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  • FIRST POST
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 25th Jul 17, 11:47 PM
    • 15,336Posts
    • 51,360Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Buffy Keeps on the Straight and Narrow
    • #1
    • 25th Jul 17, 11:47 PM
    Buffy Keeps on the Straight and Narrow 25th Jul 17 at 11:47 PM
    Hello,

    I used to post here loads and loads, I have been debt free since 2011 but I am due dental work (yes finally!) and need glasses and work done on the car, the house and the garden so am going to do a 0% balance transfer if I can time everything right and then work very hard on paying it off.

    I do have some savings but they are staying as an emergency fund, I like the security they give me. Plus they may well not be enough. In the back of my mind I think I am due a tax rebate as well, not had time to investigate yet.

    Some things have changed and some things stay the same. As a family we are having a very hard time and that is partly why I am back, I need a reminder not spend all the time and to try to find the cheapest ways to do things. Especially eating.

    Lately I have been buying things from Amazon like it doesn't cost me a thing and do not even get me started on the contactless payment option.....it is really bad!!

    I get paid tomorrow so a little sort out of the budgets and then an investigation of 0% BT offers.

    Love

    Buffy
    Frugal Living Challenge, Pound a Day challenge, Sealed Pot Challenge Debt 4990 (March)
Page 42
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 6th Nov 18, 11:33 PM
    • 5,340 Posts
    • 31,631 Thanks
    in need of direction
    It's known as Fakebook for a reason. It is the work of the devil and even more evil than sugar or plastic. Stop it
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 119,481.83 today 72,374.15, target 65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today 377.27 target 5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund 1,100/5.5k & 200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 6th Nov 18, 11:45 PM
    • 3,597 Posts
    • 9,956 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Dump Facebook today, it's all about "look at me, look at me" (quote by Julia Styles from film 10 Things I hate about you) said with attitude. It is not the place to talk about your actual life. No-one & I do mean no-one's life is actually like they post on there. You are comparing a romance novel with reality. Please don't!
    Originally posted by badmemory

    That's not my experience of FB at all. I use it to stay in touch with real life friends who I wouldn't easily keep up with otherwise (in some cases because they are far away and/ or housebound) and I am part of several lovely and supportive groups including on women's style, campervan owners and sports. People bring questions and problems to those groups and receive thoughtful and helpful answers. I certainly post my own real life on there because I don't see the point in doing anything else, and it's to swop funnies and update people not show off. I doubt very much that my friends posting about their illnesses, disabilities, challenges and grief are doing it to make their lives look like romance novels either.

    FB is just a tool, it has no power of its own. It only reflects who you choose to hang out with, and you can change that in a few clicks. There is no need to tolerate anything on there that makes you feel bad and equally no need to miss out on a real rapid access support network.
    Last edited by RosaBernicia; 06-11-2018 at 11:55 PM.
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 4.8% ...
    Campervan loan progress 6%

    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 6th Nov 18, 11:53 PM
    • 3,597 Posts
    • 9,956 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Kind of broken today.

    Feeling really down. hurt.

    sick of everything I touch going wrong, things not working out.

    so over getting my hopes up and having them dashed on the floor.

    Tired of all my friends having !!!! lives. and having !!!! things happen.

    Yes I am feeling epic-ally sorry for myself, but after today I am having a break from being positive, I have been avoiding the news, cut out some groups from FB, avoided moaning on FB, looked for the good, last have term I made an effort to go out. I am TRYING.

    and still the !!!! for everyone I care about keeps coming. And yes I know it doesn't bloody work like that. but nothing good is happening. THere are no positives here and I do not know what the bloody point is of trying so hard.

    I need to work something else out. Some other plan. an answer, a system that makes me feel better that forces me to work. I am not even really looking for answers here, am too angry. too lost. Done.
    Originally posted by Buffythedebtslayer

    Buffster, sorry you're having a rotten time - sending virtual hugs.

    Have you had a chat with someone about your situation? Like your GP? You sound exhausted, frankly, and I'm a bit worried that sadness and depression can blur together. And I don't think you need a plan that forces you to work, I think you need a break.

