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  • FIRST POST
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 31st Jan 18, 12:15 AM
    • 2,129Posts
    • 12,952Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    My journey to a debt free life
    • #1
    • 31st Jan 18, 12:15 AM
    My journey to a debt free life 31st Jan 18 at 12:15 AM
    Well Iíve been reading everyoneís diaryís and thought itís such a good idea I would start one myself,Iím hoping to use it as a way to record my journey to freedom from debt and also to have somewhere to come and just offload stuff
    My financial meltdown happened two weeks ago when I realised I just canít afford to pay my debts off properly,Iím sinking under the strain and jut adding more and more onto the total because itís just not sustainable. I came here and was given some brilliant advice then I went away and procrastinated for a week while pooping myself some more about what I am about to do I finally got my !!!! in gear this week and started the ball rollin by registering on the SC site and partially filling out the budget form,I then came unstuck because some of the info wasnít to hand,Iíve now sorted that and can proceed with finishing the budget form which I am doing tomorrow,by the end of this week I want to have contacted SC and set the ball rolling to set up a DMP.
    I then had problems with my online account for one of my creditors but I sorted that out this morning whilst also finding out exactly what I owe them,it was actually not as much as I thought but still too much so swings and roundabouts 😊 actually sorting that out today took me ten minutes but itís taken me days to do it,I just get overwhelmed and put stuff off then before I know it another week has gone by and nothing has changed. Still Iíve done what I set out to do today and tomorrow is budget form day then I will see where I go from there
    In other news I changed my phone provider on Saturday so now have a sim only deal for £9 a month instead of £20.02 plus I cancelled the insurance at £6 a month,Iíve also paid for the phone now too so there is a small saving,two weeks ago my phone contract was costing me £35 so Iím quite pleased with this new deal.
    Ok I think thatís enough waffling for one day and I need to try and get some sleep,letís see what tomorrow brings
Page 109
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 11th Jan 20, 6:53 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
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    Onebrokelady
    Off today and went to meet my mum for lunch,she had a nice time at my sisters for Christmas so that's a relief, there are quite often rows when my family spends any time together because of my Dads attitude and behaviour, apparently he annoyed my sister several times but she managed not to fall out with him about it

    I'm now at home contemplating taking the dog out for her evening walk, I am absolutely shattered today and actually fell asleep on the bus home earlier I'm going to try not going to bed too late tonight because I have work tomorrow so need to get up at 6am

    The good news of the day is one of my chickens laid an egg this morning, I got very excited when I saw it because I haven't had any eggs for weeks now
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 11th Jan 20, 7:54 PM
    • 8,026 Posts
    • 60,544 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    I've got an oven liner from Lakeland, it is good. Well done on getting your oven cleaned it's not one of my favourite jobs. I have been known to scrub mine with a Brillo pad when desperate. Should really do it regularly but ....
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2020 £43.31
    Emergency Fund £3465/£10,000
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 11th Jan 20, 10:06 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    I've got an oven liner from Lakeland, it is good. Well done on getting your oven cleaned it's not one of my favourite jobs. I have been known to scrub mine with a Brillo pad when desperate. Should really do it regularly but ....
    Originally posted by Sun Addict
    I still haven't put the oven liner in the actual oven 🙄 but it's good to know they are worth it,it's one of those jobs you just put off isn't it and then before you realise it it's really bad,I still keep going and opening the door to see how shiny it is
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Nicnak
    • By Nicnak 12th Jan 20, 8:54 AM
    • 2,724 Posts
    • 16,454 Thanks
    Nicnak
    Hope work is okay for your OBL.

    I have still not cleaned my oven. It's the job I always put off. I might put it down as my Feb half term achievement job. x
    September 6th 2017 - Updated December 2019
    Credit Card £0 now: £0 Consolidation £15,000 = £7,365 Total = £25,330 £7,365 71% gone EMF #252 = £1100/£1000
    Pay off all your debts by Christmas #071

    Decluttering target 437/365 items
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 12th Jan 20, 11:16 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Hope work is okay for your OBL.

