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    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 20th Apr 17, 3:59 PM
    • 5,125Posts
    • 29,904Thanks
    in need of direction
    A whole new world, for now
    • #1
    • 20th Apr 17, 3:59 PM
    A whole new world, for now 20th Apr 17 at 3:59 PM
    So, hereís the new thread Iíve been promising myself for a few months. My old one, that served me so well, is http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4855808

    A potted history of me. Iím 49, live in NI with OH, DD and dog and DS is London based.
    Have been in debt for a lot of my life and came here post personal debt but with the aim to clear my mortgage. I believe DFD to be the right place for me as a lot of whatís outstanding on the mortgage related to consolidation of other debts. The rates were lower and I just didnít consider the payback period.
    Having been a wage slave for some 30 years, I recently jacked in my well paid and secure job for a number of reasons. While I love what I do, I hated the environment in which I did it. I regularly travelled 6 hours a day, on my own time and had to ask others to do likewise. That was the downside about caring for my clients. While I continued, and got others, to deliver at the expense of my home life, my health and my finances, the firm continued to let me. I decided that Iíd sooner have some self respect than stay there. We also had an unexpected and untimely family bereavement last year which sparked the whole ďlifeís too shortĒ train of thought. The downside is this is the first time since I was 17 that I donít have an income and itís a big adjustment.
    To address this, Iíve decided to go the self employed route, for now (hence the title). One problem though is timing. We have booked a holiday in May for OHís big birthday and Iíve decided that is set in stone. We will be travelling half way round the world for two weeks to initially see pandas and then the delights of Tokyo. Weíve only been together just over 10 years so this is really our first landmark birthday to be properly celebrated, we were still bedding in last big date.
    So, work wise, Iíve created my website, taken out a separate mobile contract and opened a business bank account. Iíve also registered with HMRC to keep things tidy.
    Otherwise, since being unemployed, Iíve had a parking ticket refunded, gained a free overnight stay following a complaint to a hotel that disappointed and have signed up for a new loyalty card for my local Co-Op. I also switched to a cheaper mobile service and got my boiler serviced which restored the hot water! First world pleasure that is so easy to overlook. I've donated two bikes to a local charity, done a number of strolls to offload donations to charity shop, claimed topcashback, £20 from PA, £5 swagbucks voucher and am trying to declutter. My last car went with the job so I realised what a paucity of local shops there in despite being only 15 mins by bus from the city centre.
    The lack of car was proving to be an issue for family and other reasons so today we get a PCH car delivered that we have committed to for 4 years. This takes us into the realm of needing to use the mortgage off set savings to fund expenses. It also gives me a minimum level of income to achieve as eating into savings bothers me.
    So, whatís the plan?
    I lodged £2000 in my business bank account at the start of March and most of it is still there. By September, Iíd like to have this repaid to either the savings or the mortgage or to have secured an income stream that will enable that to happen shortly thereafter. Iíd also like a £1k buffer in the business account to make sure that I can take advantage of opportunities as they arise.
    I have applied for a few part time consultancy type posts, been unsuccessful at interview for the first, but will actively seek out these opportunities. Iíve provided associates with my contact details but come June, I will start more actively promoting myself. Iíve sought input from my LA business support services but to little avail so far. Iíve attended a few courses and networking events and will continue with these to keep some kind of a profile and, post holiday, will be creating an event that will hopefully income generate and/or build profile.
    I will continue to seek out vouchers and deals and will try to live cheaply but donít feel I can ask this of the others in the house as giving up the job was down to me. I will also get rid of extraneous items, for cash where possible.
    What I can see is that despite living semi frugally, or so I believed, we wasted A LOT!
    Today my outstanding mortgage is £83,478.58. By 31 Dec, based on just making standard payments, this will be £78,900. My target is for this to be £75,000.
    Today my available off set pot is £3,415.43. By 31 Dec, Iíd like this to be at £5,500.
    The truth is Iíd like the first figure to be a lot lower and the second to be a lot higher but I need to start somewhere.
    We still have our emergency fund intact and hopefully enough in the current account to address our living expenses shortfall at least to the year end. Spends for the holiday are ringfenced with any left overs going on extras for all.
    I have to confess to having what Iíve heard described as an internal Verucca Salt! When I want it, I want it now. I need to learn some restraint both in terms of shopping and also sugar consumption. Itís weird but one thing |I really struggle with is what to have for lunch.
    Anyhow, now that the car is here, Iím off to the dry cleaners and to pick up some groceries as I have a £5 voucher off a £25 shop. I may also buy a new toilet brush!
    Today I am grateful for
    The support I have consistently received from here

    Company from the dog

    E Mail
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £74,745.76, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £297.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.2/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
Page 44
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 13th Jul 18, 2:36 PM
    • 55,410 Posts
    • 222,198 Thanks
    beanielou
    Big huggles my friend xxx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • jwil
    • By jwil 13th Jul 18, 2:38 PM
    • 8,664 Posts
    • 26,842 Thanks
    jwil
    Hugs from me too x
    "If you can dream it, you can do it". Walt Disney
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 13th Jul 18, 8:50 PM
    • 4,562 Posts
    • 31,774 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Today I am so sad. This is the last day that the dog will be living with us and tomorrow is dd's turn to depart. While they have a track record of coming and going, dd's commitment to her masters and work placement means that they can only be visitors over the next 2 years and who knows what will happen beyond that. They will be back for 2 weeks later this summer but it's not the same as living here. I feel very lonely and very scared.
    Originally posted by in need of direction
    I'm sorry INOD . I know nothing can replace DD but would it be worth getting a dog of your own?

