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  • FIRST POST
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings
    • #1
    • 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings 1st Jan 18 at 11:51 AM
    Good Morning my Lovelies.

    And welcome to the new bright and shiny Frump to Fab Thread.

    First of all a very big hello and welcome to everyone, newbies, lurkers and returners....and those undecided.

    Second let me wish you all “Happy New Year”.

    Let’s rock this one!!!!

    Well now where do we start this year. We have quite a history here now don’t we. I was thinking this morning about how the thread has developed so for the newbies......a brief potted history.

    A few years ago my son took a photo of me. I was horrified. I burst into tears. I could hardly believe my eyes at the image before me. But.......as we know the camera doesn’t lie and I couldn’t argue with what That image revealed.

    I went upstairs and stood in front of a full mirror and allowed the awful truth to sink in........never mind frump, I looked like a bag lady.

    In my defence.......it was not down to laziness, far from it. I was caring for my semi Paralysed terminally ill husband. My days were full on with caring duties. I scarcely had a spare minute, it was all I could do to shower and brush my teeth sometimes.

    All very noble of course but I had completely neglected myself in the process. I had forgotten the simple golden rule........we cannot care for others if we don’t care for ourselves. We cannot give love, if we don’t treat ourselves with love.

    How many women forget this simple fact. In our busy lives as mothers, daughters, sisters how often to we put ourselves last on that never ending “to do list”.

    As I stood and looked in that mirror I realised the folly of my ways and I resolved to “do something”. I wasn’t sure what exactly but I knew I had to make a start somewhere.

    So I started the first Frump to Fab Thread and, as they say, the rest is history. What started as a simple diary to help me make the necessary changes to get me out of “Frumpdom” has become a wonderful friendship group of likeminded women.

    Yes some of us are of a certain age but not all. Frumpdom is not the preserve of the middle aged woman who has “let herself go”. Becoming a frump can happen to anyone, young women, even teenagers.

    But here’s the good news .......it’s never too late to reverse the process, never too late to ditch the frump, never too late for the caterpillar to turn into a beautiful butterfly or for the ugly duckling to turn into a graceful and elegant swan.

    There are no rules to this thread except one.

    Kindness please........we don’t judge anyone here, we don’t get into futile pointless arguments, we don’t make nasty comments, we don’t indulge in sarcasm, we don’t bully others, we don’t play mind games and we don’t try to score points by making others feel small.

    So all that being said .....if you are ready to change your stars and become that alluring goddess you always longed to be, if you want to reclaim the energy and vitality that was once yours but has somehow disappeared then this is place for you.

    Let’s all get fabulous.

    Lesson no 1.

    Wear perfume, every day. Don’t save it for best. Get out all those unused smellies lurking in the back of the bathroom cabinet or bedside drawer and start using them.

    Smell divine......and fabulousity will follow. That’s a promise.

    A women who smells gorgeous is gorgeous. It’s the first step on your journey.

    Right I’m off to bathe in a sea of perfumed bubbles but first ..........

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 24-01-2018 at 10:02 AM.
Page 75
    • silvasava
    • By silvasava 9th Oct 18, 1:16 PM
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    silvasava
    Money - I like regional accents rather than the 'received' english that used to be spoken on radio and TV. The thing that irritates me is pitch - if its shrill I just switch off mentally as well as physically!
    Must admit I did look at some hula hoops in HB the other day - I could do it as a child but not sure now......think I probably need to do it in private too
    Small victories - sometimes they are all you can hope for but sometimes they are all you need - be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 9th Oct 18, 3:30 PM
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    humptydumptybits
    Our tip is a recycling centre, so I guess its in the Council's interests to let people bring whatever they can fit in their car. They work on a 'trust' basis, but you have to show proof of address and they will give you a badge for the year. The tip has huge shipping containers ,which are sorted by material. You have to climb some stairs to be able to check your stuff in. I probably climbed the stairs about 15 times that last trip!!!


