Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 22nd Mar 18, 5:44 PM
    • 2,779Posts
    • 9,212Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Old style as an escape from the world?
    • #1
    • 22nd Mar 18, 5:44 PM
    Old style as an escape from the world? 22nd Mar 18 at 5:44 PM
    Everything seems to be driving me crazy right now - the house is cluttered and disorganised (too much stuff in a small house) so cleaning takes longer than it should and it never looks "done" plus so much in the house needs work that it way out of budget. Plus my job is getting more stressful (more responsibility, minimal pay, increasing violence) so I want to run and hide!

    I would love to come home to a tidy house - not minimalist as I am a bit of an old lady in my tastes and like candles, cushions, flowers ....... doilies! And to actually have time to bake and sew and garden ...... things that I love but am terrible at.

    Anyone turned their home into an old style retreat from the world?

    I am working on minimising stuff around the house but I get twitchy if we have less than 16 loo rolls and I like to have plenty of tinned food in the cupboards ..... all organised and labels facing front. I blame that on my Gran ....... she always panicked about running out of stuff - must have been living through the war.

    Any tips on decluttering and / or making a home cosy on a budget / or managing to fit old style in around general life?

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 17-05-2018 at 10:07 AM.
    If you love life, life will love you back.
Page 6
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 8th May 18, 7:55 AM
    • 2,779 Posts
    • 9,212 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Family have taken another emotional chunk out of me this week...not good. Offloading all their problems onto me, as if I have a magic wand to sort everything out. I'm not even the one that their decisions are going to effect!!! - and as far as I can tell, they haven't spoken to them!!
    Originally posted by Sea Shell
    It is a difficult role isn't it!! I end up in the counselor role even at work. Somehow everyone seems to tell me everything and I am such a worrier. x
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 8th May 18, 11:42 AM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    I am not doing too badly! The house ......... well still plenty of decluttering to do there but I have a cleaning routine that I am trying to stick to. Plus I am working on not feeling guilty for having a 30 minute sit down to read a book as I LOVE to read! I also treated myself to some baking equipment that I can't wait to use and am also working on sorting the garden! x
    Originally posted by Angel_Jenny
    Angel_Jenny, ‘not doing too bad’ - I would say you are doing extremely well You MUST never feel guilty doing something you love I would bet that you feel recharged I look forward to reading about your baking exploits - you might manage to instil in me a desire to bake fancy decorated cakes again

    Keep up the good work & I hope you post a little more often

    MrsSD
    • mardatha
    • By mardatha 9th May 18, 6:53 PM
    • 15,199 Posts
    • 147,332 Thanks
    mardatha
    Just found this thread in the middle of a bad week. Magic thank you all!! When severely stressed or miserable I definitely retreat into the year 1881. I do things they did then, like do a menu plan . Do proper real old fashioned meals; bake a cake and/or make pudding; and visualise meself as the Lady of the House.. the Heart of the Home.
    Instead of a wee ratty hassled tired old bat
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 9th May 18, 8:27 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    mardatha, I laughed so much I fell off my chair reading those last two sentences

    Thank you for brightening up my day

    MrsSD
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 15th May 18, 9:29 AM
    • 2,779 Posts
    • 9,212 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Just found this thread in the middle of a bad week. Magic thank you all!! When severely stressed or miserable I definitely retreat into the year 1881. I do things they did then, like do a menu plan . Do proper real old fashioned meals; bake a cake and/or make pudding; and visualise meself as the Lady of the House.. the Heart of the Home.
    Instead of a wee ratty hassled tired old bat
    Originally posted by mardatha
    I baked a cake yesterday as I was stressing myself out. Normally when I get stressed and in an over thinking / worrying mood I just sit and get deeper into it. I am working on better ways to deal with it as worrying constantly is so draining x
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • maryb
    • By maryb 15th May 18, 10:09 AM
    • 3,890 Posts
    • 48,268 Thanks
    maryb
    I also bake cakes when stressed. Back in the day, when I was working and hated my job I would occasionally, when things were particularly bad, bake bread. It was the only bit of my giving-up-work-and-staying-home fantasy that I could actually put into practice. Dh always knew things were particularly bad when he saw me baking bread!! Now we have a breadmaker I have had to find other ways of letting him know I am stressed. I manage!
    It doesn't matter if you are a glass half full or half empty sort of person. Keep it topped up! Cheers!
    • mardatha
    • By mardatha 15th May 18, 8:15 PM
    • 15,199 Posts
    • 147,332 Thanks
    mardatha
    I don't tend to be stressy for long- very rarely. But I do get ratty lol, usually at my own health stopping me doing what I want to. But it doesn't last long - because stress uses up energy and I haven't got any to spare!
    Had a great day yesterday in the garden, awful one today, so tomorrow I'm going to do a big pot of stew for the freezer, an Eve's pudding, and a sultana cake - for a household that eats low-carb that's quite enough
    Currently reading the wartime diary of a Mrs Miles and realising how lucky we are- they were struggling to find even boring food back then ..
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 18th May 18, 12:51 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    Hi everyone,

