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    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 1st Apr 18, 3:23 PM
    • 254Posts
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    mumblingtaff
    All change..... Determined to be solvent, single and successful
    • #1
    • 1st Apr 18, 3:23 PM
    All change..... Determined to be solvent, single and successful 1st Apr 18 at 3:23 PM
    Hello!
    I think this is my third diary - I posted regularly for a long time a year or two ago and then life just got in the way and my focus changed.
    So much has happened recently that I think a new start and a record of my successes and hiccups will help to keep me on track.

    So, what's changed...? Well, I'm on the senior leadership team at a large secondary school, live alone with an ancient fat little dog and am in the process of becoming single again after 5 years. My OH became my boss in September and its been downhill since then really, I won't bore you with the details but it's not been great and I finally broached it with him last week and he hasn't spoken to me since ...... Not the reaction I'd hoped for but perhaps expected.
    Earlier this year, I was passed over for a job that I've been doing informally for almost a year and that didn't help matters and have finally found the gumption to start applying for new jobs. That didn't go down well with OH either but he encouraged me to at the time of the original job issue, don't think he thought I would. I've found the work situation really difficult as nobody knows the real reason I didn't get the job and now it's at the point that I don't want to be there anymore.

    On top of that, I had some health news that stopped me in my tracks in February - I have the breast cancer gene and have a one in three chance of developing it in the next 8 years.... The hospital have been great and there's a prevention and monitoring plan in place including taking tamoxifen (not lovely side effects but better than cancer!) and lots of screening, but if I'm honest, it's made me reevaluate life a bit.
    Add to that lot that my dad has prostrate cancer that may have spread ( new biopsies soon to confirm ) and the worry that brings (my mum is useless and my sister has disabilities and with the best will in the world still needs care) and I've just had to say enough is enough - I'm 46 and things need to change, life is too short!!

    So to sum up.... Relationship going down the swanny, need a new job, health needs serious attention and family all need looking after.

    So a new start..... Here we go!! Xx
    Last edited by mumblingtaff; 01-04-2018 at 3:26 PM.
Page 3
    • joeyjimbles
    • By joeyjimbles 9th Apr 18, 2:19 PM
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    joeyjimbles
    Hello, been wondering about you off and on, and wished you a much happier time than you've clearly been having. But your plans sound really productive and positive and I know you like a plan.

    So sorry to hear about your Dad and your own health issues. Lots of empathy there as we are dealing with two parents with cancer issues, and both OH and I have some niggling ongoing health things too. Like you I've overhauled the diet and we've started the Couch to 5K together though I also go to a women's running group for all ages, experiences etc.

    I'm glad you're planning your holidays too - I remember that you love them. I also think they do you a lot of good since you find it hard to relax at home/work. Sending lots of good thoughts.
    Last edited by joeyjimbles; 09-04-2018 at 2:25 PM.
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 9th Apr 18, 2:57 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    No way MeandO!! Spooky! I've just put all the new bedding on and it looks lovely - surprising how a new few bits and pieces make such a difference. Did you buy anything?
    And talking about talking to strangers, I spoke to a lady at fat club that I didn't know and congratulated her on her big loss this week - she looked chuffed to bits that someone had acknowledged her achievement - nice to have made her day by a simple conversation. I should make the effort more often - perhaps it will pay me back one day?
    Listened to a couple of podcasts on the walk and in the car earlier - some really interesting ones, including the moneybox podcast and one on motivation and making decisions and another on being happy and positive. Every little helps hopefully.

    Just back from a nice long walk in the sunshine with the dog to the shops to buy a few fresh things - going to try really hard this week to lose at least 2.5 more lbs.

    The hairdresser also rang to offer me a cancellation tomorrow (I was booked for Thursday) - I had been considering just having my fringe cut and dyeing it myself but was looking at it this morning and it really does need a good sorting out. It will make me feel better about myself and I'm trying to improve my self esteem and confidence (people that know me would be surprised that I struggle with that sometimes) and I won't have the time when I'm back in work so I'm going. I have budgeted for it so it's not an unexpected expense but I was thinking about saving the money instead.

    Really looking forward to running club tomorrow - I'm really getting into it now. Good for me in lots of ways.
    Feeling quite positive today
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 9th Apr 18, 2:59 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Hello, been wondering about you off and on, and wished you a much happier time than you've clearly been having. But your plans sound really productive and positive and I know you like a plan.

