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  • FIRST POST
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 31st Dec 17, 7:35 PM
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    Mooloo
    Mooloo’s Managing it in 2018
    • #1
    • 31st Dec 17, 7:35 PM
    Mooloo’s Managing it in 2018 31st Dec 17 at 7:35 PM
    My previous threads here have been about my struggles etc bringing up my family and now my Granddaughter, building a business on little funds and a lot of faith.
    Titles suggested often are linked to my sewing, but this year I want to be different. No more Struggle!

    This year is all about Managing it!
    Getting on top of the hiccups and the pitfalls.
    Managing to say NO more often.
    Managing to cut my Debts.
    Managing to raise my Income levels.
    Managing to make my Business even better.
    Managing to block time for the things I want to do.
    Managing to create a better home life.
    Managing to raise above the fire fighting and being ready to tackle issues before the fire.

    So here is the start.
    I am due to go out celebrating the New Year this evening with my BF, and Welcome Home my DGD tomorrow.
    I will expand on my goals and plans over the next few days, and follow through the next 12 months.
    See you along the way.
    Without my fellow MSE!!!8217;ers I probably would have had a much tougher ride than I had.

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    Last edited by MSE Andrea; 08-05-2018 at 10:27 AM.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
Page 24
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 9th Apr 18, 3:06 PM
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    Mooloo
    Home! After a yuk drive took 4hours 20 Mina. M25 was stop start
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • ivyleaf
    • By ivyleaf 9th Apr 18, 6:21 PM
    • 5,940 Posts
    • 64,562 Thanks
    ivyleaf
    Glad to hear you're safely home! Reminds me of last time we drove to Greater Manchester - it usually takes about four hours from here, but it took seven.....all because of roadworks!
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 9th Apr 18, 7:32 PM
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    Mooloo
    So tired.
    All plans for now totally on hold. Staff wages etc done.
    I hope that they have a lot of cash in the tin to bank tomorrow as the bank balance is looking very dismal. My personal account is rather depleted too.
    I was expecting my Guardianship money in, but it wasn't. Maybe I have finally lucked out and they have decided not to grant me anything this year.
    I will find out eventually I suppose. Probably a letter in the post.
    My passport has arrived. Not that I know when I will be able to use it again.
    I am trying not to panic but I do feel a little worried how I am going to turn things back around again.
    Life will go on if course and somehow I will cope. I just don't know how at the moment.
    Cup of tea and then possibly an early night as I am feeling wiped out. I still have a mild sore throat and had it since Wednesday.
    I need to be at work tomorrow and also need to be up early as I have to drive Dgd to Biggests before work so an extra 24 Miles so a good 30 minutes extra travel before the work starts.
    For now the washing machine is on!
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 9th Apr 18, 8:11 PM
    • 58,773 Posts
    • 243,733 Thanks
    beanielou
    Try to not overdo it.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 10th Apr 18, 7:12 AM
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    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    I went to bed just after 8 0clock.
    I was up once for the loo. But I had some very disorienting dreams, where I had lost my memory and didn't know anyone or where I lived etc. Took several moments to realise it was only a dream when I woke up. My house feels very claustrophobic after being in an empty caravan for the last week. I think I am ready to declutter again!

