out of place at work
Comments
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MillsMolls wrote: »I do work for a large well known organisation and yes some of you might see it as a joke and wonder if it’s anyone from your office, but this is not a laugh for me, it’s torture.
Apologies, I did not mean to upset you further. I don't think it's a joke, I think it's a situation that any one of us could find ourselves either in or inadvertently creating.:heartpuls Mrs Marleyboy :heartpuls
MSE: many of the benefits of a helpful family, without disadvantages like having to compete for the tv remote
Proud Parents to an Aut-some son 0 -
MillsMolls wrote: »The only reason I don’t touch their sweets/cakes is because they put their cakes next to their bank of desks and as stupid as it might sound but I’m terrified of going up there. I’ve only been up there once and saw the way they looked at each other. I did say thanks and happy birthday to whoever it was.
There is a central back of desks for treats and that’s where they should normally go and that’s where I put mine from my holiday.
I can speak to HR but I don’t see how they will agree to just move me. I can’t go back to my old team as there are no vacancies. I don’t want to resign as I have worked very hard for this company.
I do work for a large well known organisation and yes some of you might see it as a joke and wonder if it’s anyone from your office, but this is not a laugh for me, it’s torture.
I have been working in my new role for a while now. In truth, I don't really *fit in* because it is very cliquey and I'm quiet. I've worked really hard and gone through all sorts of rubbish to get this opportunity (they typically employ early 20s students who have just graduated so I'm like a senior citizen in comparison; and at their age I was flipping burgers at McDonalds).
I have been keeping my own records of my competence, as well as joining the union early on, just as a bit of a buffer if anything comes back on me.
Aside from that, I simply focus on being competent and getting the job done. And being nice to people when they are nice to me. And, to be fair, making some efforts to get to know people (shamefully, I document these in case I get stitched up and get put on performance review for being "too quiet").
I wouldn't say I suffer from mental health issues per se (hinting at your inner turmoil RE: the counselling. BTW I go to GA meetings weekly and talking about that stuff really helps me to deal with the problems), but I am a secret (internal) worrier. I literally worry about every interaction with my manager and with other people. Someone who doesn't say goodbye to me at the end of the day doesn't like me... But, personally, I've spent a long time tackling my own thought processes and generally I can recognise that:
1. There is usually some external factor affecting people (I'm overthinking it)
2. Point 1. is backed up by the fact that, on occasion, people are FRIENDLIER THAN USUAL towards me (people sometimes have off-days)
3. I'm a miserable-looking get with socialising not being my strongest point, so I need to at least make sure I have qualities which the employer recognises and appreciates (adapt or die)
It is all about earning your coin at the end of the day and, as long as they aren't trying to stitch you up, it is best just accepting the situation as it is and trying to take it a bit less critically. Maybe also seek alternative employment in the meantime. If the colleagues are truly intimidating then either just keep your head down and show your other qualities to ensure survival, or maybe find at least one person whom you can have social interactions with (just don't emotionally dump on them!).0 -
I know how you feel, in my job im made to feel lower than a piece of crap, nearly all staff are horrible to me and some have actively planned to ruin my relationship which failed. People are right it's not worth your health, a job is a job.0
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An alternative point of view:
Your colleagues are seeing someone who comes in each day, refuses to talk to anyone, avoids their desks like the plague and only talks to people she used to work with from another department. Won't ask for help when she's stuck until it's too late which takes twice as long for people to then sort.
True, but they don't know who I lunch with. I say hello etc but they choose not to answer. I do ask for help but am met with a frosty reception and by no means are they having to correct my work0 -
~Daisy_81~ wrote: »I know how you feel, in my job im made to feel lower than a piece of crap, nearly all staff are horrible to me and some have actively planned to ruin my relationship which failed. People are right it's not worth your health, a job is a job.
Hi Daisy, i'm sorry to hear you are in the same boat as me. I hope it gets better for both of us x0 -
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I have been working in my new role for a while now. In truth, I don't really *fit in* because it is very cliquey and I'm quiet. I've worked really hard and gone through all sorts of rubbish to get this opportunity (they typically employ early 20s students who have just graduated so I'm like a senior citizen in comparison; and at their age I was flipping burgers at McDonalds).
I have been keeping my own records of my competence, as well as joining the union early on, just as a bit of a buffer if anything comes back on me.
Aside from that, I simply focus on being competent and getting the job done. And being nice to people when they are nice to me. And, to be fair, making some efforts to get to know people (shamefully, I document these in case I get stitched up and get put on performance review for being "too quiet").
I wouldn't say I suffer from mental health issues per se (hinting at your inner turmoil RE: the counselling. BTW I go to GA meetings weekly and talking about that stuff really helps me to deal with the problems), but I am a secret (internal) worrier. I literally worry about every interaction with my manager and with other people. Someone who doesn't say goodbye to me at the end of the day doesn't like me... But, personally, I've spent a long time tackling my own thought processes and generally I can recognise that:
1. There is usually some external factor affecting people (I'm overthinking it)
2. Point 1. is backed up by the fact that, on occasion, people are FRIENDLIER THAN USUAL towards me (people sometimes have off-days)
3. I'm a miserable-looking get with socialising not being my strongest point, so I need to at least make sure I have qualities which the employer recognises and appreciates (adapt or die)
It is all about earning your coin at the end of the day and, as long as they aren't trying to stitch you up, it is best just accepting the situation as it is and trying to take it a bit less critically. Maybe also seek alternative employment in the meantime. If the colleagues are truly intimidating then either just keep your head down and show your other qualities to ensure survival, or maybe find at least one person whom you can have social interactions with (just don't emotionally dump on them!).
I thought I was over thinking it, but I don't feel I am0 -
Hi
I am still off work and starting to worry now as all I do is worry about work everyday.
I have spoken to Occupational Health and they have advised I shouldn’t go back to my current job and they will be telling HR this.
I am having counselling but I don’t know how to stop worrying about the future.0
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