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    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 25th Jul 17, 11:47 PM
    • 15,414Posts
    • 51,879Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Buffy Keeps on the Straight and Narrow
    • #1
    • 25th Jul 17, 11:47 PM
    Buffy Keeps on the Straight and Narrow 25th Jul 17 at 11:47 PM
    Hello,

    I used to post here loads and loads, I have been debt free since 2011 but I am due dental work (yes finally!) and need glasses and work done on the car, the house and the garden so am going to do a 0% balance transfer if I can time everything right and then work very hard on paying it off.

    I do have some savings but they are staying as an emergency fund, I like the security they give me. Plus they may well not be enough. In the back of my mind I think I am due a tax rebate as well, not had time to investigate yet.

    Some things have changed and some things stay the same. As a family we are having a very hard time and that is partly why I am back, I need a reminder not spend all the time and to try to find the cheapest ways to do things. Especially eating.

    Lately I have been buying things from Amazon like it doesn't cost me a thing and do not even get me started on the contactless payment option.....it is really bad!!

    I get paid tomorrow so a little sort out of the budgets and then an investigation of 0% BT offers.

    Love

    Buffy
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
Page 42
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 6th Nov 18, 11:33 PM
    • 5,477 Posts
    • 32,989 Thanks
    in need of direction
    It's known as Fakebook for a reason. It is the work of the devil and even more evil than sugar or plastic. Stop it
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 119,481.83 today 71,743.47, target 65,000 by 05/04/19 Offset fund today 412.27 target 5,500 by 05/04/19
    Emergency fund 1,100/5.5k & 200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 6th Nov 18, 11:45 PM
    • 3,679 Posts
    • 10,405 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Dump Facebook today, it's all about "look at me, look at me" (quote by Julia Styles from film 10 Things I hate about you) said with attitude. It is not the place to talk about your actual life. No-one & I do mean no-one's life is actually like they post on there. You are comparing a romance novel with reality. Please don't!
    Originally posted by badmemory

    That's not my experience of FB at all. I use it to stay in touch with real life friends who I wouldn't easily keep up with otherwise (in some cases because they are far away and/ or housebound) and I am part of several lovely and supportive groups including on women's style, campervan owners and sports. People bring questions and problems to those groups and receive thoughtful and helpful answers. I certainly post my own real life on there because I don't see the point in doing anything else, and it's to swop funnies and update people not show off. I doubt very much that my friends posting about their illnesses, disabilities, challenges and grief are doing it to make their lives look like romance novels either.

    FB is just a tool, it has no power of its own. It only reflects who you choose to hang out with, and you can change that in a few clicks. There is no need to tolerate anything on there that makes you feel bad and equally no need to miss out on a real rapid access support network.
    Last edited by RosaBernicia; 06-11-2018 at 11:55 PM.
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 5% ...
    Campervan loan progress 14%

    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 6th Nov 18, 11:53 PM
    • 3,679 Posts
    • 10,405 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Kind of broken today.

    Feeling really down. hurt.

    sick of everything I touch going wrong, things not working out.

    so over getting my hopes up and having them dashed on the floor.

    Tired of all my friends having !!!! lives. and having !!!! things happen.

    Yes I am feeling epic-ally sorry for myself, but after today I am having a break from being positive, I have been avoiding the news, cut out some groups from FB, avoided moaning on FB, looked for the good, last have term I made an effort to go out. I am TRYING.

    and still the !!!! for everyone I care about keeps coming. And yes I know it doesn't bloody work like that. but nothing good is happening. THere are no positives here and I do not know what the bloody point is of trying so hard.

    I need to work something else out. Some other plan. an answer, a system that makes me feel better that forces me to work. I am not even really looking for answers here, am too angry. too lost. Done.
    Originally posted by Buffythedebtslayer

    Buffster, sorry you're having a rotten time - sending virtual hugs.

    Have you had a chat with someone about your situation? Like your GP? You sound exhausted, frankly, and I'm a bit worried that sadness and depression can blur together. And I don't think you need a plan that forces you to work, I think you need a break.

    Also, you're entirely flaming entitled to have a non positive day and to do it to the max if you want. Would door slamming, crockery smashing and/ or howling at sad movies help?


