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  • FIRST POST
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 8th Mar 15, 11:07 PM
    • 6,085Posts
    • 32,227Thanks
    AlexLK
    Renovations and Repayments.
    • #1
    • 8th Mar 15, 11:07 PM
    Renovations and Repayments. 8th Mar 15 at 11:07 PM
    Hello and welcome to visitors familiar with my journey thus far and are surprised to see me on such a sensible board and a further warm welcome to the new faces wondering what they've let themselves in for.

    Let me begin by clarifying a few points: the first one is I am not sure whether I'm actually serious or not about clearing my mortgage and the second is the fact my house needs quite a bit of work doing to it. This work I do myself and in the time my wife and I have lived in the house we've learnt all kinds of new skills. The current project involves renewing the windows and I am making the frames myself, two are done and I'm pleased to say look great.

    I plan to use this mortgage free (how very grown up) diary to document the renovations and my savings activities, out of which overpayments may or may not be made. However, I am fully committed to long term saving and making as much money as possible. A long term goal of mine is to add to the BTL portfolio I shall one day inherit and am already becoming more involved in which is perhaps a good reason to pay my mortgage off and make my current property into an investment.

    Aside from the recent interest in moneysaving I have a four year old son, run my own company, play and teach the violin and piano whilst studying for my own interest. Oh and don't mention the cars.

    Those familiar with my debt-free diary will know I'm not exactly great at record keeping but am trying to improve, so please don't expect the detailed financial updates others seem to put on here. To kick things off, I suppose I ought to confess the mortgage debt is a total of circa £185,000 and I have no real timescale or plan in mind to pay it off.

    Sorry if this is not a particularly articulate introduction, as I seem to be at a loss how to tailor it to both those who've read my debt free diary and to new readers frequenting mortgage free.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
Page 166
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 20th Oct 17, 11:14 AM
    • 6,085 Posts
    • 32,227 Thanks
    AlexLK
    I have today and the coming week off but am not sure whether I will be going back. I!!!8217;m not doing very well in observations or tasks set. At the moment I!!!8217;ve no intention to apply for a teaching job and have potential work in property lined up with an old school friend. If nothing else it has given me the confidence to know I can do full time work without it bringing undue stress and to make the most of the connections and knowledge I do have. Upon reflection, teaching has also made me realise it wasn!!!8217;t the work which was a problem but the culture of an organisation (and profession) which contributed to making me ill.

    On a different note, we are keeping good records of our finances and I!!!8217;m starting to get some real advice about my business / family finances for the future rather than just playing at it. I suppose it!!!8217;s really starting to sink in that my parents aren!!!8217;t going to be here forever and there!!!8217;s a potential for some of their last years to render them not really the people they were.
    Last edited by AlexLK; 20-10-2017 at 11:23 AM.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
    • kelpie35
    • By kelpie35 20th Oct 17, 2:58 PM
    • 1,551 Posts
    • 5,019 Thanks
    kelpie35
    So pleased to see you back Alex.

    Sorry to hear that the teaching has not gone too well for you.

    I do understand what you mean by the "culture and profession"

    You know your own mind now and the things that work best for you.

    Enjoy your time off and take care of yourself and your family.
    • slowlyfading
    • By slowlyfading 20th Oct 17, 9:33 PM
    • 12,928 Posts
    • 74,233 Thanks
    slowlyfading
    I think if you feel like that, then you probably shouldn't continue.

    As someone who works in secondary teaching, you have to love the job you do. Yes, the days are long, difficult, frustrating, demanding and a host of other things, but something in there has to make you want to be there.

    It's the little things, like a Year 7 thanking you for your lesson, to a grumpy Year 9 boy suddenly getting something he didn't understand before. It's your GCSE class having a laugh on an afternoon over something really daft. It's the things children come out with that they don't realise are funny but are actually hilarious. It's about making connections, helping them through the tricky stages and enjoying the fact that you work with wonderful young people.

    If you don't feel that, then teaching isn't for you. And I'm saying that in the kindest way possible.
    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind - Dr Seuss
    Personal Finance Blogger / June NSD - 9 / Ultimate Dream Fund - £25,646.36/£306,000
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 20th Oct 17, 11:59 PM
    • 6,085 Posts
    • 32,227 Thanks
    AlexLK
    So pleased to see you back Alex.

    Sorry to hear that the teaching has not gone too well for you.

    I do understand what you mean by the "culture and profession"

    You know your own mind now and the things that work best for you.