    Will also be going back this weekend with the old carpet - unlike wood, you can't really leave it outside in case it rains.


    What I find frustrating is the amount of flytipping that goes on. Literally every few weeks I see sofas, mattresses and furniture dumped by the side of the road. I once emailed my local councillor with half a dozen separate items I took pictures of on my way to the station one morning. I wrote that I understood it wasnt the Councils fault that people fly tip, but unless the are going to put CCTV on every street, there was no way of catching people as its not like people will write their name and address on a mattress.


    It feels like a loosing battle and its frustrating for me, as a responsible person to do the right thing, when I could probably dump my stuff at the end of the road!!!
    Originally posted by chanie

    My local is a recycling one as well, you can take as much wood, paper, glass and cardboard as you like but the rest is restricted so I suppose I was being a bit unfair but I have very little of the stuff that is unrestricted and lots of the other stuff. I try to vary my times/days so I see a different man on the gate and I might occasionally have a bit extra of the non recyclable stuff under the cardboard but obviously that is just a might My husband is a hoarder but has realised that we can't go on with him keeping everything and I have taken 3 car loads to the local charity shop not to mention several trips to the tip. I have broken up so many cardboard boxes that it is hard to imagine.
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 9th Oct 18, 3:32 PM
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    humptydumptybits
    Money - I like regional accents rather than the 'received' english that used to be spoken on radio and TV. The thing that irritates me is pitch - if its shrill I just switch off mentally as well as physically!
    Must admit I did look at some hula hoops in HB the other day - I could do it as a child but not sure now......think I probably need to do it in private too
    Originally posted by silvasava

    Just make sure it is big enough, if you stand it up it should reach your waist and don't get one that is too light and it will be alot easier but as I said picking it up every few seconds is good exercise in itself.
    • moneyistooshorttomention
    • By moneyistooshorttomention 9th Oct 18, 4:04 PM
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    moneyistooshorttomention
    Money - I like regional accents rather than the 'received' english that used to be spoken on radio and TV. The thing that irritates me is pitch - if its shrill I just switch off mentally as well as physically!
    )
    Originally posted by silvasava
    That doesnt bother me either.

    .....and...errr...I'll not "shout over the Net" at you then - as my voice is basically modern RP

    Though I did get a comment last time I visited my home city recently that I now speak with a "slight Welsh lilt" - something no-one back here agreed with when I mentioned it....
    ****************
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 10th Oct 18, 8:00 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Oops yes, Environment Secretary not Home Secretary. Silly me.

    Well I feel dreadful, up half the night. Think it was something I ate, possibly some Brazil nuts have gone rancid although they tasted ok. I'll chuck them. I might have to cancel my massage. I really don't feel up to it.,

    I have got my handyman coming today. I don't really fancy him being here either, I just want to curl up and feel sorry for myself.

    Had a lovely day yesterday. I went to a garden centre, had lunch and bought some nice little plants, just a spot of winter colour. Then I picked up some lovely thick Greige curtains from a charity shop. 6. I have big windows and although they need shortening they will look nice in my sitting room. They were originally from dunhelm so nice quality.

    Must dash handyman has just arrived.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 11th Oct 18, 6:58 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Good morning lovely ladies.

    Well I'm all better, had a good nights sleep as well as dozing on the sofa most of the evening so have now caught up with my sleep deprivation. Feel heaps better. Aiming to have a gardening day later. One last final tidy up and planting session. Shouldn't be too onerous, my handyman did the heavy stuff yesterday. He also did a good days work inside too. He's worth his weight in gold that man. All my friends and my new neighbour want his number. I'll be putting so much work his way I think I should start taking a commission.

    Fabbing wise. I managed my massage after all. Still a bit stiff but again much improved. I've not taken my vitamins etc for a few days so need to get back on that.

