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  • FIRST POST
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 4th Nov 17, 8:07 AM
    • 602Posts
    • 2,117Thanks
    loopybecs
    This Newly Single Mama Is On A Mission!!
    • #1
    • 4th Nov 17, 8:07 AM
    This Newly Single Mama Is On A Mission!! 4th Nov 17 at 8:07 AM
    I said that my last diary would be my last. But I was a different person back then...

    I had created it 12 months ago. I was a mum, with a partner of 7 years. 2 daughters who were just toddlers. A nice 3-bedroom house. And a fair bit of debt to clear.

    Fast-forward to now and I am a single mum to a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and am just about to move into a brand new apartment that I purchased. My ex bought me out of the family home. We used some of the equity to clear the credit card debt. We do however owe my parents a whopping £14.5K that I would like to clear asap!! Plus I am planning on making overpayments on my new mortgage... as I only have me to rely on now I want to be financially secure.

    Me and my ex are on good terms but it's been HARD. We split up over 9 months ago, I am in the family home while he is living with a relative until I move out. I bought a new build as I was told it would be ready to move in in June. I didn't get the keys until 18th October! And I've had to get new flooring, new furniture etc that I couldn't sort out prior to getting the keys because the builders kept moving the date out but I'm getting there and hopefully in a week's time I'll be living there and we can both get on with our lives!!

    So, the debt!! My new mortgage is £88,000. I did the Help To Buy Scheme which was £27,500. And I owe my parents £14,500 which is a joint debt with my ex.

    No other debt thankfully and I would like it to stay that way!

    In the past when trying to clear debt I have been too frugal and as such, I have made the debt worse by going crazy and shopping like mad So I am going to try and have a nice balance between clearing debt, saving, and treating myself. I need a life, otherwise what is the point? But I do not need ANOTHER pair of black high heels so its about being sensible Hopefully it works!

    I work in Accounts part-time (25 hours a week) and I also have a work from home business. Which has taken a back seat this year due to the stress but hopefully I can pick it up once I am in the flat. I do get tax credits too as I have agreed to pay for DD2s nursery fees (£780 a month!!!).

    I will try and keep up this diary as I have enjoyed writing them in the past. I am very easily distracted though so no promises!! xxx
    Last edited by loopybecs; 09-04-2018 at 9:06 AM. Reason: Trying to be more anonymous
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
Page 8
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 31st Jul 18, 7:35 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    I know I shouldn't say it but... I'M SO GLAD I AM GOING BACK TO WORK TOMORROW!!!

    DD2 has been a handful. Threenagers are hard work and she definitely kicked my butt today! Tantrums after tantrums and she is as stubborn as I am I'm absolutely shattered and will be going to bed soon!! I've just eaten 500 calories worth of Milky Way Magic Stars to ease the stress!! Some people drink to cope, some smoke, some do drugs, some gamble, and there's me eating kids chocolate I'm so hardcore. In the old days I'd be bashing the credit cards and ordering new clothes aswell, but no can do these days. Which is good, of course!

    I've just opened a HSBC regular savers account as it offers 5% interest I'll keep my Nationwide account too, so I've got 2 savings accounts. One can be for a car when mine packs up (shouldn't be any time soon, mine is only 4 years old), the other can be an emergency fund as I don't have one

    My mum was talking to me about the family loan today when I went to see her. She insisted that I don't make any payments to her for a year as she doesn't need it. Then when I refused she suggested £50 a month 304 months it would take to clear it! That's over 25 years I laughed and told her to not be daft. My ex should be paying £7,250 of it anyway as it's a joint debt but I doubt he will. He's probably forgotten about it already! He did say last year that he will pay her back in chunks rather than dribs & drabs so hopefully he's putting some money aside.