    Enjoy your time off and take care of yourself and your family.
    Originally posted by kelpie35
    Thank you, kelpie.

    Nothing to be sorry about. Whilst I've not been having the best time, I have gained some knowledge and insight. I've been able to step back and think things through rationally rather than overwhelming myself with stress. I know if I choose not to go back it doesn't make me a failure, rather I tried something I wanted to try and it wasn't meant to be. I don't really know what's happened but it's like I've flicked a switch in my mind.

    Going to try to enjoy the coming week as much as possible and get out to a few places with my son. However, my father was meant to come out of hospital today and he hasn't, so the coming week is looking mostly like entertaining my mother and helping father.

    I think if you feel like that, then you probably shouldn't continue.

    As someone who works in secondary teaching, you have to love the job you do. Yes, the days are long, difficult, frustrating, demanding and a host of other things, but something in there has to make you want to be there.

    It's the little things, like a Year 7 thanking you for your lesson, to a grumpy Year 9 boy suddenly getting something he didn't understand before. It's your GCSE class having a laugh on an afternoon over something really daft. It's the things children come out with that they don't realise are funny but are actually hilarious. It's about making connections, helping them through the tricky stages and enjoying the fact that you work with wonderful young people.

    If you don't feel that, then teaching isn't for you. And I'm saying that in the kindest way possible.
    Originally posted by slowlyfading
    That's the conclusion I'm arriving at, SF.

    In my volunteering work / music teaching I've felt it and also really love being a parent. However, I'm not passionate about the things I am teaching and have formed no sort of bond with any of the pupils. I still teach a few pupils Music and go above and beyond for them as they are dedicated, passionate and open to learning. Some I've let go in the past because they are not. In a classroom situation I don't have that control to teach the pupils I wish to teach. My main problem lies with staff and the culture, though. It almost seems unreasonable to have other commitments. I didn't attend one staff meeting (they didn't care about my opinion but apparently did about my presence) because I needed to meet with a tenant resulted in a meeting with the Head that week. The day after, a particular member of staff with a taste for trouble decided to try to alienate me from everyone else. I spoke to the school direct person to be told I need to attend staff meetings regardless and that I am not making it easy for staff to like me. In the time I've been there, I've done everything asked of me other than the one staff meeting and offered to help with all music related things but that isn't good enough because apparently having property to deal with = not making it easy for staff to like you.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
    • smallholdingsister
    • By smallholdingsister 21st Oct 17, 5:34 AM
    • 3,591 Posts
    • 30,145 Thanks
    smallholdingsister
    I think if you feel like that, then you probably shouldn't continue.

    As someone who works in secondary teaching, you have to love the job you do. Yes, the days are long, difficult, frustrating, demanding and a host of other things, but something in there has to make you want to be there.

    It's the little things, like a Year 7 thanking you for your lesson, to a grumpy Year 9 boy suddenly getting something he didn't understand before. It's your GCSE class having a laugh on an afternoon over something really daft. It's the things children come out with that they don't realise are funny but are actually hilarious. It's about making connections, helping them through the tricky stages and enjoying the fact that you work with wonderful young people.

    If you don't feel that, then teaching isn't for you. And I'm saying that in the kindest way possible.
    Originally posted by slowlyfading
    Epic post. Yesterday it was hysterics over hairy carrots.
    • Red-Squirrel
    • By Red-Squirrel 21st Oct 17, 9:52 AM
    • 2,780 Posts
    • 7,421 Thanks
    Red-Squirrel

    In my volunteering work / music teaching I've felt it and also really love being a parent. However, I'm not passionate about the things I am teaching and have formed no sort of bond with any of the pupils. I still teach a few pupils Music and go above and beyond for them as they are dedicated, passionate and open to learning. Some I've let go in the past because they are not. In a classroom situation I don't have that control to teach the pupils I wish to teach. My main problem lies with staff and the culture, though. It almost seems unreasonable to have other commitments. I didn't attend one staff meeting (they didn't care about my opinion but apparently did about my presence) because I needed to meet with a tenant resulted in a meeting with the Head that week. The day after, a particular member of staff with a taste for trouble decided to try to alienate me from everyone else. I spoke to the school direct person to be told I need to attend staff meetings regardless and that I am not making it easy for staff to like me. In the time I've been there, I've done everything asked of me other than the one staff meeting and offered to help with all music related things but that isn't good enough because apparently having property to deal with = not making it easy for staff to like you.
    Originally posted by AlexLK
    Did you speak to anybody about the fact that you couldn't attend the staff meeting beforehand? Did you try to rearrange the meeting with the tenant or was it urgent?