    As might be expected my personal fabbing has been a bit perfunctory this last couple of weeks so I intend to get back on the wagon, starting today with defuzzing, a facial and a manicure (after the gardening)

    It was interesting reading your comments about accents etc. I am going to sound outrageously snobby or nitpicking here but I do believe that a pleasant mellifluous voice is a real asset, whether Male or female. A harsh, grating voice is a real turn off and I cannot abide people who talk too loudly. I think it's the height of rudeness. We call it "yawping" here. People in public spaces talking so loudly that you can't hear yourself think.

    I have nothing against accents, they can very attractive and they are a mark of individuality. However they must never be so thick as to make communication difficult. Sometimes they have to be modified a little.

    I do however loathe sloppy speech, bad grammar, foul language and unnecessarily loud volume. . It's just so commonplace now. Oh dear I know I sound like a boring old fogey but I believe that if we want to be fab then an attractive voice and clear diction has to be part of the package. A good clear speaking voice can also be a passport to career success. I know for a fact that I have landed good jobs for which I had no real qualications and it was largely because of my voice.

    The point about RP is that it does enable good communication because it is or was generally universal. The role of speech is to enable us to communicate, to articulate ideas and exchange information. In a world where so many jobs rely on the ability to communicate well then applicants are at a distinct disadvantage if their speech lets them down. When watching programmes about people who cannot find work I can't help but notice how many of them don't communicate very well.

    It's like fabbing. Whether we like it or not the fact is we are judged on our appearance. We are also judged the minute we open our mouths.

    We only get one chance to make a good impression. In a job interview and, of course, even in a social scenario, you only have a few seconds to 'Sell Yourself". A good voice is a very important part of the package.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 11-10-2018 at 7:10 AM.
    • moneyistooshorttomention
    • By moneyistooshorttomention 11th Oct 18, 8:17 AM
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    moneyistooshorttomention
    Couldnt agree more LL.

    It helps "oil the wheels" if people can actually understand what you're saying.

    Language is primarily for communication - and I still hold to that view (in fact - way more so now than ever after my recent move within our country).

    How do you get your message over if people don't know what you're saying? Even if I do now think "That's one quick way to identify an egoist" if they obviously don't care whether I understand them or no - ie I've identified them as thinking "She is SUPPOSED to - because I personally want it". Bingo - I've got them sussed.

    If the occasional person keels over at the end of a phoneline with a comment of "Oooh...you do talk posh" and bursts out laughing.....well they've understood me perfectly and that is what matters.

    I admit to wincing at bad grammar, etc, in writing too. I think one of my pet bugbears are Facebook requests for something where the person has just said "Tell me so-and-so (request for information)" and I have been known to re-write their post for them, adding the missing words "Could you/please".
    Last edited by moneyistooshorttomention; 11-10-2018 at 8:26 AM.
    ****************
    • silvasava
    • By silvasava 11th Oct 18, 9:47 AM
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    silvasava
    LL so pleased you are feeling better after a good night's sleep. It does make all the difference doesn't it? I planted 2 blue glazed pots yesterday with cream narcissus - I bought the bulbs in Lidl & they were huge! Hoping for a good show.
    LL MTSTM - So with you both. Clear diction ( love some of the Scots accents) and good gramnar can take you a long way, and don't get me on foul language! My granny always used to say that only ignorant people use foul language as there are plenty of suitable words in the English language to insult someone! ( She was a Scot by the way )
    Bagged myself a little bargain in the CS yesterday. I was looking at books for DH but saw a top on display in a geometric design of orchid pink and greys in a soft brushed fabric with a cowl neck - band new with labels still attached. Perfick!
    It will go nicely with my grey jeans/trousers and my coatigan for autumn.
    Small victories - sometimes they are all you can hope for but sometimes they are all you need - be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 11th Oct 18, 10:07 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Did you know that the actual words spoken only count for 7% of communicating what you want to say, the rest is made up of tone, inflection, facial expressions, gestures and body language.

