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  • FIRST POST
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 4th Dec 17, 4:00 PM
    • 722Posts
    • 7,733Thanks
    117pauline
    Mindful or Mind full?
    • #1
    • 4th Dec 17, 4:00 PM
    Mindful or Mind full? 4th Dec 17 at 4:00 PM
    So....... life appears to have changed today!

    I came downstairs to a letter from my partner saying he needed time away. After 11 plus years. Not sure how I feel.

    At the moment I need to get a job. Not as easy as that sounds as I have quite a problem leaving the house at all. I am waiting to get to the top of the list for some CBT help. I also have some chronic conditions too which have hindered our relationship.

    As you can imagine, I am not sure what will happen. My plan is to do nothing rash but try to pay down my loan as much as possible. Then I am going to have to find somewhere to live etc.

    I did say I was going to start a diary so I think this is one hell of a way to get started!

    Pauline
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
Page 22
    • fay66
    • By fay66 8th Apr 18, 6:14 PM
    • 738 Posts
    • 2,078 Thanks
    fay66
    popped by hope your ok pauline, at least okish weather today ive been spring cleaning , the cooker, dusting makes everything feel a bit better
    Inland revenue £4500=
    Loan £1562
    Pay day loans -1400 1st pay 16 march £50
    Credit card 1 -4850/4850 int froze
    CC2 -978
    CC3 - 500/548 cc4 180/200
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 8th Apr 18, 8:40 PM
    • 58,912 Posts
    • 244,536 Thanks
    beanielou
    Hope you have had a good Sunday.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 8th Apr 18, 8:49 PM
    • 6,422 Posts
    • 44,815 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Hope all is ok Pauline.

    Fay that's awful about your brother. No words really.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2010 £21.63
    Debt £1880
    Weight loss 0/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £4000/£10,000
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 16th Apr 18, 11:32 PM
    • 722 Posts
    • 7,733 Thanks
    117pauline
    Good evening

    A brighter day here today. Birds and squirrels are emptying the bird feeders almost faster than I can fill them up.

    I had an ECG today which was just about normal, what ever that means. I am more settled with the meds which helps. I have only been outside twice though this week so that is something on which I need to work, easier said than done though.

    Take care everyone
    Pauline
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 17th Apr 18, 7:49 AM
    • 2,063 Posts
    • 12,826 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Hopefully the sunshine will tempt you out over the next few days. Its been a bit mixed so far but supposed to get warmer tomorrow.

    I've got a blackbird nesting which is lovely to see.
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 17th Apr 18, 9:33 AM
    • 2,198 Posts
    • 12,978 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    And I have a blackbird pulling my hanging baskets to pieces!

    Good to hear things are settling down, Pauline, and doesn't refilling bird feeders count as going outside? I think I would count that as at least 50% of going out, if it were me. (Thus two refills of the feeders = 1xgoing out).
    MFW #30 Paid off £3,942.07/£3000 as of 3/12/18
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 17th Apr 18, 10:59 AM
    • 58,912 Posts
    • 244,536 Thanks
    beanielou
    Two days out are good.
    Baby steps
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 19th Apr 18, 9:10 PM
    • 6,490 Posts
    • 47,136 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Hope you've been enjoying the sunshine over the last few days .
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 19th Apr 18, 9:29 PM
    • 58,912 Posts
    • 244,536 Thanks
    beanielou
    Also hoping you have been enjoying the sun
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 22nd Apr 18, 1:46 PM
    • 2,365 Posts
    • 14,655 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    I'm pleased to hear the good news on your ECG Pauline and that you're settled with the meds.

    The last few days have been wonderful weatherwise where I live and I hope it's the same for you. Nothing like it for brightening the spirit!

    SSG x
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 10/11/2018 - £1801.03
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 29
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 22nd Apr 18, 6:59 PM
    • 2,497 Posts
    • 15,573 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    Hope you have been outside in the sun Pauline and looking after yourself .

    Good news on the ECG .
    CC1 £3500 Nov 2018.
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 24th May 18, 7:25 PM
    • 6,490 Posts
    • 47,136 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    How are you Pauline? It's a long time since you posted. I hope everything is okay?
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 24th May 18, 8:56 PM
    • 6,422 Posts
    • 44,815 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Yes it's been a long time. Hope all is well xx
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2010 £21.63
    Debt £1880
    Weight loss 0/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £4000/£10,000
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 24th May 18, 9:29 PM
    • 58,912 Posts
    • 244,536 Thanks
    beanielou
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 24th May 18, 10:12 PM
    • 2,198 Posts
    • 12,978 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Hi from me too - missing you and your squirrels xx
    MFW #30 Paid off £3,942.07/£3000 as of 3/12/18
    • DebtFreeDuo
    • By DebtFreeDuo 25th May 18, 2:37 PM
    • 885 Posts
    • 4,471 Thanks
    DebtFreeDuo
    Just checking in, I hope you're doing well and have been enjoying the lovely weather.
    Change the way you see things and the things you see will change
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 27th May 18, 12:51 AM
    • 722 Posts
    • 7,733 Thanks
    117pauline
    Well...........

    It's been a long time and things have been truly awful however I am on the way back up thankfully.

    I have found everything so difficult, what with the agoraphobia and depressive thoughts. My doctor even got to offering inpatient care which scared the he'll out of me.

    So I got thinking and came up with a plan. Small trips two or three times a day. Making myself even if I was tearful.

    Then I decided to be really brave. So I am off to Spain in two weeks for a month. On my own! All booked now so I am doing little things to get myself organised.

    Hopefully I will find some peace.

    I stopped posting because there was only moans and groans from me.

    But now I have made a decision and I am really looking forward to my trip.

    Oh, and did I mention I am planning to back in mid July and I don't have any plans at the moment to return? That is of course if I agree with Spain.

    Thanks to everyone who has posted. I truly think it was all that kept me going.

    Have a good weekend, take care
    Pauline
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 27th May 18, 12:58 AM
    • 2,497 Posts
    • 15,573 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    Oh Pauline that is amazing , well done you for refusing to give in and carrying on. I hope Spain agrees with you , that you have a wonderful time and maybe just maybe you might end up living there, if that's possible.

    As for your moans and groans , it's your diary you can use it as you wish. Try and keep us updated on your trip if you wish.

    Virtual hugs coming your way x
    CC1 £3500 Nov 2018.
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 27th May 18, 7:18 AM
    • 6,422 Posts
    • 44,815 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    That's fantastic news Pauline I really hope you can make a fresh start in Spain.

    Would be good to keep us all updated from time to time though. We'd love to hear how you're doing.

    Bon voyage xx
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2010 £21.63
    Debt £1880
    Weight loss 0/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £4000/£10,000
    • DebtFreeDuo
    • By DebtFreeDuo 27th May 18, 10:40 AM
    • 885 Posts
    • 4,471 Thanks
    DebtFreeDuo
    I'm sorry things have been awful but what a turn around for you, I hope you have a wonderful time in Spain and I'm sure it will really help you. What a huge, brave thing for you to do! Keep us posted when you can and you can moan and groan as much as you need to here, it is your diary after all and there are lots of people here who care even if we are only on a screen.
    Change the way you see things and the things you see will change
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