Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 24th Sep 17, 1:22 PM
    • 3,868Posts
    • 25,638Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    • #1
    • 24th Sep 17, 1:22 PM
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally 24th Sep 17 at 1:22 PM
    My DH and I have been in debt for 34 Years, apart from brief periods, ever since I was offered my first credit card at the tender age of19.

    Our debts were caused by us being impulsive spenders and not being very skilled at budgeting or managing our money, so we know it is our own fault. We always believed that one day we would have more money, mysteriously, and that this would bail us out .

    Our full light bulb moment came when we realised, "What if we never have any more money than we do right now?"

    A couple of years ago we were coping with the minimum payments, but didn't have enough to overpay on any of them. We were forking out £1300 a month in minimum payments, and the interest alone was £1000 a month .

    But then in 2015 our small business started to bring in less, and a family bereavement, and illness affected our ability to work. We could no longer afford the minimum repayments and we were scared we would lose our home. We were stricken with stress and depression .

    Step Change shone a light in the darkness for us and they arranged for us to make token payments of £1 a month to our creditors. This saved our sanity and we were reassured that our home was unlikely to be taken from us.

    My DH recently turned 55 and drew out his pension so that we could make full and final offers to our creditors. All but one accepted an offer of 50% of what we owed (which is all we had to offer). We are continuing negotiations with the final creditor and hope to be debt free by Christmas .

    Being so close to being debt free has made me realise what a heavy burden the debts have been all these years, like living our lives wearing lead boots.

    Once we are debt free we will still need to live very frugally because we have no emergency fund or savings, and our income can be irregular. I hope that starting a diary will help to focus me on frugal living, avoid impulsive spends, and keep my spirits up. Because frugal living can be a lonely and isolating experience.

    This site and Step Change has helped me so much, and I hope that my diary will help to inspire others that it's never too late to change your life .
    Last edited by HairyHandofDartmoor; 18-11-2017 at 9:49 AM.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
Page 103
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 5th Feb 18, 8:52 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    You've definitely got me thinking beanie.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 5th Feb 18, 8:55 PM
    • 52,619 Posts
    • 206,466 Thanks
    beanielou
    You've definitely got me thinking beanie.
    Originally posted by HairyHandofDartmoor
    Glad to be of service
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • WannabeFree
    • By WannabeFree 5th Feb 18, 9:00 PM
    • 1,385 Posts
    • 11,612 Thanks
    WannabeFree
    We have a whiteboard for youngest, along with alarms on my phone. She has several things and some are at set times, some are X amount of time apart etc. It would be far too much to remember.

    We use a white board and have the days and times and drugs etc needed then tick them of when given and sign who by etc. I also write it in a book but obviously DH wouldn't need to do that.

    Just like in hospital really
    “Once you hit rock bottom, that's where you perfectly stand; That's your chance of restarting, but restarting the right way.”
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 5th Feb 18, 9:05 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Yes that's just what I was thinking Wannabe. That may just work for DH. He has to take tablets first thing in the morning, with two of his meals, and last thing at night so it's quite a lot to remember.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 5th Feb 18, 9:42 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    We have a whiteboard for youngest, along with alarms on my phone. She has several things and some are at set times, some are X amount of time apart etc. It would be far too much to remember.

    We use a white board and have the days and times and drugs etc needed then tick them of when given and sign who by etc. I also write it in a book but obviously DH wouldn't need to do that.

    Just like in hospital really
    Originally posted by WannabeFree
    It must be hard work for you coping with all of that every day Wannabe. You're amazing .
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 5th Feb 18, 9:44 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I'm in bed now, so my final step count for the day is:

    14,264 steps, 35 floors, 13 active minutes, 2,172 calories and 6.07 miles.

    And still I'm not losing weight .
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 9:58 AM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    It's DS2's last day at home today before he goes to America .

    He's flying from Exeter airport this time so we're driving him there tomorrow morning. That will save DS2 two days of travelling, plus we get to spend some time with him . Unfortunately he has an early flight and needs to check in ahead of time, so it means an early start for us in the morning . We want to take our time so DH doen't get stressed.

    Today is our last chance to finalise the written travel instructions for him and make sure he has everything he needs.

    I'm also doing my weekly shop today, a day early, so will aim to stick to budget. We should get through less food anyway as DS2 will be away for three weeks.

    We've had a letter from NPower saying we owe them £6 and I've no idea why because we've been paying them the agreed extortionate weekly amount .

    I hope everyone has a good Tuesday .
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 6th Feb 18, 11:02 AM
    • 52,619 Posts
    • 206,466 Thanks
    beanielou
    Well at least it is only 6 quid.

    Hope all goes to plan.
    We have a dusting of snow today.
    Hope it all goes away pronto.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • please-let-me-be-lucky
    • By please-let-me-be-lucky 6th Feb 18, 11:21 AM
    • 8,756 Posts
    • 51,017 Thanks
    please-let-me-be-lucky
    Sorry to hear about the hospital result, but you'd rather have a warning than not, so hopefully it can eventually be seen as a positive thing.

    DH has a ‘tick sheet’ for medication. That way we both know if he’s taken them Xx
    Debts @ LBM £23,729.31. Debts @ 08/04/2016 £0

    NSDs achieved in 2018 25/60
    Lbs lost 16/107.
    Savings for Florida £220.00/£1000
    • WannabeFree
    • By WannabeFree 6th Feb 18, 11:39 AM
    • 1,385 Posts
    • 11,612 Thanks
    WannabeFree
    Hope today goes well HH and enjoy the time with DS before he leaves for his next adventure

    x
    “Once you hit rock bottom, that's where you perfectly stand; That's your chance of restarting, but restarting the right way.”
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 2:23 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Well at least it is only 6 quid.