    That is why even though someone might be a genius if they drone on and on they send me to sleep.

    It ain't what you say, it's the way that you say it......

    Great chazza shop bargain there Silva. When I popped in to Barnados the other day they were looking for volunteers. I think I'll give it a whirl. It's a nice shop, well laid out, easy to get to and parking is easy. I used to enjoy helping at Scope but tbh it's not an easy location for me now that I've moved and parking can be tricky.

    Watched Nigella last night....she's lost weight and is looking gorgeous. The food looked pretty good too. I noticed she's stopped all the nibbling, spoon licking etc - presumably she wants to keep her new trim figure. She still has plenty of curves, it's just now they are all in the right places. . Bless her.

    Garden wise I bought hyacinths, tulips - all from Aldi. Cheap as chips but the bulbs are big so like you say Silva I'm hoping for a nice spring display. Then some small mini shrubs and winter pansies for some winter colour. Might also get a few heathers and hellebores too. I need some nice new pots, DS1 has all my nice ones, I'm left with the tacky plastic efforts. Next year I'll treat myself. I like those bright blue ceramic ones, gorgeous colour.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 11-10-2018 at 12:02 PM.
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 11th Oct 18, 1:55 PM
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    humptydumptybits
    Just thought I'd give an update on the flax seed oil. I've been taking it for 17 days and my eyes seem a bit better but I can't be absolutely sure as they do vary a bit anyway. I've been doing alot of reading which can make them worse so I am hopeful. The added benefit of joint pain is more positive. I only have a bit of arthritis in my right wrist so nothing disabling or agonising but no pain this week so that seems very promising.



    My other find is using it on my skin. I have very dry skin, particularly my neck and I ran out of the serum I normally use at night so I opened one of the capsules and used the oil on my skin. It is brilliant and I'm having none of that dry itching feeling. So all in all it is going well.
    • pollypenny
    • By pollypenny 11th Oct 18, 5:26 PM
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    pollypenny
    I can recommend a hulahoop for the waist and stomach. I've lost 1.5 inches off my waist in about 2 months, makes my middle match the rest of me It is an easy fun way to exercise, initially I think I got most effect from bending down to pick it up again but can do a ten minute stint now with no problem. The grandchildren think it is hilarious but I think they are just jealous as I'm better at it than them.
    Originally posted by humptydumptybits


    Lurking, following your successes for a while.

    I've been wondering about getting a hula hoop - and if I'll be able use the thing. I couldn't as a 12 year old, but maybe I will do it now, thanks to tai chi.

    I lost 9 inches from my waist on 5:2 but my stomach is still flabby. Where can I buy one?
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 11th Oct 18, 6:18 PM
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    humptydumptybits
    I got mine from an ebay seller. I can look her up if you like. The really light ones they sell in toy shops are no good as they are just too light. On the otherhand you can get weighted ones but I've heard they can be quite brutal so you need the middle, just like the 3 bears


    Well done on losing the 9 inches, that is a real achievement.


    Just looked it up, the seller I bought it from was ptandmore and it was under 10 delivered, can't remember exactly. She gives you a link to her website as well which gives you some instructions that are helpful. Good luck.
    Last edited by humptydumptybits; 11-10-2018 at 6:21 PM.
    • pollypenny
    • By pollypenny 12th Oct 18, 8:14 AM
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    pollypenny
    I got mine from an ebay seller. I can look her up if you like. The really light ones they sell in toy shops are no good as they are just too light. On the otherhand you can get weighted ones but I've heard they can be quite brutal so you need the middle, just like the 3 bears


    Well done on losing the 9 inches, that is a real achievement.


    Just looked it up, the seller I bought it from was ptandmore and it was under 10 delivered, can't remember exactly. She gives you a link to her website as well which gives you some instructions that are helpful. Good luck.
    Originally posted by humptydumptybits


    That's great. Thank you so much.