    I hope you didn't just not turn up and when asked about it dismiss it with 'I have properties to deal with'. Do you realise how that can come across? For one thing, a staff meeting isn't just a chance for you to give your opinion, its a chance to hear other people and to get new information that affects you, your pupils and the school, you've now let them know that doesn't matter to you.

    If you did pre-arrange with someone more senior or with your mentor/supervisor that you couldn't attend and it was agreed that it was ok for you to skip one, that's different.

    It does sound like working in a school is not going to be for you though, and that's fine, it is what it is and you are who you are! If teachers only taught children who wanted to learn and were enthusiastic about school though, how many children with the potential to grow into hard working, decent, productive adults would get left behind? If you don't want to be the one to try and help them, that's fine, its not something everybody can do, but please have a little respect for those that dedicate their working lives to it.

    Maybe you could look at a way to formalise your music tuition and turn that into more of a small business? It sounds like it suits you much better.
    Last edited by Red-Squirrel; 21-10-2017 at 10:01 AM.
    • smallholdingsister
    • By smallholdingsister 21st Oct 17, 10:59 AM
    • 3,591 Posts
    • 30,145 Thanks
    smallholdingsister
    However you view staff meetings they should be a priority.

    In my experience the most negative way in which other teachers will view you is with indifference. We are simply too busy to get mixed up in other peoples' stuff.
    • slowlyfading
    • By slowlyfading 21st Oct 17, 9:38 PM
    • 12,928 Posts
    • 74,233 Thanks
    slowlyfading
    My main problem lies with staff and the culture, though. It almost seems unreasonable to have other commitments. I didn't attend one staff meeting (they didn't care about my opinion but apparently did about my presence) because I needed to meet with a tenant resulted in a meeting with the Head that week. The day after, a particular member of staff with a taste for trouble decided to try to alienate me from everyone else. I spoke to the school direct person to be told I need to attend staff meetings regardless and that I am not making it easy for staff to like me. In the time I've been there, I've done everything asked of me other than the one staff meeting and offered to help with all music related things but that isn't good enough because apparently having property to deal with = not making it easy for staff to like you.
    Originally posted by AlexLK
    During term time, it is expected that you are there during school hours, regardless. Other commitments need to be arranged at a different time. Did you say to anyone beforehand that you weren't going to the staff meeting? Things like that are directed time, so you shouldn't miss them apart from in an emergency. Meeting with a tenant doesn't fall in this category, at all.

    Other members of staff will have other commitments, perhaps property like you, but it's the way you deal with it that matters. When you're in the school, what matters is providing the best opportunities for the young people in front of you. Not disappearing because a tenant needs to speak to you. There are many hours outside of the school day, meetings included, which you could have met them in or spoken to them on the phone in the first instance.

    You say you've done everything that has been asked of you - that's the norm surely? You're on your training and you need to do everything by the book. You are there to make a good impression as these are the people who write your references and who, if you want one, will provide support in getting your first job. I do everything I'm asked to as well, even though some things I might not personally agree with, because when I signed the contract for my current post, that's what I agree to do. Including the mountains of paper work!

    It does sound as if teaching as a profession is not for you. That's not a bad thing, just make the decision sooner rather than later. For both your sake and where you are doing your placement.
    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind - Dr Seuss
    Personal Finance Blogger / June NSD - 9 / Ultimate Dream Fund - £25,646.36/£306,000
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 21st Oct 17, 11:47 PM
    • 6,085 Posts
    • 32,227 Thanks
    AlexLK
    Epic post. Yesterday it was hysterics over hairy carrots.
    Originally posted by smallholdingsister
    Hairy carrots?

    Did you speak to anybody about the fact that you couldn't attend the staff meeting beforehand? Did you try to rearrange the meeting with the tenant or was it urgent?

    I hope you didn't just not turn up and when asked about it dismiss it with 'I have properties to deal with'. Do you realise how that can come across? For one thing, a staff meeting isn't just a chance for you to give your opinion, its a chance to hear other people and to get new information that affects you, your pupils and the school, you've now let them know that doesn't matter to you.

    If you did pre-arrange with someone more senior or with your mentor/supervisor that you couldn't attend and it was agreed that it was ok for you to skip one, that's different.