    I have still not cleaned my oven. It's the job I always put off. I might put it down as my Feb half term achievement job. x
    Originally posted by Nicnak
    Work was lovely Nicknak,I'm still shattered though so spent the day yawning
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 12th Jan 20, 11:24 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Work was ok today,I had to sit with a patient all day so we played board games, watched a couple of films did some colouring and I had a go at shooting basketball 😀 ,I wish everyday was like that, its fun to spend time with patients instead of running round not having time

    I walked home from work then had a nice hot shower,I'm now chilling out before going to bed in a bit,I can have a lie in now for two days because I'm off

    Tomorrow I've got to pop into town because I need dog food and some shopping for me,then I plan to do the ironing, clean the chickens out and do some sewing, this might change depending on how I feel,I've been a bit achey today but I think it's mostly from scrubbing the oven
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 13th Jan 20, 3:07 PM
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    Onebrokelady
    I did change my plans today,I still haven't done the ironing but I have been in town for the dog food and shopping,I've polished downstairs and hoovered everywhere, the kitchen needed tidying so that's been done and I had a quick whizz round the bathroom,I also remembered to clean the chickens out,I'm now having a cup of tea while I update here then I'm sewing

    I think might do the ironing tonight because there is a new series of Cold Feet on so I can do it while I watch that

    I found another egg in the coop today so tonight I'm having a quick tea of hash browns sausages and fried egg

    Tomorrow I'm going to DD1s because last week she decided to come here, we will take the DGC to the local playgroup in the morning and then go to her house for the afternoon,I don't cook tomorrow because I get chips on the way home normally ,then I eat them on the bus,it takes me about half an hour to get back here then a twenty minute walk from where the bus drops me off so I like to eat on the way home

    Right I'm off to do some sewing
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 13th Jan 20, 4:20 PM
    • 8,026 Posts
    • 60,544 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Enjoy your day with DD1 tomorrow and your chips on the way home
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2020 £43.31
    Emergency Fund £3465/£10,000
    • Sunshine girl2
    • By Sunshine girl2 13th Jan 20, 7:48 PM
    • 493 Posts
    • 3,113 Thanks
    Sunshine girl2
    Enjoy your day with the family tomorrow , love playing with the GKs . You are a very active person OBL , you never seem to sit still.

    What are you sewing ? Have a good evening.
    • Nicnak
    • By Nicnak 13th Jan 20, 7:51 PM
    • 2,724 Posts
    • 16,454 Thanks
    Nicnak
    Fancy doing all that at my house? This decluttering is leaving a lot of obvious dust!!

    x
    September 6th 2017 - Updated December 2019
    Credit Card £0 now: £0 Consolidation £15,000 = £7,365 Total = £25,330 £7,365 71% gone EMF #252 = £1100/£1000
    Pay off all your debts by Christmas #071

    Decluttering target 437/365 items
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 1:39 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Enjoy your day with the family tomorrow , love playing with the GKs . You are a very active person OBL , you never seem to sit still.

    What are you sewing ? Have a good evening.
    Originally posted by Sunshine girl2

    It's a cross stitch that I got for Christmas,It's called Nutcracker Christmas and you make it up into a decoration to be displayed in the sewing hoop you make it in, it's really cute and I'm quite sad that I've nearly finished it

    I look active when I see my diary updates on here but I still manage to spend a fair amount of time sitting on my bum scrolling though FB,Instagram or reading
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 1:40 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Enjoy your day with DD1 tomorrow and your chips on the way home
    Originally posted by Sun Addict
    I didn't end up going so sadly no chips for me today
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 1:41 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Fancy doing all that at my house? This decluttering is leaving a lot of obvious dust!!

    x
    Originally posted by Nicnak
    just think how quick it will be to clean your newly decluttered house though
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 14th Jan 20, 1:42 PM
    • 3,561 Posts
    • 22,975 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    It's not really the weather for being out and about so while it's a shame about missing the chips, you will be warmer indoors.
    Are you rescheduling for next week?
    MFW #30 Overpaid by £4,100.58/£3000 in 2018
    Overpaid by £3,259.33/2,880.00 to 29/11/19
    Decluttered in 2019: 2,041/2,019 as of 21/10/19
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 2:04 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Change of plans again today,I didn't end up going to DDs because DD2s hamster is ill and looks worse so I had to try and get an appointment at the vets for him, I got hardly any sleep last night so woke up this morning feeling like rubbish,I cancelled my day with DD1 in favour of going back to bed for a few hours,I'm trying to divert a major pain flare up because i have work tomorrow and don't want to be ill

