Evening all, have been recovering from our 5 days in Wales! We stayed at a fab hotel, had amazing weather and enjoyed a couple of walks. The recovery is needed because we were trying to look after the in-laws and give them a great holiday but I am not sure we managed it. We found out how well they had been hiding their physical frailties, to the point when I actually borrowed a wheelchair for MIL on one trip because i knew she had taken more painkillers for her arthritis on the way there. It took a little white lie* to pursaude her to get into it (I told her we could get into the venue free if she was in a wheelchair, but in fact I had already paid!). Once in the chair she was happy enough being wheeled. * I confessed later and told her I just wanted her to be in less pain and to be able to enjoy the event rather than endure the torture of trying to walk round.
They basically looked pretty helpless at times.
FIL refuses to use a walking stick despite tottering along and confessing to nearly falling in the street twice in one morning this week.
We are at a loss to know what to do because he has always been stubborn and clearly sees any aids to daily living as a sign of weakness and an afront to his machismo. DH has very upset to see the reality and is struggling with it.
It is such a contrast to my dad who, despite being very poorly for 5 or 6 years, did everything to try and make life work for him. He happily used a stick because he didn't want to fall, he bought various aids and asked for help when needed. Common sense to me.
I wonder if the advice / medical services could employ a few old blokes to speak sense to other old blokes?? I guess they don't want some younger person, esp a female person, to give them 'so called' advice about using a walking stick
Thank you, Fencers, for letting me vent.
I should clarify that I am not cross with them for not enjoying the holiday to the full! I feel that DH and I failed to give them the holiday they deserved and I feel so sorry for them both, but esp FIL who is clearly not dealing with either the physical or mental issues of old age.
I have changed my work-life balance to a life-work balance.