    So sorry to hear about your Dad and your own health issues. Lots of empathy there as we are dealing with two parents with cancer issues, and both OH and I have some niggling ongoing health things too. Like you I've overhauled the diet and we've started the Couch to 5K together though I also go to a women's running group for all ages, experiences etc.

    I'm glad you're planning your holidays too - I remember that you love them. I also think they do you a lot of good since you find it hard to relax at home/work. Sending lots of good thoughts.
    Originally posted by joeyjimbles
    Hi Joey! Thank you for popping in! How's is your running going? It's tough at the start but does get easier!
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 9th Apr 18, 7:48 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Decided to stay in tonight as I'm a bit tired and the dog seems a bit under the weather - think he's getting a bit old for long journeys, they take it out of him and it will do him good to sleep at home tonight (he's been away from his bed for 4 days now). Will try to get him to the vet tomorrow if he's no brighter.
    Spoken to OH and he's ok with it, offered to come round but I think a quiet night all round would be better.

    Have decided to get a few easy niggly jobs out of the way whilst I'm watching TV - have just applied for a new driving licence online, mine was an old paper version and literally in pieces. It cost 20 which I thought was fairly reasonable.
    I've also gone through the banking and reconciled outgoings with what's left over - should be fine until the end of the month. I'm not really drinking so big boozy nights out won't factor in spending.
    My haircut, the dogs haircut, his tablets and groceries are all budgeted for and squirrelled away in a different account so I won't spend the money
    Socially, I have a book reading to attend on Friday evening but that's already paid for. Hopefully, if the weather is ok I'm going for a big walk somewhere on Saturday so that's a trip out for this week, it's running club tomorrow evening and Sunday morning (only 2 so will hardly break the bank) and I don't have any big plans apart from working weds-fri this week doing revision sessions from 9-12.30 for the year 11 students (I get paid extra for this but it's hardly anything after tax and I put the money straight into the holiday account).

    Still need to get my passport sorted - will pick up a form tomorrow when I get my hair cut. I also need to do a bit of paperwork from the old car and ring the insurance company and then that's all outstanding admin sorted out and I'm all organised.
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 9th Apr 18, 8:33 PM
    • 1,686 Posts
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    redofromstart
    Congrats on the 3.5. Absolutely with you on taking the time to be nice to random people. Makes the world round you so much more positive too
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 10th Apr 18, 7:57 AM
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    mumblingtaff
    Morning all! It's a really wet, miserable day here - pouring down. Not really looking forward to the dog walk, will be quite a short one and then hopefully it will dry up a bit later and we can go again.

    I'm having my hair sorted this morning - about time too, it's desperate. Looking forward to looking and feeling better. Whilst I'm out and about, I'll pop in to the post office for a passport form and get some new photographs done (after the haircut!).
    I need to do some work this afternoon and then it's running club at 6.30 (hope it's stopped raining by then) and then I'll see OH this evening. So a pretty busy day.....

    I didn't sleep brilliantly last night, seemed to toss and turn quite a bit. I had a little afternoon snooze for about an hour so maybe that's the reason? Don't normally sleep during the day so will try to avoid it.
    I did start a new book last night - an old Val McDermid novel that I hadn't read before. I like her writing, usually good stories with a twist and easy to read. I actually met her at a book signing and Q and A session last year - she was fab, a really interesting down to earth woman and she very kindly signed a book for my sister and wrote her a lovely message when I explained about my sister's situation and disability. She's the sort of person you could listen to for hours and clearly very comfortable in her own skin, she doesn't care what anyone thinks about her - good for her!

    Right, enough procrastination, better get the waterproofs on and get the dog out.....
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 10th Apr 18, 12:48 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Hair sorted - 70 but budgeted for and it looks much better now, made my next appointment while there too. Also popped into B&M for toiletries and a few bits - the bathroom stuff should last a couple of weeks and all needed, been running down supplies to use things up and almost at the end of everything.
    Picked up a passport application from the post office - it costs a fortune for a passport now! 93 if you take it back to the post office for checking!!!

    Going to have some lunch, do some work and take the dog out at tea time before going to running club, it's freezing and wet so will have to make myself go, I'll enjoy it once I'm there
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 10th Apr 18, 5:38 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Managed to sit down and do 3 hours of work - feel a bit more organised now. Have a to do list of work related tasks and a vague idea of when to do them. There's plenty to be going on with back to earth with a bump....