    One thing I do know is that we have the ability to adapt to any situation in time, no matter how sad. I learnt this after the death of my sister.

    You will always miss DD but you won't always feel sad and lonely. X
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • doingitanyway
    • By doingitanyway 13th Jul 18, 9:50 PM
    • 3,129 Posts
    • 16,327 Thanks
    doingitanyway
    So sorry about the dog INOD. i feel for you.
    JANUARY 2016/SECURED DEBT=24,822/March 2018=0 DEBT FREE 23/03/18
    MORTGAGE FREE 25/07/16
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 14th Jul 18, 10:43 AM
    • 5,125 Posts
    • 29,904 Thanks
    in need of direction
    Thanks so much for all hugs, etc. truly appreciated

    dog was dropped off yesterday to holiday at the beach. She didn't even give us a backward glance. DH came too and treated us all to an early bird dinner in one of my fav places that was only about a 15 mile detour. Did some bits and pieces of work yesterday and got some items into the now bulging freezer. I've also started to pick raspberries that will also be frozen as I'm not a big fan but the offspring will have them with oats and yogurt.

    DD's father has decided that he will bring her to the airport today. Last time he offered he confused check in time with departure time so I did it. It'll be interesting to see what happens. She will go see my mother before she goes. This afternoon will be spent either cutting down some hedging or de dog hairing the living room. We will also once again have access to the laundry facilities that DD tied up as she packed.
    It's weird that I'm struggling with departures this time. DD has been taking off for more than 12 years but the longest unbroken stay has been 6 months. Maybe it's in part due to DS settling in England after uni that I see this as such a difference. Plus, she has never before relocated the dog.

    I could not face getting another dog. I said that after the death of our 16 year old 15 years ago. The dd's father got her this dog that was supposed to live at his. They had a row and the dog came to us for a week or two. That was close to 6 years ago. Another dog will be my retirement present to myself. I'm not a fan of mini dogs and I really struggle with having a dog cooped up all day if we are at work. Our back garden is not secure enough for a dog to stay there during the day.

    Anyhow, once I get past the departure, I will be ok. Just need to keep a lid on things for another 3 hours. Wish me luck
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £74,745.76, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £297.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.2/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 14th Jul 18, 9:08 PM
    • 55,410 Posts
    • 222,198 Thanks
    beanielou
    Positive vibes your way.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 15th Jul 18, 12:16 AM
    • 1,847 Posts
    • 10,019 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Hope it's gone as well as possible. Have some more hugs xx
    MFW #30 Paid off £2,109.13/£3770 as of 12/7/18
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 15th Jul 18, 9:56 AM
    • 5,125 Posts
    • 29,904 Thanks
    in need of direction
    Thanks peeps, things went better than expected. She has gone. She booked an extra hold bag on as she has a very grand event to attend next week and had forgotten about bringing an appropriate dress. Also, her granny gave her some money so she only had £1 of her own to add to it. She spent last night with DS and the plan is to head there after her 5 weeks to drop off a bag, returning home with a smaller one before packing up for a permanent place.

    Yesterday, we got all laundry cleared up inc some summer refresh washing. Most of it was dry by bedtime and before the rain hit. It is still raining and it has cooled things down so the plan is to fire up the press and get all ironing done in one go. That will result in the kitchen table being completely clear which is a rare occurrence. Due to last week's bank holiday here, our bin collection for general waste and garden waste was moved to today. Yesterday, I attacked hedges at the side of the house and we put out 2 full brown bins. Ironically, DH suggested that I leave them and he would do them. I've only been asking for the past year! How can he not have known? Still, I bit my tongue and put him to work dismantling the wooden cover for pipes that had been lying in the garden since February! Odd how it's only me who sees these things.
    Also, last night we dined on the leftovers from various meals that would otherwise have gone out of date. Fingers crossed there will be more of that and inroads will be made to the freezer. My dinner included carrot and parsnip made with carrots that had been whoopsied to 10p.

    So, today will be a discussion with mr wii about my weight, ironing, de furring the living room and some work stuff in prep for the coming week. Oh, I will also wait to make my millions from items closing on eBay this evening even though there are only offers on 3 of the 7 and they are the cheaper ones.

    Today I am grateful for
    Unnecessary items leaving the house forever, this includes 2 books to a sister
    Save travel
    Salvaging food just in time
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £74,745.76, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £297.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.2/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Weight 8 July 14st 4lb
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
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