    It does sound like working in a school is not going to be for you though, and that's fine, it is what it is and you are who you are! If teachers only taught children who wanted to learn and were enthusiastic about school though, how many children with the potential to grow into hard working, decent, productive adults would get left behind? If you don't want to be the one to try and help them, that's fine, its not something everybody can do, but please have a little respect for those that dedicate their working lives to it.

    Maybe you could look at a way to formalise your music tuition and turn that into more of a small business? It sounds like it suits you much better.
    Originally posted by Red-Squirrel
    Red Squirrel, I have let people down re. teaching. I thought I had found a career path which would suit but I was ignoring some of the realities. When volunteering I didn't mind some of the more challenging pupils because they didn't view me as a teacher. I hadn't anticipated how different it would be with the challenging pupils as their everyday teacher. All the problems teachers had with those pupils and I didn't, I now have and I can't really cope with it.

    I also hadn't anticipated the day being so regimented it's practically impossible to extend Maths for 15 / 30 minutes to allow either for time lost or because extra time would be beneficial. At times it almost seems that routine seems more important than learning. Had everything else been right for me, I wouldn't be so concerned with the conditions of the job but it isn't and I've really started to question why I've not been putting my efforts into areas which would see much greater financial gains.

    To the staff at the school it seems anything to do with my life comes across in a way that offends them. I tell them about my son's upcoming birthday party to have a member of staff roll her eyes at me and be told "well, we just knew you wouldn't be having a pool party at the local leisure centre". I take in a video of my father's live steam garden railway and some nice old clockwork locos to show an interested pupil which was met with scorn.

    However you view staff meetings they should be a priority.

    In my experience the most negative way in which other teachers will view you is with indifference. We are simply too busy to get mixed up in other peoples' stuff.
    Originally posted by smallholdingsister
    Everyone in the school is indeed busy but they seem to have time for gossip at lunchtime (called "dinnertime" ) at this school.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 22nd Oct 17, 12:04 AM
    • 6,085 Posts
    • 32,227 Thanks
    AlexLK
    During term time, it is expected that you are there during school hours, regardless. Other commitments need to be arranged at a different time. Did you say to anyone beforehand that you weren't going to the staff meeting? Things like that are directed time, so you shouldn't miss them apart from in an emergency. Meeting with a tenant doesn't fall in this category, at all.

    Other members of staff will have other commitments, perhaps property like you, but it's the way you deal with it that matters. When you're in the school, what matters is providing the best opportunities for the young people in front of you. Not disappearing because a tenant needs to speak to you. There are many hours outside of the school day, meetings included, which you could have met them in or spoken to them on the phone in the first instance.

    You say you've done everything that has been asked of you - that's the norm surely? You're on your training and you need to do everything by the book. You are there to make a good impression as these are the people who write your references and who, if you want one, will provide support in getting your first job. I do everything I'm asked to as well, even though some things I might not personally agree with, because when I signed the contract for my current post, that's what I agree to do. Including the mountains of paper work!

    It does sound as if teaching as a profession is not for you. That's not a bad thing, just make the decision sooner rather than later. For both your sake and where you are doing your placement.
    Originally posted by slowlyfading
    I fail to see how not attending a staff meeting means I am failing to provide opportunities for pupils? On another point, I am not a paid member of staff. In fact, as a student, if I do go back after half term I will be paying to be there. Therefore, I would argue the same rules cannot apply. Further, the terms by which I signed to as a student has no such clauses pertaining to the definition of directed hours.

    Whilst I won't go into the full details of why I needed to see the tenant, finding a time was difficult due to the tenant's working hours and had another time worked, I would have been at the meeting.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
    • AlexLK
    • By AlexLK 22nd Oct 17, 12:14 AM
    • 6,085 Posts
    • 32,227 Thanks
    AlexLK
    Due to the terrible weather, my wife and I have managed to do a little decluttering at the house and identify some items which ought to find a home. Should hopefully bring a little extra money into our savings too.

    I think we are going to be living with my parents for a time and need to think if this is the best option going forward.
    2018 totals:
    Savings £7,600
    Mortgage Overpayments £1,750
    • Suffolk lass
    • By Suffolk lass 22nd Oct 17, 8:21 AM
    • 2,013 Posts
    • 20,893 Thanks
    Suffolk lass
    Alex, my husband has just started his half-term week and boy, does he need it! This is the longest term of the year and crucial for his students to learn the bedrock of what they need for their GCSEs and A' Levels. I've just had a re-read of the last page of your diary to see if I had missed your decision and I don't think you have written it down.