    DD1 is quite clearly not happy that I didn't go because her reply to my message was "oh ok, I've been up all night as well" I don't know what she was expecting me to say, this is only the second time in 2 years that I have let her down and unlike her I have to go to work tomorrow, she only has both the children on her own one day a week because the eldest goes to nursery two days a week she sees me on a Tuesday when I spend all day running round after the toddler, his other gran has him on a Wednesday even though DD is on maternity leave at the moment then her husband is there all weekend
    I'm getting fed up of being taken for granted and if I say I find it hard she just says try looking after two of them, I want to reply that I did when I brought her and her sister up on my own with no help from my family for most of the time
    When she goes back to work I'm having them both on different days until the eldests free nursery hours kick in, I'm dreading it to be honest because I'm going to be worn out

    Anyway I couldn't get an appointment for the hamster today so I went back to bed and woke up at 1pm, I feel much better now 😊
    DD2 sent a photo of the hamsters skin to the vet and she wants to talk to their specialist before she sees him, she asked us to go tomorrow but I'm working and DD2 is on her UNI placement so neither of us can get there tomorrow ,he is now booked in for Friday and I'm hoping they will sort him out, one vet says he has a fungal infection, one says it's mites and the last one we saw said it's a type of lymphoma,it looks like mange to me and I'm really paranoid it's going to infect the dog ,we are washing our hands after handling him and using hand gel but I'm still worried

    I'm going to spend my peaceful afternoon reading and sewing I think
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 14th Jan 20, 2:46 PM
    • 3,561 Posts
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    Cherryfudge
    Enjoy your peaceful afternoon!

    Might it be worth waiting for a neutral time and saying to DD1 that you know what it's like to bring up two on your own? Then leave that to percolate if she doesn't do the 'It's worse for me' scenario. It does sound as though one of hers is very hard work, but for that reason, and your health situation, might it be wise to tell her you can only do one day a week? She will doubtless tell you she needs to work, but so do you and if she didn't have that support from you she would either have to reduce her working hours or find other help. She's also a generation younger so has physical advantages even without taking your health condition into consideration. Just my thoughts, mind you - I know you have to take other things into consideration.

    I think it's In Need of Direction who calls these things 'tolerances' and is working to reduce the niggles that make life more difficult than it need be, and perhaps your wanting to say something to your DD is a 'tolerance'? Please ignore me or tell me I know nothing if I'm off track with this!

    I hope the hamster gets some treatment that works, poor little thing.
    MFW #30 Overpaid by £4,100.58/£3000 in 2018
    Overpaid by £3,259.33/2,880.00 to 29/11/19
    Decluttered in 2019: 2,041/2,019 as of 21/10/19
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 4:19 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    Enjoy your peaceful afternoon!

    Might it be worth waiting for a neutral time and saying to DD1 that you know what it's like to bring up two on your own? Then leave that to percolate if she doesn't do the 'It's worse for me' scenario. It does sound as though one of hers is very hard work, but for that reason, and your health situation, might it be wise to tell her you can only do one day a week? She will doubtless tell you she needs to work, but so do you and if she didn't have that support from you she would either have to reduce her working hours or find other help. She's also a generation younger so has physical advantages even without taking your health condition into consideration. Just my thoughts, mind you - I know you have to take other things into consideration.

    I think it's In Need of Direction who calls these things 'tolerances' and is working to reduce the niggles that make life more difficult than it need be, and perhaps your wanting to say something to your DD is a 'tolerance'? Please ignore me or tell me I know nothing if I'm off track with this!

