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    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 8th Feb 18, 5:45 PM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    They do just a couple of roads over and there are vacancies as He Who Knows walked up there this morning and chatted to some of the plot holders. The garden is only a fraction of the 6th of an acre we have though and we both wonder if that is just too little for all the jobs like sorting out and storing the wood for the stove etc. needs thinking through!
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • Nargleblast
    • By Nargleblast 8th Feb 18, 8:05 PM
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    Nargleblast
    Mrs LW, it sounds like that house is the one. You will never find the one that is perfect because no such thing exists. That one is near as dammit, you can make the small garden work for you and have an allotment nearby for your fruit and veggies.
    Debt free date.....3 August 2015
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    • ivyleaf
    • By ivyleaf 8th Feb 18, 11:21 PM
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    ivyleaf
    Lyn When you mentioned the small garden I was thinking of allotments too. Good luck making your decision x
    • fuddle
    • By fuddle 9th Feb 18, 7:03 AM
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    fuddle
    Lyn a picture of my yard is coming your way some point today. Not only did DH cut and made the woodstore in the space, he has sanded doors, cut dry wall boards, dismantled large pallets and chopped logs we have been lucky to source from a tree felling and he maintains his fishing kit in it. I know you store much more wood than we ever could but in terms of space needed to work in, HWKs will have more spacial awareness than my DH and if he can manage HWKs can

    I think I'm just willing you to find your home and I would hate to see you pass a lovely one by because it didn't have outdoor space like on the wishlist.
    • kittie
    • By kittie 9th Feb 18, 9:06 AM
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    kittie
    I have been having a serious long think this morning, about mrsLW and about me and our house hunting. We were born under exactly the same star so have many things in common. I have gardening deep in my veins and psyche. This what I worked out for myself:

    For 30 happy years we had a plot of .25 of an acre and I grew almost all our veg and various fruits. That house was in the wrong orientation ie the inside was cold and not sunny, we downsized, again the psyche of it, get older and downsize before it is too late. The upside was that we got rid of very much stuff and we went to a townhouse new build on an estate linked to a manor house, painted ceilings in the manor, communal rooms and 43 shared acres of parkland. Our only garden was a very small exposed patio. We stayed 4 years,the group bought the freehold, self managed and dh was so stressed because believe me there are not nice people out there, never do any work and moan. So we moved here, having liked the new build aspect. When the allotment was mentioned, we jumped at the chance. Eco house, s facing, solar shading, bells and whistles and an allotment, village. What could be better? Things changed, truly this was his house, the one he chose and kept asking me if I liked it, yes I said

    Now it is my turn and I have just realised that honestly at the very top of my list is plot size orientation and garden. I can kid myself, bells and whistles, insulation, never as important as the garden to me. So I could change a house, add a sunroom/conservatory, add a workshop in a log cabin. Allotments are good, of course they are but like the town house community, there are always one or two who spoil things. As mrsLW and I know, it is not being surrounded by roses and sitting under an arch. It is about a life, living outdoors, building a pond, making a veg plot, growing fruit trees. Picking fresh veg in our dressing gowns

    I am also aware that with all the development plans and the influx of new houses, that any view behind or in front is not guaranteed for a lifetime, so a tiny garden will always be at risk of being surrounded by breeze blocks and mortar
    Last edited by kittie; 09-02-2018 at 9:12 AM.
    • juliettet
    • By juliettet 9th Feb 18, 9:54 AM
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    juliettet
    Mrs LW. Go and have another look at Topsy Turvy. Remember the vertical gardening website. I'm sure ideas can be incorporated there. Hope you and Kittie get something soon.
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 9th Feb 18, 9:59 AM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    On the nose Kittie, it's not rose gardens but veg patches and log piles that make us tick individually and as a couple, it's who we are! I don't hanker for views I value peace and quiet inside and out of both the house and me! my idea of absolute hell would be an 'over 55s' enclave where it was all lace curtains and cut crystal vases and pretention over who had the best far flung holidays last year, listening to 'cruise' talk and being shown evening dresses! My heaven would be a detached house set square in the middle of it's own good sized garden with a small orchard and lots of vegetable growing space, enough room for the greenhouse and polytunnel and some decent brick built outhouses for storage. An outside loo for the gardeners would be wonderful too. The house only has to have enough rooms and good solid washable floors, I can't abide carpets, the rest is immaterial as anything we don't like can be removed, replaced and dealt with.

