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  • FIRST POST
    • whattodo7
    • By whattodo7 8th Dec 17, 2:50 PM
    • 8Posts
    • 2Thanks
    whattodo7
    Don't like my dad's partner
    • #1
    • 8th Dec 17, 2:50 PM
    Don't like my dad's partner 8th Dec 17 at 2:50 PM
    I should probably begin by saying, I appreciate my dadís lovelife is none of my business and he is free to date whoever he chooses. I donít wish to tell him what to do and that is why I have never expressed to him what I am about to write here. However, as his child it is difficult for me that I have formed a negative opinion about his girlfriend and I could therefore use a fresh outsider perspective.

    My dad is a great guy, very laid back, physically active, sociable etc. He is in his early sixties and was fortunate enough to be able to retire early with a large lump sum to ensure he lives the rest of his life comfortably.

    Heís been with his girlfriend for two years. Unlike my dad, who enjoys hiking and the outdoors, his girlfriend is obese and a smoker.

    Prior to meeting my dad she has lived her life on benefits and has accrued debt. She gets carers allowance for her mildly disabled adult daughter. My dad pays for everything in the relationship, absolutely everything for both his girlfriend and daughter. They basically come as a package.

    She likes to spend 24/7 with my dad, complaining of loneliness if he going fishing with his male friends for an afternoon.

    They have recently been getting into blazing rows because she wants him to sell his house and buy a new house with her and her daughter. She has no assets herself to bring. My dad doesnít want to move though. He has lived in his house for over 30 years and is happy there. He feels it would be better for them to live separately for the time being because he feels she should have a separate place for her daughter.

    For the past year she has also been getting into blazing rows with him about getting married. She told him she is going to think of a deadline for when he needs to have proposed to her by. My dad does not want to get married though to anyone. However, things then all came to a head and I thought they were going to split but instead they have come to an agreement never to mention marriage or moving in together ever again. Can this work?

    From my perspective, my dad so far has not really enjoyed his retirement. He is basically like a carer to his girlfriend doing menial tasks for her. I envisioned him spending his retirement travelling the world and doing expeditions.
    Last edited by whattodo7; 08-12-2017 at 2:53 PM.
Page 3
    • Tabbytabitha
    • By Tabbytabitha 4th Jan 18, 4:38 PM
    • 2,614 Posts
    • 4,323 Thanks
    Tabbytabitha
    They do, if there is genuine concerns on motive of new partner or concerns for parent well being
    Originally posted by svain

    Would that give the parent the right to question and interfere with a middle aged son's relationship as well?
    • svain
    • By svain 4th Jan 18, 5:49 PM
    • 359 Posts
    • 630 Thanks
    svain
    Would that give the parent the right to question and interfere with a middle aged son's relationship as well?
    Originally posted by Tabbytabitha
    If i felt there was a suggestion of abuse or manipulation, then of course. Burying your head in the sand is worse.
    Last edited by svain; 04-01-2018 at 5:54 PM.
    • Tabbytabitha
    • By Tabbytabitha 4th Jan 18, 9:28 PM
    • 2,614 Posts
    • 4,323 Thanks
    Tabbytabitha
    If i felt there was a suggestion of abuse or manipulation, then of course. Burying your head in the sand is worse.
    Originally posted by svain
    One good thing about burying your head in the sand is that it keeps your nose out of other people's business.!!!128521;
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