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  • FIRST POST
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings
    • #1
    • 1st Jan 18, 11:51 AM
    Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings 1st Jan 18 at 11:51 AM
    Good Morning my Lovelies.

    And welcome to the new bright and shiny Frump to Fab Thread.

    First of all a very big hello and welcome to everyone, newbies, lurkers and returners....and those undecided.

    Second let me wish you all !!!8220;Happy New Year!!!8221;.

    Let!!!8217;s rock this one!!!!

    Well now where do we start this year. We have quite a history here now don!!!8217;t we. I was thinking this morning about how the thread has developed so for the newbies......a brief potted history.

    A few years ago my son took a photo of me. I was horrified. I burst into tears. I could hardly believe my eyes at the image before me. But.......as we know the camera doesn!!!8217;t lie and I couldn!!!8217;t argue with what That image revealed.

    I went upstairs and stood in front of a full mirror and allowed the awful truth to sink in........never mind frump, I looked like a bag lady.

    In my defence.......it was not down to laziness, far from it. I was caring for my semi Paralysed terminally ill husband. My days were full on with caring duties. I scarcely had a spare minute, it was all I could do to shower and brush my teeth sometimes.

    All very noble of course but I had completely neglected myself in the process. I had forgotten the simple golden rule........we cannot care for others if we don!!!8217;t care for ourselves. We cannot give love, if we don!!!8217;t treat ourselves with love.

    How many women forget this simple fact. In our busy lives as mothers, daughters, sisters how often to we put ourselves last on that never ending !!!8220;to do list!!!8221;.

    As I stood and looked in that mirror I realised the folly of my ways and I resolved to !!!8220;do something!!!8221;. I wasn!!!8217;t sure what exactly but I knew I had to make a start somewhere.

    So I started the first Frump to Fab Thread and, as they say, the rest is history. What started as a simple diary to help me make the necessary changes to get me out of !!!8220;Frumpdom!!!8221; has become a wonderful friendship group of likeminded women.

    Yes some of us are of a certain age but not all. Frumpdom is not the preserve of the middle aged woman who has !!!8220;let herself go!!!8221;. Becoming a frump can happen to anyone, young women, even teenagers.

    But here!!!8217;s the good news .......it!!!8217;s never too late to reverse the process, never too late to ditch the frump, never too late for the caterpillar to turn into a beautiful butterfly or for the ugly duckling to turn into a graceful and elegant swan.

    There are no rules to this thread except one.

    Kindness please........we don!!!8217;t judge anyone here, we don!!!8217;t get into futile pointless arguments, we don!!!8217;t make nasty comments, we don!!!8217;t indulge in sarcasm, we don!!!8217;t bully others, we don!!!8217;t play mind games and we don!!!8217;t try to score points by making others feel small.

    So all that being said .....if you are ready to change your stars and become that alluring goddess you always longed to be, if you want to reclaim the energy and vitality that was once yours but has somehow disappeared then this is place for you.

    Let!!!8217;s all get fabulous.

    Lesson no 1.

    Wear perfume, every day. Don!!!8217;t save it for best. Get out all those unused smellies lurking in the back of the bathroom cabinet or bedside drawer and start using them.

    Smell divine......and fabulousity will follow. That!!!8217;s a promise.

    A women who smells gorgeous is gorgeous. It!!!8217;s the first step on your journey.

    Right I!!!8217;m off to bathe in a sea of perfumed bubbles but first ..........

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 24-01-2018 at 10:02 AM.
Page 33
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 3rd May 18, 8:13 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Chanie, no lasting damage, just a couple of bruises on my back and the weird lump under the graze on my right knee
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 4th May 18, 4:26 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Good afternoon lovely ladies....

    SUgarbaby.....hope you are fully recovered from your fall. Nasty. Good to see that you are singing again.

    Maman...... Before I forget I hope you have a lovely time at the wedding. I think I shall take a leaf out of your book and get busy with the fake tan., although I still have a nice colour from my trip. I am got out on Sunday and if the weather is going to be hot and sunny like they predict the. It would be nice to wear a sleeveless dress and go bare legged.

    I've been busy shampooing carpets today.....I am absolutely shattered now. Cook dinner and then relax.