    Me & the kids went to the dentist today which is always fun (not!). I'm grateful that it's free for me though as it is expensive. The kids' teeth are fine, and my teeth are ok, however my gums are inflamed in some areas. It's been an ongoing issue and it's looking like having braces again is my only option. Part of my gum overlaps one of my incisors and so I can't clean it properly. I don't floss as the thought makes me cringe, but I need to as it's causing an issue & the last thing I want is gum disease! So I'm back in 2 weeks to see the hygienist and she will teach me the best way to clean them, as well as give me a scale & polish. I'm then seeing my dentist in November once I've done my new routine for a few months so he can see if there is any improvement. If there is he will then speak to me about having braces. An orthodontist won't see me until I nail the teeth cleaning routine apparently as it's even harder to clean them with braces on, obviously.

    Braces are expensive but I don't mind going for some ugly cheaper ones... as long as they work, I don't really care! Something else to budget for though Looking after my teeth is important to me so I don't mind if it will fix the problem. I'm sick of seeing blood every time I clean them so something has to be done.

    I've been feeling blue the last few days. I'm not 100% sure why but I'm guessing it's a mixture of my grandad's health, lack of routine whilst not at work, and the situation with my ex. It's been 18 months since we split and although I'm in a new relationship, I still get down about the separation. I hate that I miss out on 50% of the girls' lives. I never ever thought that me & him would split up. He was my absolute world. M is a brilliant boyfriend (most of the time ) and I definitely think we are much more compatible, but I still have down days. He has suggested that we go to London on Sunday for a fun day out. I said maybe - I love London but the train & the tube is £32.50 so I want to look at my spreadsheet tomorrow.

    Today is pay day but also I received some expenses I put in, and Ex's money (half of the clothes for the kids, swimming lessons etc) so the bank account is looking muchos healthy. The majority of the direct debits go out tomorrow though so that won't last long such is life!

    Oh, and £10.95 is on it's way from TCB Some of it will be going to M though, for his over-the-top expensive AF meal at the weekend
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 31st Jul 18, 7:40 PM
    • 6,255 Posts
    • 23,128 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Evening Becs,

    My DD2 was a handful at 3... tbh she's always been a handful even now at 9 .
    Who doesnt love milky stars though and the packet goes on and on haha!!!

    Yay to the healthy bank account.. even if it is only for the day xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 1st Aug 18, 1:32 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    All direct debits have gone out except my mobile contract and DD1ís swimming I have updated my spreadsheet and itís going to be a bit tight again this month, but Iíve budgeted in some fun things including a train ticket to London this weekend with M. After a stressful July dealing with Ex and him coping with the news, I feel like we need a day out together Iím not going to spend much when Iím there, just drinks & refreshments. We are going to my friendís bbq the night before too, our first social outing as a couple Iím quite excited!! Iíll be meeting another friendís new boyfriend too so thatíll be nice.

    Iíve also budgeted for fuel, food & drinks for when me & another friend go to see Britney Spears in a couple of weeks Itís her birthday next week so I need to get her a card & a present. Sheís pregnant so I might look for a maternity pillow if I can find a decent one for a good price. The ones on Argos are £39.99 which is a bit more than Iíd like to spend but Iíll shop around and look for any discounting codes.

    The rest of my money will be spent on new school uniform (Ex will give me half), childcare, food, fuel, and beauty treatments. Nails tonight which should be about £30 and then Iíll get my eyebrows tinted & waxed at some stage by my friend. No idea what colour to have on my nails, or nail art, such a first world problem

    Iíve got 6 days annual leave this month, plus the weekends and bank holiday Monday so it will be interesting to see how well I can stick to the budget!!! Bulb are sending me £50 as my account is in credit so thatís a nice added bonus to get me through at the moment, that money isnít allocated, so Iím going to try and make it stretch as much as possible.