    I'm aware of the siren voices saying 'this is the best you've seen, don't lose it' but also that small voice that says 'this isn't exactly what you want, wait on and it will come'.

    I think something as important as the 'rest of our lives' home MUST be the right one and desperate as I am to get the move over and be more involved with the family I'm not in so much of a hurry that I'll knowingly settle for something that doesn't match up to our wants and needs. Being a Capricorn isn't an easy life is it honey? xxx.
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • kittie
    • By kittie 9th Feb 18, 10:33 AM
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    kittie
    That is it mrsLW, I too will wait, it will happen. I know I came here to make my husband happy, I was swept away by the idyll of the allotment, skylarks, eco but then again things are meant to be and he loved this place. I had that niggle but I ignored it, met the lovely neighbour on viewing and that sealed it.

    I don`t care about my age, I have more get up and go than many 50 year olds so nothing but nothing can stand in the way of me coping with a large garden. Ok yes I might have to get landscapers in to get rid of old neglected overgrown bushes, cut trees back and I would get help to prepare raised veg beds, I need a quick start at my age
    • fuddle
    • By fuddle 9th Feb 18, 10:46 AM
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    fuddle
    But ladies remember there are people on this thread and lurking who don't have choice. Those of us who manage, manage with what we've got. The decisions we can make are about cost and maintenance without a lot of money. What you're describing is very much a need based on what you're used to. That is perfectly ok but what so many of us want is very far from the reality of what we can achieve.

    Now you know me well enough to know that I come from a good place and I am going to say this whether you both like it or not Lyn and kittie. Large outdoor spaces require fitness and health. Please don't lumber yourselves with outdoor spaces that you might not be able to maintain as you edge further into your retirement. There said it.

    I know you know yourselves very well and you're sensible people and that really you don't need me to point it out but I do feel that, while you are frustrated at not finding what you want, many of us have to make decisions that we don't want. Bare in mind, amongst your frustration, that you've made the right decisions through life and it's your investments that enable you to have this choice. Don't be letting the luxury of having that choice be the bain of your lives, altering mind and mood. You're lucky ladies. Run with it (but don't bug your older years down with lots of land to tend) ok, I can feel the stares. I'll shush!
    • DawnW
    • By DawnW 9th Feb 18, 10:49 AM
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    DawnW
    I agree Mrs L and Kittie, wait till you find something that is exactly what you want. But I also identify with Fuddle's view. We had to buy our house in a bit of a hurry, and although I like it, it is not my ideal. I don't think we could afford to move now, so make the best of it (terraced cottage, small garden, on edge of town on a through road, a certain amount of antisocial behaviour, litter etc, on the part of passers by, not lovely neighbours). I would love a bigger garden etc but am conscious that I can manage what we have perfectly well on my own if need be (and OH slipped a disc before Christmas, so I have had to). And we are lucky, to own a house outright, no mortgage etc, and that enabled both of us to retire earlier than the state would have sanctioned.
    Last edited by DawnW; 09-02-2018 at 10:54 AM.
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    • kittie
    • By kittie 9th Feb 18, 11:18 AM
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    kittie
    Fuddle I do agree with you and I know where you are coming from and I am not giving you daggers, honest.

    Dawn I can very much see where you are coming from, having been brought up from a small very old tatty terraced with a yard but a brilliant community, in liverpool. That was at that end of my life, my young end and now at the other end, I am going for big garden, not talking .25 acres but just big garden, husband had friends in their 80s who cycled and that is me (hopefully) so I can see that I have 10+ active years in me and I aint going to waste them.

    So yes I started looking from a different angle this morning. In my preferred area, a house that I bi-passed at first sight, flagstone floors, very old dark beams, big enough garden but then I see the well, so there is a stream underneath and then I see the ongoing house maintenance and dark rooms and I think of my friend in a similar cottage, she has winter sad and gets very low. The stream below, bad feng shui. So you see the garden is top of the list but has to be qualified by a suitable house.