    People have recommended Pilates, but I do tai chi and enjoy that.

    Re fabbing, I went with the grey about 18 months ago. It's actually brighter than the faded brown beige that the colour ended up. Big specs and bold necklaces complete the look!

    Shame about the wrinkles!
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
    • moneyistooshorttomention
    • By moneyistooshorttomention 12th Oct 18, 8:24 AM
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    moneyistooshorttomention
    "Finishing touches" then - ie those glasses and necklaces.

    One recent YouTube video I saw was along the lines of "Don't just put on 2 or 3 bits of clothing - add one or two carefully chosen 'extra' items and make an outfit of it".

    That made sense to me.

    My latest fabbing comment - a couple of people commented favourably on a pair of earrings I'd recently bought and one was asking me if they were "real" in fact. Nope - just costume jewellery and cost less than 10

    One has to "sift" a bit on comments from other people ITRW - as I realised when a friend recently told me "Black and brown don't go together" in an authoritative tone of voice. Much does she know then - as they certainly do - provided it's the right shade of brown and imo it's a sophisticated colour match at that. Though I do take her comments re appearance with a strong pinch of salt in the circumstances....
    ****************
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 12th Oct 18, 8:49 AM
    • 1,420 Posts
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I am very busy at the moment, but I am reading all of your posts every day.

    I have managed to hit my Holiday savings goal today. I now have just over 2,000 saved.

    I now have to raise as much as money possible for my spending money and for any financial outlays that happen in the next 6 months that are not predictable but essential.

    It is amazing that I do not have to put my central heating on yet, because it is so warm here in London at this time of year. It is helping me to save money each week.

    I went to my local Odeon cinema yesterday to watch A Simple Favour again and enjoyed it even more 2nd time around. I had to use up my Groupon Odeon voucher and yesterday was the expiry date.

    I had Ultrasound on both of my shoulders. There is wear and tear in the tendons in both shoulders and my right shoulder has calcification starting in the bone that connects my shoulder to my collarbone.

    I have another busy weekend planned, as my sister H is in London this weekend. We are going to have lunch together today. Tomorrow is another family birthday celebration in a restaurant for her older granddaughter's 16th birthday.
    • silvasava
    • By silvasava 12th Oct 18, 12:48 PM
    • 3,937 Posts
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    silvasava
    Sugarbaby - well done on your saving! Wishing you a fab holiday too.
    Just seen some of the photos of Eugenie's wedding. Thought her dress was beautiful - classic, elegant and understated and suited her body shape. The emerald & diamond tiara and earrings just added that pop of colour.
    Mind you I did think some of the guests needed to look in the mirror before they left the house (miaow!)
    What were your thoughts ladies?
    Small victories - sometimes they are all you can hope for but sometimes they are all you need - be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle
    • humptydumptybits
    • By humptydumptybits 12th Oct 18, 1:08 PM
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    humptydumptybits
    Sugarbaby - well done on your saving! Wishing you a fab holiday too.
    Just seen some of the photos of Eugenie's wedding. Thought her dress was beautiful - classic, elegant and understated and suited her body shape. The emerald & diamond tiara and earrings just added that pop of colour.
    Mind you I did think some of the guests needed to look in the mirror before they left the house (miaow!)
    What were your thoughts ladies?
    Originally posted by silvasava

    I agree, her dress was beautiful and really suited her but to be honest she looked so happy, a truly radiant bride, that I think she would have looked lovely in a bin bag.
    • moneyistooshorttomention
    • By moneyistooshorttomention 12th Oct 18, 1:55 PM
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    moneyistooshorttomention
    Not had a look yet - as my viewpoint = royalty schmalty

    Anything has got to be better than that badly fitting dress on Meghan.

    Guests looking in the mirror silvasava??? Not checked yet - but I have a suspicion I know what you mean......

