Overpayers beware!!!

jockettuk · 8 June 2006 at 9:31AM

i lived with my b/f for 9 years, we bought a run down house got married, both working full time didnt have a big morgage as i made sure we could always afford it on one wage incase of emergencys etc. we had a child i gave up full time work and worked evenings and when he went onto shifts i worked weekends doing whatever to help get a little extra spending money.. we were a partnership and planning for the future.. unfortunalty things dont go to plan and we divorced. i stayed on in the marital home (suited daughters schooling) and he paid the morgage, which was smaller than paying actual maintence. i paid for all the up keep in the last 6 yrs even to the point of needing to put in new windows. and then when i told him i wanted to sell up and move in with my new partner he wasnt happy. ( he already lives with his new partner) we agreed to split the house 50/50 but i wanted the loan paid off for the windows and the house has gone up £60,000 since he left, and he left the house with loads of half done jobs.. its only fair he gets half but its also fair he pays half of the loan because at the time he couldnt afford it. as if i could.. so arguments proceeded and eventually a judge has had to interven..

divorce isnt fun but arguing over assets isnt fun either, i would get something in writing before during and after a divorce to make sure everyone knows what is expected of them in the event of a split.. this is what my partner and i are doing when i move in.. we going to a solicitors and getting everything down in writing so in the event of a split or a death no one is let down..

Bil2 · 8 June 2006 at 9:55AM

I really can't believe some of the fantasy 'rose tinted' opinions that have been expressed on this board!

While we are together, if I pay off the mortgage in 5 years time, I'm happy for us both to live in the property mortgage-free. I currently earn a bit more than he does and am always willing to pick up the bill for holidays etc.

However, think about it-

If I were to pay off the mortgage in 5 years time (we're talking about paying circa £50,000- I've already made overpayments of £20,000), although my husband will have only contributed to the half the basic monthly mortgage payments (£200 per month- £14,400 in 5 years), if he were to leave me he could claim half the equity (including my overpayments) of the property!

As I have chosen to make overpayments instead of saving (I have savings of 6 months worth of outgoings as 'emergency money'), if he were to claim half of the equity in the property, I wouldn't be able to simply pay him off. I would have to either get a new mortgage for half the equity amount or sell the flat to give him half the equity!

How the heck is that reasonable??? Are you people who say marriage is for 'better or for worse' etc insane or just plain stupid?

As he refuses to put his name on the mortgage (yes, that does sound extremely dodgy, doesn't it... see why I'm concerned now?), the only thing that I can do is to withdraw the overpayments that I have made from the mortgage (I've spoken to my lender and it is possible for me to do this). This is a real shame because even before buying the property, I had always intended on paying off a mortgage asap.

Because my husband's name is not on the mortgage, I (stupidly as it turns out!) thought that any overpayments that I made would be protected. I'm happy for half the equity of the place to go to him on the event of a split (he has contributed without fail to half the basic mortgage payments after all), but I'm not happy for him to receive any extra money that I've put in.

No one told me the implications about making overpayments when married. I thought that others should know and not repeat my mistakes!

Bil2

Ember999 · 8 June 2006 at 10:15AM

You shouldn't look at it as 'he's contributed half, 'you've contributed half' etc. You are married, you both jointly have contributed. Doesn't matter where the money came from, who earned it, who's name is on the pay packet. You are married, doesn't that mean anything to you? Maybe that is why divorce is so rife nowadays, with people having attitudes like that. Can't see the point in you getting married in the first place.

Bil2 · 8 June 2006 at 10:17AM

Ember999 wrote:

You shouldn't look at it as 'he's contributed half, 'you've contributed half' etc. You are married, you both jointly have contributed. Doesn't matter where the money came from, who earned it, who's name is on the pay packet. You are married, doesn't that mean anything to you? Maybe that is why divorce is so rife nowadays, with people having attitudes like that. Can't see the point in you getting married in the first place.

As I said- while we are together- I'm happy to share my posessions, money etc with him. I'm only concerned about what would happen if we were to divorce. Why don't you get that?

Ember999 · 8 June 2006 at 10:18AM

Bil2 wrote:

I really can't believe some of the fantasy 'rose tinted' opinions that have been expressed on this board!

While we are together, if I pay off the mortgage in 5 years time, I'm happy for us both to live in the property mortgage-free. I currently earn a bit more than he does and am always willing to pick up the bill for holidays etc.

However, think about it-

If I were to pay off the mortgage in 5 years time (we're talking about paying circa £50,000- I've already made overpayments of £20,000), although my husband will have only contributed to the half the basic monthly mortgage payments (£200 per month- £14,400 in 5 years), if he were to leave me he could claim half the equity (including my overpayments) of the property!