    Rosa xx
    Last edited by RosaBernicia; 06-11-2018 at 11:55 PM.
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 5% ...
    Campervan loan progress 14%

    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 7th Nov 18, 12:10 AM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Facebook is definitely not the problem!

    I am really careful what I put on there and as Rosa says, it is a tool, it is full of my friends, both in real life and here, and other places from my past (sounds mysterious, isn't). I love it to be honest. I left a couple of time wasting groups that was all I meant.


    I am unhappy today because there is just more disappointment for both me and friends. And one friend got some devastating news that her father is dying. I am just sick of it.

    As I said there is nothing good.

    Can't even slam the door too many animals around i might decapitate!

    Still written a good lesson. tired enough that I will sleep.

    Thank you all XXXX This place is definitely my safe place.

    XXX
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 7th Nov 18, 8:09 AM
    • 5,477 Posts
    • 32,989 Thanks
    in need of direction
    You say there's nothing good at the minute but can't slam a door because of too many animals. What if you couldn't afford any pets?
    My dog is something I am so grateful for. I know things are bad but you do have a lot of good in your life. You maybe need to give 5 mins to recognising it.
    Here endeth the sermon. Take care
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 119,481.83 today 71,743.47, target 65,000 by 05/04/19 Offset fund today 412.27 target 5,500 by 05/04/19
    Emergency fund 1,100/5.5k & 200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 7th Nov 18, 6:12 PM
    • 3,679 Posts
    • 10,405 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Um, *pokes Buffy gently in arm* you didn't answer my question about the GP...


    Do you have an employee support service or anything else that might get you a bit of counselling? I'm glad you have safe space here, but I think you could do with some in real time with all you've got going on.





    Rosa xx
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 5% ...
    Campervan loan progress 14%

    • crazy_cat_lady
    • By crazy_cat_lady 7th Nov 18, 7:55 PM
    • 4,434 Posts
    • 38,322 Thanks
    crazy_cat_lady
    Lots of love Buffy.
    The hopeless feeling will pass - most important is that you're not giving up.
    NST Join in January #1 nsd = 11 1 debt vs 100 days #5 50/553 Pay all your debt by Xmas '19 #56: 114.40/5750
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 9th Nov 18, 8:16 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    I made it through the rest of the week. I didn't bunk off work. I didn't lose my rag.

    Been bloody hard tho. Bed early tonight. Everywhere is tense and achy.

    thanks for being here during the week.

    XXXXXXXX
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 9th Nov 18, 9:05 PM
    • 60,094 Posts
    • 252,387 Thanks
    beanielou
    Glad you survived the weekend Buffy.
    Hope you can have a relaxing weekend.
    Hope that the dog is settling down xxx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • crazy_cat_lady
    • By crazy_cat_lady 10th Nov 18, 9:54 PM
    • 4,434 Posts
    • 38,322 Thanks
    crazy_cat_lady
    Hope that you're managing to switch off and relax a bit this weekend Buffy.
    NST Join in January #1 nsd = 11 1 debt vs 100 days #5 50/553 Pay all your debt by Xmas '19 #56: 114.40/5750
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Nov 18, 10:02 PM
    • 60,094 Posts
    • 252,387 Thanks
    beanielou
    Hope you have a nice glass of something in your hand
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 16th Nov 18, 10:17 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    I have a crush on a bloke at work.

    I just had to share.

    It is ridiculous. He complimented me in an e mail the other day. You would think the Pope had sainted me.

    It is lovely to look at him. Like seriously lovely. Like a little holiday from reality. And he is so kind.



    Anyhow loads to do so now I have shared entirely non money related news I shall go off and do something really boring (and free) like sort out my documents............................
    Last edited by Buffythedebtslayer; 16-11-2018 at 11:11 PM.
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 17th Nov 18, 6:39 PM
    • 60,094 Posts
    • 252,387 Thanks
    beanielou
    I have a crush on a bloke at work.

    I just had to share.

    It is ridiculous. He complimented me in an e mail the other day. You would think the Pope had sainted me.

    It is lovely to look at him. Like seriously lovely. Like a little holiday from reality. And he is so kind.