    Just walked the dog whilst it's dry for a change and am about to get changed to go to running club, at least it's stopped raining for now.
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 10th Apr 18, 8:16 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Back from running club and waiting for tea to cook - I bloody love it!! Who'd have thought that I'd actually enjoy running - think it's meeting new people that have no connection to work or OH and that I'm seeing myself improve every time.
    I'm just sorry I didn't do it earlier.

    Just going to watch telly, eat some food and read my book - at work in the morning so need to get to bed at a respectable time
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 11th Apr 18, 6:55 AM
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    mumblingtaff
    Morning all! Woke up at 5.30 this morning but did feel like I'd slept better. Have done an hour of work already this morning while waiting for it to get light, getting back into it now.
    Today's plan is to go for a big walk with the dog (who seems much better thankfully), get showered and go to work until lunchtime doing revision sessions for year 11, then perhaps go for a run if it's not pouring down and do a couple of hours work this afternoon at home.
    I have a couple of admin jobs and household things to get sorted this afternoon too so plenty to do.
    Right better get out with the dog and start the day properly......
    • MeandO
    • By MeandO 11th Apr 18, 8:58 AM
    • 1,398 Posts
    • 6,761 Thanks
    MeandO
    I wish I could be one of those people who enjoy running - I did once train for and complete a half marathon but I'm afraid the running bug never bit me!

    Have a lovely day, hope the weather's nice for you, it's grey and torrential back here today.
    Mortgage Feb 2015: 102,000 Mortgage now: 76,535
    2018 OP's: J:129.26 F:287 M:150 A:157.31 M:164.19 J:0/150
    Emergency Fund: 1000/5000
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 11th Apr 18, 12:44 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    I wish I could be one of those people who enjoy running - I did once train for and complete a half marathon but I'm afraid the running bug never bit me!

    Have a lovely day, hope the weather's nice for you, it's grey and torrential back here today.
    Originally posted by MeandO
    I think if I ever finished a 10k I'd hang up my trainers! Well done on the half marathon - very impressive!!!

    It's 12.30 and just got home - about half of year 11 turned up so a fairly productive morning, will be doing it all over again tomorrow.
    Have put a load of washing on and will have some lunch then think about doing a run. Need to de-flab - it won't shift itself
    Then more work.....
    • kerron7
    • By kerron7 11th Apr 18, 1:11 PM
    • 250 Posts
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    kerron7
    Well done on the running, I wish I could but years of netball have taken its toll on my knees!
    25.02.17 - 20,810.73
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    05.04.18 - 18,118.08

    Emergency Fund - 1/500
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 11th Apr 18, 6:28 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Decided against a run this afternoon as a new friend from running club texted me and suggested we go for a run tomorrow after she finishes work. We seem to have clicked and have a lot in common so why not?
    Part of the reason for joining the club was to meet new people so I guess it's working!

    Did some work this afternoon, pottered around the house a bit, did a bit of cleaning, walked the dog and have just had a soak in the bath. OH has invited me to his house this evening, he's cooking for me - seems to still be making an effort......

    No big unplanned spends this week so far so the budget is still under control. Only work in the morning and the run with the friend on the agenda for tomorrow so that should stay the same, fingers crossed.
    • joeyjimbles
    • By joeyjimbles 12th Apr 18, 12:46 PM
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    joeyjimbles
    That's great that the running is both therapeutic and social.
    I'm still plodding along - it's nice to run with OH as it's good to do something active together, and we keep each other going, and I love my running mum group as they're so inspiring and fun. I have no long distance plans however, this is just to do something different for exercise.
    I gave up my gym membership when I was getting rid of a debt a few years ago and there was only one class - which admittedly I did 3-4 times a week - that I missed. I've looked around and can't find anywhere that just does pay-for classes so I'm trying to buy a couple of DVDs but I'll miss the class atmosphere and getting in the zone of the exercise class where you just (try to) do what they say.
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 12th Apr 18, 1:21 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Hi Joey, I'm useless at exercise classes, I just don't have the coordination, whatever everyone else is doing I'm doing the opposite
    It's so expensive too - my local leisure centre does pay as you go classes but even those are 6-7 a go.