    The mortgage now stands at £86,510.30 I have also paid another £100.00 to my parents, and will transfer £100.00 to my new savings account once itís open. Signature updated and Iím feeling positive

    Work is a mixed bag. Iím enjoying the peace but Iím feeling very sleepy so part of me would rather be at home lol. 1st day of the month is always busy but Iím pretty much up-to-date with everything so Iím going to help my colleague this afternoon as heís pretty snowed under. M did all my work while I was away so apart from going through my 117 e-mails I didnít need to catch up

    Right, lunchtime over so Iíd best get off here
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 1st Aug 18, 2:47 PM
    • 6,255 Posts
    • 23,128 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Have you looked on pinterest for your nails Becs? I always find my inspo on there ha!! xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 2nd Aug 18, 6:49 AM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Yes Iím always on Pinterest searching for inspiration about an hour before my appointment I decided to go for teal, so the nail tech did some dark shades & some light ones (think ĎTiffanyí ) and she did an ombr! on my middle fingers. My ring finger is glittery & she put loads of crystals on my middle & index fingers They do look lovely, but 2 hours and 15 minutes is way too long for me to sit in a chair whilst having my nails done! Also she lives by a lake & her house has a fair few mosquitoes visiting so I was paranoid about getting bitten! Still, they cost £30 so bang on budget and theyíre lovely

    Whilst I was there, Ex text me to confirm if I was out all day on 18th. I assumed he was planning to go to a football game, but this is the day that I drive up to Manchester to see Britney and I told him back in January that I couldnít be flexible that weekend. I rang him when I got in my car and he confirmed that he wanted to book tickets but going to the game would mean not getting home til about 8pm (probably later). My mum is having the girls for me from about lunchtime until 5pm when Ex normally has them, but I donít want to ask her to extend it til 8pm because 1) sheís doing enough childcare already as itís the summer holidays 2) it would mean eating into her Saturday night and 3) my grandadís birthday is on the 20th, and she may be out with him & her siblings for it. It might be his last one Ex felt disheartened I think and I feel guilty but at the same time, it should be him organising childcare as he needs it to cover his time with the girls. Itíll only be from 5pm until 8pm so not long really.

    Iím always encouraging him to go to football games as heís spent too long this year staying indoors because of his depression. Just typical that the one he wants to go to clashes with the concert.

    Anyway. In happier news my dad is back for the weekend today Iíve not seen him in a month so thatíll be nice! Its my last day at work today until Monday so I can spend some time with him

    I found a brand new maternity pillow on eBay for £12.99 including delivery so Iíve ordered it for my friend I just hope itís comfortable, Iím always suspicious when something is so cheap! Just need to get her a card now & then she'll be sorted

    Time to get dressed so Iíll check in later
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 2nd Aug 18, 10:23 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Well, my out of office is back on again! I managed to get all my work done, plus extra, so I can relax now until Monday Just before I left the office though, Ex text me from the hospital saying DD1 needs glasses She failed her eye test in school a while ago so they contacted our GP who referred her to the hospital to check the overall health of her eyes, as well as do an eye test. She's long-sighted in both, her right eye is weaker and she has a slight squint. I'm gutted, but she might not need glasses forever. She picked her frames, which are pink & purple apparently, and she will get them back in a week. She needs to wear them all the time I did get a bit upset at work but she was happy when I saw her so that's the main thing.

    Ex has been teaching her how to ride a bike today too so she's had a full on day! DD2 has been busy too. Still having regular accidents bless her so I'm tempted to knock the whole thing on the head for now, if she's not ready then it's pointless.

    Bulb's refund has already hit my account. I must admit, I am super impressed with their customer service! And I really like how easy their app is too. They get a thumbs up from me and if anyone is thinking of switching then I 100% recommend them! Plus they're pretty cheap

    I had a chat with Ex after work which left me confused & upset I'm not ready to go into details yet but I wish things were easier. My head is spinning and I feel bad because when M came round earlier I wasn't very chatty so we didn't have much of a conversation. Luckily he was tired so I don't think he noticed much. We've got a nice weekend planned so I'll make it up to him then

    Due to mine & Ex's long chat, I couldn't go food shopping, so I had a very MSE meal of poached eggs & beans on toast and I took advantage of the empty fridge by cleaning all the shelves I do love it when it's clean! Tomorrow I need to do some housework as I have one of my friends coming over in the evening and it's a bit dusty I'm pretty sure that I've cleaned more this summer than I did in the winter! Everything gets filthy so quickly

