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  • FIRST POST
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
    • 10,270Posts
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    lessonlearned
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings
    • #1
    • 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings 1st Jan 18 at 11:51 AM
    Good Morning my Lovelies.

    And welcome to the new bright and shiny Frump to Fab Thread.

    First of all a very big hello and welcome to everyone, newbies, lurkers and returners....and those undecided.

    Second let me wish you all !!!8220;Happy New Year!!!8221;.

    Let!!!8217;s rock this one!!!!

    Well now where do we start this year. We have quite a history here now don!!!8217;t we. I was thinking this morning about how the thread has developed so for the newbies......a brief potted history.

    A few years ago my son took a photo of me. I was horrified. I burst into tears. I could hardly believe my eyes at the image before me. But.......as we know the camera doesn!!!8217;t lie and I couldn!!!8217;t argue with what That image revealed.

    I went upstairs and stood in front of a full mirror and allowed the awful truth to sink in........never mind frump, I looked like a bag lady.

    In my defence.......it was not down to laziness, far from it. I was caring for my semi Paralysed terminally ill husband. My days were full on with caring duties. I scarcely had a spare minute, it was all I could do to shower and brush my teeth sometimes.

    All very noble of course but I had completely neglected myself in the process. I had forgotten the simple golden rule........we cannot care for others if we don!!!8217;t care for ourselves. We cannot give love, if we don!!!8217;t treat ourselves with love.

    How many women forget this simple fact. In our busy lives as mothers, daughters, sisters how often to we put ourselves last on that never ending !!!8220;to do list!!!8221;.

    As I stood and looked in that mirror I realised the folly of my ways and I resolved to !!!8220;do something!!!8221;. I wasn!!!8217;t sure what exactly but I knew I had to make a start somewhere.

    So I started the first Frump to Fab Thread and, as they say, the rest is history. What started as a simple diary to help me make the necessary changes to get me out of !!!8220;Frumpdom!!!8221; has become a wonderful friendship group of likeminded women.

    Yes some of us are of a certain age but not all. Frumpdom is not the preserve of the middle aged woman who has !!!8220;let herself go!!!8221;. Becoming a frump can happen to anyone, young women, even teenagers.

    But here!!!8217;s the good news .......it!!!8217;s never too late to reverse the process, never too late to ditch the frump, never too late for the caterpillar to turn into a beautiful butterfly or for the ugly duckling to turn into a graceful and elegant swan.

    There are no rules to this thread except one.

    Kindness please........we don!!!8217;t judge anyone here, we don!!!8217;t get into futile pointless arguments, we don!!!8217;t make nasty comments, we don!!!8217;t indulge in sarcasm, we don!!!8217;t bully others, we don!!!8217;t play mind games and we don!!!8217;t try to score points by making others feel small.

    So all that being said .....if you are ready to change your stars and become that alluring goddess you always longed to be, if you want to reclaim the energy and vitality that was once yours but has somehow disappeared then this is place for you.

    Let!!!8217;s all get fabulous.

    Lesson no 1.

    Wear perfume, every day. Don!!!8217;t save it for best. Get out all those unused smellies lurking in the back of the bathroom cabinet or bedside drawer and start using them.

    Smell divine......and fabulousity will follow. That!!!8217;s a promise.

    A women who smells gorgeous is gorgeous. It!!!8217;s the first step on your journey.

    Right I!!!8217;m off to bathe in a sea of perfumed bubbles but first ..........

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 24-01-2018 at 10:02 AM.
Page 48
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 10th Jul 18, 3:53 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    Firstly, Congratulations to LL on the birth of Alex. I hope that your DIL is beginning to slowly recover from her cesarean section. Enjoy being a Granny.

    Wayne and I went shopping in his local Lidl yesterday. It was a new experience for both of us, sharing a trolley and acting more like a couple. I only normally get a few items when I hop in my local Lidl, but as Wayne was going to be taking me home and I would not have to lug bags of shopping home, I bought some cupboard items and fresh fruit that was much cheaper in Lidl. Of copourse he insisted on paying for all of my shopping with his shopping.

    I am so glad that the sunshine is finally at much more manageable levels today. It has been difficult especially the hot nights, but today is noticeably cooler.
    • joho
    • By joho 10th Jul 18, 3:58 PM
    • 3,937 Posts
    • 13,628 Thanks
    joho
    Speaking of unusual sights I have been trying to find out the water levels of Lady Bower Reservoir, whether or not you can see the village yet. When water levels are really low you can sometimes see the old village that they flooded when they created the dam. :
    Originally posted by lessonlearned
    I came across your post and then this article. Not exactly what you were after about Ladybower, but thought you might find it interesting:

    https://qz.com/1324190/photos-a-heat-wave-in-the-uk-is-revealing-evidence-of-ancient-structures/
    There - in that place; they're - they are; their - owned by them.
    If you have nothing constructive to say, just move along.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 10th Jul 18, 6:19 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Thank you Joho. That is very interesting.

