Paying off debt to freedom

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  • camz2017
    camz2017 Posts: 347 Forumite
    Ok so I’m in a nasty mood, what’s new lol, so I deleted the ex on all social media and even email.

    As I’ve been getting a whole bunch of nuisance calls I called EE and got my number changed, after leaving all WhatsApp groups containing the ex so she couldn’t see my new one.

    I then took two huge bin liners over to her house containing her things, and I threw in a couple of pics ripped in half, of things I know she would really care about lol. I also put in a note if she tries to come visit me at home I will call the police. I left that outside her door.

    ...Can’t wait for her to try and call me :rotfl:

    Ahhhhhh I finally feel good. Not sure I could have been any clearer :D
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
  • natsplatnat
    natsplatnat Posts: 3,033
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    I would hope she gets the message loud n clear from that!


    Have you worked out your upcoming budget taking the car costs into consideration?


    And hey! It's a Tropicana - don't beat yourself up!
    start = Wed 19th Nov 2008 £21,225
    end = Mon 28th Sept 2015 DEBT FREE!
    I love a good plan - it may not work.... but I love a good plan!
  • camz2017
    camz2017 Posts: 347 Forumite
    Instant Karma literally - picked the car up and it broke down 1 mile down the road lol. I do my budget on the last day of every month in YNAB, so it'll go in there. I might break down the repayment over 2 months, but will set a category for "unexpected expenses" and bundle it there. Then in future I will keep budgeting to that category so it can act as my buffer for these things. After a few months it will show me average spend in the category, and they wont be so unexpected anymore.
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
  • camz2017
    camz2017 Posts: 347 Forumite
    On another note I can't go the gym without my car and I'm so sad. I had my whole workout planned :(
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
  • I'd hope she'll definitely get the message now. I'm not sure how you could be any clearer lol.

    Bloody cars are always the thing to break the budgeting, but we can't do without them.

    I totally understand how you feel about missing a workout. I've had to cancel my gym membership for other reasons than money and feel crap that I no longer workout even though it is for the best.
    I hope you find another way of filling your evening
    DEBT FREE WANNABE
    [STRIKE]H+M £72.89[/STRIKE] NEXT £319.56 22.9%APR BARCLAY CARD £352.90 26.43%APR ARGOS CARD£38.26/ £698.02 29.9%APR VERY £221.19/ £1825.21 47.9%APR :eek:
  • camz2017
    camz2017 Posts: 347 Forumite
    edited 16 November 2017 at 11:12PM
    She posted me a letter, I feel both quite amused, but also rather mean. It's like I genuinely tried being nice and she just wouldn't stop bothering me... I have over 30 voicemails in 2 weeks alone. It's just not ok, and I'm usually a person to hold my head up high and not engage in games, but she needed me to be this harsh to stop her. All the letter says is she's sorry, I'm the first person to ever genuinely break her heart and she never felt good enough for me. She does go on for a while about how much I've hurt her and she cannot believe I kept read receipt on, read certain messages and didn't reply. The reality is she's had a lot of guys screw her around, she's never had serious relationships and I think I probably am the first guy to genuinely break her heart. It's super sad she didn't feel good enough for me, and she is genuinely stunning, but her friend would tell her she was punching (insecure jel girly best mate), which is a joke as I don't feel anything special. Anyway, major issue, she didn't like food to the extent I do, I always felt like a fat pig eating down half the restaurant as she had half a salad... Majorly upset me lol. I've usually dated girls who go gym a lot, and therefore eat like me.

    Anyway, evening not all bad, I have totally revamped my YNAB, I now have a category called "avoiding future debt."

    I have budgeted for expenses that are not monthly, but often end up hitting my budget and causing debt:
    These things are:
    Laptop Replacement - I usually get a new laptop every 5 years, I spend £1000 on it, but it lasts. So that's £16.50 a month ie £1000 in 5 years. In reality, I know it's not cheap, but I've done the cheap DELLS with 5 repairs and plastic bits falling off in 2 years. False economy.

    TV Replacement - I've had mine 1.5 years, likely need a replacement in 3 years - £12.50 a month ie £450 in 3 years time.

