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  • FIRST POST
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 6th Nov 11, 8:50 PM
    • 2,212Posts
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    Alice in Poorland
    We are about to pull the purse strings soooo tight!
    • #1
    • 6th Nov 11, 8:50 PM
    We are about to pull the purse strings soooo tight! 6th Nov 11 at 8:50 PM
    Hi All,

    Like a lot of people on here I have been lurking on this site as a watcher for a number of years and during this time I have also watched our finances spiral out of control. Today I have had my LBM and oh boy could I cry.

    I have just done our SOA (which I will post once I've got all the info present and correct). Without the morgage I think we owe approx 30K, we've run out of money this week and have still got to pay out £350 before Thursday (all direct debits), this shortfall has been caused by my OH changing to weekly pay and all the bills come out in the first week on the month (well partly, the other reason is just that we owe so much). Will ask the bank tomorrow for an extension to the overdraft.......I can hear the 'I don't think so' all ready.

    Everthing is such a mess, our finances have spiralled out of control, I'm such a mess (could do with a complete makeover and dramatic weight loss), I can't keep up with the housework, the garden, the kids, Oh and I work full time too.

    I am truly hoping that we can get back on the straight and narrow and sort out our money problems. Then I will hopefully feel that everything else that needs sorting easier to tackle.

    Apologies for rambling on, I'm just feeling very alone and like a complete failure at the moment.
Page 162
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 1st Apr 18, 9:10 PM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    We've a busy but lovely day with having family round for lunch. Didn't do the big Easter egg hunt that we've done on the past, DS3 is just growing up too fast.. I did decorate the table with a few little chicks and eggs I found in the craft box but nothing OTT.

    Have updated budget and spending diary. We are currently paying Cabot/Yorks bank £5 per month. Don't know that I was thinking that we weren't paying them anything at all. March we spent £180 petrol and £625 on food and toiletries Only managed 9 NSDs last month. I know I can do much better.

    Spends coming up - keep paying towards school trip, DS has his driving test soon so need to look at car insurance, car in for service next week, still childcare to pay in holidays and we start paying council tax and water rates again this month.

    Loving this extra long weekend. Hope everyone has had a good day. (I've eaten far too much chocolate )

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • Spendless
    • By Spendless 1st Apr 18, 10:28 PM
    • 20,051 Posts
    • 33,094 Thanks
    Spendless
    Glad you've enjoyed your day Alice.

    I remember the year my DS didn't want to do the Easter egg hunt. I was upset, the same weekend fitters had completed our new kitchen and we moved a fridge into the conservatory behind a wooden door (there'd prev been a freezer there). As the kids didn't know this, I told DS I had instead put the eggs in the fridge as per his request but his quest was to find the fridge. He didn't find it as funny as I did.

    How long has DS1 been out in America? Am sure my answer of 'forever' is not quite correct.

    Goodness knows how you've managed it, funding eldest in the states, paying off debt and keeping the household going.

    Enjoy the long weekend.
    • Verbatim
    • By Verbatim 1st Apr 18, 10:56 PM
    • 4,564 Posts
    • 13,533 Thanks
    Verbatim
    Loving your signature Alice! You're so close to paying off Santander, the Barclaycard loan and Virgin/MBNA. Looks like you'll be under £10,000 in no time.
    I agree with Spendless in that I don't know how you do it all. And you're the pegging out queen.

    I've eaten far too much chocolate as I'm sure the scales will testify tomorrow. But today we had a stupendous Easter Sunday lunch cooked by my daughter and son in law at their place so feel very lucky indeed.
    CCs @0% £24k Dec 05 £19,621.41 Au £13400 S 12600 Oct £11,981 £9481 £7500 Nov £7250 D £7100 Jan 6950 F £5800 Mar£5400 May £4830 June £4660 July £4460 Aug £3200, S £900, £0 18/9/07 DFW Nerd 042
    • jackie_w
    • By jackie_w 2nd Apr 18, 9:10 AM
    • 1,063 Posts
    • 5,612 Thanks
    jackie_w
    Hi Alice Ive always lurked on your board and never posted so hope you donmind.

