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  • FIRST POST
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 20th Apr 17, 3:59 PM
    • 5,058Posts
    • 29,373Thanks
    in need of direction
    A whole new world, for now
    • #1
    • 20th Apr 17, 3:59 PM
    A whole new world, for now 20th Apr 17 at 3:59 PM
    So, hereís the new thread Iíve been promising myself for a few months. My old one, that served me so well, is http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4855808

    A potted history of me. Iím 49, live in NI with OH, DD and dog and DS is London based.
    Have been in debt for a lot of my life and came here post personal debt but with the aim to clear my mortgage. I believe DFD to be the right place for me as a lot of whatís outstanding on the mortgage related to consolidation of other debts. The rates were lower and I just didnít consider the payback period.
    Having been a wage slave for some 30 years, I recently jacked in my well paid and secure job for a number of reasons. While I love what I do, I hated the environment in which I did it. I regularly travelled 6 hours a day, on my own time and had to ask others to do likewise. That was the downside about caring for my clients. While I continued, and got others, to deliver at the expense of my home life, my health and my finances, the firm continued to let me. I decided that Iíd sooner have some self respect than stay there. We also had an unexpected and untimely family bereavement last year which sparked the whole ďlifeís too shortĒ train of thought. The downside is this is the first time since I was 17 that I donít have an income and itís a big adjustment.
    To address this, Iíve decided to go the self employed route, for now (hence the title). One problem though is timing. We have booked a holiday in May for OHís big birthday and Iíve decided that is set in stone. We will be travelling half way round the world for two weeks to initially see pandas and then the delights of Tokyo. Weíve only been together just over 10 years so this is really our first landmark birthday to be properly celebrated, we were still bedding in last big date.
    So, work wise, Iíve created my website, taken out a separate mobile contract and opened a business bank account. Iíve also registered with HMRC to keep things tidy.
    Otherwise, since being unemployed, Iíve had a parking ticket refunded, gained a free overnight stay following a complaint to a hotel that disappointed and have signed up for a new loyalty card for my local Co-Op. I also switched to a cheaper mobile service and got my boiler serviced which restored the hot water! First world pleasure that is so easy to overlook. I've donated two bikes to a local charity, done a number of strolls to offload donations to charity shop, claimed topcashback, £20 from PA, £5 swagbucks voucher and am trying to declutter. My last car went with the job so I realised what a paucity of local shops there in despite being only 15 mins by bus from the city centre.
    The lack of car was proving to be an issue for family and other reasons so today we get a PCH car delivered that we have committed to for 4 years. This takes us into the realm of needing to use the mortgage off set savings to fund expenses. It also gives me a minimum level of income to achieve as eating into savings bothers me.
    So, whatís the plan?
    I lodged £2000 in my business bank account at the start of March and most of it is still there. By September, Iíd like to have this repaid to either the savings or the mortgage or to have secured an income stream that will enable that to happen shortly thereafter. Iíd also like a £1k buffer in the business account to make sure that I can take advantage of opportunities as they arise.
    I have applied for a few part time consultancy type posts, been unsuccessful at interview for the first, but will actively seek out these opportunities. Iíve provided associates with my contact details but come June, I will start more actively promoting myself. Iíve sought input from my LA business support services but to little avail so far. Iíve attended a few courses and networking events and will continue with these to keep some kind of a profile and, post holiday, will be creating an event that will hopefully income generate and/or build profile.
    I will continue to seek out vouchers and deals and will try to live cheaply but donít feel I can ask this of the others in the house as giving up the job was down to me. I will also get rid of extraneous items, for cash where possible.
    What I can see is that despite living semi frugally, or so I believed, we wasted A LOT!
    Today my outstanding mortgage is £83,478.58. By 31 Dec, based on just making standard payments, this will be £78,900. My target is for this to be £75,000.
    Today my available off set pot is £3,415.43. By 31 Dec, Iíd like this to be at £5,500.
    The truth is Iíd like the first figure to be a lot lower and the second to be a lot higher but I need to start somewhere.
    We still have our emergency fund intact and hopefully enough in the current account to address our living expenses shortfall at least to the year end. Spends for the holiday are ringfenced with any left overs going on extras for all.
    I have to confess to having what Iíve heard described as an internal Verucca Salt! When I want it, I want it now. I need to learn some restraint both in terms of shopping and also sugar consumption. Itís weird but one thing |I really struggle with is what to have for lunch.
    Anyhow, now that the car is here, Iím off to the dry cleaners and to pick up some groceries as I have a £5 voucher off a £25 shop. I may also buy a new toilet brush!
    Today I am grateful for
    The support I have consistently received from here

    Company from the dog

    E Mail
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £75,268.93, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £247.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.7/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Current weight loss RUBBISH need to refocus
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
Page 27
    • Ali-OK
    • By Ali-OK 4th Jan 18, 7:24 PM
    • 4,058 Posts
    • 16,641 Thanks
    Ali-OK
    Subscribed too - I'm back!

