Inheritance

Hello,im in need of help or advise.Following a two year separation,we have agreed to divorce.(i have found out she was having a affair),but to make it easy,we are going down the two years agreeable line.My ex has come into a small inheritance, and i was wondering if i was entitled to a share.? Before anyone thinks im being greedy,i paid off a lot of debt for her,which she wont pay back.Thanks in advance.
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  • gettingtheresometime
    gettingtheresometime Posts: 6,911 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post I've been Money Tipped!
    edited 15 May 2018 at 2:39PM
    I have relatives that were in the same position although there wasn't the issue of one paying off the others debt.


    I lost any respect I had for the claimant - yes they were legally entitled to claim it but morally it was a totally different story
  • ska_lover
    ska_lover Posts: 3,773 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
    No I don't think you should pursue a claim - that is ugly behaviour IMO

    How depressing is the thought of working all your life and leaving gifts for your children, for a long gone ex to feel entitled to it?

    I think it is morally reprehensible to go after inheritance from someone else's family and benefit from a deceased persons hard graft and the fact you have been separated for two years, and she has recently come in to this may exclude you anyway

    The debts you speak of paying, that was your choice at the time to get involved with that..and however you dress it up, inheritance chasing is always going to come across as grasping

    Walk away and retain your dignity
    The opposite of what you know...is also true
  • TBagpuss
    TBagpuss Posts: 11,203 Forumite
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    How it works is that you (or failing agreement, the court) have to come to a settlement which is fair to you both.

    You wouldn't normally be entitled to a share of an inheritance she received after the separation, but you might be entitled to a lump sum reflecting the share of her/joint debts you paid.

    Are there any other assets? It's unlikely to be cost effective to pursue if there is nothing else in the picture, but if there are other assets then it would be reasonable to take into account the debt in considering what is reasonable.
    All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,680 Forumite
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    TBagpuss wrote: »
    How it works is that you (or failing agreement, the court) have to come to a settlement which is fair to you both.

    You wouldn't normally be entitled to a share of an inheritance she received after the separation, but you might be entitled to a lump sum reflecting the share of her/joint debts you paid.

    Are there any other assets? It's unlikely to be cost effective to pursue if there is nothing else in the picture, but if there are other assets then it would be reasonable to take into account the debt in considering what is reasonable.

    Or pensions?
    ska_lover wrote: »
    No I don't think you should pursue a claim - that is ugly behaviour IMO

    How depressing is the thought of working all your life and leaving gifts for your children, for a long gone ex to feel entitled to it?

    I think it is morally reprehensible to go after inheritance from someone else's family and benefit from a deceased persons hard graft and the fact you have been separated for two years, and she has recently come in to this may exclude you anyway

    The debts you speak of paying, that was your choice at the time to get involved with that..and however you dress it up, inheritance chasing is always going to come across as grasping

    Walk away and retain your dignity
    I'd agree with your post if it wasn't for the debts.
    Why should one ex-partner play fair if the other won't?
  • hazyjo
    hazyjo Posts: 15,470 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post Photogenic
    Was she originally going to pay you back, or is it that you now want paying in light of her affair/the end of your marriage?


    Pursue the debt separately. If she is obliged to pay you, it doesn't really matter where the money comes from - that's just semantics. If you weren't going to go for the debt before the death, it makes you look incredibly bitter, undignified and somewhat nasty - especially as it was over two years ago. (Sorry!)
    2023 wins: *must start comping again!*
  • 74jax
    74jax Posts: 7,921 Forumite
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    A similar situation in that I was left with debt, rather than paying off during the marriage.


    Ex husband's dad died (whilst still together), but I saw that as separate. It was his Dad, not mine (although was technically my FIL).
    Forty and fabulous, well that's what my cards say....
  • Marvel1
    Marvel1 Posts: 7,171 Forumite
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    edited 15 May 2018 at 5:07PM
    I say go for it, you paid her debts and she has an affair!!
  • You could try - but be prepared for her to change her mind about agreeing to divorce. Fancy being married to her for another three years?
    I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.
    colinw wrote: »
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  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,680 Forumite
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    You could try - but be prepared for her to change her mind about agreeing to divorce. Fancy being married to her for another three years?
    Or maybe the OP could play hardball and divorce her for adultery.
    We don't know who 'the easiest' route benefits.
    Pafosp wrote: »
    Hello,im in need of help or advise.Following a two year separation,we have agreed to divorce.(i have found out she was having a affair),but to make it easy,we are going down the two years agreeable line.My ex has come into a small inheritance, and i was wondering if i was entitled to a share.? Before anyone thinks im being greedy,i paid off a lot of debt for her,which she wont pay back.Thanks in advance.
  • Pollycat wrote: »
    Or maybe the OP could play hardball and divorce her for adultery.
    We don't know who 'the easiest' route benefits.

    Have to have done that within six months and the Respondent has to admit to it, IIRC.
    I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.
    colinw wrote: »
    Yup you are officially Rock n Roll :D
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