    Also, you're entirely flaming entitled to have a non positive day and to do it to the max if you want. Would door slamming, crockery smashing and/ or howling at sad movies help?


    Rosa xx
    Last edited by RosaBernicia; 06-11-2018 at 11:55 PM.
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 4.8% ...
    Campervan loan progress 6%

    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 7th Nov 18, 12:10 AM
    • 15,336 Posts
    • 51,360 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    Facebook is definitely not the problem!

    I am really careful what I put on there and as Rosa says, it is a tool, it is full of my friends, both in real life and here, and other places from my past (sounds mysterious, isn't). I love it to be honest. I left a couple of time wasting groups that was all I meant.


    I am unhappy today because there is just more disappointment for both me and friends. And one friend got some devastating news that her father is dying. I am just sick of it.

    As I said there is nothing good.

    Can't even slam the door too many animals around i might decapitate!

    Still written a good lesson. tired enough that I will sleep.

    Thank you all XXXX This place is definitely my safe place.

    XXX
    Frugal Living Challenge, Pound a Day challenge, Sealed Pot Challenge Debt 4990 (March)
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 7th Nov 18, 8:09 AM
    • 5,340 Posts
    • 31,631 Thanks
    in need of direction
    You say there's nothing good at the minute but can't slam a door because of too many animals. What if you couldn't afford any pets?
    My dog is something I am so grateful for. I know things are bad but you do have a lot of good in your life. You maybe need to give 5 mins to recognising it.
    Here endeth the sermon. Take care
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 119,481.83 today 72,374.15, target 65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today 377.27 target 5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund 1,100/5.5k & 200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • RosaBernicia
    • By RosaBernicia 7th Nov 18, 6:12 PM
    • 3,597 Posts
    • 9,956 Thanks
    RosaBernicia
    Um, *pokes Buffy gently in arm* you didn't answer my question about the GP...


    Do you have an employee support service or anything else that might get you a bit of counselling? I'm glad you have safe space here, but I think you could do with some in real time with all you've got going on.





    Rosa xx
    Debt free May 2016
    MFW progress 4.8% ...
    Campervan loan progress 6%

    • crazy_cat_lady
    • By crazy_cat_lady 7th Nov 18, 7:55 PM
    • 4,126 Posts
    • 35,315 Thanks
    crazy_cat_lady
    Lots of love Buffy.
    The hopeless feeling will pass - most important is that you're not giving up.
    November in NY #20 NSD = 9 1 debt vs 100 days 328.51/1685
    DFD #1: 6 Nov 15 - paid 28,447
    • Buffythedebtslayer
    • By Buffythedebtslayer 9th Nov 18, 8:16 PM
    • 15,336 Posts
    • 51,360 Thanks
    Buffythedebtslayer
    I made it through the rest of the week. I didn't bunk off work. I didn't lose my rag.

    Been bloody hard tho. Bed early tonight. Everywhere is tense and achy.

    thanks for being here during the week.

    XXXXXXXX
    Frugal Living Challenge, Pound a Day challenge, Sealed Pot Challenge Debt 4990 (March)
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 9th Nov 18, 9:05 PM
    • 58,039 Posts
    • 238,895 Thanks
    beanielou
    Glad you survived the weekend Buffy.
    Hope you can have a relaxing weekend.
    Hope that the dog is settling down xxx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. MFW 2018. No 144
    • crazy_cat_lady
    • By crazy_cat_lady 10th Nov 18, 9:54 PM
    • 4,126 Posts
    • 35,315 Thanks
    crazy_cat_lady
    Hope that you're managing to switch off and relax a bit this weekend Buffy.
    November in NY #20 NSD = 9 1 debt vs 100 days 328.51/1685
    DFD #1: 6 Nov 15 - paid 28,447
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Nov 18, 10:02 PM
    • 58,039 Posts
    • 238,895 Thanks
    beanielou
    Hope you have a nice glass of something in your hand
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 12 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger. MFW 2018. No 144
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