    Time for me to go to bed as I'm shattered night readers x
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • Rachel24
    • By Rachel24 3rd Aug 18, 7:21 AM
    • 187 Posts
    • 676 Thanks
    Rachel24
    Hope you're okay Becs. You seem to have a lot going on just now. Must be hard too knowing your ex still wants to be with you. Hope you have a lovely weekend :-)
    • monz
    • By monz 3rd Aug 18, 9:29 AM
    • 3,295 Posts
    • 10,814 Thanks
    monz
    Just remember to do whats right for you and what makes you happy. Remember you split for a reason <3 xxx
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house pot for bobs after fees : 60
    car PCP - 788.96/11848.25 mum and dad £800/£4,000 mortgage - £83,695 o/s currently - paid £468.54 (£4.10 overpayment)
    boys bday 115/300 (£35 pending surveys) Christmas - 0/500
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 3rd Aug 18, 2:48 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Thank you both I think my problem is Ex is such a good friend, and heís very funny, and attractive, and caring, and a fantastic dad. So all those things make me think ĎWhat are you doing Becs?! Get back with him at once!í but the negatives outweigh it all for me. For months & months (and years, on & off) I was really unhappy, and deep down I wanted him to be someone he wasnít. He would never ever suggest going out, or be affectionate, or want to be intimate... each of those things would be initiated by me & quite often Iíd get rejected. We were housemates, and parents, nothing else and I needed more than that. That kind of relationship works for some people and thatís absolutely fine but it made me miserable. I tried so hard to make it work and we even had counselling but nothing changed and I had to make a decision. Stay with him & be miserable or leave in hope of finding someone much more compatible. And also give him the chance to find someone who loves him for who he is, because why should he have to change for me? Heís someone who is lazy & very low maintenance and there are thousands of women out there who would be happy with someone like that.

    I remember writing a letter to him, and in it I said I was jealous of the football team he supports because of all the effort he made to get to the games, and he didnít make any effort with me. I felt neglected and rejected a lot and I felt that we had no relationship any more. At 29 I was too young to accept that this was it for the rest of my life. He isn't a bad person, and he has many qualities, but in terms of compatibility we are nowhere near on the same level. I feel he would be much happier with someone else. But itís still hard. He told me he can relate to the Elvis song ďyou were always on my mindĒ a lot I canít listen to it now without crying.

    M and I are still in the ďhoneymoon periodĒ and Iím very aware that it could all change which is why Iím not looking too much into the future with him. So far though Iíd say weíve got a better chance because we want the same things out of a relationship. Heís very romantic & he listens when Iím upset, and we like doing the same things such as fun days out & our holiday choices are the same. And heís 6í4 which is fab as Iím 5í11 so I can wear heels next to him lol. Weíll see how it goes. Ex said he would be happier now if everyone knew so he didnít have to bottle it up at work. Iím quite happy with people not knowing though as I like my love life to be private (she says as sheís spills everything on a public forum ) but if it easier for him then thatís the next stage.

    Any readers going through a break up, I feel for you. Itís truly an awful thing to go through but we will all come out the other side smiling!!!

    Iíve just got home from food shopping and spent £43.31 which is much more than usual, however I needed to buy things that I donít buy every week like margarine, a birthday card & drink for the bbq Iím going to. It was a day for ignorant shoppers who like to dump their trolley in a really inconvenient spot, or walk slowly in the middle of the aisle so you canít overtake I was hot (its 30 degrees here today) and tired and I made it clear a few times that they weren't the only people in the supermarket!

    I also spent £20 today at my parentsí house, as my mumís friend came over and did a car service for me Bargain! Heís a retired mechanic but still enjoys doing a few jobs here & there for pennies. Mum gave us lunch bless her & it was nice catching up with my dad who seems to be enjoying Latvia and the job. He showed me some pictures and it does look quite nice there so I may have to take a trip! Not in the winter though as it gets to -25 degrees I also had a decent conversation with my brother for the first time in ages. We had a falling out a few months ago but weíre a bit better now. He thinks that him & his girlfriend will break up this weekend & heís too injured to do certain workouts at the gym (heís a PT) so heís not in a good mood. He needs a holiday really but he wonít go anywhere because of his strict routine with his food & the gym!

