Unhappy rescue cat? Advice

CarbonImage · 10 July 2018 at 3:09PM

Thanks to you all for your excellent and non-judgemental advice. I'd like to respond to a few points directly but will definitely be taking it all on board!

RE pressure from the rehoming centre - this was a 'home-from-home' adoption, meaning the centre merely put us in contact with his existing owners. They never took him in themselves and all the pressure came from the owners directly, who I suspect were desperate to get rid of him because of how he was being around their existing 'babies'. I don't blame the centre in the slightest and they have been trying to offer advice, although none as good as has been offered here.

I agree most of the attacking sounds like it is probably misplaced playing. I have had some good results with the 'fist' and he has started purring occasionally when I stroke him. I think we felt that attacking the neighbour was a major setback and were worried that keeping him in was not a healthy option but maybe if we can stimulate him some more he will be happier. We also had a visit from the neighbour saying that if they see him in their garden again they would protect themselves with the hose if necessary which I didn't like the sound of but can totally understand.

He does only have one litter tray currently but it is in a secluded spot and he doesn't seem to have any trouble with number two's.

I think I would be able to cope if we could control the peeing. My other half has borne a lot more of the brunt of the aggression/playing so she is currently terrified of him which I think is influencing her to want to rehome him more.

I will get him some more toys and see if he begins to improve at all.

bmthmark · 10 July 2018 at 3:32PM

With all due respect I find it a bit wrong that your neighbour has said they would use the hose on him.
I doubt very much that he goes randomly up to the neighbour and attacks them (correct me if I am wrong). So if your neighbours cat comes in your garden do they give you permission to use the hose on it? - no they wouldn't because its not a nice thing to do. So they shouldn't do it!
Cats fighting each other is normal and will hopefully phase away. Its probably both of them anyway.

borkid · 10 July 2018 at 3:38PM

CarbonImage wrote: »

Thanks to you all for your excellent and non-judgemental advice. I'd like to respond to a few points directly but will definitely be taking it all on board!

RE pressure from the rehoming centre - this was a 'home-from-home' adoption, meaning the centre merely put us in contact with his existing owners. They never took him in themselves and all the pressure came from the owners directly, who I suspect were desperate to get rid of him because of how he was being around their existing 'babies'. I don't blame the centre in the slightest and they have been trying to offer advice, although none as good as has been offered here.

I agree most of the attacking sounds like it is probably misplaced playing. I have had some good results with the 'fist' and he has started purring occasionally when I stroke him. I think we felt that attacking the neighbour was a major setback and were worried that keeping him in was not a healthy option but maybe if we can stimulate him some more he will be happier. We also had a visit from the neighbour saying that if they see him in their garden again they would protect themselves with the hose if necessary which I didn't like the sound of but can totally understand.

He does only have one litter tray currently but it is in a secluded spot and he doesn't seem to have any trouble with number two's.

I think I would be able to cope if we could control the peeing. My other half has borne a lot more of the brunt of the aggression/playing so she is currently terrified of him which I think is influencing her to want to rehome him more.

I will get him some more toys and see if he begins to improve at all.

They might succeed in getting him but cats are quick and by the time they've turned the hose on he'll be gone. The best way I've found of getting rid of strange cats is to go out and clap loudly until they are out of the garden.

I've heard of some cats who need (demand) 2 trays one for urination and one for defecation. Also some are very fussy and require the tray cleaning instantly! Luckily mine go in the garden and we keep an area clear and dug over for them but they still prefer the newly planted seed beds which we have to kee

Rubik · 10 July 2018 at 4:13PM

We have had our rescue cat for over two years (she was actually a kitten when she came home with us, despite the centre saying she was 2 years old). She was described as "aggressive" by the rescue centre - no, she was terrified! While she likes to play "kill the hand", and can sometimes get a bit overexcited, she is playing, not being aggressive. She is also not a lap-cat, and in two years has only recently started jumping up on the sofa for cuddles on her terms, but definitely no sitting on laps. Some cats just don't. If you want something passive to sit on your lap, I would suggest a stuffed toy animal.

You really need to learn to know your cat, and understand his behaviours, likes, dislikes and body language. I am shocked that your partner sprayed water on a cat that has had a terrible start in life, it sounds as though the cat simply wanted some attention and to play.

Explain to your neighbour that your cat is adjusting to his new life and surroundings, and that the "aggression" is most likely self-defence - turning the hose on him WILL NOT help in any way.