    Hope you all Have a lovely weekend.
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 4th May 18, 8:34 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I am fully recovered from my fall.

    I went to see the play Mood Music at The Old Vic today. I had a free ticket. I was feeling quite tired so unfortunately I had a little nap at least twice when I was watching this play even though I was enjoying it.

    It is lovely to be able to just wear a t-shirt and a skirt, not layers of clothing because of the gorgeous sunshine here in London. I wore my pink framed Calvin Klein sunglasses again today.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 4th May 18, 11:15 PM
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    chanie
    Glad you recovered from your fall sugar.

    Me and OH enjoyed the London sunshine too today and went out for lunch. We had an appointment at the school beforehand where we were told that DS is dyslexic, but they dont like to use that term anymore. Personally, I think its easier to use the term dyslexic to refer to his difficulties rather than trying to explain how it affects him. At least DS can now get the help he needs.

    I was on election duty yesterday. Lots of people watching potential, but turnout was low, so it was relatively quiet. Although the sun has been out, it has been quite chilly, so I think people struggle with knowing what to wear.

    I forgot we have a bank holiday this weekend, so that was a nice surprise. What is everyone up to?
    2018 challenge to save 1000
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    • maman
    • By maman 7th May 18, 12:11 PM
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    maman
    Hope everyone's out enjoying the glorious sunshine.


    Wedding weekend went well and, as it happened, the sleeveless dress was a perfect choice. Most principal guests seemed to wear a dress with a white jacket and hat/fascinator but either had to put up with being hot and uncomfortable or took them off once the ceremony was over. I had my wrap with me but only needed it to walk back to the hotel at the end of the evening. Similarly heels: the vast majority of women took them off after the ceremony and had sandals or (as in my case) pumps to wear. Those women without were very envious.


    Unfortunate;y a few sneezes that had been hanging around me for days developed into a cold on Saturday morning. I perked up after a shower and paracetamol so trying my best to keep it at bay.


    We made a day of it yesterday, visited a NT property on the way home and enjoyed the countryside. I've done all the washing and unpacking but will hopefully get out for a bit of a walk later too.


    Hope you're all having a lovely day whatever you're up to. I just love the sunshine!
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 7th May 18, 3:13 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    Maman in the end you wore the perfect dress for the wedding you and your husband attended. It sounds as if you have both had a very good time this weekend.

    I have decided to return to Karaoke on Sundays now that the weather has improved, so I went last night. I did not bother to sing, as there were so many other good singers there and it was nice to just sit and enjoy the other singers talents. I had a very enjoyable evening.

    Wayne was there and he came over and started to talk to me and insisted on buying me a bottle of water, which I gratefully accepted. No surprise that Wayne would like us to resume our past relationship, but I am not willing to considering all of the ways in which he disappointed and disrespected me when we were in a relationship. I made it clear that as I have no hard feelings for Wayne, then we could be friends but no more.

    It has been more than 4 months since the last time that I saw Wayne and as I pointed out to him, that I have been having a happy life without him. He will never change and I am not willing to put up with his particular character flaws in a partner and lover, but a friendship between us could be possible. I will just have to see how it works out (or not).


    I am having a day at home just resting and relaxing and staying cool.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 7th May 18, 4:17 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Hello lovely ladies....what a glorious weekend.

    Maman. What luck with the weather for the wedding, your dress would have been perfect. You will have looked as cool as a cucumber, hope the cold picks up soon.

    SUgarbaby...had to laugh about your comments about Wayne, he's nothing if not persistent.....which reminds me, I had completely forgotten. J2 has been in touch again , and of course J1 is still being old faithful. I don't think J2 will ever deliver. Like you SUgarbaby I view them as friends not potential lovers. Neither of them really cut the mustard. J1 is sweet and kind but not really my type and J2 is just too feinthearted. I want a man with fire in his belly.

    "I'm holding out for a hero".

    Had a lovely weekend, lunch with a friend on Saturday and then dinner at my favourite bistro with the boys and their girls last night. DIL looked stunning. She is really blooming now.

