What a fudgewimple

andydownes123 wrote: »

Have you thought about keeping them in a padlocked garden with a shelter there - this is really good for them in lovely weather?

Not a good idea to leave them alone in a garden no matter how secure it is. Dogs are being stolen all the time, even when the owners are in the house. If they are pedigree designer dogs all the more reason for making sure the dogs are secure 24/7.

Op, I appreciate that the dogs are a valued part of your family, and they are calming for your mental health, but paying for them is hindering your attempts to get out of the debt cycle. You have to weigh one up against the other. The dogs will cost you thousands during their lives, have you factored that into the long term plan?

You may not like all the replies you get here, but without sounding too patronizing you need to earn more, or spend less. I'm not sure what else you expected to hear. Try keeping a spending diary, record every penny spent, and I mean literally every penny. Look at areas of your life that you can cut down on. Buying food is where you can cut down on spending, not eating out, no takeaways, take a pack up to work, shopping late for yellow stickers, buy supermarkets basic/value labels, cutting down on your intake of meat, cut out the snacks and junk food, no convenience ready meals. All will save you money.

Best of luck. ilona

Hello laveugle,
I am sorry you've had a tough day. People are kind on here but maybe don't always consider the impact of what they are writing on the recipient. I am sure posters meant their posts kindly and maybe as a reality check for you. I hop you will come back and keep posting.

I think you need to get really practical and thought I'd share some of the things I did (and still do) when I totted up the debts my ex-husband had left me with 10 years ago (almost £90k and most of it in my name and only a self employed income to support myself, my 2 kids and pay these debts!)

I did an inventory of everything I owned from food to toiletries - I realise that I hoard food when I feel stressed! I didn't buy anything I already had. I shopped with a list after meal planning and unearthed the delights of A1di/L1dl shopping - tracking all spends in my lovely book (see below)!!

I wrote a big list of everything that I owed, the interest rate, balance, minimum payment and date the payment due. I wrote a list of all of my direct debits, what they were for, amount, expiry and when they were due to be paid out. I cancelled the ones which were not necessary and made a note of renewal dates for insurances/utilities etc and got better rates shopping around at renewal time (this is my habit now!!).

I took a long hard look at all of my income (self employed/maintenance from ex/ family allowance etc) and in particular the DATE I was generally paid. I changed my direct debits payment dates to be able to coincide with when I had payments coming in from my business. I made minimum payments on credit cards etc before due dates and when I got pennies in from my various sources. I only covered minimum payments for about a year but it meant I learned good habits and I got a bit of clear blue water between me and the debt.

I set myself a weekly CASH budget for food/fuel/socialising and withdrew that each Thursday morning - I paid everything in cash!!!!!! If there was not enough money in my purse I learned to say no and do without - regardless of what it was. Cash is king!! I learned to take a breath and consider if I really needed to buy "this right now" and often the answer was that I didn't and could do without.

I read Dave Ramsey and I snowballed my debts. You can buy his books online quite cheaply, he has a YouTube channel or you can read his learnings for free!!

I learned what my triggers for spending were by keeping a spending diary (still do and find it a mindful experience) - I checked my bank accounts every morning (so no hasty surprises) and I slowly wrestled control. I think this maybe a useful exercise for you.

By doing this I had a proper look at what the current landscape is - used my self employed skill set to get a smart plan together and then cracked on!! You have self-taught yourself your role so you have the skills to work a plan you simply need to change how you frame things.

Personally I did my absolute utmost to keep my kids, my pooch, my home and my business trading and that was is a good motivation to stick to my budgets etc. On your dog front have you considered shaving one day per week off the walker and see how they get on - puppy pads are great (my dog is almost 20 and incontinent) and you could maybe secure an area like a utility room or kitchen for them to be in. I found it was by chipping away at every single penny I spent that I managed to learn to breathe and pay down my debts.

Writing a diary will help you keep the faith!

((hugs))

WM xx