost £1000 per month. i got childcare vouchers from work via salary sacrifice which saved some tax but for the first few years things were really tight. It was worth it though, i had adult conversation, moved along in my career gaining a rise etc, my child blossomed around other children.
    things now seem amazing that he is 5, in school, childcare is a LOT less (jsut before and after school now) and we have money left over for treats and holidays (i am single now too so even less money coming in!)
    If i'd stopped work rather than pay childcare i'd still have had no money but now be job hunting, around school hours, on a much lower wage with a 5 year gap in my employment history. 5 years in an office is 5 years worth of technology changes and updates i'd have no idea about.
    Definitely worth looking at the bigger picture rather than how much money you'll have x
    Good luck with whatever you decide.
    my eyes are like mirrors. They reflect whats going on around me rather than whats inside
    Original debt May 06 £16569,25th Feb 08 DEBT FREE

    Last bet : 26th October 2006
    • haras_nosirrah
    • By haras_nosirrah 16th Apr 18, 5:59 PM
    • 1,419 Posts
    • 2,624 Thanks
    haras_nosirrah
    I would agree 're whether staying at work for long term gain is better

    Friend of mine was a teacher and took a career break when her daughter was born.

    5 yrs later her daughter is at school and she cannot get a teaching job for anything. The curriculum has moved on and to go back she would need to retrain but can't afford to do it.

    Had she stayed in teaching part time she would have been employable now.
    I am a Mortgage Adviser
    You should note that this site doesn't check my status as a Mortgage Adviser, so you need to take my word for it. This signature is here as I follow MSE's Mortgage Adviser Code of Conduct. Any posts on here are for information and discussion purposes only and shouldn't be seen as financial advice.
    • Sncjw
    • By Sncjw 16th Apr 18, 6:10 PM
    • 1,705 Posts
    • 1,027 Thanks
    Sncjw
    Do you not hve family that can help out even if it!!!8217;s a few days a week to reduce your childcare costs
    • Darksparkle
    • By Darksparkle 16th Apr 18, 7:25 PM
    • 4,997 Posts
    • 3,256 Thanks
    Darksparkle
    Do you not hve family that can help out even if it!!!8217;s a few days a week to reduce your childcare costs
    Originally posted by Sncjw
    OP already said that wasn't an option. Not an option for most parents I know either as most parents still working.
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