    On the plus side I have my first cuppa from my teasmade and can get out of bed at a more leisurely pace, and no small people bounding up the corridor to wake me up. Dgd is still asleep. I will wake her in about 20 minutes when my joints have started to ease.
    I can breathe a small sigh of relief that the Guardian money is in the bank, a day late. But I am expecting that they will be reviewing it any time soon as it's usually done in March.
    I am in Overdraft with one of my personal accounts and near the limit on the business. I have a few invoices out standing so the first job when I get to work is to see what money I can bank.
    Today is the only day I will have staff this week. The Seamstress will be back to her Monday and Tuesday, and Biggest is on school Holidays. So I will have a smaller wage bill at least.
    I did do the wages, P60's etc last evening but not the accounts. They are on tonight's agenda.
    I haven't touched my Portuguese all week either, as my Kindle needed WiFi.
    So time to start my routines off over again.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • Savvy_Sue
    • By Savvy_Sue 10th Apr 18, 3:01 PM
    • 39,249 Posts
    • 36,205 Thanks
    Savvy_Sue
    Hi Mooloo, just to say there were a couple of interesting bits on Woman's Hour this morning, on Kinship Carers and teenagers.
    Still knitting!
    Completed: 1 adult cardigan, 3 baby jumpers, 3 shawls, 1 sweat band, 3 pairs baby bootees,
    1 Wise Man Knitivity figure + 1 sheep, 2 pairs socks, 2 hats, 2 balaclavas for seamen, 1 balaclava for myself, multiple poppies, 3 peony flowers, 4 butterflies ...
    Current projects: ready to decrease / decreasing on all parts of the mohair cardigan pattern! but moved onto wrist warmers for friends at Christmas ...
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 10th Apr 18, 7:27 PM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    Hi Mooloo, just to say there were a couple of interesting bits on Woman's Hour this morning, on Kinship Carers and teenagers.
    Originally posted by Savvy_Sue
    Thanks Sue, I will have a listen later.
    Just home and it's been a long day. First day back at work is always a tough one.
    Followed by a drive to collect Dgd. I was Supposed to babysit but my daughters friend arrived earlier than planned so I was able to come home. I should really have gone shopping for milk but I forgot, so I will only get one cup of tea tonight and one in the morning. Unless I drink black tea.
    I wanted to do a lot of jobs when I got home, but truthfully I am just too tired. I still have a sore throat and aches so I am going to rest and hope that tomorrow is a better day.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Apr 18, 7:38 PM
    • 58,773 Posts
    • 243,733 Thanks
    beanielou
    Have a rest.
    As you say tomorrow is a better day.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 11th Apr 18, 9:40 AM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    Three years ago today since Dad died. Today is my day for seeing Mum.
    Dgd will have to come with me while we food Shop and go somewhere for Lunch.
    I have just been talking to DS's ExGF about visiting the boys later, and she waffled on about her and DS trying again. Etc not the same story he is telling me. She said she had got him to see a counsellor so if that's true that will help him I hope.
    I have been writing my diary, trying to look for positive things and starting to reassess my mind as I need to find the positive things and turn it around again.
    I honestly felt like locking the shop up yesterday and not going back.
    I still have 18 months lease and bills and things to deal with so it's not an option. I need to find my way again today! Somehow I need that magic wand to help me make the mind shift, shift my energy up a gear, and double down to do what ever is necessary to move forward.
    Easier said than done of course.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 11th Apr 18, 1:12 PM
    • 58,773 Posts
    • 243,733 Thanks
    beanielou
    Hope that you can find your way again.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 11th Apr 18, 8:09 PM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    Confused Bunny here.
    We had a busy but good time with my Mum, although I think she was hiding her emotions well she had two large glasses of wine at lunch. She also kept trying to give me money all the time.
    After I went to Mums, and did our Aldi Shop Dgd and I went to see Dgs3 and dgs6.
    Erm I think that I will be making myself more present and given time restraints I will be going back on Sunday to help clean up.
    I am not happy with the state of the garden with black sacks months old and several deep outside the house, and the kitchen was rather a mess. I am going to have to help or I will loose my grandchildren again.
    Or should I say as well?
    I am ashamed of the way that woman lives and that my son has decided to go back there and it is still not acceptable.
    After a brief visit for the first time in about 16 months I am shocked.
    Unfortunately I am at work on my own for the next three days so Sunday will be the first time I can get back.
    BF offered to not come until tomorrow night now, and I am glad because my head is in "here we go again mode"
    At the same time I got an email from a Portuguese estate agent with a link to a 4 bed house in the Guarda area of Portugal near the Spanish Boarder.
    The Dream is !!!8364;40,000
    I definitely need to get the finances sorted out! So if eventually I have the savings I can actually go look at my dreams in the real world!
    I know, I don't have the proverbial pot at the moment.
    But seriously a 4 bed house with out buildings in a village with spectacular views, close to Spain and the river etc is exactly what I have been wanting and I ended up using all my money on the family instead.
    Maybe that's my motivation afterall?
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 11th Apr 18, 8:16 PM
    • 58,773 Posts
    • 243,733 Thanks
    beanielou
    Sorry to hear that things are still not good.

    I think your dream should be your motivation.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • thorsoak
    • By thorsoak 11th Apr 18, 8:46 PM
    • 5,814 Posts
    • 26,959 Thanks
    thorsoak
    Reality check here Mooloo - if you were to manage to get to Portugal - you would still be worrying yourself sick about the possibility of losing these grandchildren/twins 1 and 2 plus DS - not to mention worrying about how Biggest is coping. Could you go out to Portugal and shut yourself off from those emotions?

    If you could, then exercise the same cut offs over here. x
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 11th Apr 18, 8:48 PM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    Sorry to hear that things are still not good.