    It's funny how, in a few short weeks, pregnant women can go from looking like death to looking like a goddess. She certainly knows how to make the most of herself. She wore black and her long thick black hair was piled up and held in place with beautiful hair clips. Then just a pair of huge yellow earrings. Her skin was glowing and her hair was so glossy. All those hormones!! She certainly turned heads. Everyone in the restaurant stopped to watch her as she walked To the table, proudly showing off her bump.

    It was a beautiful evening, I wore my blue silk dress, DS2s girlfriend wore a pretty little dress, she has lovely legs and a pale creamy skin. She is so English and dainty, very feminine and delicate. The two girls are so different, one typical fiery Latina and the other quiet and English but each in their own way are beautiful girls. I am glad my boys realise how lucky they are to have such lovely girls. They both looked as proud as Punch.

    Outside the restaurant we waited with DIL whilst DS1 fetched the car for her. We stood people watching. Oh the sights you see in hot weather........ girls showing far too much flesh and just ending up looking like ladies of the night and as for the young men. The kindest word is "clueless". And what is it with hipster beards.

    That is one fashion I shall be glad to see the back of. Even my boys have succumbed, one doesn't look too bad because he has a long thin face and so beards actually suit him, if he would trim it a bit more often.....but the other one!!! It makes him look 10 years Older than he is. Why.??

    What is even worse is that some middle aged men are copying the style.........

    I'm sorry but I think white beards are for Father Christmas.

    Had another offer on the house. Again I declined it because it was too low. Had some nice viewers on Saturday. They seem keen. Time will tell.

    Just loving this wall to wall sunshine.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 07-05-2018 at 4:21 PM.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 7th May 18, 4:37 PM
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    chanie
    I work with lots of youngish men with the hipster beards, I think the look awful, far too try hard.

    Lessons fingers crossed you get a suitable offer on your home soon.

    Sugar Wayne doesnt give up, does he?

    Maman pleased the wedding went well and that you enjoyed wearing your green dress.

    We have had a lovely sunny bank holiday weekend. It has been lovely to finally see some sun!
    2018 challenge to save 1000
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    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 8th May 18, 9:09 AM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    Honestly LL you have such a talent with words. I could not stop laughing out loud as I was reading your post

    Wayne cannot help himself. He is quite a typical Jamaican apart from the fact that he is still far too generous with his money. He gave me a 10 note on Sunday evening to buy myself a bottle of water with and absolutely refused to accept his 8.50 change from me. He also insisted on buying my next 2 bottles of water later in the evening from his own money. He would not allow me to pay for them from his change.

    He was very complimentary to me, which I really lapped up and he was very tactile with me as well, which I did not object to as we still have that very electric sexual chemistry. As soon as he held my hand, I got very vivid memories full of clarity of just how good a lover he was with me but I never let him become aware of my own feelings.

    Wayne still believes that he Loves me, but I just kept on pointing out to him that when you Love someone you do not treat them with disrespect. His ideas about being in love do not tally with my own. He also says he is not going to give up on us as no other woman has got under his skin before. He was going on about how much he misses me but I just said 'well you did not miss me when we were together'.

    He wanted us to spend time together yesterday, but I preferred to stick to my own plans of having a day of relaxation and rest.

    I have a Hospital appointment early afternoon and I will be going to Karaoke this evening.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 8th May 18, 11:24 AM
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    lessonlearned
    SUgarbaby.....Ah bless you. Wayne sounds a nice enough man but only you know what is or is not acceptable behaviour. You set the bar. I think of myself as a High Value Woman so won't compromise when it comes to men. Only the best will do ......

    Watching the way my sons treat their women has made me realise that not only had they learned respect and admiration for women from their father, but also from the way I expect to be treated. We have taught them well, they are good men and treat their women properly. They have both said they want the kind of relationship my husband and I had. Easy, relaxed, and fun but at the same time committed and serious.

    I do think it's up to us to set the boundaries - as indeed it is for men to do likewise. Men deserve respect and courtesy from women just as we do from men. Mutual respect is a two way street. My mantra has always been "better no relationship, than a bad relationship"

    J2 wrote to me again yesterday......

    I know he's keen but he is a quiet man, a bit shy and diffident. So whilst they are not exactly passionate love letters he does come over as a warm caring man. He is divorced and I think that may be part of the problem.......a bit over cautious. Entering into a new relationship takes a leap of faith. Not everyone can do it.