    Just a quick update. DIL and Alex (and Daddy of course) are all home now. Phew.

    Hasta Manana.
    • sashybo
    • By sashybo 10th Jul 18, 8:34 PM
    • 2,789 Posts
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    sashybo
    Congratulations on your new grandson LL. I hope your DIL recovers well, very quick discharge from the hospital!

    I have wasted the day with a bit of a hangover after going out with DH yesterday. I really can't handle drinking anymore, I was sick afterwards & that's the second time in 2 months it's happened after drinking over several hours. I think I need to accept that my body doesn't like that much alcohol.

    I had a stressful stay with the outlaws last week for several reasons. MIL was very grabby with DS again & didn't like that he kept clinging to me (it's just a phase he's in due to his age!). She kept taking him away from me & getting annoyed when he cried for me.

    DS wasn't sleeping properly as the room he was in was too hot & there were no curtains or anything either. He was waking at 5:30am every morning with the daylight (we have a blackout blind at home) & we had to move him into our room as it was cooler. So then none of us were getting a good sleep. FIL was then moaning at DS crying so early every morning.

    So basically came home more stressed than when we went away! At least DS mostly enjoyed himself. He met the horse that lives in a neighbouring field to the outlaws house & was so delighted when the horse snorted at him & blew over his feet. He just adores animals.
    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

    PAD started 27/01/09 - 10,677 extra paid off debt. Total Debt paid off 52,115
    Loan 1865.01, CC 0% BT 965, Car loans 21,866.53

    Have a Debt Free Diary to try & keep spending in check.
    • Moll
    • By Moll 11th Jul 18, 9:10 AM
    • 235 Posts
    • 1,780 Thanks
    Moll
    Maman
    . Have you seen the blue post box in Windsor? Apparently there was a short-lived experiment in having blue boxes for airmail and this one survives.


    I'd also recommend the John Soane Museum. That's a quirky collection and the house is interesting too. They have Hogarth's Rakes Progress there. Also the Wallace Collection just behind John Lewis in Oxford Street, another lovely building with a good collection including the Laughing Cavalier. Then there's the Geffrye which is in a series of alms houses showing interiors from the 1600s to the present.

    Ive seen the blue one in Windsor , but didnt know why till you explained it ,,,,,,,,,the mystery is solved
    Been in the John Soane , thats fabulous for anyone who hasnt seen it , The Geffrye is a new one for us , we'll definitley have a look at that ,thankyou x
    I
    • maman
    • By maman 11th Jul 18, 3:33 PM
    • 18,072 Posts
    • 108,186 Thanks
    maman
    I came across your post and then this article. Not exactly what you were after about Ladybower, but thought you might find it interesting:

    https://qz.com/1324190/photos-a-heat-wave-in-the-uk-is-revealing-evidence-of-ancient-structures/
    Originally posted by joho

    I saw this yesterday on a similar subject. The detail is fascinating.


    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lancashire-44786388

    DS wasn't sleeping properly as the room he was in was too hot & there were no curtains or anything either. He was waking at 5:30am every morning with the daylight (we have a blackout blind at home) & we had to move him into our room as it was cooler.
    Originally posted by sashybo

    I feel your pain! What a shame to go away and come back feeling stressed.


    DD1 always had blackout blinds on DGD1's bedroom windows but that's always been a bone of contention with me and DD2. When DGD2 stayed with us I always blacked out the windows and she slept right through including until about 8.00 a.m. At home she woke up before 6! I didn't have proper blackout blinds so I just wedged beach towels into the sash window. When she was tiny I also put her in a dark room for her daytime nap when she was with me. Interfering grandmother! You, too, can become one LL!!


    I can't say I've done a huge amount of fabbing although it's so easy to dress with the warm weather. All I've been wearing is underwear and a loose fitting dress. I have been careful with skincare though as I'm determined to keep my tan looking good for as long as possible with loads of body lotion. I'll add a touch of fake tan when it starts to fade.


    Still baking hot and sunny here.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 11th Jul 18, 11:44 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Noooooo I will never be an interfering MIL. I have sworn an oath.....

    I have been married twice. Both MILs were the MILs from hell and I have vowed I will never, never, never become like them. I will keep my lips sealed at all times, and my thoughts to myself. The only time I would ever say anything is if I thought lives were at stake.....other than that they can sort things out for themselves.

