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  • FIRST POST
    • LSD
    • By LSD 13th Oct 11, 11:22 PM
    • 30Posts
    • 29Thanks
    LSD
    Feeling useless, stupid and thick!
    • #1
    • 13th Oct 11, 11:22 PM
    Feeling useless, stupid and thick! 13th Oct 11 at 11:22 PM
    I signed up with MSE this time 2 years ago, receive mailings which I don't read, and only know how long ago coz that's the date given for my last login! Since then have I done anything, reduced debt, spend more sensibly - no. Every few months I look at the mound of unopened letters and promise I'll start a budget sheet - do I - no!

    I thought I best start in the diary bit, don't usually post in any type of forum, not even a regular on FB, but I need to start somewhere, as most of you all have.

    Where to start? Earn decent money, work as a self employed contractor, set up a limited company. Have a 5 year old which is really why now I need to sort my mess out as I feel a failure for not enjoying life with my baby, and now he's started school. No support from father since child conceived.

    The feeling of uselessness is compounded by knowing I am responsible for another life. Before he was born my working life of 20 odd years I only worried about ensuring I had enough money for cigs and tea!!! I paid rent/mortgage when I felt like it, have applied for more stay of executions from eviction than the digits on my hand (maybe feet as well), even managed to escape eviction whilst bailiffs at door with locksmith! Managed to get a bankruptcy order cancelled, have elec/ gas swapped from meter to prepaid then back again a few times, bailiffs at door numerous times, car clamped. The whole gambit - do I fix up, wipe my brow with relief I escaped and adjust my spending - no. In fact it's so bad I consider my money my money to spend, and pay bills in lumps sums, when they pile up ( or incur bailiff, solicitor or other fees) when I feel the pressure on rather than pay monthly bills like ordinary normal folk.

    I've had enough ! I'm now in my 40's, have a great little boy to consider. Always had a poor credit rating, despite having a gross income of up to 4k a month I only got a credit card of 200 a couple of years ago, and recently another of 500. Really not such a bad thing as gawd only knows how much I'd rack up on credit. Dont even know how much is supposed to come out my bank account, and spend without price checking (how much's a loaf of bread and a pint of milk???)So no credit, no HP, just mortgage and car. My biggest fear is the tax man as I haven't submitted accounts for two years!

    So, I'm about to venture on this path of money wiseness, do a SOA, open letters, and tackle this.

    I'm hoping writing this money diary ( sorry if too much info) and reading some of these great posts will spur me on to do this. L
Page 2
    • LSD
    • By LSD 22nd Mar 13, 8:05 AM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Thanks Pmo2, finished opening and entering on spreadsheet at 2 in morning - so tired now but this is the furthest i've come. Need to keep this forum permanently open so that I can note my progress. I need to keep up the momentum.

    Next step is sift through n check duplicates, and check which are 'live', some have been paid. Maybe Ill get as far as completing a SOA next week.

    But due to my irresponsibility, the bulk of the outstanding are parking fines!!!

    BUT feeling kinda of elated I'm a big massive step towards at least knowing what Im dealing with.
    • LSD
    • By LSD 22nd Mar 13, 9:41 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    At it again. Just looking over my spreadsheet, as called Thames Water and wanted to update. They were about to start deducting for new financial year of 306.44 for house I sold last year November (had been overlap of two homes so they had my new address).
    I also had arrers with them. On my spreadsheet this amounted to 2089.59
    Called Thames.
    Old address - arrears of 88.17 - paid
    New address (2 years metered) 648, arranged payment plan of 54pm x 12
    They will notify debt collection agency

    Have I really just wiped off 1353.42 with just a phone call ??
    • LSD
    • By LSD 22nd Mar 13, 9:58 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Oh I've identified more.
    Had demands on a car I returned. 1832.43
    Checking over final figures from sale of house, they had put a charge against it, so its now paid
    Another debt gone

    Have just created my signature, going to update with this now :-)
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • LSD
    • By LSD 22nd Mar 13, 10:24 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Ok, Im doing this because I need to keep a track of my journey.

    This is no way is my actual debt, but due to my mismanagement in recording, filing, and the duplicates/triplicates I'm trying to reconcile etc my spreadsheet totals come to 43128.33 ouch!
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • LSD
    • By LSD 25th Mar 18, 3:25 AM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Oh dear lawd! I do feel in a better position than 2013, although its been more muddling through than due diligence. However....I now have a proper budget, although this is only a month old (yep, took me all that time!) Messed up with a couple of PayDay loans and credit card (they whopped it up from 200 to 1500). Probably need to update my signature thingie.

    I'd searched for ages looking for something that would work for me, and kept returning to the ML one, only to find you can no longer retrieve the previously completed one **.

    Now this is going to sound complicated! I stared fresh with the ML budget planner, and set up 6 additional sheets. I copied and pasted the spend sheet, deleted the headings, and entered names of companies. Each line was then allocated a group (piggy bank accs) - bill acc, general save, subscriptons, holidays/gifts, ISA, and (separate online card acc) spending. I then copied from copied sheet to each group sheet. The monthly column line was totalled for monthly and weekly spend. And it works! I know exactly how much needs to go from the salary acc to elsewhere.

    Its taken me a while to get my head round the weekly pay, with an additional overtime payment every 5 weeks or so, but grouping each account and working out how much to vire over each week, and sending spending money over to a completely different acc is now so easy. I feel so much better off financially, and there seems to be money to spare.

    Lets see how this go, as I say, its only been a month. Im hoping not to leave the updating so long
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • LSD
    • By LSD 25th Mar 18, 3:05 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    SOA deflated..
    I've just completed a SOA, and.it.dosnt.look.good!
    Needs tweaking as it now says I have nothing left over and spending over 1k more than income monthly!!!