    Regarding your DL can you not claim kinship payment? As far as I was aware as he is a member of your family and he is unable to live with his birth parents, you would be able to claim this (I think). Im in Scotland so not sure if its different for England, but I would definitely look into this.

    I work with vulnerable children and have heard of kinship payments and social services arent usually very forthcoming with giving this information out. I would definitely check this out. Contact citizens advice they should advise you more than I can x
    • brizzlegirl
    • By brizzlegirl 2nd Apr 18, 9:53 AM
    • 133 Posts
    • 814 Thanks
    brizzlegirl
    Have a great Easter Alice xx
    MFW..aiming to pay it off in 2022.. 2018 Savings Rate - Goal 25% [25.2% March ] Income Goal £45/£750 April Goals: AFDs 10/15; Declutter 60 items 03/60; LSDs 04/10; NSDs xx/10 Exercise 10/30 Aiming to be a true Frugalista!
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 2nd Apr 18, 11:07 AM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Hi Spendless, and thank you. I just keep plodding. DS1 has been away for nearly 4 years. He was awarded a scholarship programme. He has had a fabulous time but it has cost us quite dearly financially.....and not to mention emotionally. . We didn't read the small print!

    Sometimes the kids just don't appreciate being our source of entertainment, do they.

    Hi V, yeah I think debt free within 2 years might be pushing it at bit. But I am to pay the 3 small era debts off, and get under 10k as soon as I can. Glad you have a lovely day.

    Hi Jackie, i don't mind at all, you're more than welcome.. Thank you for the post. Yeah we are going to speak to social services and see what the next step is. I am part of the problem, I don't like asking. will see what we can sort out.

    Xx
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 2nd Apr 18, 11:21 AM
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    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Today has not started well on the eating front. J@ffa cakes for breakfast. . Had full intentions of doing a cooked breakfast but DL and DS3 had already eaten before I came down. Now they're asking if they can open a chocolate egg!! I've told them they can have an egg each but that's it for now. I was hoping to use the chocolate bars out of the eggs for lunch box snacks.

    Not sure what to do today. Weather is too wet to doing anything outside, cinema is too expensive, don't really want to go to the sports club, bowling possibly?? Could go and get some popcorn and snacks and watch a film. Or we could just got back to bed. Dont really want to spend any money.

    Currently got 2 loads finishing off drying the on the heated airer. Have got another 2 loads to do. Got some paperwork in the kitchen to sort but generally the house is looking fairly tidy.

    Must do meter readings!

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • Eager_Elephant
    • By Eager_Elephant 2nd Apr 18, 11:43 AM
    • 4,330 Posts
    • 24,371 Thanks
    Eager_Elephant
    I am not sure if I am just a bad mum or maybe I lack that maternal instinct but I find that we are so busy all of the time that it is nice to just be.

    By that I mean we are all in the house pottering about doing our own thing, in our casual clothes just not rushing about whereas for most of our time we are clock watching to get to school and work so its nice to just not do anything.

    I like sitting here at my computer just listening to the noise in the house of everyone doing their own thing but still being quite satisfied.

    As I type this DH is on the bed snoring, he has got up and done the animals but had a bad head for 2 days which has wiped him out completely. DD is still asleep, who knows what time she went to bed, one dog is snoring with DH, the other is chewing a bone and I can hear the traffic outside.
    Apart from DH's snoring I actually love it but maybe I am just odd.

    Getting back on track, I would be going for the movie indoors with snacks. We have Sky and you can either rent a recent movie or even buy so you watch it straight away and you get a DVD copy in the post (handy for sleep overs). Cost is under £10 and we usually have snacks in the house so I reckon that saves at least £40 on going to the cinema.
    Ninja Saving Turtle No. 34 for April
    NSD - 0/15
    (up to 2/4/18)
    My Diary is here - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2175629 (Eager Elephants Effective Everyday Excursion)
    • Eager_Elephant
    • By Eager_Elephant 2nd Apr 18, 11:44 AM
    • 4,330 Posts
    • 24,371 Thanks
    Eager_Elephant
    Hi Alice Ive always lurked on your board and never posted so hope you donmind.

