Need help

Debtmess81 · 23 January 2019 at 7:57PM

So I’m in a mess
I have about 11k debt over 4 credit cards, a loan, 4 payday loaned everything is overdue and I’m being chased.
I got into a vicious cycle while on maternity leave in 2017 but the problem has spiralled out of control I convinced myself once I was back working I could recover but it’s not happening. I can nearly make ends meet and I just pay whoever is shouting hardest this month.
The worst part is my husband doesn’t know and now wants a joint mortgage I feel physically sick with worry I don’t know how to tell him.

Aaleigha · 23 January 2019 at 8:00PM

dont like to read and run but I doubt I have the knowledge you need
but what I do know is people are going to ask you to post a SOA so they can help you

You have done the right thing to post and ask for help
it wont be long coming

also outline everything and see if you can get an appointment at CAB a statement of account will help them to help you too

fatbelly · 23 January 2019 at 8:06PM

Debtmess81 wrote: »

So I’m in a mess
I have about 11k debt over 4 credit cards, a loan, 4 payday loaned everything is overdue and I’m being chased.
I got into a vicious cycle while on maternity leave in 2017 but the problem has spiralled out of control I convinced myself once I was back working I could recover but it’s not happening. I can nearly make ends meet and I just pay whoever is shouting hardest this month.
The worst part is my husband doesn’t know and now wants a joint mortgage I feel physically sick with worry I don’t know how to tell him.

I think the usual advice is to talk to your husband about the problem and the solution. Now at this point we don't know what the strategy is but 'just paying whoever is shouting hardest this month' is not a very good one.

If you can post a statement of affairs (link is to a calculator) we can give better guidance. Please format for mse.

Debtmess81 · 23 January 2019 at 8:09PM

My debt summary;
6500 personal loan
240 crefit card one
1700 credit card 2
1050 credit card 3
417 credit card 4
1058 payday loan
651 payday loan 2
450 payday loan 3
250 payday loan 4
Next account 36
Very account 145

Debtmess81 · 23 January 2019 at 8:28PM

I’ll do a soa to post later this evening

enthusiasticsaver · 23 January 2019 at 10:35PM

If you got into a mess with debt while on maternity leave how did your husband think you were covering your bills? Do you have completely separate finances? If the debt went on household bills and things for the baby that is as much your husbands responsibility as yours. You need to talk to him. The only way you will sort this is as a team and this affects him as much as you if you are financially associated with him or at some point you want to take on a mortgage.

The second thing you need to do is stop spending on credit and taking on loans. You have to live within your income. Budget.

An soa is the next thing you need to do.

Debtmess81 · 24 January 2019 at 12:20AM

:(My SOA
Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 2
Number of cars owned....................

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1140
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 1140

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 200
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 60
Electricity............................. 60
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 0
Telephone (land line)................... 10
Mobile phone............................ 26
TV Licence.............................. 6
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 22
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 350
Clothing................................ 5
Petrol/diesel........................... 0
Road tax................................ 0
Car Insurance........................... 0
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 100
Other child related expenses............ 30
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 7
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 16
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 10
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 10
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 20
Total monthly expenses.................. 932

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 0
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 0

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit card....................1700......20........0
Credit card....................417.......25........0
Credit card....................250.......14........0
Payday loan....................300.......103.......0
Payday loan....................244.......60........0
Payday loan....................651.......100.......0
Payday loan....................1050......105.......0
Personal loan..................6400......78........0
Credit card....................1050......35........0
Total unsecured debts..........12062.....540.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,140
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 932
Available for debt repayments........... 208
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 540
Amount short for making debt repayments. -332

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 0
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -12,062

theoretica · 24 January 2019 at 12:48AM

That only has your income on it - but to comment we need to also know how you are splitting the household costs with your husband. If it is 50/50 are you spending £700 on food between you? £350 for the four of you is not low...

Debtmess81 · 24 January 2019 at 1:09AM

Hi
Every bill is split down the middle
With the exception of :
food shopping which I buy
And my mobile phone and life assurance

Debtmess81 · 24 January 2019 at 9:19AM

I really am a nervous wreak, I don’t know where to start. I think telling my husband, but I am scared he will judge and then leave me.
It’s no excuse but he was so stressed when I was on maternity leave I really thought he was going to leave me and the kids, so when I struggled I felt unable to say anything and so the mess started, I’m so annoyed with myself I can’t currently sleep at night.

DCFC79 · 24 January 2019 at 9:30AM

You should tell him the full story but your best placed to know how he might react. Its not bad, its just over £12k so its not lkke its £20k.

Work out a plan and maybe tell him the full story and explain how you plan to get out of it with his help.

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