    I've a lot of catching up to do with your journey
    Back on the DFW Wagon:

    CC - £3,300 on 0% til 04/2020
    CC - £4,500 on 0% til 02/2019
    Loan - £12,063.84 as at 4/1/18
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 4th Jan 18, 9:30 PM
    • 54,919 Posts
    • 219,275 Thanks
    beanielou
    Good to see you Ali.
    Was just thinking about you the other day.
    Hope all well with you & yours.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • Ali-OK
    • By Ali-OK 4th Jan 18, 9:43 PM
    • 4,058 Posts
    • 16,641 Thanks
    Ali-OK
    Hi Beanie

    Lovely to see you and I'll catch up on your thread too.
    Back on the DFW Wagon:

    CC - £3,300 on 0% til 04/2020
    CC - £4,500 on 0% til 02/2019
    Loan - £12,063.84 as at 4/1/18
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 28th Jan 18, 11:06 AM
    • 5,058 Posts
    • 29,373 Thanks
    in need of direction
    Well, didn't I kick off the year full of determination. However, I've leT myself get totally derailed. I managed to track down my elusive builder about some damp patches. One was due to blocked guttering so was able to cover the £40 from spends. Other has resulted in a £3k bill so emergency fund has taken a massive battering and the work isn't finished yet. New boiler installed indoors rather than in boiler house and lots of associated piping, wiring etc.the boiler house has been weatherproofed but the kitchen plastering still needs dealt with. Long term it should be more fuel efficient and short term there's a saving of about £150 as we needed new controls and it also defers the annual service cost by 10 months. It also reduced the time the heating was on for the week it took me to figure out the new controls! We have however lost some hot press shelving capacity which isn't good.

    Work wise,I'm being kept busy but not profitably so. Lots of business development meetings and promises of good things to come but nothing crystallised yet.

    Jog club has started and stopped for me with approx 50% attendance while Pilates sits at the same. The 6 lessons paid for ends this Thursday and I'm unsure what to do. Six weeks for £54 isn't bad but only if I go to them.

    Interruption en route, will finish post later.
    Last edited by in need of direction; 10-02-2018 at 1:35 PM.
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £75,268.93, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £247.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.7/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Current weight loss RUBBISH need to refocus
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 28th Jan 18, 11:31 AM
    • 5,058 Posts
    • 29,373 Thanks
    in need of direction
    So, moving along. I have been engaging with my coach but today I am gonna send her a long email explaining why I think she is wasting her time. I'm just feeling overwhelmed. She's a great person but very focused with incredibly good lifestyle choices. I'd love to be more like her but I just feel overwhelmed and get into a total tizzy. Did I also mention she is tall, slim and always looks pulled together?

    Anyhow, there have been some small positives. I did 2 TT to my mortgage. Piddling amounts but I need to start somewhere. Planning for our big project continues and costs escalate but we've committed so much that we just need to suck this up. We are still trying to keep things in check but without much success. We have also booked the holiday of a lifetime and quite possibly the worst time work wise but, hey ho,if I wanted life to be all about work, I'd still be in my last job.

    The negatives are I'm 2lbs back on from my best which is still shown in my sig. I've lost track of how finances stand. It's less than 2 months until the big 50. A friend of OH's arrives next Sunday for a few days and we are in such a mess. Plus, my accountant has been unwell so is only coming this afternoon to start on my tax return. I don't like cutting things so fine!
    Don't even ask about my sugar levels and I have a hospital appointment in 2 weeks. Anyhow, I'm off to do a list that will hopefully sort out the rooms my accountant friend may enter while she is here. If I get through this, it'll hopefully gee me up to get more done before our guest arrives next week.
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £75,268.93, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £247.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.7/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Current weight loss RUBBISH need to refocus
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • mfmaybe
    • By mfmaybe 28th Jan 18, 2:39 PM
    • 1,130 Posts
    • 3,638 Thanks
    mfmaybe
    Take a deep breath INOD. Don't beat yourself up. The past should just stay there. The only really important stuff is the health, really (and maybe the tax return ). And holidays of a lifetime? Well you know my current stance and I say, go for it. Enjoy it.
    BTL Overpayments since 20/4 £30.63

    AFD June 8/15 NSD June 5/11

    Other debts paid since 1/1/14: £17,005
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 28th Jan 18, 5:51 PM
    • 54,919 Posts
    • 219,275 Thanks
    beanielou
    Holiday of a lifetime will bring memories for a lifetime to cherish.