    Hope you are doing well and that the bakers among you are having lots of de-stressing time in the kitchen

    DB & DH are off in the hired van taking DSis’s furniture & belongings to my house. DH returning by plane on Monday, last of the cleaning & tidying & sorting out of officialdom on Tuesday & setting off on Wednesday to be back in London Thursday evening

    Looking forward to feeding the birds, seeing the squirrels & being able to pop out for milk 24/7

    MrsSD
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 20th May 18, 8:41 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    I forgot something - I am really looking forward to using my kitchen - it might be small but I won’t need my hiking boots to get from one end to the other and once the oven is on it gets nice & warm!

    MrsSD
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 28th May 18, 1:46 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    Where is everyone?

    The weather has been so hot since we got back that I haven’t wanted to cook but I am keeping the kitchen tidy & clutter free

    MrsSD
    • LameWolf
    • By LameWolf 28th May 18, 2:04 PM
    • 10,786 Posts
    • 118,631 Thanks
    LameWolf
    Where is everyone?
    Originally posted by Mrs Salad Dodger
    Well I for one have been busy cleaning. That's my go-to occupation when stressed (I loathe cooking/baking, so that wouldn't work for me); it's called rage-cleaning on the Flylady thread. I seem to be doing a lot of it lately.
    LameWolf
    If your dog thinks you're the best, don't seek a second opinion.
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 28th May 18, 3:55 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    Well I for one have been busy cleaning. That's my go-to occupation when stressed (I loathe cooking/baking, so that wouldn't work for me); it's called rage-cleaning on the Flylady thread. I seem to be doing a lot of it lately.
    Originally posted by LameWolf
    LameWolf, sorry to hear that RL is so stressful Mind you I suppose rage-cleaning would do me some good - help me declutter a few lbs rather than baking & adding lbs
    Sending you (((hugs))) and hoping that RL settles down.

    MrsSD
    • GreyQueen
    • By GreyQueen 28th May 18, 6:44 PM
    • 12,092 Posts
    • 233,138 Thanks
    GreyQueen
    My stressbuster is allotment gardening and that's where I spend virtually every spare hour at this time of year.

    Was chillaxing with a lottie pal and a bottle of wine for part of it. If very stressed, I get out something called a mattock (very heavy duty pick-axe style too) and use it to dig up something bad and difficult, such as brambles.

    Being in a strop really helps power the effort and you can imagine all sorts are on the receiving end of mightly blows with cold steel.
    Every increased possession loads us with a new weariness.
    John Ruskin
    Veni, vidi, eradici
    (I came, I saw, I kondo'd)

    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 31st May 18, 10:51 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    GreyQueen, ‘mattocks’ to you too What a great stress buster

    Four large bags of donations delivered to cs today & now the wm is on its third load today DSis is having to rewash the load from Tuesday as she is allergic to my washing liquid

    It is slow going on the decluttering front but slow & steady wins the race

    How’s it going Angel_Jenny ?

    To a Simpler & stress free life

    MrsSD
    • kboss2010
    • By kboss2010 1st Jun 18, 8:44 PM
    • 1,076 Posts
    • 8,523 Thanks
    kboss2010
    (Hun)) kettle on, feet up, and breathe.........

    Modern life is making millions of us exhausted, stressed and unhappy. We're surrounded by images of perfection; perfect cakes, perfect homes, angelic children, perfect peachy a**ses, pensioner celebrities with the bodies of twenty-somethings, post-partum bodies snapping back into litheness in about 2.5 weeks......... some of these people should be hunted down and smacked across their smug faces.

    In this fantasy world everything is pefectable; your home, your relationships, your baking , your gardening, your garments and grooming, everything should be a work in progress, sleep is for wimps, yadda yadda yadda until the end of time.

    Be a rebel. Call time on overscheduling.

    The Skiver's Charter;

    1. If you can get out of something, do get out of something.

    2. No is a complete sentence. It doesn't require any qualifying companions. Learn to say No, I don't want to without shame.

    3. Just because some people like baking, and baking is popular, doesn't mean you have to be one of them. My involvement with cakes is that I enjoy eating them. Not enough to bake the be88ars, it must be said, but there you go, that's what shops are for.