    4 weeks until pay day and Iím still plodding along trying to be careful. I got an invoice today from the block management company charging me 81p for last year(?!) so Iíve sent them a snotty e-mail about it. The postage probably cost them just as much! When I move house, whenever that will be, I will not miss them!

    My friend cancelled this eveningís plans...we are seeing each other next week instead so Iím abandoning the cleaning as itís too hot & no-one will judge me Apart from cooking and bathing/showering the girls later Iím not going to do a thing!
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 3rd Aug 18, 6:01 PM
    • 6,255 Posts
    • 23,128 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Nails sounds lovely Becs, but over 2 hours!!! I used to go to a woman who used to take forever as she would be up and down putting a load of washing in, dealing with the kids etc! My new lady is so fast but so good at them.

    Oh dear to the ex. You know better than anyone why you finished it and I think you need to keep that in mind. As awful as it sounds it did have several chances.

    Enjoy your weekend xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 4th Aug 18, 7:39 AM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Just popping on to say that Iíve just made my first ever mortgage overpayment!!!! A grand total of £5.00 I just wanted to check that it worked first so I thought Iíd start with something small.

    After reading some diaries on here I think making small payments to my savings accounts and the mortgage will keep me motivated. I canít really do that to my parental loan though, it would look strange if my mum could see 10 x £3.47 transactions
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • Chrystal
    • By Chrystal 4th Aug 18, 10:39 AM
    • 372 Posts
    • 2,410 Thanks
    Chrystal
    Just popping on to say that Iíve just made my first ever mortgage overpayment!!!! A grand total of £5.00 I just wanted to check that it worked first so I thought Iíd start with something small.

    After reading some diaries on here I think making small payments to my savings accounts and the mortgage will keep me motivated. I canít really do that to my parental loan though, it would look strange if my mum could see 10 x £3.47 transactions
    Originally posted by loopybecs
    BUT you can open a separate account at your bank, called Parents, which you can send your small payments to. Surprising how they soon add up.
    I Believe.....
    That it isn't always enough, to be forgiven by others.
    Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 4th Aug 18, 3:01 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Not long after my last update, my mum called to say my Grandad got rushed into hospital last night as he fell and couldn't stop bleeding due to being on blood thinning medication (because of the mini strokes). He's been admitted to one of the wards and they're doing a load of tests & scans on him because his stomach represents one of a pregnant woman. They don't know what's causing it yet but I'm thinking the worst and expecting them to say it's a tumour. He can't walk and he's very confused bless him. With all of his health issues I'm not hopeful My mum & my auntie are at the hospital now so hopefully I'll get an update soon. It's such a worry. Apparently his living room walls are smothered in blood

    To cheer myself up I've transferred £2.47 from my TCB account to my bank account, and then I transferred £50 into my car fund. I plan to run my current car into the ground, so going by my last one I've got another 7 years before I need to buy another one, and it'll be nice to pay for it in cash! My girls will be 10 and 12 then so I might need something bigger than a 3-door Corsa

    DD1 is off to a birthday party soon. I've re-gifted one of her presents... is that bad?! It's something that wouldn't really interest either of my girls and it's saved me some money While she's at the party I'm going to take DD2 to McDs for a rare treat. Saves me cooking aswell, I hate cooking in this heat!
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • Honeysucklelou2
    • By Honeysucklelou2 4th Aug 18, 3:59 PM
    • 984 Posts
    • 4,162 Thanks
    Honeysucklelou2
    Sorry to hear about your grandfather. Hope you get better news after the tests have been done.
    paydbx #93 £784.50/£8,000.
    Loan £17k - paid off in Aug 2017. Home improvement loans £3342 March 2017. £3123 in Jan 18
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 5th Aug 18, 7:30 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Thank you. The plastic surgeon is going to see him next week (his arm is ripped to shreds from the fall ), as well as the physiotherapist and occupational health. He's not a happy bunny & wants to go home but he's too poorly... I don't think he realises just how poorly he is! I'm not sure what's going to be done about his other problems yet but I'm seeing my mum tomorrow, so I'll ask her then.

