Co-Executor Problems

Threecatz · 25 June 2018 at 9:36AM

Thank you for that YoungBlueEyes, I dont think it sounds silly at all, rather a good solution that keeps everything transparent. I appreciate you taking the time to suggest another way around my impasse.

The trouble is, my brother made it clear on the day my father died that he wants to do probate on his own, with me out of the picture, hence his solicitor keeps pushing for me to appoint them as my attorney ( to make it easier for me, you understand!) whilst my brother is only reserving his powers. I suspect that, if I agreed to this my brother would then step back in and take over. As I said earlier, l let him deal with my mothers probate by himself and, for reasons I wont go into, Im not going to let him do that this time around! So, for that reason, I dont think any alternative suggestion that I put forward will be accepted but I can try!

Kind regards and thanks again.

YoungBlueEyes · 25 June 2018 at 3:06PM

If you try it I hope it helps

I'm not a lawyer or solicitor, so I don't know how strong it'd be in a legal argument as they're 'only' texts, but it's better than nothing.

Hopefully it'll let your brother see that you're being completely transparent and will step back so you can get on with things.

Sometimes these things are more about emotions and past history than reason though

Threecatz · 4 August 2018 at 11:09PM

I!!!8217;m back again, I!!!8217;m afraid!
The saga winds on. To try and get things moving, I agreed, reluctantly, that, as my brother had requested, the solicitor he has instructed could handle the estate monies - I would arrange for the monies to be sent to their client account, they would draw up accounts and distribute etc.
Then the solicitor wrote insisting that I send the signed probate forms to them and they would check and send them off - I said no to that one, as I felt, as sole acting executor, it was my responsibility to ensure the application and accompanying docs are sent off correctly, although I did offer to send them a copy and undertook not to send off the originals until they had looked at the copy. They have now come back to say my brother doesnt trust me, which is rather ironic, has decided he is no longer reserving his powers but is going to act as well and so the solicitor is now insisting that I send the forms to them forthwith.
I would appreciate anyone!!!8217;s thoughts on whether they can insist on this. I would have thought it more appropriate for me to send the forms directly to my brother, as co-executor and it is up to him if he wants to run things past his solicitor, as he hasn!!!8217;t appointed the solicitor as his attorney as far as I am aware, or am I being unreasonable?
The other problem I have is that the solicitor wont release even a copy of the Will to me. I would have thought, as an executor, I would have a right to see at least a copy of it would I not?
Anyway, I would be very grateful for any further advice before I!!!8217;m driven completely round the bend by all this! With many thanks in advance.

Threecatz · 5 August 2018 at 8:01AM

Thinking about things overnight, it occurred to me that my role as executor is just as valid as my brothers’ but all I seem to have done so far is compromise to try and get things moving but that’s got me precisely nowhere, as all that comes back from the solicitor each time are further demands. What would happen if I say enough? Is it a question then of going to Court for a judge to decide who deals with the estate?

It’s the last thing I want to do but, other than me giving up and letting my brother deal with this, I can’t see any other way forward..

Keep_pedalling · 5 August 2018 at 9:28AM

Threecatz wrote: »

Thinking about things overnight, it occurred to me that my role as executor is just as valid as my brothers’ but all I seem to have done so far is compromise to try and get things moving but that’s got me precisely nowhere, as all that comes back from the solicitor each time are further demands. What would happen if I say enough? Is it a question then of going to Court for a judge to decide who deals with the estate?

It’s the last thing I want to do but, other than me giving up and letting my brother deal with this, I can’t see any other way forward..

Unless oe executor renounces or reserves powers joint executors have to act jointly. The solicitors are between a rock and a hard place as they are caught up in a rather stupid sibling feud.

You would be very unwise to try and have your brother removed, as it would be expensive and likely to fail. Your brother is not likely to shift his position on this, so simply to get it over with ASAP And get on with your life I would go along with what the original suggestion was if you brother will revert back to that position.

In this case I think solicitors costs are less important than the emotional strain of long drawn out battle, which in the long run could cost a lot more.

Threecatz · 5 August 2018 at 10:06AM

Thanks for the reply Keep. I’m sorry, I didn’t explain myself very well. I didn’t mean going to Court with a view to getting my brother removed, rather letting the Court decide who should deal with probate but obviously that’s not an option.
As I mentioned in a previous post, my brother dealt with probate for my late mother by himself but, due to issues I do not want to go into here, I cannot allow him to act by himself again.

Flugelhorn · 5 August 2018 at 10:15AM

Threecatz, suspect some of the problem is the change in family dynamics. Big Bro has probably always been BB and maybe this was encouraged / supported by parents??

Can be hard then when you are the only 2 left and Little Sis is standing up to BB (as you should).

You are right in your earlier post - your role is just as valid and you have had to compromise. Practice saying NO

Uncle was always considered to be the "head of the family" by my mother (even though he was younger) and she always deferred to him - not sure that he coped when I dug my heels in...

Threecatz · 5 August 2018 at 10:35AM

You’re right Flugelhorn, I’ve tended to go along with things in the past to “ keep the peace” - my mistake! Trouble is, if I say no and my brother continues to say no too, we end up in an impasse and I’ve no idea what happens then!

-taff · 5 August 2018 at 3:44PM

Did you act on the suggestions in post 4?

Threecatz · 5 August 2018 at 4:18PM

Hi Taff, yes, I have asked for the Will, or a certified copy, several times now but have been informed that my co-executor has instructed his solicitor not to release it to me.

As Seven said in that earlier post, they appear to be effectively holding me to ransom and forcing me to use their services regardless of whether I want to or not. Hence my previous post about whether my role as executor is equally valid and if so what options might be open to me to break this impasse. I’ve put forward various suggestions over the now months this has been going on, from us both using an independent third party, to paying proceeds into his solicitor’s client account for them to distribute but every suggestion is disregarded in favour of some new demand.

Sorry, very long answer to a short question:)

Co-Executor Problems

Comments

Categories

Get our FREE Weekly email full of deals & guides - and it’s spam-free