    My weight is all to pot.
    I am fat frumpy & grumpy.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 30th Jan 18, 1:23 PM
    • 1,980 Posts
    • 12,230 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    Perhaps if the coach isn't resonating with you inod maybe it's time to say goodbye.

    Re weight I'm in the same boat - after a flying start I put on 1lb when I weighed in on Monday. I'm afraid this time of year doesn't exactly endear you to watching your food, etc. Perhaps move the New Year to 1st June!

    Focus on your lovely forthcoming holiday.....
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 20/05/2018: £646.59
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 35!
    My diary: ďPaid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!Ē
    • milann
    • By milann 30th Jan 18, 1:58 PM
    • 1,724 Posts
    • 8,065 Thanks
    milann
    I agree focus on the holiday and take everything a step at a time.
    • jwil
    • By jwil 30th Jan 18, 4:43 PM
    • 8,607 Posts
    • 26,515 Thanks
    jwil
    Holiday of a lifetime sounds great! Ouch to new boiler and big spends though.
    "If you can dream it, you can do it". Walt Disney
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 30th Jan 18, 10:13 PM
    • 4,410 Posts
    • 30,555 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    to expensive building work, but sometimes it can't be helped.

    As has already been said maybe a different coach would suit you better, it's a very personal thing.

    The holiday will give you something to look forward to in this miserable January weather, as long as you can find the money for it .
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 7th Feb 18, 1:51 PM
    • 1,767 Posts
    • 10,626 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Hope everything is ok INOD
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 10th Feb 18, 2:06 PM
    • 5,058 Posts
    • 29,373 Thanks
    in need of direction
    so, typically me, when the going gets tough, i disappear into lurkdom and vicarious moneysaving via other people's diaries. since tuesday, i've had the dreaded cold / flu thing that's doing the rounds and have just felt rotten. i did however drag myself out to a meeting on thursday with what has been an elusive client to be told that, although they awarded me a contract in sept, they really don't want the service that they specified. i was so so annoyed, depressed, etc. it was always going to require more effort than it was worth but they should not mess people around like this. i also found out that i was unsuccessful with the part time post applied for and had a check up at the diabetic clinic at the hospital yesterday. the check up went slightly better than expected. my sugars are still too high but the dr was someone who listened and even seemed to believe that i should input into decisions about my health - how unusual!

    on other news, i'm pockling on with SB and PA and am halfway to payout from each. I also emailed my coach and explained how i was feeling. she was great and i'm to pick up with her when i'm ready and on those topics I feel ready to work on. The big issue here is that she is giving her time, input, etc. free of charge so i feel under increased pressure to respond positively to suggestions even when i'm already feeling overwhelmed. she is being really patient with me.

    yesterday i visited Mr L picking up veg and bananas and soup has been made and some consumed. this is something to try and stick with going forward. somedays it's just not feasible but it really is past time that i gave it a go.

    we had one of OH's London based friends to stay for a few days last week. it really highlighted the need to keep on top of house stuff as there had to be the usual mad dash to get stuff done that created pressure and anxiety before he arrived. we will be having a lot more people round and/or staying in March so things really need sorted.
    Moneywise, there has been another small TT and OH just cashed out £20 from PA which is also going to reside in the joint account and may even end up with the mortgage. I can't be the only one worrying about possible mortgage increases can I?
    There is the possibility of me gaining another £250 cashback into my business account but this will require 30 transactions over the next month and i can only envisage 15 or thereabouts. i really need to get my thinking cap on!

    On monday, I managed to offload two bags of stuff to a local charity and i also have things to go to the bay. the issue here is that it is OH's account and it would appear to take him hours to do each listing. is this normal?