    I am lucky to have a choice, I know it, my mother would have loved to have had a choice and she will be rooting for me
    • monnagran
    • By monnagran 9th Feb 18, 12:15 PM
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    monnagran
    I'm barging in again.

    I can see both points of view. I am also looking for my 'end of life' home. Doesn't that sound dreary?

    In my time I have owned a huge house in a big garden, a tiny listed cottage with 4x1/2 acres, my own woods and views to die for, I've then lived in three large Victorian houses with three large gardens that looked as though they hadn't seen a spade since Victoria passed away. And in each I created a garden.
    Now I am looking for a modern, easily managed bungalow with a small level garden. I'm not ecstatic at the thought. I've always lived in interesting houses, but interesting involves a lot of work. Next year I will be 80 and already I cannot garden as I used to, I am very careful going up and down stairs and absolutely everything that happens in my home has to be done by me and me alone.
    So, my next move will, hopefully, be my last.
    I have moved, or helped to move, several 90 year-olds from a home they have lived in far too long and in each case it has been a nightmare for the person and their family. I will not inflict that scenario on my family. Hence I am wearing my brand new sensible hat and doing what I know to be the right thing, even though it is far from what I am used to.

    Of course, I have to sell my beautiful 4 bedroomed, barn conversion, home by the sea first. No problem, you may think. Think again and take in the electricity sub-station attached to the garage wall. See the potential buyers pick up their skirts and take to the hills.
    Last edited by monnagran; 09-02-2018 at 12:19 PM.
    I believe that friends are quiet angels
    Who lift us to our feet when our wings
    Have trouble remembering how to fly.
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 9th Feb 18, 1:36 PM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    I hear you FUDS, and you are right in saying that we could both of us manage with far less than we think we want, that's why I'm not listening to the siren voices at either end of my wants/compromises list. I could so easily talk us in to buying this because it's the best we've seen but the voice at the other end is saying 'you know yourselves well enough that maybe it seems a good idea today BUT will you still feel that after the gloss of newness has worn off?' My middle thoughts are saying it IS a compromise and you'll be gaining things as well as losing them. I would be able to walk straight to the high street of a lovely little town via a conveniently placed footpath, BUT I'd be on a much less frequent bus service if I wanted to go to the city. Here it's one every half hour in either direction and it would be difficult to go to one every other hour in either direction. I'm listening to the voice that says don't go and buy a house just because it's got the biggest garden you've ever seen but I'm wary of that voice saying you can manage with a pocket handkerchief and you'll make it work. I'm listening to the voice saying you'd hate neighbours that close but not to the one saying you'll get used to it. It's a difficult decision on all levels and I do so take your message of making what you can afford work and being happy while you're doing it so I'm listening to you too! thank you for being the brakes and also the pusher, I'm lucky that we do have choice and I'm petrified of getting it wrong xxx.
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • fuddle
    • By fuddle 9th Feb 18, 3:02 PM
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    fuddle
    You're tormented. I sense it. I don't like it Lyn

    I don't also appreciate monna saying the word sensible.

    Kittie you're under so much pressure and also with Feng Shui. I order you to enjoy this process. It's a must!

    Aging. It's a boogar!
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 9th Feb 18, 3:15 PM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    Not tormented poppet more like demented!!! We're Ok I'm just not very good at idling along waiting for things to happen, I like organised and quick and onwards to the future and I feel a bit in limbo at the moment, it's good for my soul (yes I do have one despite all appearances to the contrary) to have to wait though isn't it?

    MONNA wash your mouth girl, sensible......phewee pish!!!
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • kittie
    • By kittie 9th Feb 18, 3:21 PM
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    kittie
    I too feel tormented, a good way to describe current feelings fuddle and monna, what you said, that was such a reality check re the type of home. In the past in prepping, we have spoken about planning ahead, or maybe it was an over 50s thread but it was often mentioned, either a bungalow or a house with potential for washing facilities and a bedroom downstairs if needed, so I will be going back to those basics.

    I was starting to love the idea of quirky and old but to be realistic, I am now thinking of 70s/80s to get enough garden. Often characterless houses with thin internal walls but possible to re-configure if the price is right.