    Hope all goes to plan.
    We have a dusting of snow today.
    Hope it all goes away pronto.
    Originally posted by beanielou
    We've had a few snow flakes in Devon today but it won't settle luckily.

    Sorry to hear about the hospital result, but you'd rather have a warning than not, so hopefully it can eventually be seen as a positive thing.

    DH has a ‘tick sheet’ for medication. That way we both know if he’s taken them Xx
    Originally posted by please-let-me-be-lucky

    Yes he's had a warning to look after himself better so that is fortunate.

    Yes we were wondering about a tick sheet type timetable for his meds in my tablet as I tend to carry it around with me. Then I can update it whichever room I'm in.

    Hope today goes well HH and enjoy the time with DS before he leaves for his next adventure

    x
    Originally posted by WannabeFree
    Thanks Wannabe
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 2:26 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I spent £70.37 in Mr T, and then bought DS2 some Green & Blacks mini bars of organic chocolate as a going away present for £4 . So not bad at all at £74.37 overall .

    DH has gone with DS2 to get some dollars and then we can finish his travel instructions.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 6th Feb 18, 2:35 PM
    • 6,255 Posts
    • 12,384 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Sorry to hear about your DHs TIA and hope he manages to address his health issues. It is always easier to exercise in the warmer weather but the diet could be addressed now. Is it worth having a complete purge of unhealthy food and just not buying it so he is not tempted?

    Maybe an exercise bike to use indoors? You can usually pick one up at a reasonable rate second hand. We have one to get rid of ourselves since my DD decided to use the gym instead of finding room for the bike and we use a gym too.
    Debt free and mortgage free and early retiree. Living the dream

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages and Endowments, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 4:51 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Thank you for your suggestions ES .

    We do eat healthily in the sense that I don't buy chocolate, biscuits, cakes, desserts or sweets regularly. DH is only allowed chips or similar twice a week (the rest of the time it's baked potato or wholewheat pasta). DH is the only one out of the five of us who is noticeably overweight. The problem is his portion sizes and lack of exercise. He stress eats and gets through lots of bread etc.

    I've spent 20 years trying and failing to get him to lose weight and decided in the end that only he can do it. The more I tried the more obstinate he got, if you know what I mean .

    I am definitely encouaging him to do more exercise at the moment however. Hopefully he will do the Pokemon walks with DS1, and we're going to go to another NT place for a walk next weekend.

    We've had exercise equipment in the past that has just gathered dust as he finds it boring to use. He really is a hopeless case .

    I can only hope that this scare will make him take his health more seriously. At least he doen't smoke and is teetotal, so he has that going for him .
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 6th Feb 18, 8:26 PM
    • 1,587 Posts
    • 9,450 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Can you get the boys involved by stealth? Can they get him to do more by doing it with him - which would be good for everyone.

    Can you reduce the carbs and increase the veg without blowing your budget? Half of every plate should be veg and all that. Boiled eggs to snack on rather than bread. I keep a few in the fridge for when OH has the munchies.
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 8:49 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Thanks for the suggestions Redo .

    DS1 is fully on board, and I told DS3 about the TIA today so he would understand why DH would be giving him less lifts. I'll tell DS2 when he gets back from America, but we don't see much of him generally even when he's at home.

    I probably could decrease the carbs and increase the veg if I stick with cheap things like carrots and peas. DH can't stand boiled vegetables, but I could bake carrots and stir fry vegetables, or include more veg in curries.

    I hate cooking but I must make more effort.

    Boiled eggs to snack on could work. DH gets bored with his food very quickly, so I need to think of some other cheap but nutritious snacks for him too. Maybe I could get him some reduced fat houmous to dip carrot and celery sticks into.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 6th Feb 18, 9:06 PM
    • 1,587 Posts
    • 9,450 Thanks
    redofromstart
    If you can be bothered you can make your own hummus very cheaply:

    Very basic Hummus
    Drain a tin of chickpeas. Add them to food processor with 2 tablespoons of lemon juice, 2 tablespoons of oil, 2 tablespoons of water and half teaspoon of cumin. Blend until they form a smooth paste.
    Can add garlic powder (which is gloriously cheap) for flavour.

    Root vegetable curry type things? Would they appeal? Was thinking of the MrT stew pack at 50p this week which was good value for the contents.
    Soup - minus the bread so would that work?
    Will he eat lentils?
    Will he eat white fish?

    Head not working, I will have a think.
    Last edited by redofromstart; 06-02-2018 at 9:08 PM.
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 9:18 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    He will eat lentils and white fish. He does like root vegetables but I'd have to add some flavour to them before he'd eat them.

    I don't have a food processor unfortunately and DS2 and 3 broke the blender by using it to make flapjacks .

    DH says he would eat natural yoghurt to dip veggies in, as he could add herbs etc to jazz it up.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 6th Feb 18, 9:24 PM
    • 52,619 Posts
    • 206,466 Thanks
    beanielou
    YOu could get a wee cheapie hand blender.
    MIne is great.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 6th Feb 18, 9:30 PM
    • 3,868 Posts
    • 25,638 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    We could look out for a cheap one maybe.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Then save up for repairs to the house.
    Emergency Fund 1 = £530/Emergency Fund 2 = £0/Loss of Income Fund £0
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

791Posts Today

5,756Users online

Martin's Twitter