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    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 24th Sep 17, 1:22 PM
    • 5,747Posts
    • 40,597Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    • #1
    • 24th Sep 17, 1:22 PM
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally 24th Sep 17 at 1:22 PM
    My DH and I have been in debt for 34 Years, apart from brief periods, ever since I was offered my first credit card at the tender age of19.

    Our debts were caused by us being impulsive spenders and not being very skilled at budgeting or managing our money, so we know it is our own fault. We always believed that one day we would have more money, mysteriously, and that this would bail us out .

    Our full light bulb moment came when we realised, "What if we never have any more money than we do right now?"

    A couple of years ago we were coping with the minimum payments, but didn't have enough to overpay on any of them. We were forking out £1300 a month in minimum payments, and the interest alone was £1000 a month .

    But then in 2015 our small business started to bring in less, and a family bereavement, and illness affected our ability to work. We could no longer afford the minimum repayments and we were scared we would lose our home. We were stricken with stress and depression .

    Step Change shone a light in the darkness for us and they arranged for us to make token payments of £1 a month to our creditors. This saved our sanity and we were reassured that our home was unlikely to be taken from us.

    My DH recently turned 55 and drew out his pension so that we could make full and final offers to our creditors. All but one accepted an offer of 50% of what we owed (which is all we had to offer). We are continuing negotiations with the final creditor and hope to be debt free by Christmas .

    Being so close to being debt free has made me realise what a heavy burden the debts have been all these years, like living our lives wearing lead boots.

    Once we are debt free we will still need to live very frugally because we have no emergency fund or savings, and our income can be irregular. I hope that starting a diary will help to focus me on frugal living, avoid impulsive spends, and keep my spirits up. Because frugal living can be a lonely and isolating experience.

    This site and Step Change has helped me so much, and I hope that my diary will help to inspire others that it's never too late to change your life .
    Last edited by HairyHandofDartmoor; 18-11-2017 at 9:49 AM.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
Page 194
    • please-let-me-be-lucky
    • By please-let-me-be-lucky 15th Sep 18, 5:32 PM
    • 9,148 Posts
    • 55,088 Thanks
    please-let-me-be-lucky
    Hope you’ve had a lovely saunter Xx
    Debts @ LBM £23,729.31. Debts @ 08/04/2016 £0

    NSDs achieved in 2018 38/60
    Best win so far - holiday to Florida
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 15th Sep 18, 5:55 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Enjoy your ramble, HH. I hope you find some bargains especially books

    I expect DS3 will downgrade his tea choices when he's at Uni and having to pay for his own. Amazing what a bit of belt-tightening does to our preferences
    Originally posted by carbootcrazy
    They didn't have any lapsang so he'll have to make do with Earl Grey!

    Enjoy your Saturday ramble HHOD.

    Re the close airer I noticed Mr Al's had some in for £12.99 (I think) yesterday but unsure of the size etc. Plus I'm not sure if you have Al's nearby but just incase.

    Lovely baby news, I'm sure Mum is looking down xx
    Originally posted by mummytogirls
    Thanks MTG. I'll have a look in Mr Al if I get a chance.

    Hope you’ve had a lovely saunter Xx
    Originally posted by please-let-me-be-lucky
    Thank you Lucky.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 15th Sep 18, 6:06 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    My Saturday saunter went well. I couldn't find a book I wanted but I enjoy looking. I got my latte free with my Costalot loyalty points. I also got bananas, 2 x satsumas, 2 x grapes (still £1 a punnet), squeezable honey for DH, bread, cheese, 3 x milk, and a greetings card to build up my collection; which all came to £13.76. DH told me to buy myself something to cheer myself up, so I got a tee shirt for £22.

    It was very busy in town, maybe it's payday or people buying autumn clothes. There's lots of Christmas stuff appearing in the shops . It was hard to walk in a straight line for dodging people.

    Since I got back I've cleaned out the furry moron, emptied the bins, folded up some clean washing, hung out the wash I did before I went out, and put another wash on. I've also emptied the dishwasher. Now I'm trying to relax.