    You are fortunate that if you close this door, and that is your decision, you have other options and other doors in front of you.

    You also have your music qualifications that mean you are qualified to a level to teach that as a volunteer or privately, outside school.

    I am with Daisy and would try and suck it up to do the training year and the QTS year and then I would look to teach as a part time specialist peripatetic music teacher, going in for a day in several schools, or in the private sector.

    While you are off, reflect in other people's shoes a bit - it will help you with your decision and allow you to see whether you have burned the bridges with colleagues or whether they (the bridges, not the staff ) are smouldering. Perhaps be a little reticent about what you offer of yourself and your opinions and background - you are older (and more opinionated) than a lot of primary teachers and I suspect their hackles are up because you question and challenge things that younger student teachers will accept as wisdom. Or they may just be judgemental and not very nice people.

    Have a good week off and one last thing - look for somewhere else to stay while that kitchen is being done, if you cannot "camp" at home. We camped out at home but had to eat out and at friends' houses for all but breakfast but we always slept at home. It means you can clear all the inevitable pink dust every day. The danger if you don't is it gets into everything and wrecks it.
    MFiT T4 #2 update 88.72% after Q9 tiny bit ahead of where I should be
    Save £12k in 2018 #53 - after May 45.81% £4,581.38/£10,000
    OS Grocery Challenge 2018 spent £1,021.80/£3,000 including stores so far 34.06% of my annual budget at the end of May
    My DFD is here
    • newgirly
    • By newgirly 22nd Oct 17, 9:53 AM
    • 6,326 Posts
    • 43,772 Thanks
    newgirly
    Morning Alex, I've been reading through the last few days but have held back from posting as the only thing I know about teaching is from the perspective of being a student many years ago, and as a parent who always had a huge amount of respect for how on earth people commit to spending their working lives looking after and educating other peoples kids and dealing with their often ungrateful parents, it's something I couldn't do!

    I'm sorry it's not been what you expected, often you build a picture in your mind whilst plannng for the things and its often quite different from the reality. I'm surprised you are questioning why you are not "putting your efforts into areas which would see much greater financial gains" as you originally said it was about doing something worthwhile rather than for just money.I am not trying to be unkind, but I do feel like you may have not made the most of the chance to get along with your colleagues. Don't get me wrong, they may be a total bunch of (fill in he bleeps here!).

    You shouldn't have to hide who you are, but a bit of discretion goes a long way. Do they need to know you have a string of properties and your parents are very wealthy? (Big clue perhaps having a train in the garden )

    I'm not sure I'm putting this down very well, so I guess I'm trying to say do you have respect for the people you are working with and does that come across to them? If not it's going to be impossible to build the working relationships and support that you need, that in turn is going to make the whole situation more unpleasant for you.

    Knowing nothing about the realities of training to be a teacher, or how well you are coping with it. Based solely on what I've read in your diary over the last however long, I would keep at it a bit longer and perhaps give it until Xmas.

    You spent so long questioning whether you could /should go for it, you have barely given yourself time to bed in and adjust, and its a MASSIVE adjustment from your life before. That being said, (this is the bit I'm most worried about saying!) I think you should question your own attitude the whole experience, I think you need to be more sensitive to how other people live and how you may come across.

    Perhaps it's not for you which is fine but it could be a good learning curve. I would love if you went back and gave it another go and challenged yourself to change people's perception of you. You are a great guy, you clearly care about learning or you wouldn't have given so much of your own time up to help others. Perhaps you should see persuading the ones who don't want to learn as the ultimate challenge? That's the place where I would have thought you will make the most difference to kids lives. Some of the best teachers I had did not teach subjects I was interested in, they were brilliant at reeling you in though

    I hope you come to a decision that you will be happy with both now and in the future, all the best
    MFW 21
    Target for 2018 £40k/£13,632 paid so far

    Mortgage £36,319 4yrs left. Total owed £48,358 plan to clear in 14 months
    • Red-Squirrel
    • By Red-Squirrel 22nd Oct 17, 9:59 AM
    • 2,780 Posts
    • 7,421 Thanks
    Red-Squirrel
    Hairy carrots?



    Red Squirrel, I have let people down re. teaching. I thought I had found a career path which would suit but I was ignoring some of the realities. When volunteering I didn't mind some of the more challenging pupils because they didn't view me as a teacher. I hadn't anticipated how different it would be with the challenging pupils as their everyday teacher. All the problems teachers had with those pupils and I didn't, I now have and I can't really cope with it.
    Originally posted by AlexLK
    This is honest and realistic, and there is a bit of self reflection here.