As I have chosen to make overpayments instead of saving (I have savings of 6 months worth of outgoings as 'emergency money'), if he were to claim half of the equity in the property, I wouldn't be able to simply pay him off. I would have to either get a new mortgage for half the equity amount or sell the flat to give him half the equity!

How the heck is that reasonable??? Are you people who say marriage is for 'better or for worse' etc insane or just plain stupid?

As he refuses to put his name on the mortgage (yes, that does sound extremely dodgy, doesn't it... see why I'm concerned now?), the only thing that I can do is to withdraw the overpayments that I have made from the mortgage (I've spoken to my lender and it is possible for me to do this). This is a real shame because even before buying the property, I had always intended on paying off a mortgage asap.

Because my husband's name is not on the mortgage, I (stupidly as it turns out!) thought that any overpayments that I made would be protected. I'm happy for half the equity of the place to go to him on the event of a split (he has contributed without fail to half the basic mortgage payments after all), but I'm not happy for him to receive any extra money that I've put in.

No one told me the implications about making overpayments when married. I thought that others should know and not repeat my mistakes!

Bil2

With attitudes like that, you should both get divorced and live alone. In my opinion, your marriage is doomed if that is how you are thinking. And, I really don't care if you slate my attitude, it's what I think and we have been happily married 19 years. Shocked to hear such opinions from a married woman prior to eating my Cheerios....shocking!

Debt_Free_Chick · 8 June 2006 at 10:44AM

Bil2 wrote:

I'm happy for half the equity of the place to go to him on the event of a split (he has contributed without fail to half the basic mortgage payments after all), but I'm not happy for him to receive any extra money that I've put in.

No one told me the implications about making overpayments when married. I thought that others should know and not repeat my mistakes!

Bil2

And are you sure that your assets will be excluded on divorce? Again, I thought that all assets were treated as joint and on divorce, the starting point is a 50:50 split

Broken_hearted · 8 June 2006 at 10:57AM

with this sort of attitude stay at home mothers would get nothing as they don't pay towards the mortgage at all. I think its sad people want to be negative about the future. Divorce happens but it happens a lot sooner if you keep saying what if.

funky-footprints · 8 June 2006 at 11:00AM

i was a temp when i met my dh, he was earning a huge amount of money back then, and when we married he put my name on everything, i didnt ask him to, but as his wife he wanted me to have an equal share, I did eventually get a job i was happy with, that could of progressed, but we made the decision together that I give it up to bring up our children, my husband has since bought other properties but always in both our names .... im quite alarmed that the original poster is thinking already to a point in time where if she and her husband split up he will get half of her house etc, does your husband know you feel this way op ? ? id be gutted that such a thought were going through my other halfs mind ? as a question ...do you have children together ? ?

Bil2 · 8 June 2006 at 11:01AM

Debt_Free_Chick wrote:

And are you sure that your assets will be excluded on divorce? Again, I thought that all assets were treated as joint and on divorce, the starting point is a 50:50 split

Yep, that's true... but at least if I were to take the overpayemnts out of the mortgage and save it, if he was to claim half my savings, I would have the money available right there and then (presuming it's not tied up in stocks and shares) to give it to him. If I keep the money in the mortgage, I wouldn't be able to pay him off easily. I'd have to extend the mortgage loan to cover his half of the equity (if the property had not yet been paid off) or get a new mortgage (if I had succeded in paying the mortgage off). By extending the mortgage, or getting a new mortgage, as well as paying out half the equity, I've also got to pay interest on half the equity!

Basically, taking the overpayments out and saving it in the event of a divorce is the better of two evils as far as I'm concerned!

Noozan · 8 June 2006 at 11:15AM

Bil2 wrote:

Yep, that's true... but at least if I were to take the overpayemnts out of the mortgage and save it, if he was to claim half my savings, I would have the money available right there and then (presuming it's not tied up in stocks and shares) to give it to him. If I keep the money in the mortgage, I wouldn't be able to pay him off easily. I'd have to extend the mortgage loan to cover his half of the equity (if the property had not yet been paid off) or get a new mortgage (if I had succeded in paying the mortgage off). By extending the mortgage, or getting a new mortgage, as well as paying out half the equity, I've also got to pay interest on half the equity!

Basically, taking the overpayments out and saving it in the event of a divorce is the better of two evils as far as I'm concerned!

But then surely you'd have to give him half of the savings and half the equity; in which case, if the remainder of your savings wasn't enough to cover half the quity, you'd have to find the money from somewhere to buy him out.

I have to say that although I don't agree with the "this is mine, that is his attitude" when you guys are married, I do find it very strange that he is not on the mortgage and is not willing to be on it

Overpayers beware!!!

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