    One of the things I am finding hard personally is finding suitable role models as to "how to" dress - ie elegant/suitable to person concerned/etc/etc - as this is SO not the norm for our country and it is very difficult indeed to find people I think "Yep...they've got it right...I think I'll copy this/that/the other from them" I know I don't have many original thoughts in my mind (like most of us then....) and so am looking to think "Right - just do this/that/the other like they do and that will look good".

    It does make you wonder "Am I being a right b*tch?" when you think "Nope - needs to lose weight/needs to throw that item of clothing out/needs to match clothes better/etc/etc" and you think "I don't think that is the case - it's just that so many people honestly don't make the best of themselves. So where ARE all these people to copy/think they've got it just right then??". That is a genuine question - as I'd honestly like to think "Right - if I have a figure like them (as near as)/got my hair like them (ditto)/dress like them = Sorted".
    Last edited by moneyistooshorttomention; 12-10-2018 at 1:58 PM.
    ****************
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th Oct 18, 2:38 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Hello everyone.

    SUgarbaby. So glad to hear that you are finally getting some answers and the appropriate treatment, hope it all goes well for you and that your health continues to improve. And well done on your holiday savings. That's brilliant.

    I'm afraid I'm having a fibro flare today, mainly my legs and feet. My muscles feel like they are screaming in rebellion. The acupuncturist did the backs of my knees today rather than the front so I'm guessing it's triggered some kind of after affects.

    Releasing my chakras innit or some such hippy voodoo. Lol. I'll let you know tomorrow if it's worked. In the meantime I've gone back on to the CBD oil. It tastes utterly vile and makes me want to gag but it seems to help with pain relief.

    My only recourse for now is to rest them and keep them warm, so it's a sofa afternoon. I shall read, watch a film, maybe do a bit of handsewing. I did do a major shop at Aldi this morning so I'm all stocked up with nice eats. The house is a tip but there's only me today so no worries. My diary is clear fir the next couple of days so I can rest and potter.

    Money.....try googling the "Best Dressed Women of All Time". As you might deduce some of them are long dead but their style is timeless and still relevant for the 21st century. Also try Something like "Elegant Women over 50".

    Without meeting you in person, knowing your shape, colouring etc it's hard to give specific advice. I think the trick is if you can identify your own unique body shape, preferred colour choices etc and then find someone in the public eye whose style you admire and who resembles you a little. Or at least whose style might suit you with a few tweaks. I don't think it works if you just slavishly copy someone but you can maybe capture the essence of their style but with a few changes to suit you.

    Oops plumber has just texted me, he's on his way. Back later. Damn. I so wanted a rest.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 12-10-2018 at 3:31 PM.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 13th Oct 18, 12:48 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Good morning lovely ladies.

    Just having a little break. I have been sorting and decluttering this morning. I have loaded some unwanted paintings and mirrors into the car ready for the charity shop on Monday. Very heavy and now my back aches so now a little rest is needed. Luckily they have some nice strapping men there the other end who will unload for me. I am hoping to go through the linens later today and maybe a quick sweep through my wardrobe.

    My legs feel much better today, must have been side effects of the acupuncture. Anyway my knees feel good.

    It looks like the new boiler is going to be a very dirty, messy, complicated job. I'm having all the old water tanks ripped out so it's not a straight boiler swap. Plumber says it will take around 3 to 4 days so I have decided to book a little holiday. It will be far more pleasant for me and quicker and easier (and hopefully cheaper) for the plumber. I shall stay fairly local so I can still be on hand to answer any questions if they hit any unforeseen snags.

    I can combine my mini break with some sightseeing, a couple of salon treatments and some Christmas shopping. Should be fun. Just waiting for him to give me a date then I can look for somewhere nice to stay. I am hoping now it's off season there might be some good deals.

    Hope you all have a lovely weekend. There's a very warm wind, almost like the sirocco you get in Spain, but the forecast isn't very good at all for tomorrow. Good job I had the guttering fixed.
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