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  • FIRST POST
    • smithers1981
    • By smithers1981 12th Nov 19, 1:56 PM
    • 754Posts
    • 537Thanks
    smithers1981
    40 year old male mid life crisis?
    • #1
    • 12th Nov 19, 1:56 PM
    40 year old male mid life crisis? 12th Nov 19 at 1:56 PM
    Is this a typical mid life crisis i was plodding along quite happily until last few weeks when my world has turned upside down.
    Last edited by smithers1981; 12-11-2019 at 2:06 PM.
Page 6
    • gomer
    • By gomer 4th Dec 19, 10:03 AM
    • 728 Posts
    • 1,323 Thanks
    gomer
    Just to clarify £100k equity in house so 50/50 I was planning to give her my half instead of £300 a month also offered to help with trips clubs clothes etc.

    She saw solicitor today and we gonna discuss things tomorrow currently on night shift.

    Not sure what options are as for pension she has more than me and we not married just wanted to cloud things so I couldnít easily be identified I know Iíve been selfish and hurt a lot op people.
    Originally posted by smithers1981

    ....And the girlfriend?
    • Gavin83
    • By Gavin83 4th Dec 19, 3:59 PM
    • 6,420 Posts
    • 11,181 Thanks
    Gavin83
    I really don't understand the point you're making.
    I asked a question.
    You said it was clear to you.
    I said it wasn't clear to me.
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    Seriously, how much more clearly do I need to spell this out? I thought it was entirely obvious, which the OP has now confirmed. I was being polite, in essence a ďI see your pointĒ when really I didnít understand how you couldnít see it at all. Iíve learnt a lesson though, Iíll just be more direct in the future.

    Anyway this is getting silly, Iím done with it now. The OP has now returned and confirmed what he was saying.

    Just to clarify £100k equity in house so 50/50 I was planning to give her my half instead of £300 a month also offered to help with trips clubs clothes etc.

    She saw solicitor today and we gonna discuss things tomorrow currently on night shift.

    Not sure what options are as for pension she has more than me and we not married just wanted to cloud things so I couldnít easily be identified I know Iíve been selfish and hurt a lot op people.
    Originally posted by smithers1981
    If you arenít married forget pensions, you need to focus on the house. You really need to get your 50% out of it. I really wouldnít recommend substituting that for maintenance, it will come back to bite you.
    • mimiduck
    • By mimiduck 4th Dec 19, 10:29 PM
    • 184 Posts
    • 82 Thanks
    mimiduck
    I'm pretty sure you kept saying 'wife' through out the post but now your saying 'not married' ..

    **Meanwhile bookmarking this thread**
    • gomer
    • By gomer 5th Dec 19, 8:39 AM
    • 728 Posts
    • 1,323 Thanks
    gomer
    No need to bookmark. I have a feeling the thread won't be going away lol
    • smithers1981
    • By smithers1981 5th Dec 19, 12:42 PM
    • 754 Posts
    • 537 Thanks
    smithers1981
    Only said wife so I couldnít be identified we not married, Iíve just messed up big time by getting smitten for young girl who isnít interested karma I guess.
    • 74jax
    • By 74jax 5th Dec 19, 1:15 PM
    • 5,257 Posts
    • 7,355 Thanks
    74jax
    Only said wife so I couldnít be identified we not married, Iíve just messed up big time by getting smitten for young girl who isnít interested karma I guess.
    Originally posted by smithers1981


    You call her wife on all your other threads too, the going on holiday thread doesn't really matter, but something like this thread, the advice you get regarding splitting up implications etc varies if married or not so it's worth noting that.
    Forty and fabulous, well that's what my cards say....
    • flanker6
    • By flanker6 5th Dec 19, 2:23 PM
    • 34 Posts
    • 34 Thanks
    flanker6
    Only said wife so I couldnít be identified we not married, Iíve just messed up big time by getting smitten for young girl who isnít interested karma I guess.
    Originally posted by smithers1981
    You aren't the first and won't be the last!


    But, as Gomer was saying in earlier posts, these things happen to people in already unstable/broken relationships.


    So your wife ( now you say girlfriend) has seen the relationship is broken beyond repair an, totally understandably, decided to move on.


    And, that's what you need to do too. Look to the future and ensure that you cherish the right person when she comes along.
    • gomer
    • By gomer 5th Dec 19, 5:13 PM
    • 728 Posts
    • 1,323 Thanks
    gomer
    You aren't the first and won't be the last!


    But, as Gomer was saying in earlier posts, these things happen to people in already unstable/broken relationships.


    So your wife ( now you say girlfriend) has seen the relationship is broken beyond repair an, totally understandably, decided to move on.


    And, that's what you need to do too. Look to the future and ensure that you cherish the right person when she comes along.
    Originally posted by flanker6


    I seem to remember i was slated for saying it too.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 5th Dec 19, 5:29 PM
    • 24,136 Posts
    • 64,913 Thanks
    Pollycat
    Only said wife so I couldnít be identified we not married, Iíve just messed up big time by getting smitten for young girl who isnít interested karma I guess.
    Originally posted by smithers1981
    You referred to her as wife in this thread too:
    https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=6037606

    My wife sold some toys of my daughters, for £100 via gumtree, i told her do not send items until you receive money, she told me she had received money.

    Posted toys at cost of £18 last week then yesterday she admitted she had not been paid, she is obviously upset and so am i at how foolish she has been.

    We have messages confirming price, and have proof of delivery from royal mail.

    Is it worth pursuing a letter before action perhaps leading to small claims court.
    Originally posted by smithers1981

    I suggest you stop all this obfuscation and tell the truth if you want relevant advice.
    • smithers1981
    • By smithers1981 5th Dec 19, 9:50 PM
    • 754 Posts
    • 537 Thanks
    smithers1981
    To confirm we not Married but after 15 years considered her my wife
    • flanker6
    • By flanker6 6th Dec 19, 8:54 AM
    • 34 Posts
    • 34 Thanks
    flanker6
    I seem to remember i was slated for saying it too.
    Originally posted by gomer

    Doesn't mean that it's not true!
    • gomer
    • By gomer 6th Dec 19, 9:53 AM
    • 728 Posts
    • 1,323 Thanks
    gomer
    Doesn't mean that it's not true!
    Originally posted by flanker6

    Absolutely. It just means it wasn't what people wanted to hear. lol
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