    I also hadn't anticipated the day being so regimented it's practically impossible to extend Maths for 15 / 30 minutes to allow either for time lost or because extra time would be beneficial. At times it almost seems that routine seems more important than learning.
    This is not at all realistic. A school with hundreds of children and staff needs a routine or it will fall into chaos. There are only so many hours in the school day and adding a random 15/30 minutes onto one lesson would cause chaos for other lessons and teachers, surely you can see that?

    Had everything else been right for me, I wouldn't be so concerned with the conditions of the job but it isn't and I've really started to question why I've not been putting my efforts into areas which would see much greater financial gains.
    Financial gain isn't everything, you wanted to try something that you hoped would give you greater job satisfaction, more meaning and a feeling of having contributed to society. All those things are just as important as making money. It hasn't worked, but that doesn't mean it was wrong to try it.

    To the staff at the school it seems anything to do with my life comes across in a way that offends them. I tell them about my son's upcoming birthday party to have a member of staff roll her eyes at me and be told "well, we just knew you wouldn't be having a pool party at the local leisure centre". I take in a video of my father's live steam garden railway and some nice old clockwork locos to show an interested pupil which was met with scorn.
    You've only know these people 6 weeks, and most people are not so horrible that they are ready to instantly hate new members of staff for absolutely no reason. Maybe a little self reflection here as you managed in your thoughts about teaching in the first paragraph. It can be harder when you are reflecting on what it is that you do that makes people dislike you, but it could make a big difference. If I recall correctly you don't have a lot of friends and don't really spend much time with people who aren't your family or your in-laws. Are you out of practice? Are you forgetting some of the basics? Are you showing an interest in the lives of the other staff members or are you just telling them about your life and expecting them to be interested with no reciprocation? Are you talking or behaving in a way that could be viewed as showing off or acting superior or disdainful?


    Everyone in the school is indeed busy but they seem to have time for gossip at lunchtime (called "dinnertime" ) at this school.
    This, in a nutshell, is probably why people find it hard to warm to you. Do you see that at all? Can you understand why you might rub people the wrong way?

    On here, we are all rooting for you because you have opened up to this forum and we know that there is a decent, kind, thoughtful Alex under the surface who is trying to be a better person even if he sometimes struggles. Others will only see the surface, so what are they seeing?
    • Red-Squirrel
    • By Red-Squirrel 22nd Oct 17, 10:04 AM
    • 2,780 Posts
    • 7,421 Thanks
    Red-Squirrel
    I fail to see how not attending a staff meeting means I am failing to provide opportunities for pupils? On another point, I am not a paid member of staff. In fact, as a student, if I do go back after half term I will be paying to be there. Therefore, I would argue the same rules cannot apply. Further, the terms by which I signed to as a student has no such clauses pertaining to the definition of directed hours.

    Whilst I won't go into the full details of why I needed to see the tenant, finding a time was difficult due to the tenant's working hours and had another time worked, I would have been at the meeting.
    Originally posted by AlexLK
    Oh Alex, you don't even realise that you've behaved poorly here, do you? Teacher training might not be paid, but that doesn't mean its a hobby or that parts of it are optional. This is the nature of vocational training.
    • amanda p
    • By amanda p 22nd Oct 17, 12:07 PM
    • 33 Posts
    • 182 Thanks
    amanda p
    As a former teacher, I can see how you might come across so to speak. We all know students have to learn but believe me there are never enough hours in the day to teach the children and give the best to the student. It is very much a case of observing their methods of dealing with the difficult ones and taking on board everything in school life, even staff meetings. Yes the lunchtime gossiping is the unwinding time for staff, so they can face the afternoon ahead.......

    Your biggest error was probably wearing your 'old school tie' on the first day, this will not have endeared you to the people you are working with. I think you have also made a comment about teaching for a yearly salary of £23,000 to start. Yes this is the reality and yes a lot of people are bringing up children, paying mortgages on this. This is the real world and until you embrace this and look beyond the privilege you have been raised by you are going to have a problem.

    There was a programme on TV a good few years ago about a group of highly privileged young people from Harrow, Eton and Charterhouse who went with a company called, I think, Teach First. They were put into sink schools close to London. One of the girls was absolutely hopeless, couldn't hack it at all. But the best of the bunch was the boy from Eton. He could not believe how some of these children lived, what they had to deal with and the empathy he had towards them was unbelievable. He got a lot of stick from them because of how he spoke, how he dressed etc. but he persevered and at the end of the programme he went into full time teaching and I would imagine by now he has moved up the ranks.