    Although he is a quiet man he is a bit of a high flyer, like my Late husband an IT professional, travelling a lot and he has recently been involved in a huge time sensitive project.

    For some reason I seem to attract cerebral, ambitious high flyers.

    However, whereas my husband was very cerebral, he was also flamboyant and gregarious. J2, on the other hand, is like a lot of IT people I have met, a bit "geeky" and lacking social confidence. Anyway he retires in September.....so perhaps he will have time for me then.

    At any rate I'm not holding my breath. He is currently recovering from surgery and then has one more big project to deliver by September. Ke Sera. If it is meant to happen, it will. If not, it won't. Maybe we will just get stuck in the "friend zone".

    Actually, I have the beginnings of a really good social life these days. I am getting out and about a lot more. I'm sure there are plenty more fish in the sea. I'm in no hurry. I'm not husband hunting. I doubt I would even live permanently with a man again. I have rather gotten used to living alone and do actually enjoy it. I relish my freedom now.

    But I would like to have a nice man in my life now and again. I don't mind being "on the shelf" as long as someone takes me down and dusts me occasionally.

    Anyway glorious day here.
    • maman
    • By maman 8th May 18, 12:21 PM
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    maman
    Fancy Wayne turning up again! He never gives up. I'm wondering whether he's excited by the challenge of you being unattainable sugarbaby. Still it's good to have compliments and pleased you enjoyed them but he's had so many chances I doubt he'll change.


    I may have mentioned my BIL before LL. He rushed into a relationship and then marriage after he was widowed. I wish he'd taken a leaf from your book and just enjoyed company and taken it slowly. As it is they're working out a way of managing, still in two houses and meeting up regularly for days out etc. I think h expected a compliant woman but she's been independent for a long time and won't give it up.


    I'm still dosed up with paracetamol but I've stopped sneezing so hopefully my cold is on the wane. We're going to a funeral this afternoon so not the best way to spend a sunny day.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 8th May 18, 5:00 PM
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    chanie
    Fancy Wayne turning up again! He never gives up. I'm wondering whether he's excited by the challenge of you being unattainable sugarbaby. Still it's good to have compliments and pleased you enjoyed them but he's had so many chances I doubt he'll change.
    Originally posted by maman


    I thought that too.


    Maman - hope you feel better.


    Lessons good for you for having a good social life and lots of nice things to look forward to. You certainly deserve it.
    2018 challenge to save 1000
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    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 8th May 18, 7:09 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    My appointment with the Rhuematology Doctor was time consuming. I had to wait more than an hour after my allotted time before I was seen.

    The Doctor gave me a prescription for Hydroxychloroquine. He also wanted me to have a steroid injection in my buttock by a specialist Nurse. When I tried to discuss why I was not keen to have the injection with the Doctor he was dismissive and did not listen to me.

    I had a conversation with the Nurse about the medicine I had been prescribed and the steroid injection. She listened to my concerns and she assumed that I had been diagnosed with Rhuematoid Arthritis, but I had to explain that I was yet to be diagnosed. The blood tests had confirmed that I had inflammation in my body but not what was causing the inflammation. I chose not to have the steroid injection. The Nurse was happy to not give me the injection after I explained my reservations to her. She did try to consult the Doctor, but he had already left. The Nurse gave me the number for the Rhuematology helpline so that I can ask for support in between appointments or if I have any queries I would like answered the same day.
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 10th May 18, 9:01 AM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I had a really enjoyable evening at Karaoke on Tuesday. I sang 4 songs

    1. Fever by Peggy Lee

    2. It's Now Or Never by Elvis

    3. Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You by Andy Williams

    4. Hurt So Good by Susan Cadogan

    I was supposed to go to a Jazz evening last night, but I decided to give it a miss as I was feeling quite exhausted.

    It is the last ever Parents Evening for my son at his Sixth Form this evening. His latest report shows that his increased study at home has improved his A Level results so far. His exams start on the 16th May. I am hoping that he achieves 3 A's as then he can accept his offer in the London University that is his 1st choice. Only time will tell.
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 11th May 18, 7:33 PM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    I got my Mandatory Reconsideration Notice and the decision to end my ESA claim stands. I will complete and post my Appeal tomorrow.

