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  • FIRST POST
    • swingaloo
    • By swingaloo 6th Jan 18, 1:33 PM
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    swingaloo
    What could he be up to?
    • #1
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:33 PM
    What could he be up to? 6th Jan 18 at 1:33 PM
    Asking on behalf of my friend. She is divorced and is still living in the family home with the 3 children as agreed by a court order at the time of the divorce.

    The father does not see the children who are now all in their early teens. He has almost no contact with my friend either.

    Recently he sent a message asking her to let him have a photocopy of a utility bill showing her name for the address of the family home.

    He has also asked for copies of the children's birth certificates and passports.

    When asked why he needed these things he said it was for 'a check his company needed to make for his job'????? He has been in the job for three and a half years.

    She isn't going to provide them to him as it seems a very odd thing for his company to need.

    Any ideas what he could be up to to need this kind of info?
Page 1
    • elsien
    • By elsien 6th Jan 18, 1:38 PM
    • 16,519 Posts
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    elsien
    • #2
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:38 PM
    • #2
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:38 PM
    Putting some money somewhere for the children?
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
    • swingaloo
    • By swingaloo 6th Jan 18, 1:40 PM
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    swingaloo
    • #3
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:40 PM
    • #3
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:40 PM
    The children don't even get Xmas or birthday presents and he has already said they will never see a penny from him.

    Even if that was the case why would he need a utility bill to show she was paying the bills at the property?
    • gettingtheresometime
    • By gettingtheresometime 6th Jan 18, 1:52 PM
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    gettingtheresometime
    • #4
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:52 PM
    • #4
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:52 PM
    There!!!8217;s no way I!!!8217;d be providing this info.

    As far as his company was concerned I!!!8217;d reply that as we!!!8217;re now divorced, they should consider us as two people who are no longer legally connected and as the children are minors then the company has no need to carry out checks on them.

    Even if the company needed the birth certificates as the children had been listed as beneficiaries of some death in service benefit, as it would only come into play if the ex died there!!!8217;s no need for the company to have that info now - especially the passports!
    Lloyds OD / Natwest OD / PO CC / Wescott / Argos Card cleared thanks to the 1 debt v 100 day challenge


    Next on the list - JD Williams
    • DCFC79
    • By DCFC79 6th Jan 18, 1:54 PM
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    DCFC79
    • #5
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:54 PM
    • #5
    • 6th Jan 18, 1:54 PM
    If it really were "a check his company needed to make for his job", surely he could get some kind confirmation of this check printed out on headed paper.

    Seems an odd combination of info to be asking for, don't provide it.
    Last edited by DCFC79; 06-01-2018 at 2:01 PM.
    • gettingtheresometime
    • By gettingtheresometime 6th Jan 18, 3:25 PM
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    gettingtheresometime
    • #6
    • 6th Jan 18, 3:25 PM
    • #6
    • 6th Jan 18, 3:25 PM
    If it really were "a check his company needed to make for his job", surely he could get some kind confirmation of this check printed out on headed paper.

    Seems an odd combination of info to be asking for, don't provide it.
    Originally posted by DCFC79
    Call me a suspicious cynic but I don!!!8217;t think I!!!8217;d even trust that.

    Presumably it wouldn!!!8217;t be at all difficult for him to type up a letter on headed paper !!!8216;requesting!!!8217; this information.
    Lloyds OD / Natwest OD / PO CC / Wescott / Argos Card cleared thanks to the 1 debt v 100 day challenge


    Next on the list - JD Williams
    • trailingspouse
    • By trailingspouse 6th Jan 18, 3:30 PM
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    trailingspouse
    • #7
    • 6th Jan 18, 3:30 PM
    • #7
    • 6th Jan 18, 3:30 PM
    Nothing to stop your friend calling her ex's company direct and checking that it's legit. And if it is, they can put it in writing to her and she can provide the info direct to them.

    But I can't imagine why they would need this stuff either.
    • unholyangel
    • By unholyangel 6th Jan 18, 4:29 PM
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    unholyangel
    • #8
    • 6th Jan 18, 4:29 PM
    • #8
    • 6th Jan 18, 4:29 PM
    Call me a suspicious cynic but I don’t think I’d even trust that.

    Presumably it wouldn’t be at all difficult for him to type up a letter on headed paper ‘requesting’ this information.
    Originally posted by gettingtheresometime
    No but if it was genuinely from the company (particularly if its a national or international company) I would expect it to have contact details for whoever wrote it. Perhaps name, department, extension number & email address.

    I'd also expect the letter to give an exact reason for requiring that documentation rather than just a vague "need to run checks".
    Money doesn't solve poverty.....it creates it.
    • martinthebandit
    • By martinthebandit 6th Jan 18, 4:31 PM
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    martinthebandit
    • #9
    • 6th Jan 18, 4:31 PM
    • #9
    • 6th Jan 18, 4:31 PM
    Does he work somewhere that needs a security clearance perhaps?
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    • gt568
    • By gt568 6th Jan 18, 4:32 PM
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    gt568
    What is his job?
    Down with the signature fascists!!
    • swingaloo
    • By swingaloo 6th Jan 18, 4:47 PM
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    • 3,298 Thanks
    swingaloo
    He works for a national company and is in furniture design.
    Its not a new job and does not involve any data protection or cash handling.

