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  • FIRST POST
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    • 5,836Posts
    • 38,562Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Looking for the silver lining
    • #1
    • 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    Looking for the silver lining 8th Mar 13 at 8:30 AM
    Well I'm back! After clearing my debt in 2010 and staying debt free for a couple of years I'm now back to square one. Mainly due to OH's work being so erratic (he is a sub contractor in the building trade). He has weeks at a time with no work and when he does get work the pays not great - but anything is better than nothing. My wages cover the bills and food thankfully but nothing else.

    Anyway a combination of OH not bringing much in and not budgeting properly has led to me building up credit card debt again (thankfully at 0%) of £5368.95

    I have realised that the only way to stay on top of things is to stick to a budget. What we were doing before is spending the money before we had it on a credit card and then clearing it at the end of the month. But OH can be at work one day and laid off the next so we didn't always have the money to cover what we'd spent and this is where we have been going wrong and how the debt has built up again by me having to transfer it to a 0% card.

    What's happening now is I'm trying to stay on top of things by having a "pot" of money in my monthly budget and sticking to that. Once I have cracked this then it should be easy to stay out of debt when it's paid off.

    At the end of the month whatever OH has earned is split as follows:

    50% is for petrol, OH's work expenses/mobile phone, and anything else we need that month

    25% is for holidays (I know we shouldn't be having holidays whilst in debt but they keep us smiling through the uncertainty)

    25% is for paying off the debt and when this is paid off this will become savings.

    So far I've stuck to this for two months. It's hard at times but this is the only way to do it. Should OH not bring anything in one month then I'm afraid we'll have to dip into what little savings we have in our emergency fund. BUT NO MORE ADDING TO THE DEBT!!!

    Currently the debt is split between two cards:

    Barclaycard £1800 0% until September 2013 -so this must be paid off first

    Halifax £3568.95 0% until 2015 - so a bit more breathing space on this one but still want it paid off asap.

    I'm doing the grocery challenge and the virtual sealed pot and doing well with this. The VSP will pay for Christmas.

    Decided to do a new diary as it helped so much last time - so here I go again on my second debt-free journey. Determined this will be the last time.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
Page 263
    • milann
    • By milann 2nd Jan 18, 2:52 PM
    • 1,732 Posts
    • 8,079 Thanks
    milann
    Hope you have a good day at work - it's good to get back to normality and routine !!!128077;
    I can't wait to get back....
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 2nd Jan 18, 7:53 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Thanks for your thoughts everyone, much appreciated to get other opinions. I wish DD would move out but she can't afford it and we can't afford to help her. She pays board, which comes in handy, she cooks for herself and because she works shifts I don't see her much, that's the plus side. One day ....

    Work was ok, hardly anyone there and so quiet that it was almost depressing. Everyone just seemed really flat.

    It was good to get out of the house properly and not just to the park or local shops.

    Went to Homebase at lunchtime and got some wood glue, a screw box for Mr SA and a few other bits not on the list but needed.

    Also bought a Christmas present from Boots half price to start off the stash - ideally I want to pick things up as I see them throughout the year.

    Phoned the kitchen place about the oven and they came out and fixed it a couple of hours later. The fan had gone so the oven was overheating and cutting out.

    And finally today is AFD 1 of January.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 2nd Jan 18, 8:23 PM
    • 55,020 Posts
    • 219,765 Thanks
    beanielou
    Blimey, the fan should not go so quick surely.
    Glad that it is fixed though
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • WannabeFree
    • By WannabeFree 2nd Jan 18, 8:30 PM
    • 1,616 Posts
    • 14,108 Thanks
    WannabeFree
    I can't believe DD is older than me I think she needs to realise just how lucky she is and show you some respect! I don't and haven't lived with my Mum for over 13 years and do more for her than DD does for you!

    Sorry if that seems harsh but it does seem she's taking advantage of you.

    Glad oven is sorted x
    “Once you hit rock bottom, that's where you perfectly stand; That's your chance of restarting, but restarting the right way.”
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 2nd Jan 18, 9:12 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    You're right Wannabe, it's not harsh it's true. I've made a rod for my own back. I'm starting to wonder if she's got a personality disorder as she's like it with everyone. When she was a little girl she was super sensitive and would get upset over the least little thing. Everyone trod on eggshells with her and I think this is where it stemmed from. She's had medical treatment for severe PMS, I think she has permanent PMS! I think it'll take her moving out to change her attitude.

    Beanie - just unlucky with the oven I guess.

    Get me, I'm sitting here with a cup of herbal tea
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 2nd Jan 18, 9:23 PM
    • 55,020 Posts
    • 219,765 Thanks
    beanielou
    Does your DD manage at work do you know?
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 11 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.***
    ***Keep plodding***
    Out of debt, out of danger.
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 2nd Jan 18, 9:31 PM
    • 1,978 Posts
    • 12,242 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    It was quiet in work at my work today as well SA. I don’t really think the office will be full till next week.