    I've done 10,064 steps, 21 floors and 12 active minutes so far today.
    Last edited by HairyHandofDartmoor; 15-09-2018 at 6:10 PM.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Nicnak
    • By Nicnak 15th Sep 18, 7:12 PM
    • 1,329 Posts
    • 7,169 Thanks
    Nicnak
    That's a lot of floors! Mine doesn't track floors, just steps and heart rate and a few other bits x
    September 6th 2017 - Updated 21st Oct
    Credit Card £0 now: £0 Tesco Loan £7500 = £0 Consolidation £15,000 = £10,812 Total = £25,330 £10,812 59% gone EMF #252 = £1300/£1000
    Sealed pot challenge #589
    Pay off all your debts by Christmas #71
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 15th Sep 18, 8:17 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I always do a lot of floors Nicnak. We have two flights of stairs in our house and Devon has a lot of hills!
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 7:53 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    This morning I pottered about emptying bins, folding up washing, doing laundry etc. Then after lunch we went out to a NT place.

    DS1 has got a cough and the other two never want to come out with us, so it was just DH and me, which was quite nice for a change. It was very crowded with families as they had an event on, but it was good to get out of the house. DH likes looking around the NT houses and I like the houses and the gardens, so we did both and then had a coffee. So a LSD as free entry and parking.

    Last time I went there was with my mum, so it felt a bit sad, but I don't want to stop going there as it's a nice place. The forcast said drizzle, but it stayed dry luckily, although it was a bit overcast and misty.

    When we got back I cleared up the mess in the kitchen and then cooked dinner. My stepdad has been visiting relatives this weekend so he didn't come today.
    Last edited by HairyHandofDartmoor; 16-09-2018 at 8:17 PM.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 16th Sep 18, 8:39 PM
    • 6,322 Posts
    • 43,648 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Glad to read you're back to your Saturday saunters and keeping busy. It's early days you're going to get times when sad memories appear, one day it will be easier but not yet xx
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £404.08
    Debt £2180
    Weight loss 0/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £4000/£10,000
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 8:40 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Thanks SA.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 16th Sep 18, 8:42 PM
    • 2,010 Posts
    • 12,477 Thanks
    redofromstart
    I rarely hit the 20 floors thing, unless its one of those annoying days were you trot up and down the stairs twenty times, having a complete CRAFT moment each time and then having to go up again when you do remember

    (CRAFT - Can't remember a flipping thing)
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 8:44 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I have a lot of CRAFT moments Redo . I ALWAYS reach my stairs target but not always the others.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 8:50 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Tomorrow I'm going shopping with DS3 to get some clothes he needs for uni, then DH is meeting us and we'll drive to a large Mr T to get him some plates, etc.

    He's going next weekend and I still don't know things like his postal address and exactly what comes with the accommodation. For example will he need an oven glove? DS3 says he hasn't had any more emails from from the uni, but this information must be available surely? Stress .
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 16th Sep 18, 9:08 PM
    • 2,256 Posts
    • 13,962 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    Hi Hairy. Just caught up with your diary. As SA commented a few posts back you are beginning to sound like your old self and I'm so pleased.

    Re uni - perhaps give them a call and see if they can email you the info?
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 07/11/2018 - £1771.05
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 30
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 9:20 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Thanks SSG. I want to find out because it's making me feel a bit anxious. I don't have my mum to talk these things over with any more and I'm worried I'll forget something important.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 16th Sep 18, 9:28 PM
    • 2,256 Posts
    • 13,962 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    I'm sure the uni will be helpfuL. The things you are worrying about will be way down at the bottom of DS's list so it's just as well he's got you to think of these things for him. Young men eh! My boss 's son goes off to uni next week too. Boss is already moaning about how much his wife is doing/ sorting out things for said son!
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 07/11/2018 - £1771.05
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 30
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 9:46 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Hi Hairy. Just caught up with your diary. As SA commented a few posts back you are beginning to sound like your old self and I'm so pleased.
    Originally posted by Seasidegal58
    Thanks SSG. I don't feel like myself. When I think about my mum not being here any more I feel distraught and like I'm going to have a panic attack. But I guess I'm getting a bit better at pushing it to the back of my mind.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 16th Sep 18, 9:49 PM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I'm sure the uni will be helpfuL. The things you are worrying about will be way down at the bottom of DS's list so it's just as well he's got you to think of these things for him. Young men eh! My boss 's son goes off to uni next week too. Boss is already moaning about how much his wife is doing/ sorting out things for said son!
    Originally posted by Seasidegal58
    This is what worries me, I don't feel like I'm doing very much but I don't know what I've forgotten. My mind feels so sluggish at the moment. What haven't I thought of? What haven't I done that I should have done?

