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  • FIRST POST
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 28th Jan 18, 11:56 AM
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    Lilith1980
    Let's do this!
    • #1
    • 28th Jan 18, 11:56 AM
    Let's do this! 28th Jan 18 at 11:56 AM
    Hi everyone

    I've been a member on the forums for some years, but not been active for a long time. I really want to get myself out of debt and feel that keeping a diary will keep me accountable so I came over here

    My debt has accrued since my 20s where I think I bought things to fill a void without being able to pay them back. I've been a bit of a "I need to have it now otherwise I'll never be able to have it!" type person. It's only recently (I'm now 37!) that I've been able to give myself a talking to and say if I don't have the spare cash then it can't go on my cards. I'm spending far too much on minimum payments which could go towards holidays and treats etc.

    Dealing with my debt has also been difficult as I've been a been a student for about eight years so paying the fees has come first, although for my latest (and final!) course I had to pay for some of the fees on my credit card. Not ideal by any means but the career opportunities and salary will enable me to pay off more towards my debts.

    I'm studying a doctorate and will be doing my viva in March 2018. A few months' ago I got a new job on the understanding that I would be qualifying in my profession shortly. Once my viva is passed (assuming I don't totally botch it!) I'll be qualified and my salary will increase to a level where I can pay £200-£200 per month extra off of my debts.

    But it's not just the salary increase which will help. My whole mindset has to change and I hope that by keeping this diary it will help motivate me to keep going and wipe this debt off for good! I'll post my numbers in the next post.

    I look forward to "meeting" you all. Please feel free to chip in with money saving ideas or other ways to reduce debt as I'm aware there are wiser souls here than myself
    My debt-free diary
Page 22
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 13th Oct 18, 10:06 AM
    • 2,338 Posts
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    Seasidegal58
    Perhaps try and put a little away for an emergency fund for those awkward expenses that crop up from time to time.

    As Cumbria said, it'll all work out.
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 19/11/2018 - £1777.03
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 29
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 13th Oct 18, 3:30 PM
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    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    Perhaps try and put a little away for an emergency fund for those awkward expenses that crop up from time to time.

    As Cumbria said, it'll all work out.
    Originally posted by Seasidegal58
    Thanks SSG, yeah I need to be better at the emergency fund. I'm sure it'll be okay, I just need to stop worrying!
    My debt-free diary
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 16th Oct 18, 5:01 AM
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    Lilith1980
    I've been figuring out that if I start drawing money from the business to pay off my debts, I can pay an extra £150 off approx per month, which would make a real dent after a year. SO from October I'm going to start doing this. We have enough of a reserve in the account to be able to pay the room rent for a good few months if all our clients suddenly disappeared.

    I heard yesterday that some man has been wandering around our local area (right near me) early in the morning doing things to himself you shouldn't do in public. A woman reported it. I normally take the pooch out at that time, but hubby said he'd come with me now. I like to think I'm tough but if I was faced with that I think it might scare me. I got home about 8pm last night and I'm annoyed that I now feel wary being out when it's dark
    My debt-free diary
    • Munchin
    • By Munchin 21st Oct 18, 11:24 AM
    • 2,471 Posts
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    Munchin
    Hi Lilith

    Why on earth do people do these mad things? I can’t work out what it gives them to upset people. We had a few incidents in our town last year where some man lashed out at women on their own. Nothing has happened for a year but I was really cautious going out on my own and you are right to take hubby with you.

    Love your idea of throwing more at the debt
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 21st Oct 18, 4:23 PM
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    Lilith1980
    Hi Lilith

    Why on earth do people do these mad things? I can’t work out what it gives them to upset people. We had a few incidents in our town last year where some man lashed out at women on their own. Nothing has happened for a year but I was really cautious going out on my own and you are right to take hubby with you.

    Love your idea of throwing more at the debt
    Originally posted by Munchin
    Thanks Munchin. We had something else happen a few days' later where a teenage girl was slashed with a knife by a teenage boy.I came home one evening last week and there were police and ambulances! I think the girl was okay. Lived here 5 years and never heard about any trouble really, now it all seems to have hit at once
    My debt-free diary
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 30th Oct 18, 5:41 AM
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    Lilith1980
    Okay good news is my new role does start in November so I won't be short through the Christmas period which is a relief

    I've been feeling really delicate this past week about the whole Christmas thing. I really struggle, and going to see family is going to be the usual difficult experience. I feel like I'm just holding my breath until it's all over
    My debt-free diary
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 30th Oct 18, 5:56 AM
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    Cumbria lass
    Okay good news is my new role does start in November so I won't be short through the Christmas period which is a relief

    I've been feeling really delicate this past week about the whole Christmas thing. I really struggle, and going to see family is going to be the usual difficult experience. I feel like I'm just holding my breath until it's all over
    Originally posted by Lilith1980
    That is good news Lilith about your job . Re Christmas is there no way you can do something else with just you and DH . I remember you going to a family event earlier in the year and you saying it wasn't pleasant. .
    CC1 £3500 Nov 2018.
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 30th Oct 18, 6:02 AM
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    Lilith1980
    That is good news Lilith about your job . Re Christmas is there no way you can do something else with just you and DH . I remember you going to a family event earlier in the year and you saying it wasn't pleasant. .
    Originally posted by Cumbria lass
    Hey Cumbria, the problem is even if we went away there's an expectation that we'd go down in the new year to have "another Christmas". When we went away before it was lovely, but I was still preoccupied thinking about having to go down there afterwards :/

    I know in my rational mind that we shouldn't have to go down there. It's definitely more out of duty and expectation than anything else, and I'm annoyed at myself that I don't have the balls to just not go. Maybe next year I could start sewing the seed early about us going away.
    My debt-free diary
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 30th Oct 18, 1:31 PM
    • 58,653 Posts
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    beanielou
    Good news on the job.