    You have to realise that children are canny little things, they will always behave for their class teacher, but bring in a supply teacher, a student, a TA and they instinctively know they can play them up.

    I think deep down you could become a very good teacher and you should stick the year out , however uncomfortable it might make you feel. If your wife wasn't working your parents didn't have money and this was going to be your main job I wonder if you would view it differently?

    Real life isn't easy and giving up at the first hurdle doesn't give out very good messages.
    It is a difficult profession but believe me when the little six year old who could barely read a word, stands up at the carol service and reads a whole passage from a book, or the little girl who runs in saying she has joined a library because she can read and wants lots of books. Those moments make it all worthwhile and so rewarding.

    I taught Infant children and am absolutely in awe of the upper end of teaching ,11 years and over.
    Another ball game altogether that I still have the utmost respect for them.
    Give me the 'rug rats' any day!
    • Debsnewbudget
    • By Debsnewbudget 22nd Oct 17, 5:51 PM
    • 259 Posts
    • 2,443 Thanks
    Debsnewbudget
    Just saw this and thought of you Alex

    My only comment about you thinking of moving in with your parents is please listen to Mrs K . I know in the past she has not been happy with this idea.
    If you are going there to be a carer then make sure you build in back up systems as you will need holidays and time apart from the parents.


    "WHY I QUIT TEACHING AFTER JUST ONE TERM"

    by Andrew Critchell
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    My NQT mentor’s first words to me were “This will be the worst year of your life.” I don’t know whether this was meant to shock, be a reality check or whatever, but it seemed the most negative thing anyone could have done. It also, unfortunately, set the scene for what was to follow.

    I embarked on my sink or swim NQT year, and really did try to swim – but in the end, no matter how much I worked, it was not enough. In a typical day I would do 10 hours at school and usually be the last to leave, just in front of the caretaker. I would then crawl home in traffic to see my own children for a short time before my wife and I put them to bed.

    Dinner would then follow, before I headed to the spare room between 8.30 and 9pm, turned the PC on and stayed there for another two to three hours. There were instances of marking books at 12.30am while I wondered just what the hell I was doing.

    At weekends I alternated between working half the day on both days, and working all day Saturday or all day Sunday (we were told during our PGCE course to maintain that important work-life balance by ‘Having one day off a week’). Either way, my wife – who has a demanding full time job herself – had to entertain and cater for our two young children on her own, while I felt guilty about (sometimes literally) pushing my kids away to sit at the computer, worrying about 30 other kids who had their own parents looking after them. The only evening I had off was Friday.

    ‘JUST WORK LONGER’
    If, after all this, I was meeting my goals, putting in a great performance and keeping on top of everything, the pain would have been bearable. The trouble was that the exact opposite was happening. I went from being graded ‘Good with outstanding features’ in my university lesson observations, to ‘Requires improvement’ quite quickly. My marking fell behind, to the point that I hadn’t looked at some of the foundation subjects for three weeks. I failed to meet several deadlines for submitting the 12 incarnations of the Individual Education Plans required for pupils in my class. Peripheral things – like my classroom audit, maintaining the class webpage, ordering new furniture and putting up new displays – just didn’t happen.

    My TA started at 9am after the children came in, and seemed to have so many responsibilities of her own that I was always having to tidy up, prepare resources and be ready for the next lesson entirely alone. I had little time to bond with colleagues, as I rarely left my classroom. I was even struggling to keep up with the never-ending planning and the frankly demoralising task of resource-hunting and differentiating that had to be completed ahead of each lesson. All in all, I felt that no matter what I did or how long I worked, I would constantly fail. When I broached this with my mentor, her response was “Just work longer.”

    At the time, I was a 40-year-old male with a 1st class degree and 18 years of professional experience working in London. In previous jobs I had been interviewed on live national TV and radio, briefed peers and MPs on proposed amendments to planning legislation, serviced high-profile financial clients such as JP Morgan and The Bank of New York – yet here I was, sitting in tears alone at my desk in my classroom at 8.15am because I just couldn’t see how it was possible to do what was being asked of me. I felt utterly and totally hopeless.

    After just one term, I said to myself, ‘No, I am not accepting this.’ And I quit.