    I saw a special terraced house yesterday on RM, an ideal small medieval location but overhanging a narrow high street, no front parking, spaces at the back. Garden up and further up in tiers and layers, lots of wooden decking areas that looked ready to rot. Internals that were to die for, wood everywhere, old old wood, an aga, low ceilings and dark beams and what character but sigh, not for me. I even drove past it, down the very narrow street. Listed for future generations

    The upside to all this upset is to be getting mentally sorted, before the spring rush
    Last edited by kittie; 09-02-2018 at 3:25 PM.
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 9th Feb 18, 3:39 PM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    I just want a big enough house to be comfortable in, a loo on each floor, either a woodstove in place or the open fireplace there to let us install one and enough garden to have some veg at home, the tender ones that need all the attention, watering and TLC. He Who Knows wants a shop for everyday things like bread, milk, papers etc. within walking distance and busses within easy reach. It doesn't seem greedy as a wish list but the garden is the most important part, not a huge one but not a tiny one either. Somewhere there is the house that will do, we just have to find it.
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • zeupater
    • By zeupater 9th Feb 18, 4:07 PM
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    zeupater
    I just want a big enough house to be comfortable in, a loo on each floor, either a woodstove in place or the open fireplace there to let us install one and enough garden to have some veg at home, the tender ones that need all the attention, watering and TLC. He Who Knows wants a shop for everyday things like bread, milk, papers etc. within walking distance and busses within easy reach. It doesn't seem greedy as a wish list but the garden is the most important part, not a huge one but not a tiny one either. Somewhere there is the house that will do, we just have to find it.
    Originally posted by MrsLurcherwalker
    Hi

    Been thinking about a number of recent posts and thought of some input ...

    We have a pretty large garden with a veg patch (not far from the size of an allotment!) & greenhouse down in one corner. A few years ago we went through a phase of growing much more produce than we do now, but most of the space and hard-work went into bulk veg that was readily available from local (trusted) sources, so we simply changed to concentrate on the 'luxury'/'expensive' things which would make a difference ... we still grow potatoes, carrots, onions etc, but not rows & rows of them, but there's far more herbs, garlic, tomatoes, peppers etc & the garden's now filled with various fruits ... effectively a move from 'bulk' to 'flavour', it's far easier & much more satisfying! ...

    Also, don't forget the borders, they can be quite interesting when incorporating fruit & veg into the scheme!

    HTH
    Z
    "We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit. " ...... Aristotle
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 9th Feb 18, 4:15 PM
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    MrsLurcherwalker
    Hi Zeupater, we've gradually been slowing down with what we grow over the years and deciding that some things have priority over others. We've always had allotments since we first met, even before we got married we had an allotment! We both like the pottering, He Who Knows is really an outdoors person and my concern with a tiny patch is that he will feel 'cabined, cribbed, confined' without his refuge of a decent garden shed and workshop to go to when he hasn't anything jobwise elsewhere. It's not a mancave but he does like to potter, chopping kindling, potting up seedlings, etc. and I'd so hate for him not to have that available. We don't do flowers other than the odd row of sweet Williams or helichrysums on the allotment for picking for the house. All our borders are full of strawberries, fruit trees and an asparagus bed, it's such a good way of life I'm loath to give it up. Having said that we could cope with double cropping in a smaller garden if only we could find one not too small.
    Thumpers mum was right - if you can't find anything nice to say don't say anything at all!
    • monnagran
    • By monnagran 9th Feb 18, 5:14 PM
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    monnagran
    Lyn, I am inclined to encourage you to follow your heart. OK, you may find that at some stage along the way your garden may be too much to manage, but you are young enough to get many more years of happiness and fulfilment from your lifestyle. I have in mind my own father who was one of the 90 year-olds I referred to as moving into a bungalow after a lifetime of cultivating a 1 acre of garden. In his new small garden we installed a heated greenhouse and he contentedly grew all his own vegetables and his show crysanthemums for another 5 years.
    If you have another 20 years in your new home it has to be right for you and HWK. Take your time, the house for you is out there somewhere.
    For me, I am about 10 years older than you and completely on my own so I do need to prepare for the rest of my life in those circumstances.

    Fuddle, 'sensible' is my middle name. Didn't you know that?
    Last edited by monnagran; 09-02-2018 at 5:17 PM.
    I believe that friends are quiet angels
    Who lift us to our feet when our wings
    Have trouble remembering how to fly.
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