    I've had an up & down 24 hours. Down because of worrying about my grandad, and feeling confused about my ex. Up because the BBQ last night with my friends and M was lovely, and London today was fun We ate at Bella Italia in Leicester Square and we got a 40% off voucher code, so it came in at £19.87 for 2 mains & drinks! No other spends apart from more drinks (it was a very hot day) and the train fare, which we will get some compensation on as it was an hour delayed on the way home due to an object caught on the overhead electric wires

    Can't wait to update my spreadsheet tomorrow
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 5th Aug 18, 7:36 PM
    • 6,255 Posts
    • 23,128 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Hope your grandad is ok Becs.

    Glad youve had a brilliant day out today xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • monz
    • By monz 6th Aug 18, 9:05 AM
    • 3,295 Posts
    • 10,814 Thanks
    monz
    Sorry to hear your granda, hope he has a fast recovery!

    Noone should also know about your love life unless its on your terms also <3xx

    High five on overpayment, higher than my 4.10 lol I am rounding mine out to be even xx
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house pot for bobs after fees : 60
    car PCP - 788.96/11848.25 mum and dad £800/£4,000 mortgage - £83,695 o/s currently - paid £468.54 (£4.10 overpayment)
    boys bday 115/300 (£35 pending surveys) Christmas - 0/500
    • loopybecs
    • By loopybecs 6th Aug 18, 12:38 PM
    • 602 Posts
    • 2,117 Thanks
    loopybecs
    Thank you. Iím like a tap today Iím sat at my desk and canít seem to stop the tears from flowing. Itís a head vs heart situation & I feel like Iím being so unfair on M & Ex, even though neither of them know how Iím feeling. M called in sick this morning, and heís off from tomorrow until Thursday, and then Iím off on Friday so we arenít working together at all this week which is a good thing for me. Some time apart will help I think. Iím meant to be seeing him one evening when I donít have the girls but I might cancel - I know I am coming across as being mean, but I feel like I need time to think properly. Maybe I need to be on my own for a few months.

    My grandad is getting tested for dementia today. He think there is a chance heís going home, which is absolutely not happening as itís too dangerous. His house is not equipped for his condition and he trips over a lot so heís going to be staying there until at least thatís all sorted. Iím going to try & see him at some point when I donít have the girls. He looks so frail now

    Sorry for the doom & gloom post! Iíll try and be more upbeat when I next update
    Mortgage: £88,000.00 £86,500.00
    Loan From Parents: £15,300.00 £15,100.00
    Emergency Fund: £100.00/£5,000.00

    New Car Fund: £50.00/£6,000.00
    Single mama to 2 little girlies
    • Chrystal
    • By Chrystal 6th Aug 18, 11:04 PM
    • 372 Posts
    • 2,410 Thanks
    Chrystal
    I'm sorry to hear about your Grandad, and hope he can settle a bit until there is something sorted... not an easy situation for any of you.

    With regards to the feeling on needing to be on your own for a few months I think it;s probably a good idea. You're still in a turmoil over OH and really need to 'find' yourself and what YOU want from life. This is much easier to do when no one is pulling on your emotions, and you may surprise yourself with the conclusions you eventually reach. Take some time out to get to know yourself as a singleton. ((hugs))
    I Believe.....
    That it isn't always enough, to be forgiven by others.
    Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.
    • monz
    • By monz 7th Aug 18, 8:31 AM
    • 3,295 Posts
    • 10,814 Thanks
    monz
    Hun do whats best for you in all this, not anyone else. It sounds like you are putting everyone else first and you need a break from it all. If you ever need to talk can mail me on this or that xxx
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house pot for bobs after fees : 60
    car PCP - 788.96/11848.25 mum and dad £800/£4,000 mortgage - £83,695 o/s currently - paid £468.54 (£4.10 overpayment)
    boys bday 115/300 (£35 pending surveys) Christmas - 0/500
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