    Car Repairs - I've been spending around £600 a year on car repairs - so £50 a month

    Gifting - £10 a month, as a family I've let parents know I'm struggling so we agreed to not exchange presents e.g. I wont be giving sister stuff and vice-versa. So just for friends really and maybe something really small on secret santa with family.

    Car Insurance - I pay annual - so budgeted for it rather than doing my usual and sticking it on the credit card.

    Some may say "you are in debt, why are you saving for a laptop." or "why put money aside for car repairs when in debt." I am doing it so I never have to touch the plastic again, so next time the car breaks down I have the money upfront, sat in my debit card. Most importantly, I'm doing it for me because I need to stay in control. I would rather have this, where I have a clear plan of where everything is coming from, so I can learn new behaviours - than pay extra on the debt. I want to set myself up with the correct life skills to stop this happening all over.

    I also finally got around to doing this, basically I opened a new bank account with Santander. Why? Well my Natwest has been overdrawn for 12+ months and I have never been able to track the balance down, as I have so many ingoings and outgoings, its just been messy.

    I moved every direct debit to the new Santander, and moved over all remaining money in my budget to Santander. This has given me the exact number for the Debt in Natwest. Nothing will enter or exit the natwest now apart from debt repayment, so I am now tracking it as an off budget account in YNAB as a liability until pay-down. Once paid down - I will close it. It does mean my debt is actually slightly higher than reported, as I am really around 1.5k overdrawn, obviously when I reported it as lower it was because it had my salary etc in there which was needed for rent, bills, living etc, but at least I can view the debt now. Head out of the sand!
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
  • natsplatnat
    natsplatnat Posts: 3,033
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    Morning camz,
    Hopefully your "cruel to be kind" drama is finished now. Heartbreak is awful but she will recover.
    Your plan with your new account is a good one. I did something similar when I cleared an old OD (back in 2014). I essentially run my finances via my spreadsheet (it was a necessity when I was paid weekly), and when I opened a new account and moved my DD's etc over, I could see from my spreadsheet that there were blocks of days (sometimes a whole week or more) where there was a bit of money in my new account that wasn't needed immediately. So, I used to move this money into my old OD for a few days / a week to reduce the balance temporarily and therefore reduce the amount of interest I was being charged each month. I pre-dated a payment to move the money back into my active account for when it was needed. To be fair you do have to keep your eye on the ball to do this (but I am a spreadsheet nerd and loved it) - it was great to see that each month I paid less in interest... my spreadsheet says I saved £32 in the first year, meaning more of my money was working for me. I also made a regular payment of £50 a month into that account which stayed there and I added in any extra money I earned (house-sitting, cashback, online bingo wins etc). I have a graph that shows my progress really clearly but I can't get it to fit within these message parameters.
    Well, I hope that is a bit clearer than mud (I do have a tendancy to waffle!)
    start = Wed 19th Nov 2008 £21,225
    end = Mon 28th Sept 2015 DEBT FREE!
    I love a good plan - it may not work.... but I love a good plan!
  • I think they way you are forward planning and budgeting for laptop and tv is a very sensible thing to do. As like you say it would likely go on credit card otherwise. I too am planning to have a stash for such occurrences and with 4 kids that happens more than I care to admit. Although the money the children receive from their dad does help with that immensely.

    Hope today is a good day
    DEBT FREE WANNABE
    [STRIKE]H+M £72.89[/STRIKE] NEXT £319.56 22.9%APR BARCLAY CARD £352.90 26.43%APR ARGOS CARD£38.26/ £698.02 29.9%APR VERY £221.19/ £1825.21 47.9%APR :eek:
  • camz2017
    camz2017 Posts: 347 Forumite
    Thanks a lot. Still don’t have my car, they messed that up again. Lol

    Tomorrow is the lucky day apparently, so excited to get back in the car oh my god I can’t even explain. I’ve basically ran out of food as I won’t spend money at the small shops.
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
  • CAR IS BACK! Garage was AWFUL, but I am so so so so so glad to have my car. Outside the gym I am soooo lazy, without my car I literally did not leave the house and I just sat in my bed hoping the car would be done soon. I would drive two doors down if I could lol :)
    BC 0/15305.83 MBNA: 0/11231.16 TESCO 0/822.87 LOAN 0/4272.67
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