    Like contents insurance! I've just thought of that and we need to organise a policy for him.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Eager_Elephant
    • By Eager_Elephant 17th Sep 18, 6:37 AM
    • 4,489 Posts
    • 26,131 Thanks
    Eager_Elephant
    He's going next weekend and I still don't know things like his postal address and exactly what comes with the accommodation. For example will he need an oven glove? DS3 says he hasn't had any more emails from from the uni, but this information must be available surely? Stress .
    Originally posted by HairyHandofDartmoor
    I know its hard but please stop worrying, DS has definitely had emails about what his accommodation has and what he needs to bring - my son is so laid back as well so I brought him what I thought he needed and then if he needed anything else there are always supermarkets.

    Oven gloves will not be provided and in my sons 2 years so far I have never seen one in a communal kitchen, they all use tea towels.

    He will only know the address of his accomodation when he collects his keys, post will be sent to the Uni Student Support Office and students get a text or email to say they have something to collect, you wont be able to send post direct to his accomodation if he is in Halls.

    Any other questions give me a shout - my son has survived 2 Uni years so far which always amazes me as he really lacks common sense
    Ninja Saving Turtle No. 1 for August
    NSD - 9/15
    (up to 12/8/18)
    My Diary is here - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2175629 (Eager Elephants Effective Everyday Excursion)
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 17th Sep 18, 8:11 AM
    • 2,010 Posts
    • 12,477 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Don't fret, borrowing stuff off people is a great way to start a conversation. Educate him on Wilkos for if he needs cheap bits for the kitchen. If he is in a big communal kitchen then he won't have much space, and he certainly doesn't want expensive bits or a huge volume of stuff that will go walkabouts. My locker was tiny. One each of medium pan, plate, bowl, cup, one set of cutlery, an ok chopping knife and a tea towel would do. You just learn to improvise, or to borrow things, and that if you don't wash up, you can't eat.
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 17th Sep 18, 8:15 AM
    • 5,344 Posts
    • 31,648 Thanks
    in need of direction
    Have you never seen the ad for chocolate digestives? Arm him with these and he can trade for loans. Also, the one thing my DS was always in need of, to the extent that we still give them as a stocking stuffer, is tea towels.
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £72,374.15, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £377.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £1,100/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 17th Sep 18, 9:41 AM
    • 5,747 Posts
    • 40,597 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    @EagerElephant @Redo @INOD Thank you I don't know why I'm panicking like this, I don't usually. I'm normally efficient and on top of things.

    We did all this for DS1 seven years ago, but I seem to have forgotten what we did. Although so much has happened since then, like losing my sister and my mum, that it seems a lifetime ago that DS1 went. Plus DS1 dropped out after six months due to depression.

    You are making me feel less panicky so thank you. I googled to do list for university and there are some useful lists online too for numpties like me .

    DH's meeting has been cancelled so he is going to come with us, not sure if DS3 will think that is good news or bad news. It's raining steadily today so DS3 will appreciate the need for a raincoat!

    Today we're going to buy him:

    -waterproof raincoat
    -waterproof trainers
    -weekend rucksack (ideally waterproof)

    Then we're going to the supermarket to buy him:

    -dinner plates
    -side plates
    -bowls
    -cheap mug set
    -teatowels

    I've set aside two bath towels and two hand towels from our collection. I need to check DS1's box of uni stuff to see if a chopping board is in there.

    At the end of today I will hopefully feel more on top of things!
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    EMERGENCY FUND = £17
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
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