    Well my son and his little family are home now and doing ok. Tired of course but they are young and still have plenty of adrenaline to fuel them.....they will be fine. They have DILs parents around for several weeks to cook, clean and just be a couple of extra pairs of hands. I did some shopping today for them. They are managing to get a few naps in when the baby sleeps. DIL is sore and in pain of course but she is managing to feed the baby herself, although she needs help because of her stitches etc. But I think she is doing remarkably well.

    He really is gorgeous......well, in the immortal words of Mandy Rice Davis "I would say that wouldn't I.

    He is very long like my DS2 (his uncle) was as a baby, so he is obviously going to be tall like the English side of the family, rather than short like the Venezuelan side. I guess he will eventually be dark haired and dark eyed.....so tall, dark and very handsome, ha ha, and, if he inherits his parents brains, then he will be very smart too.

    Ok no more granny boasting......

    One thing they have done.

    As you know there may or may not be a genetic component to my husband's illness. We will never really know until or unless either of my sons becomes symptomatic. Genetic testing is a complete waste of time because there is insufficient research into which genes maybe the problem. They know of a few but not all, the research is still very much in its infancy, so even if the boys were tested the results would be inconclusive.

    What we do know is that in the future it is stem cells which will hold the key to either curing or containing the condition. DS and DIL have therefore decided to harvest some of the little ones stem cells, just in case. My boys might not get sick themselves but that is not to say they might not be carriers.

    It was a simple and painless Procedure, cells are simply extracted from the umbilical cord. I think they have been extremely wise. They paid privately, it cost 2k. It might just be the best investment they ever make.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 11-07-2018 at 11:49 PM.
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 12th Jul 18, 10:48 AM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I have only been married once and my MIL was always quite horrible to me. She only changed when my ex husband got married again and she found his 2nd wife not to her liking in a very big way, so suddenly she wanted to be friends with me, but it was too late for us to have that kind of bond.

    I am a very hands off MIL. My daughter and son in law are mature adults and have to be free to live their lives how they choose. I have to bite my tongue even when I witness their mistakes. I only offer advice if my advice is sought by either of them.

    I am busy trying to build my relationship with Wayne. Whenever there is a misunderstanding between us, we are talking to each other to resolve any issues. We are quite different and we are still finding out just how we differ. All the time I am spending with Wayne has a big impact on my home life. I like being with my 2 adult children at home, but they are able to fend for themselves when I am at Wayne's. They finally met Wayne this week, but it was a brief meeting.

    Fraudsters tried to take just under 500 from my son's bank account through his PayPal account with 4 fraudulent transactions. Thank goodness he checked his PayPal account 2 days ago. I then took over notifying PayPal and his bank of what had happened. PayPal gave me excellent customer service with one phone call. All of his money will be repaid within 7 days. In fact the 1st amount of just over 195 from one of the transactions was repaid today. My son immediately changed his password to his PayPal account and transferred all of the money in his account to my bank account, so that I could put it into my linked savings account that can not be accessed by anyone but me and is not linked to my debit card.

    We will take a trip to his bank and change his current account to a student current account which will be more beneficial to him while he is a student at University.
    • moneyistooshorttomention
    • By moneyistooshorttomention 12th Jul 18, 11:22 AM
    • 16,167 Posts
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    moneyistooshorttomention
    LessonLearned - can I ask you about the thing you mentioned a couple of days back on here? That being how you "disguise" your eyebrows and eyelashes being a bit sparse? What do you do?
    ****************
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th Jul 18, 1:01 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Good morning lovely ladies....

    Well I finally got my hair cut. Don't like the way he styled it, it looks a bit old lady but I can funk it up a bit when I wash it. The cut looks good so that's what counts.

    Money.....I use eyebrow powders rather than pencils. I think they look more natural on me, less harsh than a pencil. I got mine from the body shop, comes in a neat little compact with its own little two way brush. I then set it with Kiko eyebrow designer gel mascara. This is clear, no colour, it just sets the powder and keeps any stray hairs in place. I think it looks very natural and less artificial then other methods I've tried. Takes a bit of practice but I think the powders give a nice effect.

    Mascara......during the day I keep it simple, one coat of Maybelline "sensational lash". It has fibres in so really does a good job of making them look thicker and longer. It can clump a bit so I find it useful to keep a spare clean brush or eyelash comb to tease the hairs and remove any clumps.

    For nightime I sometimes use an eyelash primer or base coat. It is white but It really makes my lashes look much thicker. Again by mabyelline.