    On the plus side, it made me look at the payday loans and credit card properly.
    On to tweaking
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • CapricornLass
    • By CapricornLass 25th Mar 18, 8:10 PM
    • 146 Posts
    • 467 Thanks
    CapricornLass
    Its dispiriting, isn't it, this being in debt business. I remember only too well feeling that the debt was never going to be cleared.

    But it did, and it will for you too. What you might have to do is to adopt new tactics.

    What really worked for me was to start keeping a spending diary of every thing, little or big, that you buy either on your debit card, or by cash. If you do that for a couple of weeks, then you will have a better idea where the pennies are disappearing to. Once you have that information, then you can start to avoid spending - or at least, thinking twice before you shell out your hard-earned cash!

    Have you tried posting your SOA up and letting others have a look at it, and make suggestions? Unfortunately there are one or two people - shall we just say that they don't always express themselves very well or consider the effect of their words on others? However, there are lots more of us who are the other sort, who remember what it was like for them, and are happy to make suggestions based on what worked for them.

    Good luck
    Sealed Pot Challenge no 265.
    • LSD
    • By LSD 25th Mar 18, 10:40 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Thank you I'm so undisciplined that any previous recommendation to keep a spend diary would have me reunning.
    However, I pulled off my bank statements over last 3 months, and the I was horrified at how many takeaways I've had through ubereats or just eat!!! I'm terrible at menu planning then shopping, then when I do it goes off before I fancy cooking.
    Now this may sound frivolous but I started ordering from hello fresh, 3 meals for 2, for the week. Instead of paying for a curry take out of 30 (+ all the rest) I now spend 34. Meals are good portions with a portion left over for next day. So I get and easy 6 meals from them
    My cash spends tend to be coffees, and cigs

    Posting my SOA will be a big step for me. But one I'll have to take soon
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • LSD
    • By LSD 9th Apr 18, 5:55 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Still at it, determined and optimistic...
    Still refining the budget but it's been a godsend and a horror equally!
    Just spent a week at centre parcs which I kinda budgeted for. Spent all day calling and changing DD and SO for bill payments only to discover I owe on some utilities. Another tweaking of the budget sheet.
    I've piggy bank accounts in Halifax, requested a charges refund from Santander, moved DD to a separate bill account in Halifax. Transferred spending money to the Arro card but not really getting in with that so have a Monzo card which I'm finding a lot better. Have also linked accounts with Emma which I'm finding fantastic.(anyone else used this?) Had a look at YNAB but that looks scary so keeping to the MSE one with my deconstructed sheets.
    I'm sure this gets all a lot easier.
    Shattered, time for a glass of something nice
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
    • LSD
    • By LSD 10th Apr 18, 6:01 PM
    • 30 Posts
    • 29 Thanks
    LSD
    Earned some, and saved some, found some...
    Ok yesterday and today has been quite a mixed bag.

    Kid Start - I discovered I had 48 in the Kid Start account. First signed in 2015 and used whilst I used the laptop, but then kept forgetting to go through the app on the mobile. The lost credits I've had using Amazon All in all I've been credited with 80 odd. 10 earned from house insurance. Not bad.

    Surveys - I've been completing these on and off for the last year, but need to work out where all the wallets are. Think I've accumulated abut 10

    Mobile - oh here's a saga! EE Contract of 49.99pm for 10GB and unlimited text and calls ended Nov 2017, and was previously told I couldn't upgrade as late payer/poor credit etc. So today I used USwitch and found some good SIM only deals inc EE. Only EE chat said uh uh, I couldn't 'upgrade' as poor credit/late payer etc. Wasn't pleased and asked if they were happy to have me paying 50 quid when I am clearly struggling to pay on time instead of putting me on a more affordable plan. Chat operator commiserated but said nothing he could do.
    Called to cancel as Three had a good deal of 15pm for 12Gb and unlimited class and text. EE said no problem, we'll match it! Job done

    DS mobile - lost it, but Centre Parcs found it! In post on way. then realised I hadn't budget in his GiffGaff 5 goody bag. Another tweak of the spreadsheet.

    Bank charges - I paid off 170 then realised I'll probably be hit with more unauthorised o/draft fees, so called them to hold charges, and have written a letter requesting they return charges over the last year by email, which was promptly returned with the explanation they only deal with vehicle finance, ugh!. Will post. Had this account for years and this is the first time I've been this o/drawn. Lets see what happens

    Electricity - sent through a meter reading, to be informed the lat one was July 2017. But good news, the difference between the estimate and reading was about 30, so an ever so slight teak of the DD and budget sheet.

    Subscriptions - I'm finding these a bit more difficult to factor in, as some of them are on the debit card which is linked to a current account. This is why I have set up a separate bill account to stop the subs eating into my calculated figures. Also realised I have 2 professional memberships subs that are paid yearly. Sheet tweak

    Rent - LL contacted me today to pay Aprils rent. I was thinking that's early, only to realise they mean March. So where i had paid in March, I've been operating a month in arrears. So I have to do some shifting around on the accounts now but if i hadn't completed a budget and set up the piggy accounts I would be in dire straits. Not sure I can do all of it this week but a good chunk of it.

    LL are coming round end of week, and I'm trying to pluck up enough courage to ask if they mind me renting out the spare room as a M to F let. here's hoping, as this will really help ease the 1500 rent payments per month.

    I never thought I'd finally get to the stage where budgeting becomes fun and liberating, although I have a great deal more to do, I'm hoping I don't lag off as previously. Its only taken 7 years
    That first step is a step closer

    March 2018 CAP1 199 SNET 965.70 SANT 395 178.95 MRLend 291.20 LENDS 247.08 CT 372.00

    Pre 2018 LBM 2011 2013/ Water 2089.59 736.17 / BlackHorse 1832.43 0
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