    I hope the hamster gets some treatment that works, poor little thing.
    Originally posted by Cherryfudge
    You are completely on track with your reply Cherry, unfortunately I know from experience that there possibly won't be a good time to broach the subject with her, she gets very irate if things aren't going her way
    I've tried to tell her on numerous occasions that but her stock reply is try being me or try this or try that it's like she thinks she is the only person on the planet with two children, the baby is demanding but he is 6 months old now so can be left on his play may for a bit while she does other things,I offered to have the baby so she could spend some time with the toddler but she didn't take me up on it, she can sit and cuddle the baby all day and look at her phone whereas she has to engage with the toddler to entertain him, she shouldn't have had two children so close together because the older one is too young to understand what's going on

    I don't think I have any choice but to look after them because she will fall out with me if I don't and I don't want to risk that because then I won't get to see them at all,I only see them now if she needs me to baby sit

    I wouldn't even mind if they at least said thanks but I don't even get that, just a surly remark if I'm unavailable at any time

    Oops forgot to add that the vet wants us to send more photos of the hamster from different angles to show the specialist, that's going to be fun as he is about the size of a cotton wool ball, he is a Roberovski ( not sure of spelling) so is tiny,luckily he has got to be the most friendly hamster I have ever come across,he just doesn't mind what you do with him and never bites ,the vet fell totally in love with him when she met him,I hope they can sort him out because it's not nice for him and my poor DD2 is so upset that he's poorly,she is worrying that he is suffering and we cant tell,the vet said so long as he is eating and drinking he is probably feeling ok,he still goes on his wheel every night, I hate to think he is in pain though and we can't tell
    Last edited by Onebrokelady; 14-01-2020 at 4:27 PM.
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Onebrokelady
    • By Onebrokelady 14th Jan 20, 4:33 PM
    • 2,129 Posts
    • 12,952 Thanks
    Onebrokelady
    I didn't read for long,I decided that being as I was stuck indoors I might as well do the ironing which was still lurking in the spare room, so that's all done now, I also had to go out and sort the chickens out too,I would have done that before I went out if I had gone but was able to leave it until the afternoon
    It's been an awful day here today weather wise,I let the chickens out because it briefly stopped raining but it started again by the time I got back indoors,I'm not sure they actually came out of the run to be honest,I filled their treat bowls up with corn and mealworms to cheer them up 😊
    Original Debt Owed Jan 18 = £17,630 Paid To Date = £2,395Total Now Owed = £15,235
    Emergency Fund = £1000 Xmas savings = £0
    • Nicnak
    • By Nicnak 14th Jan 20, 8:20 PM
    • 2,724 Posts
    • 16,454 Thanks
    Nicnak
    I'm really sorry that you have that kind of relationship. My mum looks after my little one for three after schools, and I won't ask her to do anymore unless I am desperate as I feel she does enough. My little one always thanks her, and so do I. I also occasionally buy her flowers in between things as a little thank you. I think at the very least, a thank you is in order.

    I understand why you think it is hard as you obviously want a relationship with them and if she would take it personally, you would lose that. It must be difficult to manage.

    I like the sound of your sewing. I want to do more, but have no more time to commit.

    I do have two sewing hoops so might end up deciding to do something with them this year instead of looking at them.

    My house is still cluttered! It's just a little less in the drawers so they now close! My aim is to be as clutter free as I can be! x
    September 6th 2017 - Updated December 2019
    Credit Card £0 now: £0 Consolidation £15,000 = £7,365 Total = £25,330 £7,365 71% gone EMF #252 = £1100/£1000
    Pay off all your debts by Christmas #071

    Decluttering target 437/365 items
    • Drawingaline
    • By Drawingaline 14th Jan 20, 8:24 PM
    • 1,016 Posts
    • 3,451 Thanks
    Drawingaline
    Please don't look after your gc to the detriment of your own health. I relied heavily on my mum, and she would never say she wasn't up to it, this culminated in a huge incident involving my youngest (social services were involved!!!) because she wouldn't tell me that she wasn't coping. This incident was two years ago and the effects are still felt in our relationship. I had to rearrange my childcare and I coped. Unfortunately the strained relationship with my mum is the end result. It took me a year to even ask her for help with the kids and I am very careful to limit the amount he does and never take for granted that she will be able to help. She has got better at saying no to me too. (unfortunately not to my sister who I feel is still asking too much of her).

    Anyway I just wanted to give you another perspective. Your daughter may not like having to look at her childcare arrangements, but if you end up really ill she will have to anyway.
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