    Personally I think as we get older black mascara and dark eyebrows can be a bit harsh and a bit aging. Maybe experiment a bit with browns or greys.

    I find the staff in both the body shop and kikos are really good. They will advise you on colours and demonstrate how to use the products. I know you live in deepest darkest Wales (I'm only jealous) but you can buy Kiko and body shop products online. And you can buy Maybelline in most large supermarkets, Superdrug etc.

    I have to say I find when applying products like eyebrow and eyelash enhancers, less is more. It is very easy to overdo it and look like a clown.

    I don't usually carry a large make up bag around with me so I keep a small pretty bag for touch ups. Lipstick, my little eyebrow powder kit, in the winter some blusher or bronzer, a small perfume atomiser, some dental tape and some mint tic tacs. My emergency kit for repairs.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th Jul 18, 1:31 PM
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    lessonlearned
    SUgarbaby.....I once had my current account debit card cloned. Luckily the bank spotted it and alerted me very quickly. I now keep very little money in my current account, like you I keep it in accounts that cannot be accessed by debit card.

    Well it sounds like Wayne is a reformed man...... glad to hear that you are so happy together. Shall I buy a hat.

    J2 has recently upped his efforts but he's still not red blooded or pro active enough for me. I can't be doing with feint hearted lovers. Shyness is no excuse!!! My husband could be shy at times but he was the kind of man who would not let shyness hold him back. He swept into my life like a tornado. Resistance was futile - not that I wanted to resist.

    I am afraid that's what I want from a man. An alpha male who knows my value and worth, ditherers need not apply.....I want to be hit by a thunderbolt like last time.

    J1 is still in regular contact but he knows there's no big romance, nor is there ever likely to be but he likes staying in touch. He lives a fair distance away so we are happy to be penpals and have the odd gossipy phone call.

    Actually he admits that he has been a bit of a lad in the past but he tells me that knowing me has helped him learn to appreciate women as people and not just objects. He says he finally gets that we have qualities that males don't have, such as intuition, people skills etc and he has come to see how valuable our "soft skills"and emotional intelligence can be. Apparently he has been putting all this new knowledge into practice and his love life is blossoming.

    Perhaps I should become a dating coach!!

    Right I'm off to Aldi's to stock up on healthy stuff.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 12-07-2018 at 1:35 PM.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th Jul 18, 3:01 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Just got back from Aldi.....picked up some of that Eau de toilette. No 1. Well at just 5.95 it would have been rude Not to.

    Well I have to tell you. This morning I popped into Primarni, loaded up a basket with some tops, and then though nah.....I don't need any, I have enough. And put them all back and walked out empty handed.

    Probably saved myself about 50. It must be the good Influence of the no buying clothes thread on the old style board. But as I walked around I thought I really don't NEED anything at the moment and none of the items were exactly showstoppers that I had fallen in love with, so I thought why bother....... Save your money for when you find something really sensational and Of better quality, rather than "it will do".

    Ladies don't we all deserve sooooo much better than "it will do".

    However, I did spend some money. I bought DIL a little present. A little spa pampering set from Superdrug. Lord knows when she will get the time for a pamper session, but it has some nice goodies, such as bath products, face masks, body creams etc. It will come in handy for when she gets a bit of time (when Alex start school maybe).

    I thought poor DIL, sore and uncomfortable, tired and emotional, everyone buys a new baby presents, but people rarely buy anything for the poor mum who does all the work. .
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 12th Jul 18, 5:37 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I just realised I forgot to mention that I went to my local Odeon cinema yesterday to watch Ocean's 8 and Whitney yesterday. I used 2 of my Groupon Odeon vouchers as they were due to expire yesterday. I had to allow my children to use the other 2 vouchers to watch films of their choice.

    I had 4 weeks to use the vouchers, but I have been so busy with Wayne, I had not been able to get to the cinema.

    Both films lived up to my expectations and for me both were a 9/10 film for very different reasons. I loved that Ocean's 8 had all female leads that were completely believable characters and that the film was lots of action, fun and great humour. Whitney was a really good documentary that made me feel so sad at all she had to suffer and that Whitney had to die at a relatively young age.