    Regarding your DL can you not claim kinship payment? As far as I was aware as he is a member of your family and he is unable to live with his birth parents, you would be able to claim this (I think). Im in Scotland so not sure if its different for England, but I would definitely look into this.

    I work with vulnerable children and have heard of kinship payments and social services arent usually very forthcoming with giving this information out. I would definitely check this out. Contact citizens advice they should advise you more than I can x
    Originally posted by jackie_w
    Thanks for posting this Jackie, I knew there were payments but couldnt remember the name - at least with the official name the social worker cant deny knowing what the payments are.
    Ninja Saving Turtle No. 34 for April
    NSD - 0/15
    (up to 2/4/18)
    My Diary is here - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2175629 (Eager Elephants Effective Everyday Excursion)
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 2nd Apr 18, 12:22 PM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Agree EE, whilst I'm battling with what to do today the kids have roped OH into a FIFA fest on the Xbox. and they all seem perfectly happy. so yeah maybe I overthink and try and do what I think everybody thinks we should be doing.......when all we really want to do is nothing.......does that make sense..

    I've done the meter readings and we have used £35 in a week. Still high by our standards.

    Thank you for the info re kinship payments.

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 2nd Apr 18, 2:53 PM
    • 6,159 Posts
    • 22,448 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Cant believe DS1 has been away nearly 4 years Alice .

    All seems well in your house. You're so good for taking in the DL xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • Eager_Elephant
    • By Eager_Elephant 2nd Apr 18, 7:31 PM
    • 4,330 Posts
    • 24,371 Thanks
    Eager_Elephant
    Agree EE, whilst I'm battling with what to do today the kids have roped OH into a FIFA fest on the Xbox. and they all seem perfectly happy. so yeah maybe I overthink and try and do what I think everybody thinks we should be doing.......when all we really want to do is nothing.......does that make sense..

    Xx
    Originally posted by Alice in Poorland
    I am lucky that my kids are older so dont need entertaining as such although they love a good board game - yesterday we played Cluedo.

    I see loads of people on Facebook who have children a lot younger than mine taking them all sorts of places every weekend and I just wonder when they can play at home and use their own imagination without having structured things put in their way.

    Hope the FIFA fest kept them occupied today.
    Ninja Saving Turtle No. 34 for April
    NSD - 0/15
    (up to 2/4/18)
    My Diary is here - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2175629 (Eager Elephants Effective Everyday Excursion)
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 2nd Apr 18, 8:18 PM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Hi mummy, I know its crazy how time flies. Yeah we're plodding along. I noticed on your diary you're in the 6K bracket. That's great.

    Hi EE, I see that to. It becomes a contest then doesn't it. If it hadn't of been so wet we'd of just gone the park and played football or cricket/rounders or something like that. Having said that it did brighten up early (well stopped raining) and i pegged some towels and thick sweatshirts on the line. Although didn't dry it certainly took the edge off them. Kids didn't go out, they watched a film.

    We've had jacket pots with cheese and beans, simple but clean plates all round. Today is NSD2.

    Hope everyone has a positive week.

    xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • Spendless
    • By Spendless 4th Apr 18, 12:19 PM
    • 20,051 Posts
    • 33,094 Thanks
    Spendless
    Of course jackie w- kinship payments. I had a feeling there was 'something' but I had no idea what it was or was called.

    Alice - a quick google brings up this. Perhaps worth a call so you know more before asking SS?

    https://childlawadvice.org.uk/tag/kinship-care/
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 4th Apr 18, 9:09 PM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    The heating is off, day 2. Currently on 2 NSDs. .

    Spends on childcare (holiday camp) this week £50. DS2 and DL are at home in the day eating us out of house and home. I'm thinking of doing them a lunchbox each in the morning and only letting them eat what's in it.