As for the meowing at first light, does he have access to dry food during the night? How often do you feed him, and are you feeding him enough? Our cat starts making a noise as soon as our alarm goes off at 6am as she's keen to get outside and inspect her territory!

Your cat has been through a hell of a time, and he will needs reassurance, kindness and time to settle into his new home. It won't happen within a few weeks, it may take many months before he is settled and feels safe. It does sound to me as though you expected the "perfect" cat and one who would take 3 seconds to settle into your home and routine. Perhaps he would be better off with someone who understands cats, and has the time and patience for him.

CarbonImage · 10 July 2018 at 4:58PM

Rubik, thanks for your comments.

I think I am just finding this difficult as my partner professed herself to be an 'expert' in dealing with cats but obviously is not handling this very well at all, whilst I myself am doing the best I can with knowledge gleaned from the internet and no experience whatsoever.

I do agree that he probably needs time to settle and become comfortable with his surroundings. I just feel like there are so many things to try and lots of different suggestions it's difficult to know which ones to stick with!

This thread has definitely made me think that perhaps I should sit down with my partner and discuss if we want to really commit to helping this poor creature that we've brought into our lives and what the best way forward is.

With regards to the food, he seems to be constantly hungry. We have been feeding him a pouch and a half of wet food a day with a handful of dry food - half a pouch with about 10g dry food in the morning, and a whole pouch with about 5-10g in the evening. He's a small cat so we feel like this should be enough, and at first he was polishing it all off and meowing for more, but the past couple of days he has been leaving a little bit in the bowl which we took as a good sign.

Rubik · 10 July 2018 at 5:15PM

A pouch and a half is probably not enough - I would suggest a whole pouch in the morning, and one again in the evening. Leave a bowl with dry food out at all times so your cat can graze when he feels peckish.

There are lots of excellent suggestions, definitely try playing with him with a toy on a long handle - cats generally love these. Also, a small light pointer like this one (others are available) are good fun for both cats and humans - https://fetch.co.uk/kong-cat-toy-laser-toy-388993011?gclid=CjwKCAjwspHaBRBFEiwA0eM3kTA5_8Br14n7xu8TuIIFT9I2lg9e5BJV0251QnkVEJLBz8mPSMgNnhoCaiEQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds][ light pointer toy] Cat nip toys are also worth looking at. Visit your local pet shop and ask for suggestions to help your cat learn to play with something other than your ankles. It's a case of trial and error with toys and boredom busters for cats.

If he's not neutered, then he's likely spraying, neutering a personal thing, but it may make him a bit calmer and less likely to wander. And spray.

Check to see if the litter you are using is sharp - some cats avoid standing on sharp, jaggy litter as it's painful - wooden pellets that break up into sawdust are a good swap.

And finally - a cat is a huge responsibility, you do need to be totally committed to giving this little guy the best life possible with you, and put in the time that he needs, not just now, but for the rest of his life. Perhaps once you've learned a bit more about your cat's personality, and you've all grown a bit more used to each other, he will settle down. Don't forget he's been abused then passed from pillar to post in a short space of time, it will take him time to trust you, and to feel at home.

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CarbonImage · 10 July 2018 at 5:23PM

Thanks again for weighing in.

He is neutered, and it's definitely full pee, not just spraying. He's looked me in the eye whilst doing it on the windowsill before, and it's probably about 250ml each time!

The litter we use is what was recommended to us by his previous owners, but it may be worth us trying different stuff. We did have a 'roof' on his tray but took it off to see if that would help as I read that some cats don't like it.

Rubik · 10 July 2018 at 5:27PM

try a Feliway diffuser to help calm him, and stop the urinating outside his litter tray.

Slinky · 10 July 2018 at 5:37PM

Re the biting the neighbour, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if your neighbour tried to break up the fight between the two cats by picking one up. My Dad tried this a couple of times when our old cat got in a fight. Cat was so wound up he bit my Dad, probably not knowing who or what it was that was touching him. Cat adored my Dad so it wasn't that he didn't like him. Dad ended up having tetanus jabs on both occasions which were several years apart.

Never try picking up a fighting cat. I had one coming round regularly trying to beat up my cat, yowling going on below our bathroom window one night. A cupful of water splashing on the ground nearby was enough to shock and split them up and the other cat has stayed well clear since.

borkid · 10 July 2018 at 7:25PM

As others have said I think he needs more food. However if he is constantly hungry consider if he's been wormed. It's easy enough to do. My cats need worming at least twice a year, we can usually sense when but they are all hunters.

Unhappy rescue cat? Advice

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