    WHAT NEEDS TO CHANGE
    Firstly, I don’t understand why there isn’t a centralised database of plans and resources that everyone can use, so that we are all on the same page and have time to focus on delivery. At the moment we have a tragic and needlessly inefficient situation where thousands of teachers are staring at their computer screens until late at night, all searching for the same things.

    Secondly, why go to all the effort of attracting people into the teaching profession and training them up, only to then dump them in it during their NQT year? Why can’t that first year be team-taught alongside an experienced teacher who can help and guide you throughout, assist with the necessary planning and paperwork and show you by example how they do it and survive?

    For me, this would have fostered an environment in which my desire to teach would have been nurtured and grown, rather than destroyed.
    • slowlyfading
    • By slowlyfading 22nd Oct 17, 8:58 PM
    • 12,928 Posts
    • 74,233 Thanks
    slowlyfading
    I fail to see how not attending a staff meeting means I am failing to provide opportunities for pupils? On another point, I am not a paid member of staff. In fact, as a student, if I do go back after half term I will be paying to be there. Therefore, I would argue the same rules cannot apply. Further, the terms by which I signed to as a student has no such clauses pertaining to the definition of directed hours.
    Originally posted by AlexLK
    Really? You are so exasperating at times! It does not matter that you are not a paid member of staff. You are doing your training year, you do exactly the same as everyone else does, paid or not. The same rules absolutely apply. I can't believe you thought you'd just miss one on a whim because you had something more important to attend to? It's a vocational career you are studying for, not a boardroom. And yes, to do most training you yourself have to pay. That's not something different because you're training to be a teacher.

    Whilst I won't go into the full details of why I needed to see the tenant, finding a time was difficult due to the tenant's working hours and had another time worked, I would have been at the meeting.
    So the only option was to go whilst the meeting was taking place? 7 days in a week and that small period of time was the only time you could go? Hmm.

    I'll be honest, I feel like you're belittling the profession that many, many people put their whole lives in to. The pay isn't fantastic, the conditions are constantly changing and children can be demanding. Parents often blame anyone else but their child too it seems. But, to many, myself included, it's a profession that is worth it, because we're helping young people build their future.

    I also feel like you're probably not helping yourself in terms of getting on with colleagues. The suggestion that you extend maths for 15/30 minutes so you can get everything done shows little understanding of how a school actually works. In a work place with over a thousand students, plus 100s of staff, this would throw the timetable into chaos. It needs a timetable and routine for everything to work. Yes, there are multiple times when you wish a lesson was that bit longer, so you could get that bit more in there, but it's not the case.


    Your training year and then your NQT year, should you wish to do both I suppose, will be the toughest things you ever do. Ever. It's so mentally draining and time draining too. I have never done anything like it, and only now do I feel like I've got my routines in place so that by the end of the week I've completed all that I need to. That's after teaching for 7 years! Like I said before, you have to really want to be there.

    I get the feeling you don't
    Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind - Dr Seuss
    Personal Finance Blogger / June NSD - 9 / Ultimate Dream Fund - £25,646.36/£306,000
    • Red-Squirrel
    • By Red-Squirrel 22nd Oct 17, 9:42 PM
    • 2,780 Posts
    • 7,421 Thanks
    Red-Squirrel
    Just saw this and thought of you Alex

    My only comment about you thinking of moving in with your parents is please listen to Mrs K . I know in the past she has not been happy with this idea.
    If you are going there to be a carer then make sure you build in back up systems as you will need holidays and time apart from the parents.
    Originally posted by Debsnewbudget
    Oh my word I hadn't even noticed that bit.

    Alex you seem to falling back into old patterns, I know you've had a disappointment and you're bound to feel down about it but moving in to your parents' house? Why? If they need help you don't always have to be the one to provide it, and you can help them in lots of ways without moving in, you live close enough!
    • daisy 1571
    • By daisy 1571 23rd Oct 17, 6:37 AM
    • 274 Posts
    • 3,392 Thanks
    daisy 1571
    Just popping in to say glad to see you back posting and like others I am concerned by the throw away comment about moving back in with the parents. I am sorry to your your dad has been in hospital but please think twice before going back there as you know how much they suck the life out of you. I know they would not be happy about it but there are other options to it being you ie home help type people. That way you can maintain your own relationship with them rather than being dragged into being the only person they see from morning to night and relying on you for all their entertainment.

    Take care, and glad to see you not labelling yourself a failure just because you tried something and found it may not be for you

    D
    Last edited by daisy 1571; 23-10-2017 at 9:48 AM.
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