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • wishingthemortgaheaway
    • By wishingthemortgaheaway 4th Apr 18, 11:10 PM
    • 1,213 Posts
    • 5,546 Thanks
    wishingthemortgaheaway
    I turned my heating off yesterday too, I assumed everybody else's had been off for weeks.
    Love the lunchbox idea
    The 100 payment countdown (each payment = £400) 2018 Starts at 13/100 o/s £34,750.
    Jan 18 14/100 Feb 15/100 March 18/100
    Term Mortgage free date: October 2029 Current mortgage free date: April 2025 March 2024 Jan 2024
    MFW 2018 Challenge Member #162 £1400ish/£2,500
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 6th Apr 18, 9:28 AM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Hi wish, I'm sure that the last few years I've turned it off much earlier. But it has been a lot colder this year.

    Heating is still off Day 4, unless we have any really damp days hoping it can stay off now. Still only on 2 NSDs. Had the car serviced £145. Paid works lottery, and today will need to do a small shop and get petrol (both cars).

    Yesterday I pegged out, and last night did all the ironing.

    Right I'm off with the kids help, to do the housework. I'm going to have a deadline of get everything done by 12. Then lunch and then we can have a chill out afternoon.

    Must update spending diary and budget.

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 8th Apr 18, 8:46 PM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Can't believe it's Sunday night already.

    Yesterday we went to the kids football games and then last night we went to the sports club for a night out with friends. Ended up getting a takeaway on the way home (not very MSE, but it was a really good night). Total spends yesterday £76. Including £20 petrol.

    Today was NSD4. We had company earlier tonight so we did have the heating on for just a little while.

    Did some tidying up outside of the house today and cut the grass. We have a problem with the lawnmower, it's just not running right and does need looking out. OH said he'd get a quote to have it serviced. Hmmmm.

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 8th Apr 18, 8:56 PM
    • 6,159 Posts
    • 22,448 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Snap on the NSDs Alice! Sounds like youve had a lovely weekend xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £5419.83 - 08/04/18 - 76.61% paid off
    • Alice in Poorland
    • By Alice in Poorland 13th Apr 18, 11:05 AM
    • 2,212 Posts
    • 7,832 Thanks
    Alice in Poorland
    Before I go into this weeks ramblings I must tell you I only have one last payment of £41.68 to pay W3stcott (Bcard loan). I called them this morning as I couldn't find any paperwork and I knew it was getting close. We've been paying £50 a month, so will make the last payment and ask for a letter of confirmation. When they told me on the phone inside I was squealing like a mad thing. It's just given me a boost....that I really need after this week.

    Anyway back to life, we've had a terrible week. I won't go into all the details but DL has gone back home. Let's just say social services and the police were involved and it got way out of hand. My in-laws have stepped in so I'm really hoping things will work out for him. We'll have to see. We tried and sometimes that's all you can do.

    In other news, no pegging out as the weather is pants. Currently on 6 NSDs. Paid for extra child care this week £60, did a little shop last night (needed alcohol and chocolate!!) £43, plus petrol in both cars £45, paid works lottery. We've also had the boiler serviced £70, thankfully all ok. Lawnmower is currenty being serviced, that's £80 but it won't be ready until next week, phew.

    Apart from the major event this week nothing else of note has happened. We're having a chill out day, just me and DS3. OH is at work and DS2 is at school.

    OH hasn't done anything about his debts that need sorting. He's had another letter from Cabot saying the account is no longer on hold as they haven't heard from him. Hmm I'm not sure what that means.

    We did put the heating on for a few hours on two nights this week, that's because we had company. Hair appointment for me tomorrow, so looking forward to that hour of pampering.

    Although I'm feeling quite low after this week, the news about another debt about to be paid of has boosted me a bit.

    Xx
    DMP with CCCS started Jan'12 - £34,906 Jan'13 - £31,893 Jan'14 - £26,836 Jan'15 - £21,894 Jan'16 - £16,839 Jan'17 £14,415 Jan'18 £12,938ish! Self managed from Jan'17
    Jan 18- Bcard 1 £1126,Bcard 2 £4775,Bcard loan £230, C@ptl £2565 ,Ybank £3595,Virgin/MBNA £326 YB1 £0, S@ntader £321
    DFD - Jan 2027 Nov 2018 Jan 2019 - DFD not sure at the minute!
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