    Been to work this morning, educating the masses Had a meeting whilst there too so quite a productive morning.
    My work friend asked me if I'd like to go to the cinema tonight too but I've already committed to running with my new running friend so can't go - it seems it's all or nothing! Like buses.....feast or famine..... But at least I'm being invited to do things now, I must be looking more accessible these days

    Didn't sleep brilliantly at OHs last night so feeling a bit weary today but have things to do so will just get on with it. Can have an earlyish night to catch up.
    Going to do a bit of house tidying, an hour or two of work and walk the dog and meet up for running at 6.30. I'd like to cook something properly today too, maybe a spaghetti bolognese with quorn to use up some veg in the fridge. I usually make tons so there should be a couple of portions for the freezer for when I'm back at work and come home starving and eat the nearest thing - it might make me stick to the diet better too.
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 12th Apr 18, 9:49 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Been for a run with new running buddy and we ended up going for a coffee afterwards - she's really easy to talk to, is going through some difficult times in her relationship too and we seem to have a lot in common. Another positive has come out of making the effort to join the club

    Working again tomorrow morning but no big plans after that. Will try to be home by 1pm - fingers crossed I can escape at a reasonable time.
    Diet has gone well today - good job really as I had some wine last night so need to compensate for that..... I didn't have too much, just 3 medium glasses, but I could feel it this morning and it's made me realise that not drinking makes me feel better. I've really cut right down over the past two weeks and haven't really missed it. Hope I can keep it up when I'm back at work and don't slip back into the "glass or two after a hard days work" habit.

    My work friend texted today too and asked if I'd like to go out soon for a meal and few drinks again - we did it a couple of weeks ago and I really enjoyed myself so will definitely repeat it. It seems that all of a sudden I'm developing an independent social life away from OH and it's a really positive feeling. I'm making progress....
    • MeandO
    • By MeandO 13th Apr 18, 9:02 AM
    • 1,398 Posts
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    MeandO
    Loving your last post MT, the postivitity shines through. xx
    Mortgage Feb 2015: 102,000 Mortgage now: 76,535
    2018 OP's: J:129.26 F:287 M:150 A:157.31 M:164.19 J:0/150
    Emergency Fund: 1000/5000
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 13th Apr 18, 2:37 PM
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    mumblingtaff
    Loving your last post MT, the postivitity shines through. xx
    Originally posted by MeandO
    Thank you MeandO! Feeling quite positive

    Been to work from 8.30-1.30 this morning, had meetings all morning and got a lot done. Need to write it all up over the weekend - lots of boring number crunching but necessary.....
    It's been pouring down all morning so I feel like I haven't wasted any "good holiday" time. It's stopped now but really damp out - will take the dog for a big walk later for some fresh air.

    Need to make a list of things to do this weekend so here goes...

    1. Type up year 11 data doc -done
    2. Type up year 10 data doc - done
    3. Create new year 7-9 data doc - done
    4. Create some yr 11 revision resources - done enough for this comings week
    5. Write review doc - done
    6. Hoover and dust - done
    7. Clean bathrooms - done
    8. Hoover out car - done and car washed it too
    9. Do grocery shopping - done
    10. Do run on Friday/Saturday - done 4.5km
    11. Running club Sunday morning - done
    12. 2 loads of washing - one load done so far
    13. Get work clothes ready
    14. Cancel dog haircut - done
    15. Get photographs taken
    16. Send off passport and driving licence paperwork
    17. Clean wooden floors - done
    18. Get old car valeted- car wash man can do it on Monday, dropping off tomorrow
    19. Phone mum - done
    20. Try to finish new book
    21. Tidy out car boot
    22. Buy new foundation (nearly empty) -]done
    23. Cut grass if it ever dries out - done
    24. Batch cook something - done
    25. Clean fridge and microwavedone fridge
    26. Job application


    Hmmm....when you write it all down it looks like loads!!! Will do my best to get through it all - good job I like being busy....
    Last edited by mumblingtaff; 15-04-2018 at 9:01 PM.
    • mumblingtaff
    • By mumblingtaff 14th Apr 18, 7:52 AM
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    mumblingtaff
    Morning!
    Had some really strange vivid dreams last night - kept waking me up so feeling a bit weary this morning. Never mind, I'm sure I'll be fine once I get going. Was supposed to see OH but he cried off so I stayed in, watched TV and went to bed with my book. He texted about a million times last night afterwards so I'm not sure what's going on there? Whatever it is I'm not letting it change my plans or affect my day and mood.

    Have a lot to do this weekend (just look at the list!) so need to be organised. Will start the day with a dog walk in the park and will pop into sainsburys for some groceries as its very close to the park. Then, on the way home, I'll Hoover out the car and put petrol in and see if they can valet the old car.
    That will tick off a couple of jobs from the list. Will decide on the next tasks after they're done.....
    Right, better get changed and get cracking!
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