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  • FIRST POST
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 4th Dec 17, 5:38 PM
    • 125Posts
    • 299Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    Time to turn this around
    • #1
    • 4th Dec 17, 5:38 PM
    Time to turn this around 4th Dec 17 at 5:38 PM
    I had my lightbulb moment recently. Despite the fact I have a good job in an industry that means I should know better, I've got myself into a bit of a pickle. The goal for the next 2 years will be getting out of debt, out of the consolidation trap and into a good position re savings. The 2 years after that will be aimed at saving for a house deposit. My debts are:-

    HSBC loan £7872.48
    Virgin credit card £4019.39
    MBNA credit card £2825
    Car loan £5011
    Tax bill £139

    Grand total of £21,266.47 - I realise this doesn't add up please see post dated 18/12/17 for explanation!

    Once Christmas is out of the way and I've paid the tax bill, which is due at the end of the year, I've worked out a budget as follows:-

    Rent, household bills, food 1060
    HSBC loan 238.56
    MBNA CC 75
    Virgin CC 400
    Car 94.89
    Car ins 29.08
    Car service & repairs 50
    Contact lens scheme 26
    Entertainment 50
    Christmas & birthdays 80
    Clothes/shoes 50
    Hair 40
    Holiday fund 60
    Emergency fund 50

    This comes to £2303.53, my nett wage is £2,305. I'm throwing all I can at the Virgin balance until I've paid the spending part off, £1200 of this is on 0% until November. Then I'll concentrate on the MBNA, then the HSBC loan. Then I'll reevaluate. The HSBC loan is 7% APR, I'm halfway through paying that so most of the interest has probably been paid. I've set up the piggy accounts for car maintenance, holidays and emergencies. I've been in the habit of saving for Christmas and birthdays all year for some time now. Here goes!
    Last edited by FiscalPickle; 18-12-2017 at 4:58 PM. Reason: Amending total debt figure
Page 8
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 4th Jul 18, 11:39 AM
    • 125 Posts
    • 299 Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    A friend has suggested that a group of us to go a spa for the day towards the end of summer, the problem is it is over £100. I could in theory find the money, but it would mean paying that much less off the Virgin CC. I'm trying to reconcile wanting to be DF with having a social life and friends, a lot of the time we do low or no cost things, it's not like this is a regular treat. Bit of a dilemma
    DFD - 26/10/19
    In the process of shedding £20k and 35lbs
    • JonW1984
    • By JonW1984 4th Jul 18, 12:06 PM
    • 18 Posts
    • 34 Thanks
    JonW1984
    Hi I've enjoyed reading your diary. I am in a similar position, reasonably well paid professional job but with about £16k of debt to get through. Looking forward to following your progress and seeing you smash it!
    • wishingthemortgaheaway
    • By wishingthemortgaheaway 4th Jul 18, 1:21 PM
    • 1,534 Posts
    • 7,469 Thanks
    wishingthemortgaheaway
    Have a look on one of the voucher sites and see if you can get something similar for oodles less money?
    The 100 payment countdown (each payment = £400) 2018 Starts at 13/100 o/s £34,750.
    Jan 18 14/100 Feb 15/100 March 18/100 April 19/100 May 20/100 June 21/100
    Term Mortgage free date: October 2029 Current mortgage free date: April 2025 March 2024 Jan 2024
    MFW 2018 Challenge Member #162 £1600ish/£2,500
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 4th Jul 18, 4:47 PM
    • 1,856 Posts
    • 10,077 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Have a look on one of the voucher sites and see if you can get something similar for oodles less money?
    Originally posted by wishingthemortgaheaway
    Great idea Or if you happen to have a birthday anywhere near, drop that into conversation and perhaps they will take a hint!
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 4th Jul 18, 5:20 PM
    • 125 Posts
    • 299 Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    Have a look on one of the voucher sites and see if you can get something similar for oodles less money?
    Originally posted by wishingthemortgaheaway
    Thanks Wish, that's a really good suggestion, I've subscribed to a daily deals site for my area and will see what pops up. I'm not holding out much hope for 90% off a spa day though, this place is mega-posh and not really a 'voucher' type of outlet, some of my friends have expensive taste! They must automatically assume I can afford it as well, I also have the highest salary in our circle.

    I live in a very expensive area, one of the island Crown Dependencies. So I pay less tax, but outgoings are considerably more expensive than the UK. We don't have an Aldi or Lidl, petrol is dear and utilities are expensive because of monopolies. Possibly this is partly the reason why I got into debt in the first place...
    DFD - 26/10/19
    In the process of shedding £20k and 35lbs
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 4th Jul 18, 5:25 PM
    • 125 Posts
    • 299 Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    Credit score
    This is weird - at the beginning of my DF journey, my credit score was 996. A few months later, it was down to 984. Now its 972 - surely as the total debt has come down, my lending relationships are longer and I'm making regular payments, it should go up or stay static?? How bizarre. I hope it doesn't take more of a battering, I would very much like to have mortgage one day.
    DFD - 26/10/19
    In the process of shedding £20k and 35lbs
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 4th Jul 18, 8:22 PM
    • 1,856 Posts
    • 10,077 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Could it be you are using fewer credit cards perhaps? Or perhaps it's tracking you when you check your score which might count against you if it's more than once in a while. Does seem odd though.

    It sounds as though the spa is going to be all or nothing, doesn't it? However, you may be in luck!
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 10th Jul 18, 1:17 PM
    • 125 Posts
    • 299 Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    Week 33
    After a relatively positive time moving forwards, I've crashed big time. I've started spending money from my current account on meals out and shopping to make me feel better about the situation, which I know is completely counterproductive and will only make things worse. I've also melted the credit card from its icy prison (I put it in the freezer in a tupperware full of water) and spent £95 - I then saw sense and chopped it up.

