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    • Concernedretiree
    • By Concernedretiree 13th Apr 18, 12:39 PM
    • 6Posts
    • 0Thanks
    Lifetime or payoff mortgage
    • #1
    • 13th Apr 18, 12:39 PM
    Lifetime or payoff mortgage 13th Apr 18 at 12:39 PM
    My husband retired last year at 68. He has substantial pension provision which he has not touched which is worth 3 times the equity we hold in our home. We are relying on our joint savings to live on. My only income is a small private pension worth only 20 per week. He is a deeply controlling man and has made it very difficult for me to work even though I had a good career when we met. He has now said he has no intention of paying off the mortgage and wants to get a lifetime mortgage of 150,000. The equity is about 250,000. We have 5 children; 2 each from previous marriages in their 40s and one who is a post grad student. My deep fear is that if I predecease him he will change our mirrored wills and leave out my children from previous marriage or if he predecease me I will have a large debt I have no means to pay off if he leaves his pensions to his children.

    My question is - would it be better to get a lifetime mortgage and keep his investments intact or pay it off. We currently pay 220 per month and he is insisting investments will make more than that.
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    • Concernedretiree
    • By Concernedretiree 17th Apr 18, 6:51 PM
    • 6 Posts
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    Husband could have paid off the mortgage in previous house if he had chosen to but he put every available penny into his pension. The first house we had was a New town corporation house which I lived in with my 2 children and which he moved into. Once we married and bought it became a jointly owned property. 36 years on, I could not even afford this house now. As for my children, one lives with his family on the other side of the world though all lived close by before I was forced to move.
    • Brynsam
    • By Brynsam 17th Apr 18, 8:19 PM
    • 1,820 Posts
    • 1,342 Thanks
    Please - stop posting on here in the mistaken belief that somehow somebody will be able to help you. Only you can do that (a comment meant in the kindest possible way).
    • atush
    • By atush 19th Apr 18, 3:17 PM
    • 17,497 Posts
    • 11,004 Thanks
    See a solicitor promptly
  • jamesd
    Husband could have paid off the mortgage in previous house if he had chosen to but he put every available penny into his pension.
    Originally posted by Concernedretiree
    That's normally a good financial move because you get tax relief on the pension contributions and that increases the amount available later. It's part of why I have an interest only mortgage myself.

    Not paying off seems like something done by his choice, not necessity, downsizing to a lower value property. Also often an excellent financial move.

    In purely financial terms for a single person he seems to be making good financial decisions.

    But he isn't a single person and doesn't seem to be including you in the decisions but rather acting to isolate you and increase his control over you. What you have been describing is a financially and otherwise abusive relationship where the best prospects for improving your life and the prospects of your children appear to involve leaving the marriage.
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