    I have decided that we need a new ipad. our very old one crashes so regularly that posting and comping are problematic. i need the discipline of regular posts and i'm down about £50 a year in payouts. I'm meeting two potential clients on Tuesday and have a tender to go in by month end. If I got this, I would have 3 years recurring work that would bring in £5k pa. Fingers crossed for this and I would get a new ipad.

    this post is so disjointed so apologies to anyone trying to plough their way through it. i will go and ready myself for week 2 of the rugby. hopefully my wee team won't leave things as last minute as they did last week. not sure my nerves could stand it!
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £75,268.93, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £247.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.7/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Current weight loss RUBBISH need to refocus
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Feb 18, 2:51 PM
    • 54,919 Posts
    • 219,275 Thanks
    beanielou
    Also worrying about the mortgage rises.
    My fix is due to finish in September.
    I wont get another fix based on affardability.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Feb 18, 2:52 PM
    • 54,919 Posts
    • 219,275 Thanks
    beanielou
    Sorry that that client messed you about.
    I can never understand why people do this
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 10th Feb 18, 2:53 PM
    • 54,919 Posts
    • 219,275 Thanks
    beanielou
    Keep plodding
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • doingitanyway
    • By doingitanyway 10th Feb 18, 5:26 PM
    • 3,147 Posts
    • 15,777 Thanks
    doingitanyway
    Lots going on INOD and client's behaviour is pants frankly. Keep going. You'll get to where you need to be. Take care.
    JANUARY 2016/SECURED DEBT=24,822/March 2018=0 DEBT FREE 23/03/18
    MORTGAGE FREE 25/07/16
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 10th Feb 18, 6:30 PM
    • 1,752 Posts
    • 9,592 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Sympathies over the cold/flu - it's a humdinger of a nasty, isn't it? Sorry to hear about the poor show from the former clients, too, though in the long run you are probably better off without them and it will free up your time for better contracts. Perhaps your Tuesday meeting will be productive and you can focus on that business.

    While your counsellor is being patient with you, I think I hear a guilt trip going on as well! Yes, she's giving her time, but surely being overwhelmed is at the core of all this? So as a good counsellor she will see that there is only so much you can take on at any one time, and will stand back until you are ready for more. So don't feel guilty. This is about you and your position.

    Re: cashback - I went through a phase of getting money out of the till and paying it back through the branch! Quite a faff but it did increase the amount paid into the account! Is there a variation on that which would enable you to have enough transactions?

    Could you set up an account of your own for selling? I know you would take a while to get the positive feedback but unless your OH is happy to give you free rein with his account, that might save a lot of nagging! I'm afraid I'm like him, it takes me forever to list things.
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 11th Feb 18, 11:10 AM
    • 1,980 Posts
    • 12,230 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    Hope youíre feeling a lot better today inod and the lurgy is beginning to fade. And I agree 100% with what Cherry wrote about your counsellor

    How maddening about the client! Iím pleased to hear that your doctor is sympathetic though - it makes such a difference.

    Re the house guests due in March. Perhaps try some flylady crisis cleaning but over the period till they arrive rather than one day! I sympathise about the soup making as well. Sometimes I get in and I feel too washed out to slice even a carrot! Hence the take away fish and chips and detrimental effect on diet!

    Keep positive - youíll get there
    SSG x
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 20/05/2018: £646.59
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 35!
    My diary: ďPaid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!Ē
    • in need of direction
    • By in need of direction 11th Feb 18, 11:17 AM
    • 5,058 Posts
    • 29,373 Thanks
    in need of direction
    Cherry, you're right about the transactions, i just need to find the card and the pin. because i was afraid of overusing my business account when there was a lack of incoming funds, i hid the card and pin separately from myself. still, my office needs a good tidy out anyway.
    I have a friend who owes me money for concert tickets and who has asked for my bank details. i'm gonna give him the business account and then do a transfer to my personal account. that'll be 2 transactions, i just need to keep really good records!
    Today i have 2 work things to get done, ironing, the office and OH and I are going to a 2 hr dance class! I love dancing and he doesn't but we did one class about a month ago and he kinda enjoyed it. We recognise that we both need to move more and, for me, this is possibly the most enjoyable form of exercise. i spoke to Mr Wii this morning and he advises that i have lost 2lbs so i've updated the sig to show 1lb less than previously recorded. i think it was a bit of a fluke down to feeling unwell but i'm going to try and build upon it.
    there's also the usual stuff to get through including roasting various veg for use over the next few days. if i could shift another 4lbs in the next few weeks, i'd be a stone down in 6 months. however, i don't want to crash diet to achieve this as i know i'm just asking for trouble is I do that.
    anyhow, here endeth the whittering and the procrastination, as a well known brand of sports wear would advocate, i need to get on and Just Do It!
    Today I am grateful for
    weightloss
    a text from DS confirming he's safely at the airport to return from Oz
    a common understanding
    Mortgage at 01.01.14 £119,481.83 today £75,268.93, target £65,000 by 31/12/18 Offset fund today £247.27 target £5,500 by 31/12/18
    Emergency fund £0.7/5.5k & £200/200 cash.
    Current weight loss RUBBISH need to refocus
    determined to stop defining myself by my mistakes.
    Progress not perfection.
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