    What prompted this? Mr P filled in his part of the spreadsheet, the situation is much worse than I thought. His debt and mine combined is currently just over £50k. I really don't know what to do, he is completely sticking his head in the sand and seems to think things are fine. If either of us lost our jobs, we would sink in moments. The stress of all of this debt and living payday to payday is starting to make my hair fall out. I want to go to bed, pull up the duvet and never wake up

    At this rate, it will be years before we can own a home, his credit score is shot. At this rate, we will never have a child together. What is even the point? I can now see why financial troubles are such a contributor towards the divorce rate. I love him, but I'm just flabbergasted that he's let things get this far, he hasn't even faced up to it himself. The action has all been driven by me. I despair....
    DFD - 26/10/19
    In the process of shedding £20k and 35lbs
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 10th Jul 18, 2:52 PM
    • 1,856 Posts
    • 10,077 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    It can be really difficult getting someone to take their head out of the sand - possibly why he's let it get so far? Perhaps he's avoiding it because he feels it's too big for him to deal with... some people do just feel nothing can be done about it, others fight their way out of the situation they've ended up in and make good. There are lots of them on these boards.

    Your crash is your own way of dealing with the situation and as you can see, it's an emotional blow-out before you take charge and stop yourself, which you've done. More productive in the long term than pretending there's nothing wrong, so perhaps that just proves you need to be taking the lead here, whether he follows or not. It may be that once you start living by a plan, he will watch and learn. Maybe not, but for now it's one of those situations where you need to get yourself in a secure position before you can help him (like they say on flights: put on your own lifejacket before you try to help anyone else).

    For now, you both have jobs and you need to hold on to that fact. There is income coming in and you can make a plan to turn this around. If you bump your thread later in the day you'll get more responses
    from people who know more than me.
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • Working Mum
    • By Working Mum 10th Jul 18, 3:50 PM
    • 176 Posts
    • 622 Thanks
    Working Mum
    Cherry has given some good advice.

    I was married to a spendthrift who left me in hideous levels of debt when we divorced - he just put his head in the sand and spent spent spent!!

    I wish I could tell me younger self to chart my own course, detach (with love) from his spending behaviours and put the focus on the bit I can control i.e. me and get my fiscal house in order.

    You have a lot to be grateful for, you are working and can cover your payments - concentrate on that rather than future catastrophising as this is a road to nowhere.

    Stay strong and work that plan you have got going - it WILL pay off and you can share the approach with your husband when he is prepared to listen

    ((hugs))

    WM x
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 10th Jul 18, 10:46 PM
    • 1,856 Posts
    • 10,077 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Just bumping this in case anyone can offer more advice please.
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 10th Jul 18, 11:28 PM
    • 6,699 Posts
    • 14,227 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Unfortunately you cannot make a partner sort out their finances unless they want to. All you can do is protect yourself and hope he sees the light or ultimately move on. Don't treat your finances as joint. Sort out your debts and start to save for the future. Hopefully he will get on board or you will have some tough decisions to make.
    Debt free and mortgage free and early retiree. Living the dream

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages and Endowments, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 10th Jul 18, 11:31 PM
    • 6,699 Posts
    • 14,227 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Also, please don't take any notice of your credit score. It means nothing. Aim to clear the debt and hopefully by the time you need a mortgage you will be offered a decent rate. At the moment the very worst thing you could do is apply for more borrowing so there is little point looking at the score.
    Debt free and mortgage free and early retiree. Living the dream

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages and Endowments, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 10th Jul 18, 11:51 PM
    • 1,856 Posts
    • 10,077 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Thanks ES. Seems very sound advice to me.
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • JonW1984
    • By JonW1984 15th Jul 18, 8:00 AM
    • 18 Posts
    • 34 Thanks
    JonW1984
    Hi, how are you getting on? So sorry to hear of your partner's extra debts

    Try not to let it get you down, please keep posting here!
    • FiscalPickle
    • By FiscalPickle 19th Jul 18, 1:59 PM
    • 125 Posts
    • 299 Thanks
    FiscalPickle
    Week 34
    Thanks to everyone who has recently posted, it has really helped. I returned/sent back what I could splurged on during my minor spend binge, so Iím really only out of pocket for some postage fees in the end. Iím seriously considering scaling back my expectations and DF timescale, aggressively paying back the debt and putting so much focus on it is seriously affecting my state of mind. Adding the other debt that my husband has racked up to the mix has only made this worse, although I am getting better at distancing myself from it as his debt is not mine.
    If I can manage my expectations better, the debt will still get paid off, albeit slower, but I will still feel like Iíve had a (relatively) stress-free life in the intervening period.
    DFD - 26/10/19
    In the process of shedding £20k and 35lbs
    • GlendaSugarbean
    • By GlendaSugarbean 19th Jul 18, 2:10 PM
    • 61 Posts
    • 409 Thanks
    GlendaSugarbean
    You need to do what's best for your mental health. You have a plan and you're following it - sounds good to me. And please don't join your finances until your partner shows he can take responsibility for his debts!

    Could you think of a little treat or splurge you could add in when you reach a certain milestone?
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 19th Jul 18, 8:13 PM
    • 6,699 Posts
    • 14,227 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Your mental health is important so if slowing down the debt repayment means less stress than I think it is worth it. You really cannot worry about your partners debt as well as your own. Just focus on making small improvements like taking lunch into work each day or decluttering and selling stuff you don't need.
    Debt free and mortgage free and early retiree. Living the dream

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages and Endowments, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
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