    4. If you can afford to hire out things, do so. Plenty of people need and want to make a bit of money on the side. By becoming an employer, you are aiding the redistribution of wealth and this is a Good Thing.

    5. Only garden if you really like it. Otherwise, it's just outdoor housework. With slugs, in many cases, which one seldom finds indoors, IME.

    6. If 16 rolls of TP is your comfort zone, that's good. Buy an 18 pack and then buy another as soon as you start it, then you know you're good.

    7. Armageddon Cupboards are no bad thing.

    8. Accept good enough. And spend less time watching TV or FaceAche or Instaboring or whatever, and just say to yourself My name is Angel_Jenny and I'm an ordinary person, and I'm OK with that.

    If that doesn't work, there's always gin.
    Originally posted by GreyQueen
    GQ, I love you!
    "I want to be a glow worm, A glow worm's never glum
    'Coz how can you be grumpy, when the sun shines out your bum?" ~ Dr A. Tapping


    I'm finding my way back to sanity again... but I don't really know what I'm gonna do when I get there
    ~ Lifehouse
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 4th Jun 18, 7:16 AM
    • 2,779 Posts
    • 9,212 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    I am not doing too badly but I think I am having a mid life crisis! It was my birthday at the weekend and I am overthinking about where I am in life and what I have achieved x
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 4th Jun 18, 2:15 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    Belated birthday greetings Angel_Jenny My one question - Are you a generally happy person? I generally find that I get better results when I don!!!8217;t overthink but it has taken me a loooong time to get there

    Glad to see you on the Daily Thread - really nice people

    MrsSD
    Last edited by Mrs Salad Dodger; 07-06-2018 at 12:38 AM. Reason: Spelling
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 10th Jun 18, 1:32 PM
    • 2,779 Posts
    • 9,212 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Belated birthday greetings Angel_Jenny My one question - Are you a generally happy person? I generally find that I get better results when I don!!!8217;t overthink but it has taken me a loooong time to get there

    Glad to see you on the Daily Thread - really nice people

    MrsSD
    Originally posted by Mrs Salad Dodger
    Thank you!

    Oh I try to be! My worrying / over thinking is something I have always done. I guess I don't feel worthy of nice things happening to me and live in fear that people see the real me! x
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • Mrs Salad Dodger
    • By Mrs Salad Dodger 10th Jun 18, 2:04 PM
    • 1,014 Posts
    • 11,721 Thanks
    Mrs Salad Dodger
    Thank you!

    Oh I try to be! My worrying / over thinking is something I have always done. I guess I don't feel worthy of nice things happening to me and live in fear that people see the real me! x
    Originally posted by Angel_Jenny
    Angel_Jenny, you are worthy of nice things From your posts you sound like someone who needs some confidence in yourself We are all human & life is too short to let other people grind us down. I know it will sound a bit trite - but if YOU generally LIKE YOURSELF then stuff what other people think May I suggest one thing - when something nice happens to you just say out loud (if possible) I DESERVE THIS & I AM GRATEFUL THAT (insert nice thing) HAS HAPPENED If you can remember to do this it will become gradually easier & eventually your first thought will be I Deserve This (insert nice thing)

    I look forward to reading future posts & don’t forget we are here to listen & lean on if required. We also dispense ‘virtual (((hugs)))’ So here is a (((hug))) to be going on with

    MrsSD
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 10th Jun 18, 3:41 PM
    • 12,580 Posts
    • 174,489 Thanks
    MrsLurcherwalker
    You can only BE yourself and be the best self you can make of yourself, no one could ask more than that and anyone expecting more than your best is asking for the moon. It took me many unhappy years to get to that acceptance and when I stopped trying to be what everyone else thought I should be I began to understand me! now I do the best I can and try never knowingly to do unkind or wrong things to anyone including me. I have learned too that NO is sometimes the right answer, it's not easy but gets easier with use does NO. If you know inside that you have tried as hard as you can then you can look this judgemental world in the eyes and say I've done all I can and hold your head up and walk on unbowed M'dear! if the world doesn't like it.....just too bad! xxx.
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

507Posts Today

6,563Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • RT @Dora_Haf: @MartinSLewis So many people on here saying they're great until you get your PROPER job. What if Your proper job Is ON zero?

  • RT @hslt88: @MartinSLewis I?m a trustee for a youth charity. We only have a limited pool of funds for flexible youth workers for holiday sc?

  • RT @Dan_i_elle_88: @MartinSLewis Loved working zero hour agency care work. Never out of work and I loved having the flexibility! Only left?

  • Follow Martin