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  • FIRST POST
    • zml
    • By zml 21st Feb 18, 5:13 AM
    • 72Posts
    • 19Thanks
    zml
    Separation advice
    • #1
    • 21st Feb 18, 5:13 AM
    Separation advice 21st Feb 18 at 5:13 AM
    My husband has decided he no longer wants to be married after 24yrs, we’ve been together 33yrs in total living together for 30yrs. I do not want this so it is not a mutual split however I can do nothing to change this so I now need to start sorting stuff out.
    We have 2 children, 21and 19 both living at home. 21yr old works full time, 19yr old is about to do A levels with a view of going to university in September.
    We both work full time with similar salaries, both have similar pensions, very little assets other than the marital home.
    I have asked my husband to move out which he has duly done and for now I am living in the marital home with the children, he is still paying his share of the bills.
    I would like to see the house sold and the profit split 50/50, and we just go our separate ways. Other than a car to sort out and a few shares there is very little asset wise to sort out.
    I would imagine we will separate with a view to divorcing at some point in the future.
    Is there anything else I need to consider? I really want to keep this as simple and straightforward as possible so I can move on and repair my broken heart.
Page 1
    • dogcat
    • By dogcat 21st Feb 18, 6:02 AM
    • 21,244 Posts
    • 23,784 Thanks
    dogcat
    • #2
    • 21st Feb 18, 6:02 AM
    • #2
    • 21st Feb 18, 6:02 AM
    Oh dear, so sorry....you must be heartbroken. Not much advice really...just didn!!!8217;t want to read and run. Best to keep it amicable if possible ( although it can sometimes be very hard to do this). I hope you are ok, try and keep busy. Best thing to do from my own experience is to go out occasionally and have some fun....it!!!8217;s very easy to feel low at times like this....I know as I!!!8217;ve been through something similar.
    • chesky
    • By chesky 21st Feb 18, 7:07 AM
    • 998 Posts
    • 1,597 Thanks
    chesky
    • #3
    • 21st Feb 18, 7:07 AM
    • #3
    • 21st Feb 18, 7:07 AM
    Are your children going to continue to live with you, your husband, or move out to be on their own?
    • PeacefulWaters
    • By PeacefulWaters 21st Feb 18, 7:12 AM
    • 8,318 Posts
    • 10,656 Thanks
    PeacefulWaters
    • #4
    • 21st Feb 18, 7:12 AM
    • #4
    • 21st Feb 18, 7:12 AM
    Keeping it amicable minimises legal costs.

    One of you needs to divorce the other giving appropriate reasons - £550. No need for solicitors. I had a paid hour with one where I went prepared with a long list of questions and it set me up to DIY.

    Ideally a consent order needs drawing up by a solicitor to agree the division of assets. c£250 plus £50 court costs. This is effectively your clean break agreement. and stops him coming after your Euromillions win in future.

    While you may feel shocked and saddened now, especially if it's come out of the blue, there will come a point where you renew yourself and starting again becomes refreshing.

    Good luck.
    • Robots
    • By Robots 22nd Feb 18, 1:51 PM
    • 54 Posts
    • 730 Thanks
    Robots
    • #5
    • 22nd Feb 18, 1:51 PM
    • #5
    • 22nd Feb 18, 1:51 PM
    It would make things a little easier if you stayed in the house until your children are ready to move out. This will minimise the impact on them and also give you more time to make sure you have covered everything.
    Veteran gamer and clean freak
    • zml
    • By zml 8th Mar 18, 6:43 AM
    • 72 Posts
    • 19 Thanks
    zml
    • #6
    • 8th Mar 18, 6:43 AM
    • #6
    • 8th Mar 18, 6:43 AM
    I am planning on them living with me although my daughter may decide she wants to live with her father.
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