    Anyhow loads to do so now I have shared entirely non money related news I shall go off and do something really boring (and free) like sort out my documents............................
    Originally posted by Buffythedebtslayer
    As long as it makes you happy Buffy xxx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 22nd Nov 18, 9:37 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Hello folks

    I just worked out how much I get paid. Can't believe I am in so much debt.

    Simply cannot believe it.

    Any how. I am 5100 in debt

    however the rabbits are outside (and of course the temps dropped dramatically!)

    So things can move on.

    Had migraine for the last 3 days tho. Suspect it is rabbit stress! so off to bed soon
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 22nd Nov 18, 9:41 PM
    • 60,094 Posts
    • 252,387 Thanks
    beanielou
    Well on the bright side Buffy the debt is not a high percentage of your income so that is not as bad as it could be.
    Keep plodding my friend xxx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 22nd Nov 18, 10:43 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Well on the bright side Buffy the debt is not a high percentage of your income so that is not as bad as it could be.
    Keep plodding my friend xxx
    Originally posted by beanielou
    Yeah.


    This is true and if I can get my !!!! together it won't take long to pay it off.


    It is funny isn't it, it comes to the end of the year and you review what you have done and ok, 2017 got somewhat destroyed through no one's fault. 2018 has been a struggle. A period of adjustment. Work is generally better. Family is hard.

    The garden is nearly done. The rabbits are secure. I can pick up house wise where I left it about 18 months.

    Oh yeah, I am buying a new to me car as mine is on the verge of some thing catastrophic. I have the savings. After that I have 0.

    I was talking to the cleaner today (at work) and she is buying a car. She is doing a monthly deal for a 2 year old car. Mine is going to be 20 years old. 1250 VW.

    I am not sure how I feel about that. I suppose at some point I should do that. I just never wanted to get into debt over a car.

    xxxx
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • Pooky
    • By Pooky 23rd Nov 18, 7:19 AM
    • 6,833 Posts
    • 44,321 Thanks
    Pooky
    Blimey that seems a lot for a 20 year old car! Would a lease type thing be more suitable?

    Yay to the rabbits being outside though, they will soon have their winter coats on and be enjoying their freedom. And you can have yours! I bet it feels amazing to have a bit of space back?

    As Beanie says, debt wise compared to what you earn isn't bad and you know you're on top of knowing where it's been spent, these things happen.

    How's the crush going? Is he attached? Going to be brave and ask him out?
    "Start every day off with a smile and get it over with" - W. C. Field.
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 23rd Nov 18, 9:30 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    It only have 65000 miles on the clock and has 4 new tyres, some thing like a cam belt and something else. I know what you mean tho.

    It does feel amazing. Lovely in fact. Warm room. Door open.

    Crush went on a date last night. This information has devastated me. Like really really broke me. I managed to keep it together when he told me. Left work and drove around for ages trying to work out what to do. Oh God will I be 86 and doing this? Fixating on a boy and AGAIN having nothing happen. I am already too !!!!ing old for this crap, to live like this with these highs and crashing lows.

    I went shopping bought new perfume and other "beauty type" stuff. Oh and shampoo. I decided last week that I would decluttter this weekend and now this has happened it is urgent that there is a significant change in my life. I need space to work and exercise and be. Can't do that surrounded by CRAP physical mental or emotional. Need to get clear. Make room for better things.

    XXXXX
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 23rd Nov 18, 9:57 PM
    • 6,635 Posts
    • 46,939 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    If said crush is available, would you have the courage to invite him for a social beverage then take it from there ...

    If you don't try, you don't get, he can only say no.

    Big hugs Buffster xx
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2019 91.46
    Debt 1570
    Weight loss 1.5/9LBS
    Emergency Fund 3266.50/10,000
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 23rd Nov 18, 10:16 PM
    • 15,414 Posts
    • 51,879 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    If said crush is available, would you have the courage to invite him for a social beverage then take it from there ...

    If you don't try, you don't get, he can only say no.

    Big hugs Buffster xx
    Originally posted by Sun Addict

    He asked(a part of group) - twice but both times I have had to rush off for family stuff so think I always look "busy" and off limits.

    Honestly SA. I am SO gutted.

    Just hope it doesn't work out with the date - but that feels mean!!
    Sealed Pot 12 - 008, 365, 1p a day, 1%, 100 days, Saving to be out of debt!
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