    As I am a lot older than you I no longer feel pressurised to do things that I really dont want too. Which is good.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 30th Oct 18, 6:08 PM
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    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    Good news on the job.

    As I am a lot older than you I no longer feel pressurised to do things that I really dont want too. Which is good.
    Originally posted by beanielou
    I long to get to that age then! Although, maybe I shouldn't wait. I don't have to meet people's expectations. It's just that feeling of knowing you're going against them.
    My debt-free diary
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 30th Oct 18, 9:29 PM
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    • 243,018 Thanks
    beanielou
    I long to get to that age then! Although, maybe I shouldn't wait. I don't have to meet people's expectations. It's just that feeling of knowing you're going against them.
    Originally posted by Lilith1980
    But doing what is best for you is important.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 30th Oct 18, 9:35 PM
    • 1,943 Posts
    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    I know. Maybe one day I'll be brave enough to. I'm working on it
    My debt-free diary
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 6th Nov 18, 5:09 AM
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    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    I'm so glad firework night is officially over. Poor pooch hid herself behind the sofa at certain points over the weekend

    My personal therapy is going to be more difficult now that my working days have changed. I have an appointment next week, but can't see my therapist until 7.30pm so won't be getting home until 9pm. It's not something I want to be doing regularly as I'm busy enough and everything I'm doing is mentally taxing. Getting home so late in the week when I'm up early the next morning isn't going to help as I work 2 late nights as it is.

    I'd been thinking about finishing therapy in the new year depending on how I get on over xmas. I've been going for almost a year and sometimes it's good to have a break and take stock of what I've done in therapy so I'm going to seriously consider this.
    My debt-free diary
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 6th Nov 18, 6:20 AM
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    Cumbria lass
    I'm so glad firework night is officially over. Poor pooch hid herself behind the sofa at certain points over the weekend

    My personal therapy is going to be more difficult now that my working days have changed. I have an appointment next week, but can't see my therapist until 7.30pm so won't be getting home until 9pm. It's not something I want to be doing regularly as I'm busy enough and everything I'm doing is mentally taxing. Getting home so late in the week when I'm up early the next morning isn't going to help as I work 2 late nights as it is.

    I'd been thinking about finishing therapy in the new year depending on how I get on over xmas. I've been going for almost a year and sometimes it's good to have a break and take stock of what I've done in therapy so I'm going to seriously consider this.
    Originally posted by Lilith1980
    I think that is a really sensible idea, see how you get on at Xmas . Is it something you can access quickly again should you need to ? Long days seem all the worse in the dark. Let's hope the fireworks are finished now .
    CC1 £3500 Nov 2018.
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 6th Nov 18, 6:34 AM
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    Lilith1980
    Thanks Cumbria, yes I'm sure I'd be able to see her again so it's not like it's closed off. However, there's a part of me thinking about seeing someone else for various reasons but then I'd have to go through the whole thing again which would be frustrating lol. I think I'll have a break and then see how I feel,

    Days are definitely worse now it's getting dark earlier lol
    My debt-free diary
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 9th Nov 18, 5:10 PM
    • 2,338 Posts
    • 14,466 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    Hi Lilith - just finished catching up. That's a good idea you have for using the spare cash for the debt.

    I hope they've caught the wandering weirdo as well so that you feel safe going out on your own. What is it with these men!? Women don't do these sort of things! Perhaps a vigilante posse of angry women might sort him out!

    I sure you'll come to the right decision re the therapy.
    X
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 19/11/2018 - £1777.03
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 29
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 9th Nov 18, 5:47 PM
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    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    Thanks SSG. Never did hear anymore about the weirdo, but hubby comes out to walk the dog with me now and it's quite nice to have the time together to chat before our working day begins!
    My debt-free diary
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 13th Nov 18, 5:34 AM
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    Lilith1980
    Well the "putting money aside for debt" won't happen just yet. Hubby and I have a week off in March over my birthday and we've booked a tripped to the Harry Potter tour in London. We ummed and ahhed about staying in London for a long weekend but it was stupidly expensive, so we have booked a cottage half an hour outside of London for a week which costs the same. It means we can go to the tour, but also have time to explore the countryside so the best of both worlds.

    I only had to put a small deposit to secure the cottage and the rest doesn't have to be paid 'til February 2019, but I'll have to take bits out of our self-employed earnings to put away ready. So, I can still pay some towards my credit card but not as much until after Feb. I have to remember though that I can't pay off my debt and neglect the fact that I also need a break. It's hard though, as it feels like a wasted opportunity to get the debt down even though I know it'll do us good
    My debt-free diary
    • Munchin
    • By Munchin 13th Nov 18, 12:48 PM
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    Munchin
    Hi Lilith

    I am determined to clear my debt quickly but also have a life which is why sis and I are going to see Pink in Scotland in May . We have paid for tickets and just need to get flights over for a night and will stay with one of my good friends when we are there. Will not be cheap but so worth it.

    It's not a wasted opportunity if it is helping to keep you sane and happy.
    • Lilith1980
    • By Lilith1980 14th Nov 18, 6:11 AM
    • 1,943 Posts
    • 5,639 Thanks
    Lilith1980
    Hi Lilith

    I am determined to clear my debt quickly but also have a life which is why sis and I are going to see Pink in Scotland in May . We have paid for tickets and just need to get flights over for a night and will stay with one of my good friends when we are there. Will not be cheap but so worth it.

    It's not a wasted opportunity if it is helping to keep you sane and happy.
    Originally posted by Munchin
    Thanks Munchin, it's good to get perspective
    My debt-free diary
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