    My Housing Benefit has been suspended again.

    I have decided that I have to make a real effort to lose weight as I cannot continue to have hypertension and I do not want my enlarged heart to become worse.

    I am making sure that I apply my sunscreen on my face and my body before I go out to enjoy the sunshine.

    I am doing more walking as the Doctor advised me that I could not possibly do any damage to my heart or any other part of my body by increasing my walking every day. I hope that month by month I will be capable of doing more walking and will be able to do some form of exercise.

    I may not write about my fabbing efforts in detail at the moment, but I am always aware of making an effort before I leave my home even when I feel that I do not want to be bothered. So I use perfume every day and sometimes layer it with the matching body lotion and body powder. I wear either solid silver jewellery or solid gold jewerelly with my outfits. On occasion I will make the effort to paint my nails and my toenails.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 11th May 18, 9:35 PM
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    chanie
    SugarThats not good news about your ESA, but from your previous posts, not totally unexpected.
    I love walking, but dont often get to enjoy a nice leisurely stroll as more often then not, I am rushing around.
    2018 challenge to save 1000
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    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5576179
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 12th May 18, 10:10 AM
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    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    Chanie, I like to take a leisurely stroll rather than a brisk walk at the moment, but as I get fitter over the coming months I can change that to a brisk walk.

    This is the 1st year since I started doing Race for Life 6 years ago when 2 of my brothers were diagnosed with Cancer, that I have to think about trying to improve my fitness and overall health so that I can definitely take part.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th May 18, 9:48 PM
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    lessonlearned
    Guilty Pleasure Night!!!! Eurovision.

    Loving it, dancing around the living room to cheesy pop. What's not to like.....especially as there has been a distinct Game of Thrones vibe.

    Serbia and Denmark seem to be in competition for the best beard.

    SUgarbaby. So sorry to hear about your claim being denied. Keep fighting.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 12-05-2018 at 9:51 PM.
    • seven-day-weekend
    • By seven-day-weekend 13th May 18, 7:37 AM
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    seven-day-weekend
    Hi everyone! LessonLearned told me about this thread so here I am

    I have just (since January) lost two stone and look and feel so much better. I can wear clothes that look nice, instead of just those that fit, I can walk without feeling tired and my blood presusre and resting heart rate are way down. In fact the last two times I have taken it my bp has been normal, so I am going to ask my doc if I can come off the meds

    I have also been going to the gym, just 20 mins doing rolling hills on the treadmill makes me feel good and also gives me two Weightwatchers Activity Points . I try to go at least once a week. This is the first gym I have felt comfortable at. I have felt threatened and judged at others. I could not tell you why this one feels different, but it does. It is also the cheapest and I am not tied into a contract. All good.

    It's about time I got dressed, so see you all later
    Last edited by seven-day-weekend; 13-05-2018 at 7:45 AM.
    Member #10 of 2 savers club
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 13th May 18, 7:54 AM
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    lessonlearned
    Good Morning Lovely Ladies

    It's gone very quiet on here.....I hope it's because you are all still busy Being Fabulous.

    No backsliding allowed.

    Well now I'm up with the larks this morning, full of beans. This is about the 4th day in a row that I have woken naturally early, fully refreshed. I don't know what I'm doing differently but I am certainly enjoying it.

    I am not a natural early riser but when I do wake up early I often marvel on how lovely the mornings can be. Not managing to see the sunrises but even so I do enjoy the peace and early morning stillness.

    Do you remember a few months ago I set myself a challenge....."A Year to Change My Life". Well as you may gather, the changes have not been startling but I thought you might like an update.

    I have made a start by signing up for college and I have put my house on the market, but so far they are the only big changes.

    I have reduced the amount of TV, I have become far more selective in my viewing habits. I still need to tackle the amount of computer time so that's my next mini challenge.

    I have started getting a better social life but that is something else that also needs work.

    So over all some progress but "could do better". Time to up my game.

    So I have decided to resurrect my challenge and relaunch.

    Once more.

    Lights! Camera! Action!

    Roll 'Em.

    "A Year to change my Life, Take 2".
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