    Good idea on the pressies as well. My DD does this - she says that some years she doesn’t need to buy much more by the time Xmas comes around.
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Ad Hoc Savings - 20/05/2018: £646.59
    MONTHS TO RETIREMENT: 35!
    My diary: “Paid off the £31,0000! BUT- still scrimping!”
    • JWPopps
    • By JWPopps 3rd Jan 18, 10:53 AM
    • 328 Posts
    • 1,737 Thanks
    JWPopps
    Hi SA,

    Gosh I can't believe your DD is still at home, my mum's been out for months now!!

    Hope you're having a good day today, and may 2018 bring you lots of luck and happy times!
    Mortgage: £86,182.17
    Credit Card Debt: £1,702.42
    Loan Debt: £5,306.47
    Savings: £600.00


    • milann
    • By milann 3rd Jan 18, 11:54 AM
    • 1,732 Posts
    • 8,079 Thanks
    milann
    Hope it's a bit livelier today at work.
    Has Mr SA enjoyed his new tool boxes?
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 3rd Jan 18, 7:28 PM
    • 6,183 Posts
    • 22,713 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Hope work colleagues were more jolly today SA! xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Jan 18, 8:53 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Beanie not sure what you mean by DD managing at work, if you mean manages people then good grief no, she'd just go round shouting at everyone! But if you mean the other manage, this is why she does the late shifts. She has also been treated for anxiety, insomnia and agoraphobia which started when she was at school. She rarely goes out and buys everything online. I think she's got herself into a rut she can't be bothered to get out of.

    Had to get up at 3am to close the garden gate as it was banging against the wall in the wind. Our wheelie bin lid had blown open too and there was rubbish all over the pavement. Almost got blown over walking to work too.

    Work was a lot livelier today as more people were in. I was hoping for another day of catching up with my to do list but it started getting really busy in the afternoon. No doubt it'll be back to manic by Friday.

    Went to the gym at lunchtime plus today was NSD 2 and AFD 2. Got a mug of herbal tea again tonight
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 3rd Jan 18, 8:59 PM
    • 4,426 Posts
    • 30,694 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Glad work was a bit livelier today. It was very windy here too, but nothing seemed to get damaged.

    You doing well with the no spending and the new alcohol .
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 3rd Jan 18, 9:00 PM
    • 4,426 Posts
    • 30,694 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I feel a bit sorry for your DD. I know she can be awkward but she obviously finds life very difficult to cope with.
    Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 OCTOBER 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund. Save for house repairs.
    "Tough times never last, but tough people do" - Robert H Schuller
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 3rd Jan 18, 9:08 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    I waiver between being cross with her and feeling sorry for her.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • milann
    • By milann 4th Jan 18, 10:23 AM
    • 1,732 Posts
    • 8,079 Thanks
    milann
    Think I'm with you feeling sorry then cross with your dd. There's obviously more to it than not being bothered but it must be infuriating and sad to watch.
    I take my hat off to you SA
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 5th Jan 18, 4:07 PM
    • 6,183 Posts
    • 22,713 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Hope all ok SA. Happy Friday xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 5th Jan 18, 7:40 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Was just too tired to post last night.

    Last thing about DD as it's been getting me down thinking about it - I think her problems stemmed from her finding my mum collapsed on the first day of her school summer holidays aged 13. She was very close to my mum and my mum adored her. This collapse was unfortunately a brain tumour too far gone to treat and she passed away a month later. Fast forward two years we lost MIL to stomach cancer, DD was very close to her, this was also just a matter of 4 weeks from diagnosis to death. Then what with her dad 5 years ago and her having to get rid of a baby due to epilepsy medication - I don't think any of this has helped.

    Anyway, that aside, I've felt very down myself over the past week, can't pinpoint an exact reason, maybe just January blues or maybe just thinking about everything - I don't usually think too much, I just live day to day or it would drive me nuts.

    Apologies for not sounding like my usual cheerful self.

    In other news I've not had any more AFDs or NSDs since Wednesday. I've added some more to VSP and holiday fund, will update progress at the weekend. Should've gone to the gym today but went for a walk instead.

    Going to brave WW tomorrow, hoping the damage won't be too bad. Grandkids visiting too. Then Sunday we'll have another crack at DD's wardrobe now it's been fixed with Gorilla glue!
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • please-let-me-be-lucky
    • By please-let-me-be-lucky 5th Jan 18, 7:44 PM
    • 8,835 Posts
    • 51,769 Thanks
    please-let-me-be-lucky
    Sending lots of hugs Xx

    Has DD ever seen a counsellor?

    Hope you have a lovely weekend Xx
    Debts @ LBM £23,729.31. Debts @ 08/04/2016 £0

    NSDs achieved in 2018 30/60
    Best win so far - holiday to Florida
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 5th Jan 18, 8:06 PM
    • 5,836 Posts
    • 38,562 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Yes she has Lucky.
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £296.07
    Debt £2400
    June 4 NSDs 4 AFDs
    Weight loss 0.5/6LBS
    Emergency Fund £2000/£10,000
    • milann
    • By milann 5th Jan 18, 8:23 PM
    • 1,732 Posts
    • 8,079 Thanks
    milann
    I'm not surprised you get down from time to time - think what you have coped with and how your life has changed these past few years - many would have crumbled. Has time off work over Christmas given you too ong to think maybe?

    Have a good weekend do and enjoy your grandkids.
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