    I think the thing that she is most concerned about is him wanting a utility bill in her name. She is still in the marital home, he has married again and lives about 100 miles from her. Neither of us can understand it, its as if he is having to prove he does not live at her address by him asking for a document in her name. But she still has his surname so by giving him a utility bill would prove nothing.

    He sounds desperate to get these things from her, he has had no contact for ages, doesn't bother with her at all, then loads of texts over the last 24 hours saying he needs them urgently but wont elaborate on the reason.
    • CRANKY40
    • By CRANKY40 6th Jan 18, 5:06 PM
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    CRANKY40
    Just no. My late husband worked for the M.O.D. Nothing like this was required for that so I'd say no. Children's passports? Really......
    • swingaloo
    • By swingaloo 6th Jan 18, 5:11 PM
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    swingaloo
    He doesn't actually want the kids passports, he just wants a scan of the main page. I wondered if he was going to try to get new passports for them but they are too old to be abducted.

    It also didn't explain the utility bill for his previous address. He still has a mortgage on that house so we wondered if he was going to try to re mortgage but that wouldn't explain the passport scans.

    He is a devious man and often gets into money trouble so there will be something shady going on.
    • elsien
    • By elsien 6th Jan 18, 5:14 PM
    • 16,519 Posts
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    elsien
    He can send off for copies of the birth certificates himself if he wants them. The rest does just sound odd.
    Any sorts of insurances or PPI she's forgotten about he might be trying to claim?
    Last edited by elsien; 06-01-2018 at 5:18 PM.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
    • Jojo the Tightfisted
    • By Jojo the Tightfisted 6th Jan 18, 5:15 PM
    • 24,385 Posts
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    Jojo the Tightfisted
    Initially, I'd say the bill was for a DBS check (they are usually renewed by companies that require them after 3 years) - but that's unlikely if he's remarried, lives somewhere else and also wants the birth certificates and passports.

    I'd be more suspicious that it's for some sort of credit application, secured upon the basis that he/his wife owns more than one property. Or they are applying for social housing/benefit if he's lost his job and hasn't admitted it, so need to prove that he and his wife have dependent children. Bankruptcy is also a possibility.

    If he wants copy birth certificates, he is perfectly entitled to purchase some himself.


    I wouldn't provide those documents to him. If there were to be a legitimate reason for needing them, I'm sure that he could arrange for the relevant organisation to write to her and explain the reasons for the request.


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    Originally posted by colinw
    • CRANKY40
    • By CRANKY40 6th Jan 18, 5:15 PM
    • 2,831 Posts
    • 30,484 Thanks
    CRANKY40
    s.

    He is a devious man and often gets into money trouble so there will be something shady going on.
    Originally posted by swingaloo
    I was thinking maybe he is trying to borrow against the equity in the house which would result in a second charge against the property.
    • Primrose
    • By Primrose 6th Jan 18, 5:27 PM
    • 8,054 Posts
    • 28,160 Thanks
    Primrose
    If I were your friend I would contact the mortgage company, explain that something strange is going on which she doesn,t understand and ask them to verify with her personally if they receive any strange requests as they will definitely not be coming from her with her agreement.
    • firefox1956
    • By firefox1956 6th Jan 18, 5:28 PM
    • 1,518 Posts
    • 905 Thanks
    firefox1956
    Whatever he wants the documents for I certainly would NOT give them to him..........
    • silvercar
    • By silvercar 6th Jan 18, 5:38 PM
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    silvercar
    Could he have another child somewhere? Maybe there is a claim for maintenance and he needs to prove he has other children to maintain? Or may be he is trying to claim some benefit or possible a council property and needs to show he has other children that he needs to house.

    Could be as daft as applying for a larger wheelie bin, here you have to show the birth certificates of 5 people to be given a larger bin.
    • swingaloo
    • By swingaloo 6th Jan 18, 5:53 PM
    • 1,827 Posts
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    swingaloo
    Just to answer some of the posts above-

    The mortgage on the house my friend lives in is in her ex's name only so if he were to re-mortgage she would not be involved. The mortgage company would not be able to speak to her for this reason. There is very little equity in the property.

    He lives in a rented property and has 4 more children. He is very much a snob and would not consider a council house if he was offered one rent free.

    He is a very high earner and besides the mortgage on the marital home and maintenance he is also paying 1500 a month rent. He may well have money issues though as he has always lived above his means and likes to appear as a 'well to do man of the world'. The reality is far different.

    He has definitely not lost his job and he is paying maintenance on time.
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