    LL to be fair to Wayne, he is not so much a reformed man as a man full of confidence. He finally believes that I do want a committed relationship with him, but I have also still got a deep need to be independent.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 12th Jul 18, 8:34 PM
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    chanie
    Hi fabbers,

    I started my new job this week. I have had a gentle settling in period and the people seem nice. I have also been wearing my new work wardrobe, which I have enjoyed. Although I have lost my fridays, I am hoping I can work more flexibly in the future, once I have settled in. My new work area is located in a busy high street, which has most of the major shops and banks. I can use my lunch breaks to do many of the errands I used to do on my Fridays, to claw back some time over the weekend.
    2018 challenge to save 1000
    Spend less - 934.63
    Live more - 1812.05
    My spending diary - Spend Less, Live More - a spending diary
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5576179
    • seven-day-weekend
    • By seven-day-weekend 13th Jul 18, 2:55 AM
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    seven-day-weekend
    Congratulations, LL!
    Member #10 of 2 savers club
    • Moll
    • By Moll 14th Jul 18, 1:41 AM
    • 235 Posts
    • 1,780 Thanks
    Moll
    LL Congratulations Hope Mum & Baby are doing good , Isnt it a wonderful feeling, So what are you , Nan , Nanny . Gran. Granny Grandma ,,,, Here we are Mammas. xxx
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 14th Jul 18, 8:40 AM
    • 1,336 Posts
    • 8,657 Thanks
    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    Chanie, I am glad to hear that you are settling into your new job. It will work really well for you working on a busy high street in terms of running errands, but I hope easy access does not make you more inclined to make impulse purchases.

    I had no access to my email service yesterday and it was so frustrating. Back to normal service today.

    Wayne let me down yesterday, when we had planned to spend the night together. I sent him a text letting him know exactly how I felt in no uncertain terms.

    I did a Focus Group on Thursday evening for 1 hour 30 minutes for which I received 50. It was a really positive experience. I am planning to go to the Caribbean on holiday next year, so I am saving to make this dream a reality. This 50 has gone into my holiday savings.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 14th Jul 18, 9:18 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Good morning lovely ladies.

    Hope you are all well and still enjoying the sun. It's a bit fresher here this morning. We had a bit of rain last night, not really enough but it has made adifference to the air quality this morning, less humid. It's going to get hot again later so I'm going to do a bit more sorting and packing this mornjng before it warms up too much, then a nice shady spot with a book this afternoon.

    Yes DS, DIL and LO are all doing well. Daddy is currently cuddling the baby in their garden, enjoying the gentle early morning sunshine. It will do them all good to get a bit of fresh air. Dil is feeling a lot more comfortable now.

    Chanie .....glad you are enjoying your new job. I always liked working in the city centre, and enjoying a stroll around the shops.

    Well I went for my acupuncture treatment yesterday. It's definitely working, I am sleeping really well and my aches and pains are definitely easing off a bit.

    Sugarbaby......how exciting about your Caribbean holiday, and well done on the 50. Every little helps.

    As for Wayne......well words fail me.

    Right time to get cracking.

    Hope you all have a lovely weekend.
    • maman
    • By maman 14th Jul 18, 1:07 PM
    • 18,072 Posts
    • 108,186 Thanks
    maman
    Good to hear about your new job chanie. I can see that it's hardly the right time to ask for flexi working when you've just arrived but it would be good for you to have some me time. Perhaps in September when the schools go back.


    Is there a South American name/ familiar name for a grandma LL? My brother's children always called theirs Mamgu which is the Welsh (sounds like 'mungee' in Welsh pronunciation) whereas my French niece uses Mamie and Papi.


    Will this be a family holiday to the Caribbean sugarbaby? Sounds really exciting. I've only been once on a cruise around various islands and I loved it.


    We've just booked to go to the cinema on Tuesday. It's the premier screening of the Spitfire film which DH has an historical interest in. Have you seen either the New York Library or the Happy Prince films sugar? i'm hoping there might be trailers so I can decide whether I fancy them. The reviews are good but you cant always go on those.


    I'm just keeping up with the basics of fabbing at the moment. I think it helped that I was 100% on top of everything before my holiday so hair, nails, feet etc. are all in good condition. I'm so pleased that I bought the 2 loose dresses while I was away. I've been constantly wearing those (and the similar one I bought in Weymouth last year). I really don't fancy anything around my waist or my legs in the heat.


    Still 25 and sunny here.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 14th Jul 18, 7:49 PM
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    • 10,698 Thanks
    chanie
    maman well done on keeping up with your fabbing, maintenance is so much easier than having to start again.

    Lessons pleased that your DS and DIL are settling into family life with the baby.

    Sugar how exciting to be planning a trip to the Caribbean.

    I am getting prepared for the holiday. I had my waxing and threading done this morning and started packing. I ordered a few bits from the Next sale which I picked up today. This included a jumpsuit, which will be nice for the holiday. Both me and OH pack lightly when we go away, so packing shouldnt take too long.
    2018 challenge to save 1000
    Spend less - 934.63
    Live more - 1812.05
    My spending diary - Spend Less, Live More - a spending diary
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5576179
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