    I think your dream should be your motivation.
    Originally posted by beanielou
    Today has been a tough day in one way and a good in another.
    Food for thought.
    So I am back at the bottom of the rung, so I will have to find a way to get up to the next level.
    I need to help myself as well as my family. But I will have to come first!
    When I got the email tonight about the house I was excited because I knew that places were still available but sad that I am no longer in the position to go.
    One of these days I will get the email that I can respond to!
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 12th Apr 18, 7:19 AM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    forty thousand euros! That's what all those numbers should say!

    Thoresoak, I am so far away from my dreams this year that it probably doesn't make any difference anymore!
    Biggest will cope. The scan shows just one baby. If she looks after her health and slows down her life she will be fine. She is taking steps to do that.
    I am not sure if I will ever stop worrying, but as pointed out to me often enough I cannot do anything else for them if they don't want to help themselves.
    DS was told yesterday that I am not making enough money and I will have to close my business when the lease runs out. Twin1 was told along side her partner and his family on Sunday.
    Twin2 was told over the phone. So they all now know (again) that I don't have any money left. Can't give what I don't have.
    They will have to sink or swim now.
    I intend to go back to the house at the weekend and see if I can do some clearing up along side of her, and him!, and I will be telling them that they are in deed jeopardising their family and that they are putting me in an awful position because I would have probably called Social myself yesterday if I had not been family, and that I still will, for the boys sake if I don't see an improvement every week. I am not doing them any favours by not highlighting the issues, and if they don't respond this weekend then I will have no choice but to protect the boys. The reality is plain to see. They are not coping.
    I need to get up, wake Dgd, and get her to Biggest and back here before 9.10am
    I am on my own in the shop for the next two days.
    There is a lot to do
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 12th Apr 18, 11:19 AM
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    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    I am a wreck today. I talked to Biggest and my Mum before work, and I decided that I cannot live with myself if I don't call the Health Visitor today and raise my concerns. Although that is proving more difficult to do than I expected. The world lives by answer machines and messages.
    I am struggling to be bright and cheerful and serve customers and I have yet to start sewing.
    I may be doing the best or the worst thing ever depending on who's opinion it is. But I see obviously they are not coping and I don't think it is fair to the children. My Son and the GF are big enough and ugly enough to look after themselves and if they want to live in squalor then so be it. But those children deserve better.
    I am waiting for the Health Visitor to return my call.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • tiredmum2
    • By tiredmum2 12th Apr 18, 11:51 AM
    • 285 Posts
    • 3,943 Thanks
    tiredmum2
    "I may be doing the best or the worst thing ever depending on who's opinion it is. But I see obviously they are not coping and I don't think it is fair to the children. My Son and the GF are big enough and ugly enough to look after themselves and if they want to live in squalor then so be it. But those children deserve better."

    If you are so concerned about these children you should be calling Social Services or speaking to your social worker immediately 1 day for a child to be living in squalor is too many
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 12th Apr 18, 1:40 PM
    • 10,150 Posts
    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    "I may be doing the best or the worst thing ever depending on who's opinion it is. But I see obviously they are not coping and I don't think it is fair to the children. My Son and the GF are big enough and ugly enough to look after themselves and if they want to live in squalor then so be it. But those children deserve better."

    If you are so concerned about these children you should be calling Social Services or speaking to your social worker immediately 1 day for a child to be living in squalor is too many
    Originally posted by tiredmum2
    I am waiting for them to get back to me!
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • Mooloo
    • By Mooloo 12th Apr 18, 6:05 PM
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    • 50,781 Thanks
    Mooloo
    Not a very productive day. Not surprised really.
    Call didn't come back, I rang again.
    Busy up and down serving. Small jobs tackled.
    Blinds back again as some how they have managed to unstring them!
    Fittings done for wedding and proms today.
    One lady said kindly that I have an excellent reputation in the town and highly thought of. Could not have come at a better time really.
    My spirits are quite low with everything else going on.
    Forms have arrived to review my allowance. Just papers in the post this time no actual visit.
    Got a fitting booked in at 7 pm and can't get a response from them to confirm so I am going to have to go back just in case they do turn up. I shall be really annoyed if they don't.
    Just time for a reheated dinner then!
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
    • Little Miss Winner
    • By Little Miss Winner 12th Apr 18, 10:48 PM
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    • 136,050 Thanks
    Little Miss Winner
    Not a lot to offer - other than a virtual hug.

    Did the HV not get back to you at all, maybe they will first thing in the morning.

    For what it is worth I think you have made the right choice by contacting the HV. I would have to do the same thing i'm afraid - son or not. Like you say they are adults and can look after themselves, the kiddies cant.

    Hope you get some rest tonight xx
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